I'm dying.
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Football Thread |OT18| Have you ever seen a Mackem punch a horse?
- Thread starter Hixx
- Start date
I'm dying.
Lambda Pie
Banned
Wilbury dark secret revealed
To his ass we're all drawn
Oh, if i didn't know better
I would say he's Elton John
A poem about Sporting
"Oh boy here we go"
The annual cycle
called the Benfica fan show
Benfica fans are a wild bunch
They love to scream and shout
But god forbid they lose
cause then all they do is pout
"Cardozo is the best,
we need to keep him in our kit"
They lose 1-0,
"Sell him, he's shit!"
You guys are undefeated,
well at least in the league.
But hey that's gotta count for something,
oh wait, its the Portuguese league
And thats the best it'll get for now.
Sviatoslav
Member
Stop speaking in rhymes
You fucking cunts!
I won't warn you again,
Not even once.
My wrath will be fierce,
If you don't obey.
So stop it right now,
Don't you dare and delay.
You may think it's a bluff
But Mumei owes me a favour.
So just try it again,
And your bannings I'll savour.
You fucking cunts!
I won't warn you again,
Not even once.
My wrath will be fierce,
If you don't obey.
So stop it right now,
Don't you dare and delay.
You may think it's a bluff
But Mumei owes me a favour.
So just try it again,
And your bannings I'll savour.
FootballFan
Member
:lololol I love that you rhymed league with league and that your team is also in that same league.
no italics = no sale
KidA Seven
Member
This is gold!
I love my Sporting but the Portuguese League is a real shit show.
no
janujez can get bent
This Spanish cunt is nothing more
Than a Clevgod wannabe
Suso can get bent
Along with Sterling and Shelvey
Broder Salsa
Banned
Lambda Pie
Banned
Sportinguistas attacking me
Like warriors in a wild hunt
I have another theory
It's just that time of the month
The green and white armada
Should i really feel nervous?
Last time i saw a real lion
He was jumping hoops in a circus
KidA Seven
Member
FootballFan
Member
Sviatoslav, shut it and build a bridge,
All you do is whine and rant.
Do it as much as you like kid,
Russian league will always be irrelevant.
"Zenit did this, zenit did that, your league is shit",
How about you take jeff's advice and eat a dick.
I am done with this poetry and your league,
Become timu and pretend you always supported PSG.
All you do is whine and rant.
Do it as much as you like kid,
Russian league will always be irrelevant.
"Zenit did this, zenit did that, your league is shit",
How about you take jeff's advice and eat a dick.
I am done with this poetry and your league,
Become timu and pretend you always supported PSG.
LFMartins86
Member
Sporting is already dead, or so you say
But last Sunday, the dead made you sweat
If it wasn´t for the man in yellow, we would have ruined your day
In the hell of the stadium of Luz, our boys were able to handle the heat
You bragged of your european win against Newcastle
But last year in the Europa we won against the Premiership champions
It was a tight fight with tension running high until the last whistle
In the end we showed the whole of Europe the might of the Lisbon Lions
Green is more know as the color of hope
And that´s what I see when I see our youth
They will stop our descent in this slippery slope
League and Cup, they will get us both
You hide your dickness as honesty
If that is what you prefer, that´s what I shall chant
I will end this poem in a way that it´s quite tasty
You´re a cunt, you´re a cunt, you´re a cunt.
But last Sunday, the dead made you sweat
If it wasn´t for the man in yellow, we would have ruined your day
In the hell of the stadium of Luz, our boys were able to handle the heat
You bragged of your european win against Newcastle
But last year in the Europa we won against the Premiership champions
It was a tight fight with tension running high until the last whistle
In the end we showed the whole of Europe the might of the Lisbon Lions
Green is more know as the color of hope
And that´s what I see when I see our youth
They will stop our descent in this slippery slope
League and Cup, they will get us both
You hide your dickness as honesty
If that is what you prefer, that´s what I shall chant
I will end this poem in a way that it´s quite tasty
You´re a cunt, you´re a cunt, you´re a cunt.
Lambda Pie
Banned
this is straight from Ethersville, damn.
"cunt" doesn't rhyme with "chant". actually that's an aberrant deviation of the narration we had going on. is it frustration that Sporting can't win, regardless of formation? they need to take the ball for spin, go all in, Benfica gave you a demonstration. used the knowledge we passed on to you, Sporting talks like the Wii but performs like the Wii U.
amazing
KidA Seven
Member
I've got to side with Sporting
FootballFan
Member
<3 Sviat, don't hurt me.
Oh snap!!
So Good...But not as good as Januzaj.
Play him against Arsenal. Fergie Pls.
This is amazing poetry, but the last line is golden! Cannot stop laughing!
LFMartins86
Member
After-Dark Footy Gaf has become Poetry Central. All we need now is some soft jazz and some fine scotch3
Another season to proclaim
That Suarez won't miss another game
That this year's finally your year
And Kenny won't touch another beer
Adnan will score a brace or three
At Anfield in January
And Brentan will find the nearest tree
And drape a rope over its leaves
And finally he will proceed
To talk a lot of shit
Lambda Pie
Banned
i would like to think my legacy in this forum was improving Football GAF rhyming skills and make "get bent" a popular expression. i can die (or get perma banned) happy now.
KidA Seven
Member
LFMartins86
Member
It auto-corrected from chaunt, which is a valid variation of chant.
I'll try, but its first time so be gentle:
Everton, I love you, I say. Everton!
We are good and fun, because of Moyes
They said, until we collapse under a a ton
of pressure, because of no other than Moyes
I then get depressed, I watch Hamburg and Son
then I hope, just to be downed by Moyes
Then I keep watching Inui and Bender(s), Everton?
Nope, still shit. Fuck it, I am watching Reus
Damn that was bad :/
Everton, I love you, I say. Everton!
We are good and fun, because of Moyes
They said, until we collapse under a a ton
of pressure, because of no other than Moyes
I then get depressed, I watch Hamburg and Son
then I hope, just to be downed by Moyes
Then I keep watching Inui and Bender(s), Everton?
Nope, still shit. Fuck it, I am watching Reus
Damn that was bad :/
KidA Seven
Member
Fuck me
Holy shit this is amazing :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol :lol
Yenrot can't believe the stonk on he's about to get
Sviatoslav
Member
That's quite funny coming from you
You're as plastic a fan as I've ever seen
You live in fucking New Zealand
Yet support the Barca machine
Your glory hunting ways are transparent
You sheep-fucker cunt
Go home, you're drunk
Stop pulling this stunt
You post about Real Madrid
More than "your" own team
Complaining about what they did
While pretending Barca is clean
Please stop it already
This is the last straw
Don't even try to respond
Or next time I'll go in raw
Old trafford, the waste land; Ode to Wilbury, by Bud23
April is the cruelest month,
.................................
What are the roots that clutch, what cunts grow
Out of this stony rubbish? Son of a bitch,
You cannot say, or guess, for you know only
A heap of broken trolls, where the Wilb´s sperm beats,
And the dead tree gives no shelter, the cricket no relief,
And the dry stone no sound of water. Only
There is shadow under this beautiful monkey #,
(Come in under the shadow of this red ass),
And I will show you something different from either
Your dick at morning striding behind Pulga´s mother
Or your dick at evening rising to meet her;
I will show you fear in a handful of cunts.
# (Wilbury´s avatar )
April is the cruelest month,
.................................
What are the roots that clutch, what cunts grow
Out of this stony rubbish? Son of a bitch,
You cannot say, or guess, for you know only
A heap of broken trolls, where the Wilb´s sperm beats,
And the dead tree gives no shelter, the cricket no relief,
And the dry stone no sound of water. Only
There is shadow under this beautiful monkey #,
(Come in under the shadow of this red ass),
And I will show you something different from either
Your dick at morning striding behind Pulga´s mother
Or your dick at evening rising to meet her;
I will show you fear in a handful of cunts.
# (Wilbury´s avatar )
Only for him, only for him!
FootballFan
Member
Depends on the accent really. Chant in nz is pronounced Chunt lol.
Bayern scored four, we got nada,
I'm still here chanting remuntada.
I believe in the power of tikitaka,
let's hope the ref helps us, that motherfucka.
Thanks to Dortmund, the pain has been eased,
But until the final whistle, I still won't be pleased.
Who would be able to handle all the "la decima" crap,
I'd rather spend a day with G-Unit, than hear that.
FootballFan
Member
I think Kenny would prefer wine
As for Suarez he will be fine
He's a family man why can't you see
Not like that hooligan in France, Joey
Next season we'll have a title push
So just sit down your smooth little toosh
And watch how Joe Allen's footwork is tight
You'll cry into a pillow, but it'll feel so right
Just breathe it in and say it out loud
14 is Liverpool's year and I'm proud
And if I hear you say "Carrick"
Well you sir can eat a dick.
LFMartins86
Member
Perfection.
KidA Seven
Member
OH shittttt
Alright enough of this shit. Let's talk about a strategy to reunite Ilkay and Shinji.
I propose Shinji presenting Ilkay a case full of money (37 million), with his dick inside the case.
Lambda Pie
Banned
holy shit... take my sword.
You are quickly becoming my favourite poet.
But We are still above Liverpool with their reds
We still smile about it because that is the only hope that is left
and enjoy Luis ''John Terry + 1'' Suarez and his problem with feds
Because of Kenny's ghost still lingers and that's what they want to get
Bent, Get
The arrogant Newcastle is down there as well, with Stoke
Fighting against the bushes of watery condition with Wigan
Sunderland went up to crease the nipples' table with coke
which causes these teams fight against the manustration
We still smile about it because that is the only hope that is left
and enjoy Luis ''John Terry + 1'' Suarez and his problem with feds
Because of Kenny's ghost still lingers and that's what they want to get
Bent, Get
The arrogant Newcastle is down there as well, with Stoke
Fighting against the bushes of watery condition with Wigan
Sunderland went up to crease the nipples' table with coke
which causes these teams fight against the manustration
Sviatoslav
Member
<3 <3 <3 right back at you. Am I the only one who wants to see a plastered Andres try his hand at poetry?
LFMartins86
Member
That should be entertaining.
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