Atramental
Banned
Prologue said:
What's really keeping you from asking her out now?
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Girl/Dating Age Part 2: A combined effort to give advice for those in need
- Thread starter -PXG-
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What's really keeping you from asking her out now?
Atramental said:
I want to but since I'm in two of her classes (only a handful of people), I thought it would be best to wait until the last few days of the semester to avoid any potential awkardness . Or am I just over thinking? As I said, I haven't really gained interest in a class mate before and most of my experiences have been with friends or friend of a friend.
CherryWoodFuton
Member
Grab your balls and just ask. If she says no harrisonfordwhogiveashit.gifPrologue said:
Bucket-o-roadkill
Member
Thirteen said:
oh yea, Im sick to death of this moron to be honest. he's only doing it because he never meets any girls himself so latches on to girls i get friendly with. the worst thing about him is he lies about previous conquests (yeah, that guy). Im sick of his bullshit about how he's gone off with some girl the other day when i know its made up. hell, half the time he's scared to talk to the mcdonalds clerk on his own but it doesn't stop him rubbing my face in some fantasy conquest he thought up last week.
he never wants to go out to clubs or pubs, he just likes driving around or some shit. i know Im venting but Im pissed off with the time I've wasted hanging round with this jerk. Im meeting some other friends Tuesday night so that will be a nice change. Its refreshing to see guys in here so uplifted and optimistic about changes they've made in their life, think its time i did the same! Starting by getting rid of the dead weight wimp.
luckyboyceo
Member
So I'm starting to think that my group of friends is holding me back from meeting potential women. Anyone have any experience with this issue? If so, how did you handle it?
Who cares if it's awkward if you fail? The longer you wait, the less confident you seem in yourself.Prologue said:
Don't make it one of those situations where she says "I used to have such a crush on you!" Those suck because it means you had a shot and you didn't even know it -- because you waited to long. I'm no expert psychologist, but I'm pretty sure that when women say that to you, they don't see you as a viable option anymore; they'd never do something so obvious as admit attraction if it were still there.
You start hanging out with different people. You don't have to make friends to replace them unless you want to. If you still like this group of people, just get outside of your usual comfort zone and add some new friends into your entourage. Your friends can definitely make a difference in your life.luckyboyceo said:
It sounds douchebaggish, but I'm a way better person now because I keep positive, motivated company. I left behind the slackers, punks, and junkies I used to hang around with in the first 18-something years of my life and I'm way better off for it. They were doing nothing for me but wasting my Friday and Saturday nights drinking in one another's basement and/or getting high all the time. Now I work a job where I meet tonnes of great people all because I my current roommate wanted me to work with him.
Ask yourself what you want from your body. I know that sounds lame, but really. Personal fitness should be about the benefits like improved health and goal setting, if you ask me. The fringe benefits like looking better are just bonuses, IMO.Kad5 said:
I personally don't think you being skinny-toned is a big deal. I've seen overweight dudes get girls and I've seen skinny dudes get girls with thicker thighs/arms than them. You can be jacked to high hell, but if you can't talk to a girl, you're not getting anywhere. Of course, meeting your own fitness goals can help you become more confident in yourself if that's what you feel is missing.
Again, ask yourself and do some soul-searching about your body image.
luckyboyceo said:
Assuming this is a real question and not a bad joke/troll...this one is easy to fix. Just find a new group to hang out with. If you're like most of GAF, you're in college, so just look around campus for new groups advertising for members. And for the love of god don't join any group that is mainly nerd guys, i.e. Magic: The Gathering or My Little Pony or whatever.
Find something that girls actually are interested in, like (some) political groups or music or sports.
HappyBivouac
Member
you ever been at the point where you you pursue/have sex with girls who, despite how beautiful they might be, you don't feel anything for them aside from short-lived lust and it is all a subconscious effort just to take your mind off of this one amazing person you are absolutely crazy about?
yeah, this might as well be in the drunk thread
yeah, this might as well be in the drunk thread
Kad5 said:
I used to be skinny and people would comment on it. I'll be honest one of the reasons I started lifting was to impress. I wanted to be that guy the girls would say "WOW look at him" when they saw me. I was around 20 or so and I could still eat anything I wanted, but couldn't gain a pound. No matter how hard I worked out or ate like a pig.
Finally around the age of 25 or so my metabolism slowed down and I actually started getting a gut. Mostly due to the fact that I graduated school and had a desk job. I got lazy as shit, but I got my act together. With the slow down in my metabolism and working out again my body filled out really well. My shoulders are very broad and my chest is more defined.
I do weights, but nothing too heavy. I'd rather stay within reason of my body frame. I also put in some cardio work. Mostly 5/10k's. I'd say if I could have any body type I wanted I would like to look like Ryan Reynolds.
After a while working out just became routine and I didn't really care about what others thought of my body. I started wearing better fitting close and started getting more compliments. Even yesterday at work I had a tight flannel shirt on and this women who always seems to flirt with me said something about it. She said said that she loved my shirt and wanted to buy her husband some shirts like it, but his body frame doesn't fit it very well. I'd smash the shit out of her too if she wasn't married.
Anyway back to you. I would say give weight lifting a shot. Once you start seeing results you will start to feel that confidence boost kick in. Women do notice a good body. They just don't make it as obvious as most guys do when it comes to women. lol Good luck!
Snakeyes said:
Yes, listen to this man. You'll never get the perfect pitch. If you wait forever to make your move, things will cool off.
You see a chance, you swing, and if you miss, move on. Don't get hung up on one girl as the only one you could ever be with or EVER ask out (like a lot of insecure guys seem to do).
So how do you deal with dating multiple women and sex. Wouldn't ever be an issue if it weren't for online dating (still may not be...but I'm in relatively new territory, so I may as well ask). So you're dating a few girls and you wind up sleeping with one...do you call it quits with the others? Given that most ppl online are dating multiple ppl, I'm not sure what the "rules" are.
Jamesfrom818
Banned
Decado said:
You shouldn't call it quits but you don't have to broadcast that you're fucking other girls either. If one of them asks, tell them the truth.
Call it quits when you feel that you're forming a genuine relationship with one of them.
CherryWoodFuton
Member
Having sex these days doesn't necessarily mean being committed. As long as you're honest with your intentions go ahead and keep on sexing lolDecado said:
luckyboyceo
Member
soultron said:
jaxword said:
Thanks guys. I'm meeting new people, it's just a work in progress. I'm at a new school this year so I'm still getting a feel for things, but that's the plan.
I definitely still enjoy my group of friends, that's not really the issue, I'm just starting to feel like they aren't really the ideal group to be around when trying to meet women, as douchebaggish as that sounds. They're great guys but many of them act relatively awkward around women and I feel like it sends off that awkward vibe for the whole group. I rarely ever meet anyone when I'm with them, and if I do it's some 30 something cougar that I have no interest in. Whereas when I hang out with different groups, women approach me much more often and they're actually women I have interest in. I haven't changed, just the people around me have. Just my observations.
As I said, I feel like a total douche for saying all this since it's my core group of friends, but it's becoming frustrating and I think it's time for a change. Thanks for the insight.
Atramental
Banned
I hope he's doing okay.
TheVampire
Banned
Where should I take this girl I went out with on last thursday for a second date?
We met up for dinner and chatted and that was it but she was keen to meet up again.
Not really keen on going to a pub or club.
Movies are kinda bad since you cant talk.
Coffee would be kinda redundant because the first dinner pretty much covered what a coffee date would of done and at the end after that kinda date I dont know how to escalate it into something else.
We met up for dinner and chatted and that was it but she was keen to meet up again.
Not really keen on going to a pub or club.
Movies are kinda bad since you cant talk.
Coffee would be kinda redundant because the first dinner pretty much covered what a coffee date would of done and at the end after that kinda date I dont know how to escalate it into something else.
DualShadow
Member
TheVampire said:
Try and do something where you can get some physical contact in to escalate things, like pool or bowling or something along those lines.
grap3fruitman
Banned
He accidentally a girl.Kad5 said:
The Elite
BOSS
Etrian Oddity
Member
Uh oh, haha. XDXun said:
Spend an afternoon at a nice park.TheVampire said:
Heh, this girl is getting out of hand xD I was talking to a friend of a friend last night who was in town visiting said friend. This other girl who is way too much into me must've seen us during the evening because she comes up doing that old children's rhyme "X and Y are sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g" in a jealousy attempt to cockblock me (I guess?). I mean, who does that? xD We're not even in an English speaking country, for that matter. I'm beginning to fear that making her hate me is the only way to get rid of her 
But I'm not a rude or mean person, which I think is why this shit keeps on happening.
But I'm not a rude or mean person, which I think is why this shit keeps on happening.Okay, I feel pretty stupid for posting this but whatever: I need your advise, GAF!
I was in Berlin for work over the weekend and didn't have much to do on Friday night, so I went to a club with a colleague of mine. After an hour or so, he got a call from his girlfriend and had to leave for some reason and I thought about leaving too when I notice this ridiculously cute girl at the bar who looks like she wants to get a drink. So I approach her and say:
"Hi, ich bin Sloane, darf ich Dir einen Drink anbieten?"
She looks at me in a weird way, I think she'll brush me off but:
"I'm sorry, I don't speak any German at all."
Turns out she's from England. Now, I usually don't have much problems talking to girls (I'm neither shy nor the smoothest guy you've ever met) but I'm not really used to talking or flirting in English. My written English isn't bad, I think, but I get to speak English like once a year, so I lack experience.
Anyway. This girl is fucking cute so I decide to try my best and if it doesn't work out, who gives a shit, right? I understand only half of what she says because the music is so loud and we honestly don't talk that much because I feel like I have to think about every sentence for five seconds before I can say it, but she's nice. We dance for half an hour, she makes a few nice remarks ("I like your smile." -- To which I ingeniously reply: "I like your smile, too.") and a few not so nice remarks ("You remind me of my best friend." :jnc) but overall it feels pretty decent despite the lack of talk. Problem is, she's here with a friend of hers (they were on vacation or something) who sits alone at a bar and looks miserable most of the time. She goes over to her every five minutes and, well, it's distracting.
After maybe an hour, she asks me if I've got Facebook but before I can get her full name, her friend drags her away, she apologizes but she has to leave because they've got to get the last train or something. For 30 seconds, I'm like: Okay, whatever. Then, I realize I really want to see to her again. I check if she's still there but, nope, she's already gone.
So, basically, all I know is this: She's cute. 20. Her first name. She's from England. Studies architecture in Manchester. Family lives in London. She's cute. Good job! Tried to find her on Facebook but since they've changed their search engine, it's almost impossible to find someone who isn't a friend of a friend.
Anyone got an idea how else I could find her? I mean, chances that this will ever lead to something are slim to none but I'd at least like to talk to her again. Stupid idea?
TL;DR: MET HOT GIRL CAN'T FIND HER!?!
I was in Berlin for work over the weekend and didn't have much to do on Friday night, so I went to a club with a colleague of mine. After an hour or so, he got a call from his girlfriend and had to leave for some reason and I thought about leaving too when I notice this ridiculously cute girl at the bar who looks like she wants to get a drink. So I approach her and say:
"Hi, ich bin Sloane, darf ich Dir einen Drink anbieten?"
She looks at me in a weird way, I think she'll brush me off but:
"I'm sorry, I don't speak any German at all."
Turns out she's from England. Now, I usually don't have much problems talking to girls (I'm neither shy nor the smoothest guy you've ever met) but I'm not really used to talking or flirting in English. My written English isn't bad, I think, but I get to speak English like once a year, so I lack experience.
Anyway. This girl is fucking cute so I decide to try my best and if it doesn't work out, who gives a shit, right? I understand only half of what she says because the music is so loud and we honestly don't talk that much because I feel like I have to think about every sentence for five seconds before I can say it, but she's nice. We dance for half an hour, she makes a few nice remarks ("I like your smile." -- To which I ingeniously reply: "I like your smile, too.") and a few not so nice remarks ("You remind me of my best friend." :jnc) but overall it feels pretty decent despite the lack of talk. Problem is, she's here with a friend of hers (they were on vacation or something) who sits alone at a bar and looks miserable most of the time. She goes over to her every five minutes and, well, it's distracting.
After maybe an hour, she asks me if I've got Facebook but before I can get her full name, her friend drags her away, she apologizes but she has to leave because they've got to get the last train or something. For 30 seconds, I'm like: Okay, whatever. Then, I realize I really want to see to her again. I check if she's still there but, nope, she's already gone.
So, basically, all I know is this: She's cute. 20. Her first name. She's from England. Studies architecture in Manchester. Family lives in London. She's cute. Good job! Tried to find her on Facebook but since they've changed their search engine, it's almost impossible to find someone who isn't a friend of a friend.
Anyone got an idea how else I could find her? I mean, chances that this will ever lead to something are slim to none but I'd at least like to talk to her again. Stupid idea?
TL;DR: MET HOT GIRL CAN'T FIND HER!?!
Come on, there's THREE smilies up there haha. That's nothing compared to my usual posts. I'm Swedish, yeah. English is second nature to us, sure, but still. I think I need to tell this girl to back off soon, or one day she'll try to cock up serious attempts on my part...-PXG- said:
CherryWoodFuton
Member
Take the loss homie......Sloane said:
No matter how much experience you have, it's always a good idea to practice. Hell, I stopped playing Gears for a couple of weeks. When I started playing again (thank you Alpha) I was rusty as hell. But now, my skills have returned and I'm back in business.
Anyway, you should (whenever appropriate) strike up a conversation. Don't bother the poor girl if she appears busy. This goes for customers or if she's an employee. Make it relevant to wherever you are and what you're doing. So if you're at a supermarket, ask what the best/ cheapest bread there is to buy, or whatever, and take it from there. Without even trying, you can get a girl's number, even if that wasn't your intent. It happened to me last night. Needless to say, it was a pleasant surprise.
Doing this will help you stay fresh or teach you how to stay calm and not get ahead of yourself. Treat women just as what they are...people. She's a ass normal person, just like you.
Anyway, you should (whenever appropriate) strike up a conversation. Don't bother the poor girl if she appears busy. This goes for customers or if she's an employee. Make it relevant to wherever you are and what you're doing. So if you're at a supermarket, ask what the best/ cheapest bread there is to buy, or whatever, and take it from there. Without even trying, you can get a girl's number, even if that wasn't your intent. It happened to me last night. Needless to say, it was a pleasant surprise.
Doing this will help you stay fresh or teach you how to stay calm and not get ahead of yourself. Treat women just as what they are...people. She's a ass normal person, just like you.
grap3fruitman
Banned
To be fair, no one really understood his situation and gave him shit advice.Blader5489 said:
Girl I had coffee with last week, the one date that took 2,5 hours? Having dinner with her this wednesday (at a restaurant). Texting still and still feeling her a lot. I have high hopes for this one, but we'll see what I can escalate this wednesday.
Still thinking about the third date... wanna do something special, possibly in the weekend. Maybe doing something active and then dinner at my place.
Still thinking about the third date... wanna do something special, possibly in the weekend. Maybe doing something active and then dinner at my place.
Jamesfrom818
Banned
#1 Lunch/dinner/drinksTheVampire said:
#2 Fun activity that you may have discussed during the first date
#3 Cook dinner and watch a movie at my place
That's my usual template.
The Shadow
Member
grap3fruitman said:
Telling someone that they need to fix themselves before they think of dating or relationships isn't shit advice, particularly in his case. His sense of entitlement and attitude in the thread didn't help either.
CoffeeJanitor
Member
SITUATION
pretty sure this grad student at the lab i work at is sort of into me. she is cute, but like 3-4 years older than me. me = sophomore, her = 1st or 2nd year grad student
1) does the age matter. i dont think it does. i have a bad habit of making excuses to not ask girls out because i get bad anxiety (aka i am a huge puss w/ girls) so i dont want to do that right now. i used to be better with girls but some shit happened and i suck now
2) how do i approach the situation
THANKS GAF
pretty sure this grad student at the lab i work at is sort of into me. she is cute, but like 3-4 years older than me. me = sophomore, her = 1st or 2nd year grad student
1) does the age matter. i dont think it does. i have a bad habit of making excuses to not ask girls out because i get bad anxiety (aka i am a huge puss w/ girls) so i dont want to do that right now. i used to be better with girls but some shit happened and i suck now
2) how do i approach the situation
THANKS GAF
grap3fruitman
Banned
Yeah, not sure what Combine you're referring to here...The Shadow said:
soundahfekz
Member
grap3fruitman said:
You sent flowers to a woman you weren't with, hassled her about her interest in you, then chastised people because you feel they didn't predict your erratic behavior in advance.
I'm not sure you should be the one to make the assertion that people provided Combine with 'shit advice'.
CoffeeJanitor said:
1) you kinda answered your own question. it's preferential, that being said don't be too disappointed if it's an issue for her. I'm assuming this lab job isn't permanent for either of you?
2) How much contact do you have with her in a day? If it's not much then just ask her to join you on your lunch break (if you guys have the same one). If you see her all the time then I'd ask her to go out for drinks one night, mostly because if you ask her to join you for lunch she might not take it as a date.
CoffeeJanitor
Member
Nah, we're both done after this semester I thinkhyduK said:
I actually only see her 2-3x a week cause my schedule only allows me to be in for a short period in the morning. I will probs ask her out to lunch then cause i can't drink (legally) for another month
+1 on spacebar about dancing.don't pressure girls to dance with you. just relax and they come to you.my only unique advice is to listen to top 40. us nerds all know we don't really listen to the usual pop/hip hop/etc.etc. that knowledge will really help your rhythm. .................and dance central.
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