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[PeteBull]

Looks like no one on GAF is going to play it.

We may never know how the game actually is.

I saw few(maybe 10 or so) ppl claiming they gonna buy it, and i believe them, we even had concord players here(i think 2 or 3) and that game sold 25k copies worldwide

Not gonna tell others what to do with their hard earned money- if some1 isnt offput/disgusted with all the woke stuff, loves western rpg genre and doesnt mind overall very low quality of story/dialogues/combat system they will buy the game for sure.

Its like some guys have high tolerance for hoe stuff women do and will marry a stripper/onlyfans "model" if she is hot enough , some cant stand it even if they just wanna smash and dash

 

[Toots]

I saw this on X and thought it was a joke post.

There's no way this is real, right?

Edit:

LMAOOOOO

If dev had balls they'd lock some items behind the evil non multicultural background affirming villain path

Eurogamer FFS.

Tried my best to draw that weirdo but now he looks like a hotline miami character

 

[DonkeyPunchJr]

Finally watched the SkillUp review. That was BRUTAL. Sounds like the mainstream gaming sites are once again calling their credibility into question by going easy on this game for obvious ideological reasons.

It’s going to be hilarious when the normie gaming public get their hands on this game.

 

[GymWolf]

I haven't watched Mortisimal, so I don't know what to make of that. My first instinct is to say that if you praise this game as GOTY and best DA game ever, that is a mark against your taste and credibility as a reviewer.

Pretty much, dude lost ALL of his credibility with a single review.

 

[SJRB]

Finally watched the SkillUp review. That was BRUTAL. Sounds like the mainstream gaming sites are once again calling their credibility into question by going easy on this game for obvious ideological reasons.

It’s going to be hilarious when the normie gaming public get their hands on this game.

Yeah it was savage. God bless him for providing ample examples, too. The proof that the game is terrible is right there in the video.

The "puzzle" segments alone are enough to deduct two points off this game's score. Outrageously bad.

 

[SaturnSaturn]

It will probably sell well, most "normal" people dont read gaming news and keep tabs of it, they just see "oh cool a dragon age game" and go out and buy it, the part is when they get to play it and see how much of a dumpster fire it is they wont buy the next. More "seasoned" players read news, forums and gaming sites and will not buy it in the first place. So the drop will be noticable in the next iteration of the series As you wont get an influx of normal players/fans next time. For example i expect spider man 3 to sell like garbage after normal people got played by 2.

 

[Angry_Megalodon]

It will probably sell well, most "normal" people dont read gaming news and keep tabs of it, they just see "oh cool a dragon age game" and go out and buy it, the part is when they get to play it and see how much of a dumpster fire it is they wont buy the next. More "seasoned" players read news, forums and gaming sites and will not buy it in the first place. So the drop will be noticable in the next iteration of the series As you wont get an influx of normal players/fans next time. For example i expect spider man 3 to sell like garbage after normal people got played by 2.

It will sell less but never like garbage because Spider-Man 2 is a well-made video game. Dragon Agen can't compare to it from any technical standpoint.

 

[splattered]

So is this the videogame version of Jim Carrey's over-confident gay guy from Mad TV? Too bad, I liked the previous DA games. I'm also going to skip this title I suppose.

 

[balls of snow]

Looks like no one on GAF is going to play it.

We may never know how the game actually is.

I will be playing and I reckon a few others as well here. Wont be in the ot lol. Something tells me it will devolve into the same old shit by page 2.5.

 

[Ass of Can Whooping]

I will be playing and I reckon a few others as well here. Wont be in the ot lol. Something tells me it will devolve into the same old shit by page 2.5.

I'll be sharing my romantic adventures with Taash in the OT. The bigots won't stop me

 

[Denton]

You Guys are crazy. Get help. And grow up.

Pretty sure the people who can't decide if they are man or woman are the crazy ones who need help there chief

 

[balls of snow]

I'll be sharing my romantic adventures with Taash in the OT. The bigots won't stop me

My lady elf has a thing for older (read: might as well be in a retirement home) guys. She likes that decrepid smell. And the skeleton can watch.

 

[Thief1987]

I trust journalist more than user reviews, just look at the cultist reactions over Here. At least a journalist is not anonymous. That alone make it more trustworthy than Some crazy guy who just wants to see the world burn because they dont agree with something.

You are absolutely right, don't think just consume. Our beloved corporations need us.

 

[ShaiKhulud1989]

After skimming through all the available dialogue snippets I've cancelled my PC pre-order.

Bland non-conflict safe-space writing in a narrative-driven game can pound sand for all I care.

 

[Chuck Berry]

First option should have been "Yikes!"

Should’ve been -

“Yikes”
“Oof”
“If that’s the hill you want to die on…”

 

[Angry_Megalodon]

I trust journalist more than user reviews, just look at the cultist reactions over Here. At least a journalist is not anonymous. That alone make it more trustworthy than Some crazy guy who just wants to see the world burn because they dont agree with something.

Your arguments are Nobel prize-worthy, just like the random use of capitals.

How's the pay at Kotaku?

 

[Toots]

Should’ve been -

“Yikes”
“Oof”
“If that’s the hill you want to die on…”

special dialogue only accessible if you choose a trans character :

There's a lot to unpack here...
BLM (raise their fist in the air while kneeling)
I cannot kill you, you're already cancelled for what you said about Qunaris 25 years ago.

(All these options automatically makes you win the fight of course)

 

[MarV0]

Eurogamer FFS.

2024 the year when getting laid in real life is far easier than in a dumb video game.

 

[Dr Cowley]

Your arguments are Nobel prize-worthy, just like the random use of capitals.

How's the pay at Kotaku?

Either ramen noodles or a go on mercunty.

 

[Toots]

Guys if you're not afraid of spoilers i have a picture of the final boss

Spoiler

 

[Chuck Berry]

Looks like no one on GAF is going to play it.

We may never know how the game actually is.

Then how about you play it then dude?

Be the guinea pig for once

 

[Gonzito]

Guys if you're not afraid of spoilers i have a picture of the final boss

Spoiler

Hahahahaha

 

[sudolicious]

lmao this whole dumpsterfire is a hilarious mess 25 pages or so within a day, need to watch the 45 minute SkillUp thing later on.

I expected this to be bad, since it's BioWare, but I didn't have my hopes up for it to crash and burn this spectacularly, it's nice to get a good laugh out of this.

 

[GinSama]

Please tell me that this is fake. Please.

Don't think so saw that exact same picture around and it was taken from the IGN video review

 

[Doom85]

Guys if you're not afraid of spoilers i have a picture of the final boss

Spoiler

Spoiler

NICE, the villain monologue will be one to remember!

Final boss: “In Thedas, they’re eating the dogs, the Qunari that came in, they’re eating the cats, they’re eating the pets of the elves that live there!”

 

[Laptop1991]

Mostly !0 out 10's or 9.5, 5 out of 5 or 4.5's, bring on the gamer's and user's scores lol.

 

[Branded]

Like Fleekazoid said "if it offends you: don't uuuuuuse it" with the fact that we don't have normal sliders for upper and lower body 'proportions'. Ahem.

 

[adamsapple]

So all said and done, looks like the game has settled on an 83 aggregate, which is a few points higher than I thought it would end up at.

For Bioware's sake, I hope it does decently commercially as well.

 

[winjer]

 

[UnrealEck]

Like Fleekazoid said "if it offends you: don't uuuuuuse it" with the fact that we don't have normal sliders for upper and lower body 'proportions'. Ahem.

It's crazy how these sorts of things always end up insulting or diminishing actual womanhood or being feminine and replaces it with a masculine version of a woman.

 

[PeteBull]

So all said and done, looks like the game has settled on an 83 aggregate, which is a few points higher than I thought it would end up at.

For Bioware's sake, I hope it does decently commercially as well.

Score will go down, wait till ppl who didnt get free early review copies will add their reviews too, it will still be inflated af tho.

 

[Sgt.Asher]

How do you write dialog more juvenile than a put-put game?

 

[ElFenomeno]

For Bioware's sake, I hope it does decently commercially as well.

For Bioware's sake? What Bioware? That studio is long gone.
The studio can close for all I care. They had a string of shit games. Why should they afford the luxury to produce shit after shit when other studios close after 1 flop?

 

[Humdinger]

Looks like most of GAF guessed correctly where it would land. We still have the non-access media reviews to come, but I don't expect those will lower it more than a point or two.

I'm curious how it'll sell. I expect it to do all right, because of the Dragon Age name, flashy combat, and late-stage marketing. Probably not as well as Bioware would have hoped, but it'll do okay. I don't particularly care what happens to Bioware, as they've been a husk of their former selves for a long time now.

 

[Tokio Blues]

Andromeda and Anthem are epic masterpieces comparing to this.

 

[Krathoon]

It's crazy how these sorts of things always end up insulting or diminishing actual womanhood or being feminine and replaces it with a masculine version of a woman.

That is what is so nuts about it. It is like they are just trying to replace women with dudes.

 

[IDKFA]

Eurogamer calling this best Bioware game? I haven't played it, but from the video reviews I've seen I can't see how that is the case.

It looks like a very family friendly, safe, sterile world that goes out of it's way to ensure nobody is offended. That doesn't sound like Dragon Age to me.

 

[Fake]

First option should have been "Yikes!"

The second should have been "Touch the grass".

 

[Draugoth]

So all said and done, looks like the game has settled on an 83 aggregate, which is a few points higher than I thought it would end up at.

For Bioware's sake, I hope it does decently commercially as well.

Scores will be lower once other reviewers get the hands on it, this is a Starfield/Cyberpunk 2077 situation again.

 

[GHG]

For Bioware's sake, I hope it does decently commercially as well.

Why? So they can produce more slop like this?

 

[Imru’ al-Qays]

I just watched Mortisimal Gaming review of the game and to him this is a GotY contender and the best entry in the series. I'm rather confused now, but I'm still currently leaning towards believing Skill Up mainly because he gave lots of examples with footage for most of his criticisms.

Mort is a solid guy but he really only seems to care about gameplay, he has next to no critical eye when it comes to story and writing at all. And frankly he's probably afraid to definitively take a side on the wokeness debate

 

[adamsapple]

Why? So they can produce more slop like this?

I want a Mass Effect 5 for my selfish reasons.

 

[GHG]

I want a Mass Effect 5 for my selfish reasons.

If it ends up anything like this you might end up wishing the franchise remained in a state of peaceful rest.

 

[strike670]

So is this the videogame version of Jim Carrey's over-confident gay guy from Mad TV? Too bad, I liked the previous DA games. I'm also going to skip this title I suppose.

Jim Carey was on MadTV? He was on In Living Colour and do not recall him ever playing a "over-confident gay guy".

 

[Krathoon]

Did they ever fix up Mass Effect Andromeda? I should give it a spin again.

 

[GHG]

Mort is a solid guy but he really only seems to care about gameplay, he has next to no critical eye when it comes to story and writing at all. And frankly he's probably afraid to definitively take a side on the wokeness debate

That's not true, he dedicates a portion of all of his reviews to this very subject. It's just that he's decided to gloss over it here in order to remain in yet another big publishers good books.

He's going to soon find out that it wasn't worth it.

 

[DonkeyPunchJr]

Did they ever fix up Mass Effect Andromeda? I should give it a spin again.

They fixed the bugs but it still has those horrendous animations and retarded dialog.

I tried to give it another shot a couple years ago, all it did was remind me why I didn’t finish the game the first time.

 

[PeteBull]

Jim Carey was on MadTV? He was on In Living Colour and do not recall him ever playing a "over-confident gay guy".

it was pretty fire to say the least

 

[strike670]

I am so tired of this over dramatized bullshit about video games of all things. It's both sides honestly, has me debating quitting gaming altogether.

The last Bioware game I got into was the Mass Effect Trilogy. I tried DA: Inquisition back in 2016, but couldn't get into it. I tried it again in 2019, and was starting to enjoy it but my wife had a baby and I got really busy and dropped it. I here the combat in this game is lackluster which is concerning. I don't pay much attention to the silly stupid shit coming from this forum and elsewhere about the usual "woke" crap people love to cry about.

I most likely will never play this at least for the foreseeable future, as I still have Balder's Gate 3 and Dragon's Dogma 2 to play.

 

[Imru’ al-Qays]

That's not true, he dedicates a portion of all of his reviews to this very subject. It's just that he's decided to gloss over it here in order to remain in yet another big publishers good books.

He's going to soon find out that it wasn't worth it.

When was the last time he was critical about the story and writing of a game? Even for games where this is a major problem, like FFXVI, he basically always says "I liked the story."