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[Ardenyal]

She is a cheater, she will do it to whoever she dates next.

Shit sucks but life goes on.

 

[Arment]

Dump her unceremoniously and drop a truth bomb on his wife.

 

[Dilly]

End it but I wouldn't tell his wife because they got a kid and all. He might be a cheating scumbag but still a decent father.

Providing a stable environment and not cheating on the mother of your child is part of being a decent father.

 

[Maddocks]

break up with her and then destroy that guys marriage then get her fired then say happy new year! when confronted for doing all of that.

Fuck em, this is psychological warfare and you need to win it. For you, for your country, for the world!

 

[pants]

How did you end up with my ex?

 

[John Kowalski]

Buy a new gun.

 

[Red Liquorice]

Get rid of her and move on. Don't make a big scene with her, no huge arguments and accusations, don't look for revenge, not worth it, just end it, farewell, so long, goodbye, give me back my shit, here's yours, best wishes, see ya.

break up with her and then destroy that guys marriage then get her fired then say happy new year! when confronted for doing all of that.

Fuck em, this is psychological warfare and you need to win it. For you, for your country, for the world!

Don't do this, his marriage is none of your business, his wife will find out sooner or later about him unfortunately. Just move on and forget her, she's the loser here.

 

[Alpha Centauri]

End it.

The quicker you do it the better. And I'm sure temptations are strong to wreck havoc on these people, but the best route to take is to be as civil as possible when breaking it off. All the baggage that would come with getting even is just going to make it harder for you to move on.

Being the bigger man does not make it easier to move on in my experience. Knowing that you did your very best in a relationship to have the other person emotionally cheat and plan to physically cheat the next time they got together is pretty soul-crushing, and no amount of moral high-horsery is going to help the healing process.

With that being said, everything needs to be proportionate if you want to go the even route OP. Forward the Skype messages to the wife (she deserves better just like you do), and prepare to talk to your girlfriend.

Do not get her fired, do not do her physical harm, and don't go shouting at her at the first chance you meet. Calm down and think about what you really want to say to her. Then say it and leave.

Good luck OP, and cheaters are pretty much the worst.

 

[Creamium]

Drop her and delete all possible contact avenues. She's dead now.

Harsh, but best response. As far as you're concerned, this girl doesn't exist anymore.

 

[MrPressStart]

So bang her one last time and tell her to fuck off.

 

[Bomber Bob]

Dump her ass

 

[ShadowKingpin]

I would cut her off completely before you do something drastic and cause a full-scale war over this. That is the LAST thing you want right now.

 

[……forgetit]

Does anyone else remember the grinder thread where a guy was fucking dudes behind his wife's back? Well this is the same situation, if this guy is having sex or planning on having sex with other women it's a danger to his wife. Tell his wife for her safety. She deserves to know.

 

[Pai Pai Master]

You probably shouldn't have gone through her private messages like that, but it's still really shitty of her.

It's not going to work, just leave her to do what she wants. You're better off spending your time and money on yourself or someone who appreciates you.

 

[Gamerloid]

In my experience, once they start casually mentioning some dude they just met in a very positive manner and talking about how fun/funny they are, some shit's going down and you better be wary. It's never a good sign. Like others have said, break it off.

Just for future reference, how should you respond when they first start mentioning some guy they recently met in a positive light? How do you go about it without coming off as jealous or paranoid?

break up with her and then destroy that guys marriage then get her fired then say happy new year! when confronted for doing all of that.

Fuck em, this is psychological warfare and you need to win it. For you, for your country, for the world!

The Batman avatar really makes this post ha ha

 

[.GqueB.]

You have the chance to exact vengeance? Fuck. If you DON'T go through with that then you're a stronger man than I. In those moments, I can get irrational as Fuck.

 

[Stet]

In my experience, once they start casually mentioning some dude they just met in a very positive manner and talking about how fun/funny they are, some shit's going down and you better be wary. It's never a good sign. Like others have said, break it off.

this is bad advice for most people

 

[Crimson-Death]

End it all, cut off all contact with that woman, get tested for STDs, and tell the wife too, she might not have any idea what kind of idiot she has married.

It should not be tolerated nor forgiven at the moment, for your mental sanity in the long run.

 

[Biggu Bosu]

It's over, the fact they were planning to fuck is cheating

 

[……forgetit]

Just for future reference, how should you respond when they first start mentioning some guy they recently met in a positive light? How do you go about it without coming off as jealous or paranoid?



The Batman avatar really makes this post ha ha

Ehh, with my gf we're open enough that we can sound paranoid with the other getting upset. It's a pretty natural reaction in these situations.

 

[Firmus_Anguis]

I hate this type of shit. Lets you spend your money on her, while secretly planning to cheat on you with a married scumbag!
These people seriously don't deserve an ounce of happiness in their lives. How can these assholes live with themselves?!

 

[TimorousPanda]

Sorry dude. Like others have said, she's history.

 

[ThankYouDaletech]

You get to dump her to avoid spending more time with a horrible person and tell that guys wife and make life worse for another horrible person. Sounds good to me.

 

[Malleymal]

Man there are others out there. Even ones that will actually respect you. Imagine that.

Now go out and find one. Some people like havering that rush of someone on the side. It's built into their DNA. Doesn't matter how great of a man you could be.


Side note, that paranoia may have worked this time, but don't make a habit of it. You will do that shit with someone that actually cares and loves you and it will bite you in the ass.

Run

 

[Hagi]

He tried to drink your milkshake OP, enact scorched earth on those motherfuckers.

 

[Mechanized]

Drop her at the curb and tell the dude's wife. These assholes did this to themselves.

You'll find someone better than this dude, you didn't deserve any of this.
Also you telling his wife wouldn't reflect poorly on you at all. It was his choice to cheat, he abandoned his kid and wife the moment he crossed that line. He destroyed his marriage. Nobody else. If it wasn't with your girl it would be with someone else.
I wouldn't have an ounce of guilt over telling her.

 

[dani_dc]

You trusted her and she betrayed your trust, the relationship is over. Do not be tempted to salvage things, it would only further rob you of time in your life and end badly again.

Have a chat with her to end it, and procced by cutting all contact with her.

I agree with other posters that the wife also deserves to know, though that might make the situation more messy to you.

Also my condolences at the lost of your father's friend.

 

[GifGafIsTheBestGaf]

Drop her. Break that guy's marriage if it's easily doable. His wife probably deserves better!

this, i know is petty but you need some self satisfaction that this fuckers didnt go scot free

 

[GutsOfThor]

Fuck shit up OP.

 

[Frustrated_me]

You're not going to leave her, we can tell.

But dude, leave without saying a word. Save your dignity and grace and walk away. You clearly will never trust her again, and shouldn't anyways. This sounds like a plutonic relationship that has turned into poison.

Leave.

 

[AlexMogil]

If you want to continue the relationship, lay out the rules of no contact, expose the relationship to the other party, don't allow her to gaslight you, etc.

In no case is she allowed to blame shift with the concept of privacy. If you were both understood to be in a serious and monogamous relationship, the ol' "you invaded my privacy" bit holds no water.

But I don't think you should want to continue this relationship. It isn't a marriage, and while you might feel like you invested some time into this - and you did - its probably best to let it go. Tear off the band aid in one quick pull. Its up to you if you want to go scorched earth with the other guy, but I don't think I'd waste my energy. She will find out soon enough what happens to a person waiting on a married man.

You got a little healing to do, friend. Might want to focus on yourself for a little while.

 

[Escape Goat]

Shes incredible in just several ways. Find a girl incredible in a lot of ways!

 

[Raptor]

Destroy everything.

 

[Enco]

Dump her and move on.

.

This is the only answer.

The real question is..

Will you be like most GAF users who post threads like this and ignore advice, or will you be the smart one who actually listens?

 

[Unknown One]

This reminds me of a story a gaffer posted years ago. His girlfriend at the time was taking music lessons from this guy and of course she cheated on him with this guy. The poster had an elaborate plan to get revenge. Basically he met this guy's fiance, then timed when he would sleep with her so the guy would catch them in the act.

Not sure if it was true or not, but it was a good read.

 

[littlegrasshopper]

This reminds me of a story a gaffer posted years ago. His girlfriend at the time was taking music lessons from this guy and of course she cheated on him with this guy. The poster had an elaborate plan to get revenge. Basically he met this guy's fiance, then timed when he would sleep with her so the guy would catch them in the act.

Not sure if it was true or not, but it was a good read.

You peaked my interest. Link please!

 

[Anony]

I could destroy that guy's marriage. I could make her lose her fucking job, too. Fuck

please do this at least, that guy's wife has a right to know

 

[Mengetsu]

This reminds me of a story a gaffer posted years ago. His girlfriend at the time was taking music lessons from this guy and of course she cheated on him with this guy. The poster had an elaborate plan to get revenge. Basically he met this guy's fiance, then timed when he would sleep with her so the guy would catch them in the act.

Not sure if it was true or not, but it was a good read.

Holy shit! So evil..but Karma is a bitch.

OP end it and tell the wife. She shouldn't find out any other way.

 

[Unknown One]

You peaked my interest. Link please!

I wish I could find it. I'm hoping that gaffer shows up and repost the story.

 

[ReturnOfTheRAT]

Watching the world burn would be fun though.

 

[Azulsky]

Sorry you had to go through that OP.

 

[Valnen]

I hate this type of shit. Lets you spend your money on her, while secretly planning to cheat on you with a married scumbag!
These people seriously don't deserve an ounce of happiness in their lives. How can these assholes live with themselves?!

Definitely. These types deserve to be truly alone in the world.

 

[IISANDERII]

Hi, I'll try to make this quick. Sorry if my english isn't very good, it's not my first language.
I'm in a 10 month relationship with this girl who is incredible in several ways but at the same time poisons me a lot.

She started working at a new job 4 months ago in a new field for her, so she is always excited talking about the things she learns every day and so on, but something clicked when she started talking about a guy she works with (The guy has one brother who also works with him). The dude is on another country, is married and have a kid. He and her brother travels to my country for work related things a few times a year. Anyway, I made the mistake of looking at their Skype conversation once when she first started the job and they talked all day non-stop. That made me paranoid because they had conversations about a lot of things which I don't talk with her on that level, you know? They just clicked.
So no biggie I say. But a few weeks later I notice they started talking on FB, Twitter, Whatsapp, pretty much everywhere. I never said anything to her but I noticed she was more possesive of her cellphone, she even changed her lock pattern (which I didn't knew) to a pin code and obviously that triggered something in me. What is she hiding? She knows I don't fuck around with other girls, I've told her several times my iPhone code and she can look at it whenever she wants.
I could sense she was hiding something.
At this point I let things be. That was 3 months ago.

Yesterday I had such a bad day, a lady crashed my car, my friend's dad passed away, I had several hardware issues on my servers. I was feeling so fucking down and thinking about her and that dude talking non-stop while I'm going through all of this and it was like I was trying to find something that could send me over the edge.
And I did.
I know it's fucked up but when you "sense" it, is it wrong to do what I did?
I looked at her Skype conversation with that guy of the entire month of December, which was probably our best month together, several trips, awesome moments, and so on.
To sum it up: I couldn't believe what I read. It was like watching the most fucked up porno movie in text form for an entire month. And I saw videos, pictures, voice messages, too.
The guy had to come for work 2 weeks ago and they were planning to fuck, in the end, the guy didn't come but her brother did, and he brought her a present from the guy. It was so fucking hurtful to read how a fucking scarf made her feel and when I planned a trip for her, made dinner reservations under the fucking full moon on the Iguazu Falls she didn't have that reaction.
I'm just torn to pieces, I want to confront her today and end this shit. I'm fueled with rage. I could destroy that guy's marriage. I could make her lose her fucking job, too. Fuck
I just needed to vent, GAF.
I don't know what to do.
I could never trust her again.

Send the conversation to the wife. She needs to know, it would be cruel to keep her ignorant.

 

[Vicetrailia]

I would explode on her and I would destroy him. You don't have to leave this situation tactfully leaving as little footprint as possible, do what feels right to you. I wouldn't make her lose her job, but that's just me. If you destroy him and they end up together they won't be able to have a lasting relationship so you won't have to worry about that angle. Regardless he will ditch her for his wife anyway.

 

[-Pyromaniac-]

Dump her ass asap and tell the guys wife what's going on. Then those 2 can go have each other and fuck off while you move on.

Reading the part about all you did for her and then the scarf thing had me pissed lol. If I was you I'd operation carpet bomb everything I possibly could, or separate myself quickly before I did something dumb.

 

[JensenBeeswax]

For the love of god dude, walk.

 

[Alpha Centauri]

I hate this type of shit. Lets you spend your money on her, while secretly planning to cheat on you with a married scumbag!
These people seriously don't deserve an ounce of happiness in their lives. How can these assholes live with themselves?!

The ego is a funny thing. We are all the protagonists in our own story. You never stop to think if you're the villain in someone else's.

 

[Borgnine]

I don't think anyone here would have a problem removing that "emotional" qualifier. Just leave.

 

[AlphaSnake]

I can't be upset at you for looking through her texts and such. If you were suspicious, then fuck it...you were right. And now you know the truth.

Confront her and tell her it's over. If you guys live together, kick her the fuck out. She's a no good piece of trash.

 

[PetriP-TNT]

I can't be upset at you for looking through her texts and such. If you were suspicious, then fuck it...you were right. And now you know the truth.

Are you the NSA?