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[SolVanderlyn]

Conversely, everyone in high school thought I was gay and some still do. I'm not at all

...hello, top of the page

 

[Misha]

That's the thing though. You need to talk it out.

A lot of people in my high school didn't come out until after they graduated even though it was painfully obvious to everyone. It became a formality to come out at that point.

A text wouldn't be the end of it. You can still talk next time you hang out (and that indeed would be the plan)

I just thought of a few things that might explain why I don't see these things as issues:
I tend to like to have all the information before reacting to things including reading full plot synopses before seeing a movie
I dislike being put on the spot in general with things. I'd rather know it's going to happen
I dislike formalities a ton. I'd rather not address something if I don't have to

 

[zeemumu]

A text wouldn't be the end of it. You can still talk next time you hang out

I just thought of a few things that might explain why I don't see these things as issues:
I tend to like to have all the information before reacting to things including reading full plot synopses before seeing a movie
I dislike being put on the spot in general with things. I'd rather know it's going to happen
I dislike formalities a ton. I'd rather not address something if I don't have to

Then don't. Unless your roommates are transphobic it matters very little as far as apartment hunting is concerned

But if you do, don't do it through text.

 

[WhereAreMahDragonz]

noooo Bellamy is such a dick. Jasper too
but that lexa vs. ice nation dude fight...holy shit

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I KNOW RIGHT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Granadier]

Well it doesn't work so much in that it's part of the trying to get my roommates in on it thing but I've always liked that idea for everyone else so I'm glad to see that works.

Also I need to start with some education for family members but that's a completely different set of complexities

Whatever way you end up choosing I hope that it goes well for you Misha.

 

[marrec]

A text wouldn't be the end of it. You can still talk next time you hang out (and that indeed would be the plan)

I just thought of a few things that might explain why I don't see these things as issues:
I tend to like to have all the information before reacting to things including reading full plot synopses before seeing a movie
I dislike being put on the spot in general with things. I'd rather know it's going to happen
I dislike formalities a ton. I'd rather not address something if I don't have to

I get where you're coming from and I would actually rather have a short text priming the pump for any biggish thing. Like, that way I can get my mind right pre-in person talk.

But generally it's accepted to not do news like that via text.

I say do it and see what happens.

 

[liliththepale]

Well it doesn't work so much in that it's part of the trying to get my roommates in on it thing but I've always liked that idea for everyone else so I'm glad to see that works.

Also I need to start with some education for family members but that's a completely different set of complexities

I guess I would question why it's important to come out. Is it just so that you get the right names/pronouns? Is there some way you expect to be treated differently/more appropriately? Do you need to stop feeling like you're hiding something? Do you need to try and find an ally who will support you through your transition?

I'm not trying to be obtuse. I just think it's important to know why you want to do something when it's something this important. It gives your mind some solid place to camp out at while you fumble for words to explain, rather than being lost in some vortex of emotion.

If you need to have a prepared statement, that's fine, but this is something most people are going to have a lot of questions about. Remember that they haven't had years of dwelling on it like you have. They haven't spent months or more researching online. They haven't been following the legal cases with the same fervor to make sure you'll be alright in the future. They don't know all of the scientific reasons for all of it. And most importantly they don't know that you're sure about it. It's only natural for people to have questions at this stage of social progress, so if you come out to someone you're putting the onus on yourself to have the answers, or at least admit that you don't have the answers.

If you're going to do it by text then absolutely make sure they know you're open to talking about it in person, and absolutely be ready to do so when you next meet up.

 

[trab pu kcip]

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I KNOW RIGHT !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

SO BADASS!!!!!!!

she's the only thing that's redeeming this episode

 

[zeemumu]

If it's causing unnecessary stress or if you think it's something that would alter the way that they feel about you then you need to talk to them.

 

[That Dude John]

Yes

You mean the best?

Jin's 3D Glasses got me dying

 

[Misha]

Then don't. Unless your roommates are transphobic it matters very little.

But if you do, don't do it through text.

Tbf that was my initial plan before I was convinced it would be worth making clear before moving in

It would need to be verbalized eventually but I guess if I lived with them then I'd be much happier doing it fade to face then (or at least it being super weird to text it to someone five feet away would make that the only option )

 

[FloatOn]

my ex-wife informed me that she was moving out over text.

I came home from school to find her packing a bag. I can say with complete certainty that I would have preferred having the conversation in person.

 

[RobotNinjaHornets]

and this is why communicating on the internet is whack

I don't think I said that it wasn't legitimate and I'm not sure what gave that impression. from what I recall I basically just said that making excuses is lame and that I was annoyed and that he should get help because my brother didn't and it caused my family hell

but it's water under the bridge at this point. like I said, I'm trying to be nicer these days

Oh I don't know, maybe

sorry I have very little patience for people who choose to have low self-esteem

edit - let me just qualify that by saying that there are certainly things that happen to people that can cause them to have low self-esteem that are completely out of their control. but there are ways to improve your situation and if you obstinately refuse to do that then all patience goes out the window.

or

I won't presume to know the intricacies of RNH mental health but from what I can gather no significant trauma has actually taken place. I could be wrong, but essentially what I can gather is that he is lonely and wants to get laid. This issue doesn't warrant the amount of stress/anxiety that is being conveyed almost daily. I understand that it can be annoying to not be getting any action but it shouldn't weigh THIS heavy on someone.

basically what I see is this:

RNH: "----problem....."

fakegaf: "solution"

RNH: "excuse"

ad nauseum

it gets tiresome

This will be my only post on this because I really don't want to get into a discussion about it but if you seriously can't see how that isn't saying it's not legitimate then...yeah

Spoiler

And just for the record I don't even care about sex that much, which I've definitely mentioned a few times now

 

[Numb]

Jin's 3D Glasses got me dying

love how him and Kaz are dressed for the occasion

--

Time to sleep finally.
Night folks

 

[Misha]

I get where you're coming from and I would actually rather have a short text priming the pump for any biggish thing. Like, that way I can get my mind right pre-in person talk.

But generally it's accepted to not do news like that via text.

I say do it and see what happens.

Exactly!

I'm gonna do it with a different friend and see how that turns out

Most of the time tho the reason why it's not good to do news by text is cause it's something that arrests both of you but this is for my sake and not theirs so I don't consider that a problem(and who cares if other people do)

I guess I would question why it's important to come out. Is it just so that you get the right names/pronouns? Is there some way you expect to be treated differently/more appropriately? Do you need to stop feeling like you're hiding something? Do you need to try and find an ally who will support you through your transition?

I'm not trying to be obtuse. I just think it's important to know why you want to do something when it's something this important. It gives your mind some solid place to camp out at while you fumble for words to every explain, rather than being lost in some vortex of emotion.

If you need to have a prepared statement, that's fine, but this is something most people are going to have a lot of questions about. Remember that they haven't had years of dwelling on it like you have. They haven't spent months or more researching online. They haven't been following the legal cases with the same fervor to make sure you'll be alright in the future. They don't know all of the scientific reasons for all of it. And most importantly they don't know that you're sure about it. It's only natural for people to have questions at this stage of social progress, so if you come out to someone you're putting the onus on yourself to have the answers, or at least admit that you don't have the answers.

If you're going to do it by text then absolutely make sure they know you're open to talking about it in person, and absolutely be ready to do so when you next meet up.

Just so I don't have to hide in my room and stuff. The other stuff is cool too but not an immediate issue

 

[Ceallach]

Tbf that was my initial plan before I was convinced it would be worth making clear before moving in

It would need to be verbalized eventually but I guess if I lived with them then I'd be much happier doing it fade to face then (or at least it being super weird to text it to someone five feet away would make that the only option )

Are you FTM? Wanna be my boyfriend?

Spoiler

trying to bring some levity

 

[Misha]

Are you FTM? Wanna be my boyfriend?

Spoiler

trying to bring some levity

No. I wouldn't post in girlgaf if that was the case

But I guess that's a good thing that it's ambiguous? Idk

 

[RobotNinjaHornets]

Thx Fiction for tagging marrec on Facebook THE CIRCLE EXPANDS

 

[trab pu kcip]

Thx Fiction for tagging marrec on Facebook THE CIRCLE EXPANDS

:0
post his shirtless pics.


also do you know this?

 

[RobotNinjaHornets]

:0
post his shirtless pics.


also do you know this?

You should hang out in EmoGAF more

And he hasn't accepted yet :c

The circle will expand soon

EDIT: Lol I just scrolled further in that page and saw this

I don't know why that picture is amusing me as much as it is

Spoiler

For those that don't know, that's the singer of Tiny Moving Parts

 

[zeemumu]

I only have a few of you added on Facebook. Em, Lucian, Windam, and Badger I think.

 

[trab pu kcip]

You should hang out in EmoGAF more

And he hasn't accepted yet :c

The circle will expand soon

oh haha well at least that means we both liked it! and apparently follow every move Blake does.

 

[FloatOn]

This will be my only post on this because I really don't want to get into a discussion about it but if you seriously can't see how that isn't saying it's not legitimate then...yeah

Spoiler

And just for the record I don't even care about sex that much, which I've definitely mentioned a few times now

pretty selective dude

I also said

I don't think you are giving human beings enough credit. We have higher thinking. We are not just creatures of instinct. People are able to reason and systematically address things either through the aide of a therapist or a self-help book or just coming to things independently.

The only way we get better is to choose to get better. Your friends can't do it for you.

If this anxiety/stress is some kind of chemical imbalance that is making RNH feel this way I'll certainly have more empathy. But if that is the case, putting off the doctor is even more offensive.

yeah that's cool and I hope the progress continues. but him putting off the doctor. something that would absolutely help for some kind of excuse was infuriating.

my older brother is bipolar and made all sorts of excuses and put my family through hell before he got any medical help.

RNH refusal to seek help struck a pretty personal nerve and I'm sorry for coming off like an ass.

 

[marrec]

Welp, my job just got significantly harder, they laid off the only other guy who does any decent troubleshooting and works with the union much more closely than I do.

Now I gotta do my job AND his job. Employee review is coming up though. I'll be like "just give me half his pay and I'll stay".

I thought the dude was going to get violent but was able to talk him down.

That doesn't mean he won't come back and get violent though. Yaaaaay. He's goodish people for the most part but very volatile.

Which might be why they laid him off lol

 

[Granadier]

Welp, my job just got significantly harder, they laid off the only other guy who does any decent troubleshooting and works with the union much more closely than I do.

Now I gotta do my job AND his job. Employee review is coming up though. I'll be like "just give me half his pay and I'll stay".

I thought the dude was going to get violent but was able to talk him down.

That doesn't mean he won't come back and get violent though. Yaaaaay. He's goodish people for the most part but very volatile.

Which might be why they laid him off lol

This would be my approach as well. Increased workload should always comes with increased pay if the company values you as an employee. At least in my opinion.

 

[Misha]

This would be my approach as well. Increased workload should always comes with increased pay if the company values you as an employee. At least in my opinion.

Yes. Different responsibilities = different position and since they're just giving you more responsibilities that means they're promoting you

 

[FloatOn]

Welp, my job just got significantly harder, they laid off the only other guy who does any decent troubleshooting and works with the union much more closely than I do.

Now I gotta do my job AND his job. Employee review is coming up though. I'll be like "just give me half his pay and I'll stay".

I thought the dude was going to get violent but was able to talk him down.

That doesn't mean he won't come back and get violent though. Yaaaaay. He's goodish people for the most part but very volatile.

Which might be why they laid him off lol

sucks. I've had to juggle multiple roles at once before and it's not fun

 

[Ceallach]

Update: whoever had this ps3 before fucking LOADED it with Asian porn. There are only local accounts, it's on a pretty old fw. But yeah lots of pornography and mp3s with bad id3 tags

 

[RobotNinjaHornets]

I only have a few of you added on Facebook. Em, Lucian, Windam, and Badger I think.

I went to look for you via Badger's friends but saw something else

Who remembers that video of him doing Wazzy's makeup

oh haha well at least that means we both liked it! and apparently follow every move Blake does.

Man, it's a super good cover. Covers like that aren't usually my thing but she does a good job

And lol, isn't it Adam who does the Facebook though?

Spoiler

Either way Blake is still rad as heck

 

[A Fish Aficionado]

Update: whoever had this ps3 before fucking LOADED it with Asian porn. There are only local accounts, it's on a pretty old fw. But yeah lots of pornography and mp3s with bad id3 tags

must've been a gaffer

 

[WhereAreMahDragonz]

SO BADASS!!!!!!!

she's the only thing that's redeeming this episode

um she's the only redeeming thing in the entirety of season 3

 

[marrec]

Update: whoever had this ps3 before fucking LOADED it with Asian porn. There are only local accounts, it's on a pretty old fw. But yeah lots of pornography and mp3s with bad id3 tags

THAT IS OFFENSIVE

bad id3 tags should be illegal

sucks. I've had to juggle multiple roles at once before and it's not fun

Dude is not here a lot anyway so I'm used to picking up his slack for weeks at a time. Now I just gotta do it more.

 

[trab pu kcip]

I went to look for you via Badger's friends but saw something else

Who remembers that video of him doing Wazzy's makeup



Man, it's a super good cover. Covers like that aren't usually my thing but she does a good job

And lol, isn't it Adam who does the Facebook though?

Spoiler

Either way Blake is still rad as heck

I somehow had in mind that Blake posted it but I could've been mistaken. probably so if Adam handles all the fb stuff.

yeah especially jawbreaker covers are tricky, I don't genreally like them.

 

[zeemumu]

I somehow had in mind that Blake posted it but I could've been mistaken. probably so if Adam handles all the fb stuff.

yeah especially jawbreaker covers are tricky, I don't genreally like them.

trab you should add me.

 

[WhereAreMahDragonz]

 

[trab pu kcip]

trab you should add me.

lol I should?
I don't think I've seen your profile around tho

 

[zeemumu]

lol I should?
I don't think I've seen your profile around tho

I'm in Em's friend list somewhere.

 

[trab pu kcip]

I'm in Em's friend list somewhere.

well that's specific ;p just drop me your full name

 

[zeemumu]

well that's specific ;p just drop me your full name

PM'd

 

[WhereAreMahDragonz]

The brightness of the sun, will give me just enough
To bury my love, in the moondust
I long to hear your voice, but still I make the choice
To bury my love, in the moondust

 

[Ceallach]

Oh god. I don't know who owned this thing was the scummiest of all scumbags. Some of the choice cuts in this thing

Puddle of Mud Blurry
Drowning Pool Bodies
Kid Rock American Badass
Limp Bizkit Break Stuff
POD youth of the nation
Breaking Benjamin polyamorous
Linkin Park in the end

 

[marrec]

*looks at that playlist*

*asian porn*

*badly labeled MP3s*

I didn't know 13 y/o me owned a PS3 at one point!

 

[A Fish Aficionado]

Oh god. I don't know who owned this thing was the scummiest of all scumbags. Some of the choice cuts in this thing

Puddle of Mud Blurry
Drowning Pool Bodies
Kid Rock American Badass
Limp Bizkit Break Stuff
POD youth of the nation
Breaking Benjamin polyamorous
Linkin Park in the end

oh god.
gift that keeps on giving

 

[RobotNinjaHornets]

*assumes the person I just added was zeemumu*

Marrec accept me goddamnit

 

[trab pu kcip]

*assumes the person I just added was zeemumu*

Marrec accept me goddamnit

he'll just have to post the lewd pics directly in here.

 

[Symphonia]

Anyone here have a Hulu account they'd be willing to let me use?

 

[SystemBug]

wait you guys have all of each other on facebook?

 

[zeemumu]

*assumes the person I just added was zeemumu*

Marrec accept me goddamnit

Nope, wasn't me.

 

[RobotNinjaHornets]

wait you guys have all of each other on facebook?

Yeah, quote for a link to mine to start the madness

 

[Granadier]

Look at this dumb hat that doesn't fit my head but totally covers my wicked bed head today.

Time to figure out what I'm bringing to Boston.