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[sono]

I can only say that the pain of this is something that you learn to live with, if that helps.

 

[Trunx81]

Next year marks the 40th anniversary of my mother’s death. I was just a small kid back then, so there are only a few memories of her which I can value. I’m still thinking often about what a person I would have been if she would have stayed around.

Worst trigger for me was that Buffy episode “The body”, when Buffy finds her mother lying dead on the couch .. that was me, nearly 40 years ago.

But I know she’s watching me from above, guiding me and giving me hope. And like someone said before: I will see her again. Take care, folks!

 

[Raven117]

I’m still thinking often about what a person I would have been if she would have stayed around.

I wasn't as young as you, but I have this same thought often.

 

[Raven117]

Thought of this thread

I dreamed my Mom was hugged me last night when I was sleeping, felt real, I could feel her hands grasp mine and smell her naturally sweet scent while she told me she's proud of me and to keep going

She's happy

These are the strangest dreams. You wake up with such a weird feeling of having seen your mother, but the bitter taste of reality crashing down.

My mom was in hospice almost 10 years ago. I'm the last one left in my family

Goodness. You aren't alone. You may feel that way, but you arent.

I'm adopted but I always knew it. 4 years ago in August, my birth mom passed of a heart attack. Amazingly not because of COVID.

A little while later I found out who my bio dad is and then in November, I met him! We have been in contact since then... But then he kept losing his phone or forgetting to charge it or not being able to figure it out ... He had to be put in a nursing home last year and around summer this year, he had to be put in hospice. He was losing too much weight and pretty much bedridden. The last time I talked to him on video call was early last week, I believe. And it was the last I saw him. I told him I loved him and I hope to see him soon.

I got the call Monday afternoon that he passed away. He was too weak.

Funeral is this weekend.

I'm sorry to hear this. At least you got an opportunity to tell him that you loved him. For both of you. Im sure things are very surreal right now. Probably numb. There is some comfort in being a part of the funeral service. Family and friends. Having some responsibilities o take care of with that. Might as well take advantage of the distraction. That said, in a few weeks, when every one leaves and you are back home. Quiet. Things may get tough as you start to sort through the emotions. Come on back here if you need to write something down.

Hey man we're here for each other. I'm going see my Dad in December one last time. His cancer is rough and his dementia is weird, he's crazy one moment but then clearly ask me all the time why I haven't seen him since my mom died, it's extremely bizarre to me to see this happening.

So... Yeah I guess I'm saying our dads end is similar, or will be, if you need to chat my DMS are open

At least you get to see him again. Sounds like there is some complications there, but that makes it all the more complicated to work through.

 

[Puscifer]

In less than a year I've been left parentless

I've moved across the country coast to coast for work several times, visited parts of the world by myself, taken job opportunities that were a gamble and many other things and yet somehow I've never felt so lonely and lost than I do now

 

[HRK69]

Nvm

 

[OmegaSupreme]

I always hate to see this thread bumped. It's been almost seven years since my father passed and it's still hard to believe. It's hard to accept still. I'm going to see my mother this summer. She's 72 and has survived two bouts of cancer. She's across the country so I haven't seen her nearly as much as I'd like but I'm saving up this year and will spend a week with her in July.

 

[Trilobit]

My dad died a little over a week ago. I rarely react strongly to things right when they happen, but rather a few months later when I've digested it. The realization that I won't be able to call him and joke around comes every now and then, but otherwise I think I'm still somewhat in shock. I've never really had anyone I was close to who's died so I'll take my time processing things.

He still got well over 70 years old and also had some illnesses so it wasn't as shocking as having a parent die in their 50s or 60s. But dead is dead no matter how it happened. I had very kind police officers who came over to deliver the news in person and they even offered to stay as long as I wanted them to, so that's a nice gesture "society" provides. Two of the tree were women and I could see that one of them had real trouble looking at me as she seemed saddened over having to be the bearer of bad news, that must be a really rough part of their job.

Anyhow, I've been avoiding to think too much about it since I already suffer from depression so I don't want to spiral even further into sadness right now, I'll mourn properly when I feel ready over a longer time.

My heart goes out, in a non-hand-gesture-way, to all the rest of you.