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Dating App GAF: Anything that makes you quickly "swipe left" on somebody?

West Texas CEO

GAF's Nicest Lunch Thief and Nosiest Dildo Archeologist
Dating apps are for pussies.
I get pussy handed to me on a silver platter without even trying.
 

Putonahappyface

Gold Member
Woman with facial piercings and earlobe stretching repulse me. Smoking cigarettes, vaping, canabis use and recreational drug use are all an instant no no for me. Also piss heads, I don't mind casual drinkers though. Obviously there needs to be a certain amount of attraction, but personality is key for me.
 

Soodanim

Member
I was in a serious relationship with this woman a couple of years ago. When we started having serious problems, even before trying to talk them out and resolve them as, you know, two grown ass adults should (and as adults have been doing since the beginning of time), her immediate go to was... therapy.

She went even further than that and said that if we wanted to go further into the relationship (we were pretty serious so she had thrown the idea of marriage around), that therapy/counseling was a required prerequisite. When she said that, I said OK, then said:

giphy.webp


I can maybe (and that's a weak maybe) understand if you've been married for several years and the marriage is hitting a dangerously low point, and you're trying to save the marriage for both of your sakes, and your children's sakes, etc.

But yeah, when you're still in the dating phase, when everything is supposed to be good and you're not jaded yet? Therapy at THAT point? Nah, fuck that. It tells me your conflict resolution skills are weak AF.
100%, I would be the same way. Was your ex into following celebrities on social media? I have a sneaky suspicion that people are being influenced by Hollywood's obsession with therapy. They all do it, and it's at the point where the people that don't go to therapy are seen as the weird ones. Kristin Bell and Dax Shepard's marriage in particular seems to be held up as shining example of a marriage (even though they say it's not) and they do therapy all the time.

I know Hollywood is a strange world full of poorly adjusted people owing in part to the culture of being fake and most actors being needy attention seekers, but do people really have so little capability that they can't sit down with someone they care about without a third party telling them how to talk?

What a strange world we live in.
 
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Peggies

Gold Member
Yeah it all started in the 40s as a way to prevent kids to masturbate and not feel too much pleasure during sex… it is amazing how now became the norm. Also this from a country who is against abortions but has no problems to cause pain to newborn baby boys…
Exactly! I find cut penises weird. I don't feel comfortable with them. The tip is so intensive.

And the poor baby boys :messenger_crying:...
 

Ionian

Member
100%, I would be the same way. Was your ex into following celebrities on social media? I have a sneaky suspicion that people are being influenced by Hollywood's obsession with therapy. They all do it, and it's at the point where the people that don't go to therapy are seen as the weird ones. Kristin Bell and Dax Shepard's marriage in particular seems to be held up as shining example of a marriage (even though they say it's not) and they do therapy all the time.

I know Hollywood is a strange world full of poorly adjusted people owing in part to the culture of being fake and most actors being needy attention seekers, but do people really have so little capability that they can't sit down with someone they care about without a third party telling them how to talk?

What a strange world we live in.
I had to go to therapy for panic attacks. Was from smoking weed. Even attended with a love bite. Pharmacy next door girl looked disgusted, gave concealer for free.

I didn't care, kinda proud. With her 10 glorious years. Hadn't one since a teenager, made me feel young again.
 
Women have no skill on how to get a man. Period. So when they say bullshit like “surprise me, make me laugh” or “say more than hello” - bitch, bring your A game on as well. You ain’t special. Sometimes you see women with just a profile pic and nothing else on their profile, literally blank. Automatic no. That tells me you have nothing to offer other than your looks.

Also, women who say shit like “I’m smart, funny, witty, and adventurous” - LOL! Anybody, man or woman, who needs to validate themself by saying they’re smart are kidding themselves, 😂
 
Never had to use an ap. Get girls easy peasy, not ashamed about it either.
It's even easier on an app.

That's kind of the whole premise of the thread, right? That we have it so good that we can choose to be picky?

If we didn't have it good, we'd be desperate and bang the first "Live, Laugh, Love" blue-haired whale that shows up at our door 😂
 

Soodanim

Member
I had to go to therapy for panic attacks. Was from smoking weed. Even attended with a love bite. Pharmacy next door girl looked disgusted, gave concealer for free.

I didn't care, kinda proud. With her 10 glorious years. Hadn't one since a teenager, made me feel young again.
Which one, the pharmacy girl or the lovebiter?
 

Tams

Member
Women have no skill on how to get a man. Period. So when they say bullshit like “surprise me, make me laugh” or “say more than hello” - bitch, bring your A game on as well. You ain’t special. Sometimes you see women with just a profile pic and nothing else on their profile, literally blank. Automatic no. That tells me you have nothing to offer other than your looks.

Also, women who say shit like “I’m smart, funny, witty, and adventurous” - LOL! Anybody, man or woman, who needs to validate themself by saying they’re smart are kidding themselves, 😂
It's only slightly better here in Japan.

Many profile pics are of things. I mean, it gives you something with a bit of substance to work on I guess? Then there are the photos of them from the back, or from obscure angles. The worst are the group photos (and they all to often end up being the ugly one).
 

YCoCg

Member
"if you only say "hello" swipe left, be original and surprise me"
while having an empty bio that gives you no cues.


You make an effort too, bitch. It's 2022. Parity.
I used to hate these ones, ESPECIALLY if you matched and THEY start the convo with "hey", like bitch hold yourself to your own standards!
 
I keep swiping left because I'm still looking for your MOTHER.

But seriously, I swipe insta left when their bio is all 'hit me up on insta can't read messages on here (insert insta name)'.

Fuck off, I'm not here just to up your number on how many instagram followers you have.
 
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Fuz

Banned
I used to hate these ones, ESPECIALLY if you matched and THEY start the convo with "hey", like bitch hold yourself to your own standards!
Never seen a woman starting the conversation, in Italy. I did had some starting the conversation in Korea, Japan, UK and some other countries. Italians? They never do. Maybe if you're a Chris Evans or something.

Anyway, blame the doormat "males" for allowing those standards.
 

Roufianos

Member
I always swiped left on girls with pronouns and political bs in their bios.

If that's the defining point of your personality then you can't be much fun.

The irony is I met my current gf on Hinge and she's fairly woke but at least she's not insufferable about it.
 

Mistake

Member
I always swiped left on girls with pronouns and political bs in their bios.

If that's the defining point of your personality then you can't be much fun.

The irony is I met my current gf on Hinge and she's fairly woke but at least she's not insufferable about it.
I’m pretty sure anyone who doesn’t tow the party line is banned when it comes to online dating apps. I very rarely saw profiles outside one kind of view. It makes them look bad when you see only one side is single lol
 
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Smokken

Banned
Back in the early days of Tinder, there were actually normal people using it. Tried it for a month recently, and holy crap. The amount of communist/non monogami/narcissists is through the roof. Didn't swipe right on a single woman, it was just a sea of shitty people. Uninstalled and never looked back. I feel sorry for you youngsters growing up in this environment.
 
Saw a profile just this morning.

"I'm looking for someone to...

... Help me smash the patriarchy..."

There was other stuff after that but I immediately stopped reading and swiped left 😂 Because let me tell you, young lady... While you're busy "smashing the patriarchy," you know what WON'T be getting smashed, by any guy?

You.
 
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Ionian

Member
New girlfriend. Pharmacist was older, hence the shock. I didn't ask for one, she just did as was super horny.
Told me she had a boyfriend, didn't believe her.
She did, i felt awful but the dude was a prick, her best mate tried to find another for her, different dude but once she saw me. Her mate told her to kiss me and she said only if i kiss you first.

They did, then 10 years of love. Still very good friends to this day.
 

Mistake

Member
Saw a profile just this morning.

"I'm looking for someone to...

... Help me smash the patriarchy..."

There was other stuff after that but I immediately stopped reading and swiped left 😂 Because let me tell you, young lady... While you're busy "smashing the patriarchy," you know what WON'T be getting smashed, by any guy?

You.
My favorite are the anti-capitalists. Like eyyyy girlll, hope you don’t have a job
 
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Lady Jane

Banned
Back in the early days of Tinder, there were actually normal people using it. Tried it for a month recently, and holy crap. The amount of communist/non monogami/narcissists is through the roof. Didn't swipe right on a single woman, it was just a sea of shitty people. Uninstalled and never looked back. I feel sorry for you youngsters growing up in this environment.

Tinder at its birth was peak Tinder. It wasn't a dating app. It was a hook up app and everyone on there knew it. I was like 21 when Tinder started and the conversations on there were short and clear. And honestly, most men on there were confident. Only used it for that purpose twice when my weekend plans were shot. My sister recently moved cities and now the confident men are 20% of the people on there, if not less. Full of profiles saying "Love to travel!" and "I'm a guy who cooks!" Let me guess, the first date idea is a board game bar and your favorite pic is the one where she's covering herself the most? Bored us to tears.

She was successful on Hinge with finding good guys.
 
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Tinder at its birth was peak Tinder. It wasn't a dating app. It was a hook up app and everyone on there knew it. I was like 21 when Tinder started and the conversations on there were short and clear. And honestly, most men on there were confident. Only used it for that purpose twice when my weekend plans were shot. My sister recently moved cities and now the confident men are 20% of the people on there, if not less. Full of profiles saying "Love to travel!" and "I'm a guy who cooks!" Let me guess, the first date idea is a board game bar and your favorite pic is the one where she's covering herself the most? Bored us to tears.

She was successful on Hinge with finding good guys.
All good points.

Not sure if you're American, but do remember that here in the United States, there has long been a movement where (some) women publicly say that men have to be "in touch with their feelings" and "sensitive" and some such bullshit.

In reality, the women I've dated have absolutely hated that. They say it publicly, but when in private and deeper conversations they admit they don't like "weak" men or men that don't "have a spine." (Their words, not mine)

Like, if I come home from work and had a shitty work day, is ANY reasonable woman going to find it attractive if I start complaining and crying like a little bitch about my work day? I won't ever pretend to speak for women but, to ME, that behavior is outright repulsive. As a man, I should be able to toughen up and internalize shit and be able to solve problems.

If anything, I'd think with girlfriends in the past, when we both came home from work, they wanted ME to listen to THEM vent about their work day.
 

Lady Jane

Banned
All good points.

Not sure if you're American, but do remember that here in the United States, there has long been a movement where (some) women publicly say that men have to be "in touch with their feelings" and "sensitive" and some such bullshit.

In reality, the women I've dated have absolutely hated that. They say it publicly, but when in private and deeper conversations they admit they don't like "weak" men or men that don't "have a spine." (Their words, not mine)

Like, if I come home from work and had a shitty work day, is ANY reasonable woman going to find it attractive if I start complaining and crying like a little bitch about my work day? I won't ever pretend to speak for women but, to ME, that behavior is outright repulsive. As a man, I should be able to toughen up and internalize shit and be able to solve problems.

If anything, I'd think with girlfriends in the past, when we both came home from work, they wanted ME to listen to THEM vent about their work day.

I'm American and I've probably said that publicly too. We have to keep our dignity after-all. The goal of dating apps is to score a first date. That's it, nothing more. Men who are throwing their life goals in their bio are over doing it. Can I lean on you for support? Are you fun to be around? Are you normal? These are the questions that need to be answered in the first ~7 messages. Always initiate the date and do it the very moment you think she feels comfortable with you.

My SO has two brothers and I built both of their profiles for them and even talked to girls. They were sweating bullets on some of the messages I sent and it worked out every time. Guys think too much.
 
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nush

Member
there has long been a movement where (some) women publicly say that men have to be "in touch with their feelings" and "sensitive" and some such bullshit.

In reality, the women I've dated have absolutely hated that. They say it publicly, but when in private and deeper conversations they admit they don't like "weak" men or men that don't "have a spine." (Their words, not mine)

Women, don't listen to what they say in dating, watch what they do.
 

nush

Member
My SO has two brothers and I built both of their profiles for them and even talked to girls. They were sweating bullets on some of the messages I sent and it worked out every time. Guys think too much.

That's nice of you to help those guys out. So are you going to share with us guys some insider information on what makes good profiles and messages?
 

DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
Activist
Fighting the patriarchy
Club goer
Under 30
Non-existent breasts (small A-Cup)
Normie hobbies
Modern definition "Woke AF"


If anything like that is on their profile... I hope they find a great guy that accepts them as is. Just won't be me.
 
Activist
Fighting the patriarchy
Club goer
Under 30
Non-existent breasts (small A-Cup)
Normie hobbies
Modern definition "Woke AF"


If anything like that is on their profile... I hope they find a great guy that accepts them as is. Just won't be me.
I have to say, DT... Didn't expect this kind of answer from you. So I'll just say that I'm (very pleasantly) surprised 👍🏽
 

DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
I have to say, DT... Didn't expect this kind of answer from you. So I'll just say that I'm (very pleasantly) surprised 👍🏽

There's a certain mindset behind a lot of that... Too young of a mindset. I'm fairly progressive but I can't do being told I'm old-fashioned or not enough of this or that. I'm almost 50! I just want a blerd/geek, Christian, somewhat athletic girl that I think is attractive and our interests align.

ETA: I actually know a woman like this... And she's close to my age. She's my best friend but I'm not her type and that's ok. It isn't impossible to find what you truly want and need in a woman. If she exists, another or more should, too.
 
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Went on a date Friday (been going to A LOT of those lately). Sneaky chick got past my online filter and then I got smacked with a dose of reality at the actual date. But I humorously turned it around. I don't remember the exact dialogue so I'm paraphrasing. Keep in mind that this is a white woman and I'm Afro-Caribbean myself, which adds to the hilarity of the situation.

Her: "we have a vicious and brutal history and should pay reparations."

Me: "I agree. You see, I'm a gentleman and was going to pay for our dinner, but I think you can be a good ally to the cause and pay reparations... By paying for my dinner."

Her reaction:

thats-different-different.gif



😂😂😂 These fucking people, man...

If I was of a weaker mind I'd get pissed off, disappointed, etc. But now this shit is just hilarious.
 
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Mistake

Member
Went on a date Friday (been going to A LOT of those lately). Sneaky chick got past my online filter and then I got smacked with a dose of reality at the actual date. But I humorously turned it around. I don't remember the exact dialogue so I'm paraphrasing. Keep in mind that this is a white woman and I'm Afro-Caribbean myself, which adds to the hilarity of the situation.

Her: "we have a vicious and brutal history and should pay reparations."

Me: "I agree. You see, I'm a gentleman and was going to pay for our dinner, but I think you can be a good ally to the cause and pay reparations... By paying for my dinner."

Her reaction:

thats-different-different.gif



😂😂😂 These fucking people, man...

If I was of a weaker mind I'd get pissed off, disappointed, etc. But now this shit is just hilarious.
All fun and games until it’s their wallet. You’re doing the lord’s work sir, keep it up :messenger_grinning_smiling:
 
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DeafTourette

Perpetually Offended
Went on a date Friday (been going to A LOT of those lately). Sneaky chick got past my online filter and then I got smacked with a dose of reality at the actual date. But I humorously turned it around. I don't remember the exact dialogue so I'm paraphrasing. Keep in mind that this is a white woman and I'm Afro-Caribbean myself, which adds to the hilarity of the situation.

Her: "we have a vicious and brutal history and should pay reparations."

Me: "I agree. You see, I'm a gentleman and was going to pay for our dinner, but I think you can be a good ally to the cause and pay reparations... By paying for my dinner."

Her reaction:

thats-different-different.gif



😂😂😂 These fucking people, man...

If I was of a weaker mind I'd get pissed off, disappointed, etc. But now this shit is just hilarious.

Now see... THIS is hilarious! She's a "in theory" ally. Not a literal one. LMBO!
 

FunkMiller

Member
Over a size 10.
Religious.
Butter face.
Kids.
Pronouns.
Older.

….I thank fuck every single day I’ve been out of the dating scene for many years. Looks bastard awful.
 
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