Hot Coldman
Banned
Still waiting for that C-SPEC game.
-
Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
Giant Bomb #13 | good and faithful friends ahead
- Thread starter Jimmyfenix
- Start date
- Status
Jeevesmeister
Banned
You people are monsters. That game is like six or eight people all took a shit on a plate and then continually sneer and give you middle fingers as you chow down on said mountain of shit. Everything in that game is bad. Everything. I can tell you this because I spent about 75 hours trying to just understand exactly why people fucking adored that game, so far as to claim it "Game of the Year."
-The core fucking villain is completely ineffective and effortlessly thwarted by the protagionist at every turn. Divinity: Original Sin is a prime example of how to build up a villain that actually matters and has some power in the world.
-The inventory system is a cluttered mess and the loot scaling is a hilariously pathetic ripoff of Diablo 3/WoW design. Notice how everyone's forgotten about Diablo 3.
-What the fuck was the point of mounts and why were there so many of them considering how slow you walk through the world and how minimally faster mounts are.
-The crafting system is the worst example of UX design I've ever seen - its a bunch of tables thrown together between Skyhold and the keeps that just open fucking menus - no animations, not even trying - just menus. There's no noticable difference between crafting a useless piece of junk and some ridiculous god-tier gamebreaking armor or daggers.
-The combat mechanics are the most poorly thought out fucking nightmare hybrid between a bad single-player MMO and a wannabe Dragon's Dogma without any of what made Dragon's Dogma fucking amazing. The Final Fantasy XV demo shows how to actually innovate and make that style of combat mechanics interesting and entertaining.
-You know what was the worst part of The Old Republic? All the hours you would spend running through mostly empty corridors. You know what's a great deal of Dragon Age Inquisition? Running through mostly empty corridors of impossible terrain. The FFXV demo is a prime example of how to do giant areas well that aren't depressingly surrealist sloughfests.
-All the side characters are bad. All of them. The Iron Bull everyone keeps hyping up? That horseshit Whedon-esque "man isn't violence cool! I'm gonna jerk off later to slitting this dragon's throat! WoooaaaahhHHHoohh aren't I edgy?!?!" is total horseshit. Worse yet is one character appropriating social justice rethoric "oh, punching down arsehole" then saying some horribly transphobic bullshit just a few hours later, because Bioware doesn't actually care about these issues, they've just found a niche demographic to cater to without compromising their bottom line. Every Dragon Age has had some gross ass transphobic shit in it in one form or another and they've never shown any desire to improve.
-How about that completely fucking pointless War Table horseshit where you had to jump in through like, 3 fucking load screens just to get to it, even though you're the head of a military organization with magical capabilties and can't you just send a fucking raven since a great deal of the game is aping Game of Thrones and other generic fantasy bullshit?
-Waiting around in real time for companion missions to complete, yeah, that uh, totally makes sense, and the payoffs were totally worth it. Ye.. no. This was terrible as well.
-The utterly pointless appropriation of Renaissance inspired imagery without any of the cultural context it was born in or the actually interesting components of it - i.e. check out Marie Antoinette's ridiculous hairdos towards the end of her reign.
-Clicking in the left stick to "search" was totally rad and a satisfying mec- wait, no it wasn't. It was fucking terrible spamming L3 everywhere you went.
-Did I forget to mention the pathetically implemented "power" mechanic which is nothing but a boring, unoriginal gatekeeping mechanic to force you to slog through shitty side content?
-The hundreds upon hundreds if not fucking thousands of mindless fucking collectibles which all use the same fucking infuriating animation to pick them up which in the end amount to fucking nothing of value because the game scales to how many mindless hours you're willing to dump into the game - there's people dragging about dumping 150 hours into the game, and all I can say is - why? Why the fuck would you? Of all the RPGs out there, of all the actually interesting games with convincing stories and characters and mechanics that are engaging and challenging, why waste your fucking time with this utterly mindless, periless, sloughfest single-player MMO?
Dragon Age Inqusition is one of the worst games ever made. No, its not a Big Rig Truckers, but that's one weird Russian guy in a basement. This was a massive multi-million dollar production with hundreds of hands at the helm and a just as large marketing budget, that manages to outright fucking fail at everything it attempts to achieve. Sure, maybe the Royal Palace was a neat sequence, I'll give it that, but nothing in that game is good. Not a fucking thing, and if you honestly like it, there is a laundry list of RPGs you need to play to break out of this cave you're trapped in.
Divinity Original Sin, Pillars of Eternity, Dragon's Dogma, Shadowrun Returns - all three of those are vastly superior RPGs and that's just off the top of my head. There is not a single fucking critical argument that can be made in Inquisition's defense, sorry. It's undeniably awful considering the entire history of the medium and every innovation in the RPG field in the past decade.
But no, go ahead, go back to spending 150 hours collecting 30 different rocks to make shiny armor, because, you know, that's what the leader of a massive military Inquisition force is doing when the world's in peril. Fetch quests. Yeah. Right.
Freedom = $1.05
Banned
except for skyrim.
Wasn't the alternative Saints Row 3? Skyrim so hard it hurts, if that's the choice we're given.
Okie dokie.
I still really like the game. I long ago learned that I don't need others to validate my choices of the games I like.
Freedom = $1.05
Banned
skyrim was still broken on the PS3 and was a technical mess even on the 360 for a while. didn't deserve it just on that alone
Yeah, but you could also just play it on the PC because what are you some sort of savage this is an Elder Scrolls game.
I don't think Skyrim was the best game released that year, it's just a lot less not the best game than Saint's Row 3 was.
Hot Coldman
Banned
IDK, Skyrim seemed like it was made by robots. Saints Row was very clearly made by humans, warts and all. I would root for it based on that alone.
2011 GOTY is Super Mario 3D Land with a fucking bullet.
EDIT: wait no it's Deus Ex, what am I talking about
or it's Portal 2
nckillthegrimace
Member
DA:I is so bad. It's like no one said no to anything ever. Three of the ten or so major areas are deserts. Why. Please learn to cut things.
Jeff didn't cotton to RDR, and he was much more steadfast and unyielding in his contrary arguments back then. Brad's filibuster is strong, but Jeff was like a wall.
I'm still surprised Jeff just backed down with The Last of Us taking the top spot back in 2013. But that was a difficult year.
Hot Coldman
Banned
wait no, it's Ghost Trick
Ghost Trick is the best game of 2011
Ghost Trick is the best game of 2011
What else was there? 2013 was not exactly a banner year for the gaming industry.
Hot Coldman
Banned
Link Between Worlds.
Jeevesmeister
Banned
Considering the game treats you like a soulless child at every turn I can't say I'm surprised by this response.
It actually was in a lot of ways. Dungeons were largely computer generated.
It's the most appropriate response. You can rant all you want, but I like the game and I don't really see that changing because of what somebody says on the internet.
At the same time, you're totally entitled to your opinion. Hate the game all you want, I have zero problem with that. Honestly, the only reason I changed your quote to "angry ranting" is because it was a huge block of text, and I didn't want to create clutter.
If you really wanted a debate on the merits of the game, it's not really something I'm interested in engaging in at the moment. Regardless, this is not the appropriate venue for doing so.
Thus, the most appropriate response to all that is simply this: Okie dokie.
I think Jeff was really into GTAV and Bioshock Infinite. I remember he fought pretty hard for Infinite during GOTY voting.
Jeevesmeister
Banned
Dude, you're the one who came on to a discussion board, said "hey some of us actually like Inquisition," and then when challenged on said statement said "okie dokie." If you can't handle discussion on a discussion board then don't act like a child about it.
stump sock
Member
I couldn't be more pleased that DMX is the thumbnail
e: oh shit there's an old games show tomorrow night
See my edited post.
This is also the Giant Bomb thread, not the Dragon Age Inquisition thread.
I already managed to get this thread sidetracked onto Mass Effect, I see little need for it to get sidetracked onto Dragon Age.
If I really wanted to debate the merits of Dragon Age I'd do so in threads devoted to Dragon Age. I don't wish to do so, so I'm not really in those threads.
The whole reason this even came up was because somebody implied that the entire Mass Effect thread will be disappointed with ME4 because they felt that DA:I was terrible. I simply corrected him to say that some of us liked DA:I. I'm not sure why that needs to be further delved into.
I probably shouldn't have been quite so flippant with that second reply, but I immediately edited in with more nuance. All the same, I'm sorry that you seem so offended that I happened to like a game. That's not going to change.
nckillthegrimace
Member
DID SOMEBODY SAY A LINK BETWEEN WORLDS
Anyway, Wonderful 101, Metal Gear Rising, Phoenix Wright 5, Attack of the Friday Monsters, Etrian Odyssey IV...
Cool people games!
Hot Coldman
Banned
You didn't say Bioshock or GTAV so I'll let you have this one.
should be dmx goomba
stump sock
Member
you're, right, I could have been more pleased
Fantastapotamus
Wrong about commas, wrong about everything
I really laughed hard when it was revealed that the villain of the game is
a guy you already killed in a DLC for Dragon Age 2
Anyway, DA:I is better than DA 2 but still a really bad game.
Why is this discussion happening again?
nckillthegrimace
Member
BI was very disappointing. I feel like they advertised a much more interactive game than they made; almost all interactions in the final game involve shooting cartoon racists. Also, the game didn't have much of anything interesting to say about turn of the century America. The only stand out was the brutal swing taken at Henry Ford's ethically dubious obsession with efficiency in the factory level, but other stuff, like the racial conflict, was embarrassingly bad.
GTAIV was so cosmically terrible that I refuse to play GTA games.
StopMakingSense
Member
It's the finest killing draugr while solving 3 puzzles in a cave simulator money can buy.
These are all anime games though.
Jimmyfenix
Member
I will take DA:I discussion over Monster Hunter discussion anyday
A lot of sidequests were but I'm pretty sure all dungeons were handmade, which kinda makes it worse.
nckillthegrimace
Member
welcome to giant bomb
I'm a weird one since my 2011 GOTY would probably be either inFamous 2 or Uncharted 3.
At least those are the games I remember playing day 1 that I enjoyed the most that year. I played games like Skyrim and Saints like a couple years later. I'm pretty bad at playing games the year they come out, besides for a few that I get day 1 that I know I'll probably love.
At least those are the games I remember playing day 1 that I enjoyed the most that year. I played games like Skyrim and Saints like a couple years later. I'm pretty bad at playing games the year they come out, besides for a few that I get day 1 that I know I'll probably love.
BreezyLimbo
Banned
Man Jeff just DESTROYS Brad and Dan at how bad they're at Bloodborne.
Jeff:"You just dodge things and hit them"
Jeff:"You just dodge things and hit them"
Hot Coldman
Banned
um, excuse me, but W101 is tokusatsu
That's Bioshock for you.
In hindsight, Bioshock 1 isn't exactly better about that stuff. All the philosophical issues, the whole Ayn Rand objectivism stuff... were merely paper-thin window dressing. The game never really had anything interesting to say about it. It doesn't even have a stance. Just like the racial issues in Infinite.
Jeevesmeister
Banned
As I recall the dungeons/caves whatever were computer generated then humans went in to touch them up, but maybe I'm misremembering, I dunno. God, was Dragon's Dogma a breath of fresh air after suffering through Skyrim one lonely winter.
Okay, fine. But here's the thing: Every Bioware game after Mass Effect 2 has been goddamn terrible. Dragon Age 2 was a nightmare, The Old Republic was an undeniable failure of massive proportions, Mass Effect 3 was a bloated incoherent mess that came crashing down as the writer self-inserted themselves in the final moments to give the player the finger as an "artistic vision," and with Inquisition they only doubled down on the very worst of DA2, ME3 and TOR combined.
Bioware's done. There's no hope of them ever getting better after years and years of mind numbing failure rewarded with critical and financial success, and if they didn't have the massive war coffers of EA backing them they'd have been written off by now, but instead games writers treat AAA with this bizarre sense of legitimacy that chokes out lesser known developers with far smaller advertising budgets doing far more interesting work.
Now that I think of it, all of GB's endurance runs have been on anime games.
Power Rangers is pretty cool.
Jimmyfenix
Member
Brett is good at games. Always has been
He is the greatest video games man of all time
Fantastapotamus
Wrong about commas, wrong about everything
I wouldn't call Deadly Premonition an anime game.
shadyspace
Banned
Deadly Premonition is anime Twin Peaks.
Jimmyfenix
Member
I think MKX will be a fine game
But fuck region locking MP
I do not understand how this is a thing in 2015
But fuck region locking MP
I do not understand how this is a thing in 2015
Fantastapotamus
Wrong about commas, wrong about everything
- Status