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[reilo]

Think I might make a thread. Unfortunately, I don't know where she lives. But after some investigating, I will!

Dude...

 

[SolKane]

Dude...

dang. I was just kidding anyway

 

[Darklord]

"Hey, I'm new to the area and I don't know many good places to go to for happy hour. Do you recommend anything? Oh, that place sounds awesome. I'll go check it out Friday after work, you should go with me."

I've always been told the guy should be the one to suggest the place. When they haven't I've seen it backfire. But I guess asking her to suggest a place she likes THEN asking to go with her just might work.

So I guessing with the comments, I shouldn't bother testing the water, just straight up ask?

 

[samus i am]

The other issue. I don't know that many places or people here. Basically, in a new city and only know some shit so far. Not really any of the must go to bars or anything like that. So sure, I could ask her directly like that but I'd be kinda stumped on where the fuck to go. I guess I could start looking.

You- Hey, I'm thinking about going out for Happy Hour this Friday. Are you interested in getting some drinks?

Her- Sure, I would love to relax after such a long week.

You- Great, know any good places?

Her- Let's go to the place on 10th street.

You- Great, see you there.

 

[reilo]

I've always been told the guy should be the one to suggest the place.

Pfffft.

When they haven't I've seen it backfire.

There's a difference between being indecisive and not knowing.

But I guess suggesting a place she like THEN asking to go with her just work.

So I guessing with the comments, I shouldn't bother testing the water, just straight up ask?

Just ask. If she doesn't want to go, she doesn't want to go. Move on.

 

[Dabookerman]

I don't know how it is anywhere else, but here in the UK, about 95% of the girls are pretty easy to guess what they're into just by looking at their profile.

It seems there are 3 categories.

-slags
-Travel obsessed socialites
-Pompous hipsters who love the french

I'm not even kidding here, why aren't there that many girls that have something interesting to say in their profiles? They all read the fucking same!

 

[reilo]

I don't know how it is anywhere else, but here in the UK, about 95% of the girls are pretty easy to guess what they're into just by looking at their profile.

It seems there are 3 categories.

-slags
-Travel obsessed socialites
-Pompous hipsters who love the french

I'm not even kidding here, why aren't there that many girls that have something interesting to say in their profiles? They all read the fucking same!

The point is to go out with them in person and find out what their interests are.

Don't use their online social network profiles as some searchable filter to find the right person for you.

 

[Dabookerman]

The point is to go out with them in person and find out what their interests are.

Don't use their online social network profiles as some searchable filter to find the right person for you.

Easier said than done. I don't have that much time to sample every girl I find at least mildly attractive. I pretty much find it a waste of time and money if I end up meeting someone I find dull within the first 5 minutes. And awkward.

It doesn't help that they're picky as well. Seems some like to use it as a way to fill up their facebook friends list hah!

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

How do you deal with your girlfriend flirting/hanging out with other guys? I mean obviously I'm fine with her having guy friends she hangs out with, but for some reason I can't control getting a little upset when I see her with other dudes.

I am married I don't give a crap if she has guy friends. I don't care if guys flirt with her in fact I enjoy it. Why? Because as reilo said I'm the one whose going home with her. I use to be very jealous when I was late teens, early 20s but that was before I gained some self esteem and confidence.

 

[Sanky Panky]

The other issue. I don't know that many places or people here. Basically, in a new city and only know some shit so far. Not really any of the must go to bars or anything like that. So sure, I could ask her directly like that but I'd be kinda stumped on where the fuck to go. I guess I could start looking.

I've been 3 weeks here in Raleigh without knowing anybody, and simply using OkC, all girls have given me some pointers on where to go. I'm done with moving and setting up the apt, so I'm ready to go out this weekend. I have my first date tonight at a really cool bar, and I have one set up for Saturday.

DO NOT BE SHY ABOUT ASKING FOR SUGGESTIONS to anyone you come in contact with (co-workers, people on the streets, online, etc etc. It's a good way to find out what people are into too.

 

[SpectreFire]

don't do the grind then

It's not like i have too many other options at this point right now. My work term wraps up December and I get to go back to school at the start of next year.

I'm definitely looking forward to talking some girls who aren't constantly inundated by dozens of men every week and have little to no intentions of really doing anything with them.

 

[Cubsfan23]

It's not like i have too many other options at this point right now.

All hot women want you

 

[Deified Data]

I am married I don't give a crap if she has guy friends. I don't care if guys flirt with her in fact I enjoy it. Why? Because as reilo said I'm the one whose going home with her. I use to be very jealous when I was late teens, early 20s but that was before I gained some self esteem and confidence.

Agreed - it's a self-esteem thing. I don't mind if my fiance tells me someone at work is flirting with her because a) if something was going on, she wouldn't have told me, and b) I'm the best guy around and don't leave her wanting. If you let the little shit bother you you'll never be content.

 

[SpectreFire]

All hot women want you

I meant more like avenues to meet people.

 

[ClovingWestbrook]

Agreed - it's a self-esteem thing. I don't mind if my fiance tells me someone at work is flirting with her because a) if something was going on, she wouldn't have told me, and b) I'm the best guy around and don't leave her wanting. If you let the little shit bother you you'll never be content.

Yep. And I am confident if I were actually forced to experience her cheating I'd feel differently, but if she did cheat, while it would be horrible and hurtful, there are millions of other women out there. I don't believe in soul mates or what have you. So perhaps that helps in not sweating or being concerned about cheating or flirting. But basically you can't worry about that, you have to live your life and be 'the man' so to speak.

 

[NIGHT-]

"gonna have to cancel cause of family issues". Oh man how often I get this excuse....

 

[~Kinggi~]

"gonna have to cancel cause of family issues". Oh man how often I get this excuse....

I like the 'I'm sick'.

 

[Eggo]

It's not like i have too many other options at this point right now. My work term wraps up December and I get to go back to school at the start of next year.

I'm definitely looking forward to talking some girls who aren't constantly inundated by dozens of men every week and have little to no intentions of really doing anything with them.

Do you see the negativity in your posts? If a fraction of that seeps out into your interaction with people, it's going to affect your results.

 

[SpectreFire]

Do you see the negativity in your posts? If a fraction of that seeps out into your interaction with people, it's going to affect your results.

It's as negative as saying it's raining again in Vancouver.

EDIT:
Also, I think a girl I'm supposed to see tonight is getting cold feet. Will confirm later.

 

[NIGHT-]

Ok gaf.. How do you reel them in when it comes to online dating? I get messages from beautiful girls and I get replies when I message them. But I just cant seem to keep there interest.. Which is odd cause I don't have the same problem when dating the old fashion way lol

 

[Dabookerman]

Ok gaf.. How do you reel them in when it comes to online dating? I get messages from beautiful girls and I get replies when I message them. But I just cant seem to keep there interest.. Which is odd cause I don't have the same problem when dating the old fashion way lol

Do you find they lose interest very quickly?

 

[NIGHT-]

Do you find they lose interest very quickly?

Yea I do... Which is odd cause they usually comment on me being attractive and what not.

 

[SpectreFire]

Ok gaf.. How do you reel them in when it comes to online dating? I get messages from beautiful girls and I get replies when I message them. But I just cant seem to keep there interest.. Which is odd cause I don't have the same problem when dating the old fashion way lol

I usually just try and jump into a date as soon as possible. It keeps it from getting too internet boring and gives you more stuff to talk about on the date.

As for the reasons why they sometimes lose interest quickly:

1) There's a lot of guys messaging them, maybe they found someone better.

2) Some aren't there actually looking to seriously date. They're just there to chat with people, etc.

3) Some of them are just plain attention whores. They're not there to meet anyone, just to validate themselves.

4) You're awfully boring, or at least to them.

Dating people you meet in real life is easier because:

1) You've already met in person and decided whether or not there's a click present there.

2) There isn't an absolute swarm of men vying for her attention.

3) Standards drop in real life. She isn't browsing through hundreds of suitable candidates.

 

[Dabookerman]

Yea I do... Which is odd cause they usually comment on me being attractive and what not.

Pfft, annoys me just the same. Especially the ones that message you first.. if you don't bother replying, then stop wasting peoples time.

Dating people you meet in real life is easier because:

1) You've already met in person and decided whether or not there's a click present there.

2) There isn't an absolute swarm of men vying for her attention.

3) Standards drop in real life. She isn't browsing through hundreds of suitable candidates.

Fact.

 

[kunonabi]

"gonna have to cancel cause of family issues". Oh man how often I get this excuse....

Better than the "I have to wash my hair" excuse or getting stood up.

 

[NIGHT-]

I usually just try and jump into a date as soon as possible. It keeps it from getting too internet boring and gives you more stuff to talk about on the date.

As for the reasons why they sometimes lose interest quickly:

1) There's a lot of guys messaging them, maybe they found someone better.

2) Some aren't there actually looking to seriously date. They're just there to chat with people, etc.

3) Some of them are just plain attention whores. They're not there to meet anyone, just to validate themselves.

4) You're awfully boring, or at least to them.

Dating people you meet in real life is easier because:

1) You've already met in person and decided whether or not there's a click present there.

2) There isn't an absolute swarm of men vying for her attention.

3) Standards drop in real life. She isn't browsing through hundreds of suitable candidates.

You know what... That makes perfect sense to me. Cause the extremely attractive girls that have messaged me are on the site everytime I get on.. I guess it's just a way for them to get more attention and what not

 

[TheVampire]

Hey guys I had a first date with a girl last night (dinner)
It was ok and for once she wasn’t short and fat like a few others I’ve met.
Maybe 6.5/10 for looks so not bad.
We like a lot of the same things and she is a big gamer and loves the resident evil series.

Anyway so we had the dinner and talked for a while and then called it a night because we both had to get up early for work in the morning.
No kiss or anything but I remembered about trying to make some physical contact so I grabbed her hand and felt it while commenting on her Halloween style painted fingernails so I guess that’s something.

Id like to go for a second date but I’m not sure what to do or where to take her.
Somewhere that ends or has an environment where we could at least kiss.
Like at the end of the night we walked back to our cars (parked close) and that was it.
It never seems like the right environment or moment for it.

 

[DualShadow]

Hey guys I had a first date with a girl last night (dinner)
It was ok and for once she wasn’t short and fat like a few others I’ve met.
Maybe 6.5/10 for looks so not bad.
We like a lot of the same things and she is a big gamer and loves the resident evil series.

Anyway so we had the dinner and talked for a while and then called it a night because we both had to get up early for work in the morning.
No kiss or anything but I remembered about trying to make some physical contact so I grabbed her hand and felt it while commenting on her Halloween style painted fingernails so I guess that’s something.

Id like to go for a second date but I’m not sure what to do or where to take her.
Somewhere that ends or has an environment where we could at least kiss.
Like at the end of the night we walked back to our cars (parked close) and that was it.
It never seems like the right environment or moment for it.

I've kissed a girl at the end of a first date in the carpark with our cars parked close together (total coincidence as well.) But the date was going pretty well by then, and I already had my arm around her.

 

[Aurora]

TheVampire, any time is the right time to kiss. As soon as you have a desire to kiss her, that's the right time. I even kissed a girl while we were walking to the toilet once. She was like "how awkward, what are you doing?" and I replied "shut up" and kissed her. She loved it.

Just be confident and go for the kiss. The more you think about finding the right time, the more awkward and unnatural the whole thing will be. Remember that she is thinking "when will he kiss me?", so just go for it!

 

[Bucket-o-roadkill]

"gonna have to cancel cause of family issues". Oh man how often I get this excuse....

Haha well I was hanging around with a girl around 18months ago who was the queen of TERRIBLE excuses. I mean seriously, it would have been less insulting if she just straight told me to my face i was an ugly fuck and to leave her alone.

so we met a few times and seemed to get on great. we were going to met up again when i get the dreaded cancellation text... the excuse was.. 'i couldn't sleep too well so Im too tired to come out.' fair enough, insomnias a bitch. seemed keen to reschedule, no big deal.

the next excuse a few days later was 'I watched a scary film, so i couldn't sleep very well because i kept thinking about it.' by this point Im thinking... wtf is this girl 12 or something.

the final straw is this legendary excuse though, 10/10 for sheer originality: 'Sorry, its my dogs birthday'. Haha obviously after that i never asked her out again.

as a side story to this girl, imagine my amusement when my supposedly best friend starts texting and trying to meet her. infact he's been trying to get in her pants ever since, the slimy little bastard. If it wasent for the fact he gets the same lame excuses i got id feel like slapping the taste out of his mouth. i think he's only trying to get with her because i failed (Yeah, not only do i have bad luck with women, i also have horrible excuses for friends. this guy still hasent got me a birthday present after i got him nfs shift 2 for his when it was pretty much brand new. what an asshole).

 

[Etrian Oddity]

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Was out on the town tonight, and basically had this girl DTF as soon as she saw me. Kept on grabbing my hand, caressing my face, etc; and then I got totally cockblocked by her two friends. So close to victory!
I'll take it as an ego booster, though. I'm moving on up...this year has been a tremendous transformation in my character and game.

 

[Thirteen]

best friend starts texting and trying to meet her. infact he's been trying to get in her pants ever since, the slimy little bastard.

wow nice friend.

Whats up with friend's hitting on girls that their other friend wants, even if they couldn't get?

Are they that fucking horny they need to hijack your feelings. Fuck me. There's so many women out there.

About 80% of last year I went out 2 different clubs or karaoke places (friday then saturday) to get wasted with my friends (we'd all pay for rounds) I don't think I ever saw the same group of girls twice in the crowd but there were a couple of regular girls there (other than the promoters and bar tenders).

I might not have got much action last year or in fact most of my college/uni life. (hell most of it was from girls approaching me) but at least I'm not some scumbag friend. I let my friends know who I'm after at least if someone else wants them before me then they get dibs. I don't even give a shit and don't try to get them if they fail. Move on and believe there's someone just as good looking if not better in the future!

Fuck friends that do that.

Anyway I hope the rest of you are successful this weekend.

 

[Minamu]

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Was out on the town tonight, and basically had this girl DTF as soon as she saw me. Kept on grabbing my hand, caressing my face, etc; and then I got totally cockblocked by her two friends. So close to victory!
I'll take it as an ego booster, though. I'm moving on up...this year has been a tremendous transformation in my character and game.

It feels pretty good, doesn't it? I haven't had much success since this summer either (apart from attracting the wrong girls) but the transformation of myself into something more, even though I'm far from complete, is so rewarding in and of itself, that I don't really care. I'm not doing any of this for the women, but for myself. They were just the catalyst.

 

[Attackthebase]

It feels pretty good, doesn't it? I haven't had much success since this summer either (apart from attracting the wrong girls) but the transformation of myself into something more, even though I'm far from complete, is so rewarding in and of itself, that I don't really care. I'm not doing any of this for the women, but for myself. They were just the catalyst.

Exactly! Since I started my transformation in the summer, I fucking love myself. In a way, I'm like Ramses II. Anyway, your post reflects my situation. Summer was great for attracting women. Right now, I, of course, attract women, but not really any I find to appeal to my taste.

But, I'm going to continue to improve myself, since it's for me and not for anyone else!

 

[Coeliacus]

TheVampire, any time is the right time to kiss. As soon as you have a desire to kiss her, that's the right time. I even kissed a girl while we were walking to the toilet once. She was like "how awkward, what are you doing?" and I replied "shut up" and kissed her. She loved it.

That's pretty boss. Love it.

 

[CherryWoodFuton]

House party tomorrow.....tons of girls coming.....what do GAF?????

 

[hipgnosis]

House party tomorrow.....tons of girls coming.....what do GAF?????

Drink moderately, dress well and talk to lots of girls.

 

[Sanky Panky]

Ok gaf.. How do you reel them in when it comes to online dating? I get messages from beautiful girls and I get replies when I message them. But I just cant seem to keep there interest.. Which is odd cause I don't have the same problem when dating the old fashion way lol

Following up on what SpectreFire said, online you have to step up your game five fold, because women have a short attention spam and get so many messages per day.

By the 4th or 5th message you should be giving her your number to start texting or calling. The way to get to that fourth message is to ONLY talk about what interests her (throw in stories or opinions you have in common). Don't say too much about yourself (gotta leave stuff for the date).

I went out with an OkC girl last night and she says that she picked me because I wasn't like the other hundred idiots that commented on her looks. DO NOT. Also, don't imply or say anything sexual, unless she hints or starts. My date said that is a big turnoff and a lot of guys do it.

By the gaf, I'm happy to announce that I think I finally met the girl. I'll be practical and keep a level head about it, but I was in disbelief last night at how amazing this girl was. To top it off, she's a bit of a freak and has done stuff with girls! To me that's marriage material!

 

[News Bot]

To top it off, she's a bit of a freak

This was my main mistake when I was younger with girls. The ones that tended to be freaks also tended to be the most messed up. 90% of them also had daddy issues, the rest were just sluts.

Then again I've met a few "freaks" that were completely normal, but I didn't know they were freaks until I slept with them. That's always the best. The ones that display it tend to be the bad apples.

 

[low-G]

Hey guys I had a first date with a girl last night (dinner)
It was ok and for once she wasn’t short and fat like a few others I’ve met.
Maybe 6.5/10 for looks so not bad.
We like a lot of the same things and she is a big gamer and loves the resident evil series.

Anyway so we had the dinner and talked for a while and then called it a night because we both had to get up early for work in the morning.
No kiss or anything but I remembered about trying to make some physical contact so I grabbed her hand and felt it while commenting on her Halloween style painted fingernails so I guess that’s something.

Id like to go for a second date but I’m not sure what to do or where to take her.
Somewhere that ends or has an environment where we could at least kiss.
Like at the end of the night we walked back to our cars (parked close) and that was it.
It never seems like the right environment or moment for it.

Was her name Maria?

the next excuse a few days later was 'I watched a scary film, so i couldn't sleep very well because i kept thinking about it.' by this point Im thinking... wtf is this girl 12 or something.

Technically, this is a legit thing. I have a female friend that's like that, only make it a week.

 

[Spacebar]

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Was out on the town tonight, and basically had this girl DTF as soon as she saw me. Kept on grabbing my hand, caressing my face, etc; and then I got totally cockblocked by her two friends. So close to victory!
I'll take it as an ego booster, though. I'm moving on up...this year has been a tremendous transformation in my character and game.

I hate that shit. I was out with some friends one night and one of the girls invited some of her co workers. Three of them showed up and I was talking to one of them. Then the other two got pissed off because no guys were hitting on them and started to bitch. They decided to leave and the girl I was talking to had to leave with them. Ohh well move on to the next one.

 

[Minamu]

Exactly! Since I started my transformation in the summer, I fucking love myself. In a way, I'm like Ramses II. Anyway, your post reflects my situation. Summer was great for attracting women. Right now, I, of course, attract women, but not really any I find to appeal to my taste.

But, I'm going to continue to improve myself, since it's for me and not for anyone else!

I know that feel I'm off to a very late Halloween party in an hour or two ^^

 

[Etrian Oddity]

Drink moderately, dress well and talk to lots of girls.

Don't be a wallflower; don't be a creeper; be confident!!!

 

[equap]

I hate that shit. I was out with some friends one night and one of the girls invited some of her co workers. Three of them showed up and I was talking to one of them. Then the other two got pissed off because no guys were hitting on them and started to bitch. They decided to leave and the girl I was talking to had to leave with them. Ohh well move on to the next one.

didn't get her number?

 

[Jamesfrom818]

I went out on a date with a girl earlier this week. I had a really good time. I liked her so I decided to take it slow and not try to spoil the night by going for a kiss. I want to save that for our 2nd date when she gets back in town 10 days from now.

So yesterday I schedule a date with another girl for Sunday. From our conversation so far, it seem like she's down to fuck if I play my cards right. Hell, she probably would have came over last night if I had asked her an hour or two earlier. I know I shouldn't feel guilty since I'm not exclusive to the girl I dated earlier this week but I do feel a little bad.

 

[CherryWoodFuton]

Don't be a wallflower; don't be a creeper; be confident!!!

I'm hosting it so being a wallflower is out of the question....one girl in particular seems very eager about the party though (posting on my fb wall and texting me about how excited she is). She's smangable material but I'd rather mess with girls that don't have a kid lol

 

[Etrian Oddity]

I'm hosting it so being a wallflower is out of the question....one girl in particular seems very eager about the party though (posting on my fb wall and texting me about how excited she is). She's smangable material but I'd rather mess with girls that don't have a kid lol

Milfs need lovin too bro

 

[Jamesfrom818]

I'm hosting it so being a wallflower is out of the question....one girl in particular seems very eager about the party though (posting on my fb wall and texting me about how excited she is). She's smangable material but I'd rather mess with girls that don't have a kid lol

Girls with kids put out. The kid is evidence.

 

[Cubsfan23]

Ok gaf.. How do you reel them in when it comes to online dating? I get messages from beautiful girls and I get replies when I message them. But I just cant seem to keep there interest.. Which is odd cause I don't have the same problem when dating the old fashion way lol

don't do endless messaging, they either want to meet up and hook up or just be a cock tease on there. The ones who want to hook up will want to exchange contact info, and then from there you just meet them at like a coffee shop near your or her place, so that you know she looks like her pic. Don't spend a lot of time at the coffee place. Rinse and Repeat.

 

[Prologue]

Theres this girl in my class(college) thats slowly gaining my interest. She just gives off that "kind girl" vibe. I would think making a move at the end of the semester would be smarter, to avoid any potential awkwardness. Or should I say something now?

Feedback? Never really met anyone that I was interested in, in a class before.

no gaf love?