This game is wild.
I guess I had a Demon's Souls moment playing it the other night.
The first level and boss were pretty easy. I wasn't quite ready to poo poo all the talk I've read about this game being hard as nuts, but the notion that it wasn't that hard (or I was just that good) was in the back of my head. That shit changed pretty quickly in the second level. I got my shit pushed in about 5 times by some fat laughing fuck who tossed fireballs and his pack of loud ass motherfucking barking dogs. But that was just me being garbage. His pattern is nothing special, the dogs aren't especially troublesome if you fight them in the right place, and I was just being a chump.
Once I figured out how to deal with that dude I was rolling again. My guy is a Royal and I just toss fireballs / soul arrows at hard enemies while cleaning up the scrubs with a rapier. My fireball does enough damage to kill practically everything except the fat dudes in one hit. I have an absolutely silly amount of healing grass. Once again, I'm getting that feeling. This game isn't that tough. You roll out of the way, you shoot a fireball, it's cake.
After cruising for a bit I'm at what must be the boss room, because it's covered in webs and the door is huge. I walk in, this big ass spider is shooting fireballs down a tunnel at me. Oh wow, look, something else to roll away from. Easy. Then all of the sudden it pegs me with a web, and now I'm stuck, and it follows up with a fireball that eats most of my health. I run behind a corner that someone has conveniently marked as "safe" (by the way the fucking messages crack me up) and chow some grass. OK, so dodge the web shot, dodge the fireball, get up close to the spider, hit him. Easy.
Not fucking easy.
I try, but my fat western fingers aren't fast enough. My MTV addled brain is not fast enough. I get hit by webs. I get hit by fireballs. The spider wins. He doesn't just win. He beat me up and he robbed my souls. They're in his zone. Getting them back is a one way trip. So fuck that shit, I am all heated from getting beat and from losing like 5k souls. I am going back in there.
And he kills me, again. And again. And again.
I'm not sure how many times total. At least 3 or 4. Every time, I try some goofball strategy or positioning trick, and it doesn't help. My once vast supply of grass is now almost gone. Like, I ate all the fucking grass fighting this guy. He's still got my souls. I am almost at the breaking point. The web is too fast. It's impossible to dodge once you're stuck. I come this close to throwing the pad into the ground, but self control gets the better of it and I just let the thing drop from slightly too tall a height. I am fucking salty.
It was close. I was this close to saying to hell with it, letting the stupid spider have the souls and calling it a night. But man FUCK THAT. That is some bullshit. Fucking games are for conquering and I will be fucked if I'm going to let this spider get the better of me. I pack up my last few pieces of grass and head back in.
And this time it clicks. I see the spider always hops out of sight before shooting his web. Now I can dodge it. Without the web to slow me down, fireballs are nothing. I am just straight blasting this motherfucker with soul arrows right to his stupid spider grill. He's not even touching me. After a few minutes it's over. That dude is dead. I point directly at my television and yell "that's right, fuck you. Gimme my souls."
I really like this game. It has some amazing annoying jank with the auto aim and the camera in tight places, but overall it is a magical weeaboo experience. It's games like Demon's Souls that make me happy there's still crazy ass Japanese studios cranking out absolutely batshit games.
