This is lovely.
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GirlGAF |OT 2| Shall I Compare Thee to a Summer's Eve?
- Thread starter Devolution
- Start date
This is lovely.
Mhmm.
The Librarian
Banned
Homer: Oh, here we are: [opens door] [lusty] the Utility Room.
[it's a real utility room with two cots]
Marge: This isn't very erotic. It's an actual utility room.
Homer: No, honey: it's a romantic fantasy. I imagine I'm the janitor
and you're...the janitor's wife, who has to live with me in the
utility room.
[they lie down on the cots]
Manager: [walking in] Don't mind me, folks, just need to get the old
wet-dry vac.
Wow! Me and Homer have so much in common...
I...don't know what to think...
BladeWorker
Member
Have you asked her what she wants? What she *really* wants? Maybe it's pizza and gifts and that's exactly what she wants from you. Maybe it's to go out and paint the town red with friends for a night. Maybe it's to sleep in. Who knows.
At that age, the thing that I wanted most was to be heard and understood, and to be among those who heard and understood me.
Point of order: that you're concerned enough to ask about this is sweet!
Arsenic Yellow
Member
I've been eyeing that dress as well, but no money and its been a rough week. Was interviewed for two jobs I've been dying for, Lush and David's Tea. They were both group interviews and I didn't get either job. then I get a huge bombshell dropped on me.
My brother is three years younger than me and was about to graduate in 20 days from LSU with a major in chemistry. He had taken some test and was planning on going to pharmacy school this coming fall. Parents had found an apartment for him near the school and he was moving out from his current apartment that my parents pay for this month, now that he was graduating.
I've always been the more difficult child. Had trouble with school, was in abusive relationships, but I really turned things around and now I'm going for my masters. My parents were so excited that my brother was about to graduate and both of their children would have bachelor degrees.
I get a call yesterday from my mom in tears. Turns out my brother has been lying to them for 2.5 years and he hasnt been going to school at all. He's literally done NOTHING for 2.5 years and weaved an intricate lie to all of us. My parents weren't paying tuition because he told them he was working for the chemistry department. They were, however, paying for his apartment. Yesterday, he conveniently renewed his lease before telling them to truth, so now he has to stay there and my parents cant get out of the lease (they signed for it). He hasn't even ever had a job, at the age of 23, nor does he have any friends.
The asshole that he is, barely show's any remorse, I yelled at him through the phone, telling him "can't you admit you've been stealing from your family for 2.5 years"? He was silent for a good 2-3 minutes until finally he said "Well, if you want to put it that bluntly, yes". I've never been so disgusted in my entire life. I told him that he's shamed our family, my parents, and he is not a man in any sense. Of course, at this moment, he's pretty much dead to me.
The list of fucked up things he's lied about are truly terrifying.
He's called my mom every day and made up stories of what he was doing at "work".
He pretended to take a pharmacy test. My parents drove him there and he just sat around, pretending to take a test. Even faked the scores.
Faked report cards by photoshopping and printing them out to my parents.
My mother has cancer, she's had it since I was little. She has to get something in her stomach checked on, but decided to wait until after his graduation to go under the knife for fear of it being something bad. We've known for a few months now.
My father works 3 jobs, two full time, to support the family (including my brother).
My parents haven't visited me since I've moved, a year and a half ago, because they needed to save the money for my brother's move to pharmacy school this year.
My parent's arent young either, my mom is 60 and my dad 63. All my dad talks about is how proud he is of us and how he can retire and die happy that both of his kids were finally graduating.
He even used me as an excuse for quitting. I was suicidal back in 2006-07 after an abusive relationship. He claimed that he quit right after I attempted suicide and didnt tell them because he thought it would hurt them too much. Keep in mind, he was still in high school when I stopped cutting and got my life back on track. He didnt even quick college until 2010.
I'm so upset for my parents right now. My father hasnt even spoken to me, he's too depressed and according to my mom, has cried the most out of the three of them. He wanted to take the week off, but he's the general manager and the owner is gone for the week, at some stupid auction, so he's forced to work. I want to visit them so badly right now but we dont have the money, having just put 4k into an apartment we are moving into in boston. I've never been so disgusted in someone, I wont be surprised if he ends up being diagnosed as having antisocial personality disorder.
Sorry for the rant guys. I just needed to vent. My parents are so embarrassed. Not only did he lie about this, but he kept telling them he was making all A's, so they bragged about it to everyone. My dad even had his friend, who teaches at the pharmacy school, talk to my brother a few times about what he needed to do for the test. Our extended family members have also given him money for graduation. Now my parents have to tell everyone that it was all a lie.
How did he get found out?I've been eyeing that dress as well, but no money and its been a rough week. Was interviewed for two jobs I've been dying for, Lush and David's Tea. They were both group interviews and I didn't get either job. then I get a huge bombshell dropped on me.
My brother is three years younger than me and was about to graduate in 20 days from LSU with a major in chemistry. He had taken some test and was planning on going to pharmacy school this coming fall. Parents had found an apartment for him near the school and he was moving out from his current apartment that my parents pay for this month, now that he was graduating.
I've always been the more difficult child. Had trouble with school, was in abusive relationships, but I really turned things around and now I'm going for my masters. My parents were so excited that my brother was about to graduate and both of their children would have bachelor degrees.
I get a call yesterday from my mom in tears. Turns out my brother has been lying to them for 2.5 years and he hasnt been going to school at all. He's literally done NOTHING for 2.5 years and weaved an intricate lie to all of us. My parents weren't paying tuition because he told them he was working for the chemistry department. They were, however, paying for his apartment. Yesterday, he conveniently renewed his lease before telling them to truth, so now he has to stay there and my parents cant get out of the lease (they signed for it). He hasn't even ever had a job, at the age of 23, nor does he have any friends.
The asshole that he is, barely show's any remorse, I yelled at him through the phone, telling him "can't you admit you've been stealing from your family for 2.5 years"? He was silent for a good 2-3 minutes until finally he said "Well, if you want to put it that bluntly, yes". I've never been so disgusted in my entire life. I told him that he's shamed our family, my parents, and he is not a man in any sense. Of course, at this moment, he's pretty much dead to me.
The list of fucked up things he's lied about are truly terrifying.
He's called my mom every day and made up stories of what he was doing at "work".
He pretended to take a pharmacy test. My parents drove him there and he just sat around, pretending to take a test. Even faked the scores.
Faked report cards by photoshopping and printing them out to my parents.
My mother has cancer, she's had it since I was little. She has to get something in her stomach checked on, but decided to wait until after his graduation to go under the knife for fear of it being something bad. We've known for a few months now.
My father works 3 jobs, two full time, to support the family (including my brother).
My parents haven't visited me since I've moved, a year and a half ago, because they needed to save the money for my brother's move to pharmacy school this year.
My parent's arent young either, my mom is 60 and my dad 63. All my dad talks about is how proud he is of us and how he can retire and die happy that both of his kids were finally graduating.
He even used me as an excuse for quitting. I was suicidal back in 2006-07 after an abusive relationship. He claimed that he quit right after I attempted suicide and didnt tell them because he thought it would hurt them too much. Keep in mind, he was still in high school when I stopped cutting and got my life back on track. He didnt even quick college until 2010.
I'm so upset for my parents right now. My father hasnt even spoken to me, he's too depressed and according to my mom, has cried the most out of the three of them. He wanted to take the week off, but he's the general manager and the owner is gone for the week, at some stupid auction, so he's forced to work. I want to visit them so badly right now but we dont have the money, having just put 4k into an apartment we are moving into in boston. I've never been so disgusted in someone, I wont be surprised if he ends up being diagnosed as having antisocial personality disorder.
Sorry for the rant guys. I just needed to vent. My parents are so embarrassed. Not only did he lie about this, but he kept telling them he was making all A's, so they bragged about it to everyone. My dad even had his friend, who teaches at the pharmacy school, talk to my brother a few times about what he needed to do for the test. Our extended family members have also given him money for graduation. Now my parents have to tell everyone that it was all a lie.
FallingEdge
Member
Oh wow. I'm sorry to hear all of that. It really sucks =/
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Just plain ran out of time is my guess. Once your supposed graduation arrives, you can't necessarily just keep going on to grad school in that situation. You pretty much have to give up the charade.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
He renewed the lease for his apartment, that my parents consigned for, them called my parents and told them everything. He claims he could've kept the lie going but how delusional can you be to actually think that?
They are takin him to a psychiatrist today and though we were talking about me flying down there this week, they said they'd rather I stay here, that I would cause "too much tension". Needless to say, I've felt empty the last few days. Every time I start relaxing an smiling, I think of how badly my father and mother are hurting.
I was going to make a thread about it, but I was afraid of the backlash I would recieve concerning my parents and the fact that they may be enabling him.
As of today, they are also making him get a job near his apartment. They couldn't get out of the lease so they are makin him pay for everything now.
When I asked him what he's been doing with himself for two and a half years with no jobs, friends or schoolig, he said he's learned "a little about computer repair". I was shocked and told him that was bullshit. Now he decided on goig to community college to pull his grades up then going back to lsu for computer science.
It's been nonstop stress for the past two weeks, first the Boston bombing and now this...
I'm honestly scared for the health and safety of my parents at this point. He's been lying so long, what else is he capable of? That and I'm surprised my father didnt have a stroke or heart attack. They aren't young anymore and this type of sadness can really affect them, especially my mom and her already poor health. At this point, he's almost dead to me. unless I see some sort of change, I won't speak to him again.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
Thats what I said but at this point, they are pretty adamant about him just working and paying the rent himself. All of this is so utterly mind blowing.
SquiddyCracker
Banned
Yeah, there's no way he's going to do that.
Subletting is probably the best option until he's gone through some therapy, and even that won't help unless he wants to change his behaviour.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
They are embarrassed and shamed but they could never disown him. Also idk why, but they aren't doing the subletting. He's gonna go to community college this summer then start working and going to school in the fall. He's getting off far too easy in my opinion. At this point, I would cut him off completely and make him work in the summer and go to school in the fall.
Today I found out that he went to a psychologist. I had to explain to my mom how much of a waste that was, that he needs to be going ot a psychiatrist. After explaining that a PH.D doesnt mean you're a doctor of medicine, my mom finally understood. They were going to take him to therapy for 6 months and if nothing got better after that, then go get him diagnosed. Thank god I convinced her to take him to someone else.
Whats worse is that asshole would always yell at me when I'd visit about how I cound't understand how hard he's working and studying. Last time I visited, he immediately went into his room without even saying hi and slept 10-14 hours. When I told him how shitty that was, to not even say hi after not seeing me for a year, he said "I was up studying until 2am last night, leave me alone."
This is so unreal. I've got no hope for him and honestly dont think I'll ever forgive him for the pain he's cause my parents.
Today I found out that he went to a psychologist. I had to explain to my mom how much of a waste that was, that he needs to be going ot a psychiatrist. After explaining that a PH.D doesnt mean you're a doctor of medicine, my mom finally understood. They were going to take him to therapy for 6 months and if nothing got better after that, then go get him diagnosed. Thank god I convinced her to take him to someone else.
Whats worse is that asshole would always yell at me when I'd visit about how I cound't understand how hard he's working and studying. Last time I visited, he immediately went into his room without even saying hi and slept 10-14 hours. When I told him how shitty that was, to not even say hi after not seeing me for a year, he said "I was up studying until 2am last night, leave me alone."
This is so unreal. I've got no hope for him and honestly dont think I'll ever forgive him for the pain he's cause my parents.
Femmeworth
Banned
He needs to see a psychologist and a psychiatrist.
Edit: To expand on that, in my experience psychiatrists pretty much only prescribe medications and leave the actual diagnosis and everything else to psychologists. Maybe it's different in your region.
Edit: To expand on that, in my experience psychiatrists pretty much only prescribe medications and leave the actual diagnosis and everything else to psychologists. Maybe it's different in your region.
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Actually, it is for some people at that age. If he did it during the day though, that'd be different of course.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
Yeah that's what I told them. I said "get diagnosed with a psychiatrist now and continue with the psychologist". the psychologist told him he wanted to meet up every other week, but they can't afford that and are opting for once a month, which I'm very much against. Would rather he bite the bullet and pay for every other week, at least initially.
I told them something was up months ago, but they kept defending him saying he's working so hard, to leave him alone. A few months ago, I grilled him because he wasn't aware of how much pharmacy school tuition cost, nor the deadline. When I told my mom that he doesn't seem passionate about this, that something was up, her response was "drop it, you dont understand how hard he's working". If I only would've pushed it further.
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Yeah, but a blanket statement of "sleeping for 10-12 hours is not normal" is different.
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
Late teens to early adulthood, ideally you should be getting 8.5-9.5 hours. Some can get away with 6.5-7, others need 10-12. 12 is the high end of normal, and yes that much sleep could be a sign of depression, but by itself its not necessarily an indicator of anything. I remember back in high school and early in college, I'd average 7 hours of sleep and have to get up with an alarm clock when I had to do something in the morning, but if I could help it I'd regularly sleep in until 10 AM - noon before naturally waking up and feeling properly rested (and this is not waking up earlier in the morning and deciding to stay in bed either). And that's with going to bed around 11 PM to midnight. Another friend was the same way - she wouldn't feel rested without getting at least 10 hours, even if she was averaging 8 hours a night.
That was over 10 years ago though, now I'm fine with 7-8 hours.
BladeWorker
Member
I'm going to leave the sleep/depression/personality disorder stuff alone and raise another question:
Isn't this kind of lying which results in the financial benefit of the liar considered...fraud?
Isn't this kind of lying which results in the financial benefit of the liar considered...fraud?
Zoe
Member
He definitely has issues based on all the lying, but not caring about a sibling does not mean you have mental issues.
Devolution
Member
Sounds like depression and a lack of direction/ambition although he doesn't even sound remorseful so that bothers me.
shanshan310
Member
I'm so sorry to hear that AY Your brother sounds a lot like mine actually. He's 15, but he hasn't gone to school for almost 2 years. He just sits at home and plays games (no idea where the money comes from). My parents have spent so much money on doctors and psychologists, but with or without medication and support from friends and family no one can really gauge a reason why he's refusing to go.
All I can say is, try not to be angry. I know I am quite often, but at the end of the day I'd rather just accept him as my brother and be happy he's alive, even if he's making life hard for my parents and tearing the house apart.
Your brother sounds a lot like mine actually. He's 15, but he hasn't gone to school for almost 2 years. He just sits at home and plays games (no idea where the money comes from). My parents have spent so much money on doctors and psychologists, but with or without medication and support from friends and family no one can really gauge a reason why he's refusing to go. All I can say is, try not to be angry. I know I am quite often, but at the end of the day I'd rather just accept him as my brother and be happy he's alive, even if he's making life hard for my parents and tearing the house apart.
I'm so sorry to hear that AY
All I can say is, try not to be angry. I know I am quite often, but at the end of the day I'd rather just accept him as my brother and be happy he's alive, even if he's making life hard for my parents and tearing the house apart.
That kind of sounds like myself, I was home-schooled and when I was 13 to 15 I kind of spent all of my time browsing internet forums and playing video games all-day.
I did indirectly learn a lot of things through that though, and my parents are partly to blame for spoiling me, but it's a striking contrast to where I am at now.shanshan310
Member
The thing is though there's this awful facade about him going. He's still enrolled and might be convinced by my mother to do a half day every couple of weeks. He just keeps her hopes up and breaks her heart. He's not being homeschooled at all. He just refuses to get out of bed, or gets violent. Probably because he's up all night. I didn't realise you were homeschooled laf! It does make my brother's future seem a little more promising. you turned out pretty goodThat kind of sounds like myself, I was home-schooled and when I was 13 to 15 I kind of spent all of my time browsing internet forums and playing video games all-day.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
Thanks guys for all your support. Things are only getting worse back home, but at this point, I can't tell them what to do with him. My parents are pretty much losing it and taking their anger out on me. They are now putting him back to school this summer and he will start working part time in the fall. I think he should be out of school this summer and actually work full time for once in his life. He told them that he doesn't play video games, but I found his steam account with over 170 hours of game play just last month. Of course he says that his friends borrow his steam account. When I told my mom that he was probably lying, she started screaming, not saying words or anything, just screaming then hung up. 5 minutes later she calls me back and starts berating me. call my dad to check up on him and he does the same, complains and blames my mother. Of course when I call him out on it, that she has nothing to do with my brother's mistakes, he tells me if I mention a word of what he's said to my mom, he's done with me. I'm pretty much backing off for now. Can't tell them what to do with him and
I'm so sorry about your brother shanshan. I can't take the lies, he's' not 15, hes almost 24, close to 10 years older than your brother. At this point, I pretty much have no brother in my eyes. I'm not going to coddle or accept him. It would be one thing if he was still a teenager, but he's practically an adult. I seem to be the only one making him take responsibility. I went through a lot of things, way worse than my brother and its killing me that they are comparing my dropping out of college for a year and being suicidal because of a physically and sexually abusive relationship while working full time and him lying for 2.5 years and doing absolutely nothing. Comparing the two situations is only further enabling him and I will never forgive him for the pain he's caused this family. My mom is moving out into my brothers apartment for the next two weeks so my dad stops berating her.
sorry I turned this into a livejournal entry If things get worse, maybe I'll making a venting thread, but the only way it can get worse at this point is if things turn physical, which could be a very real possibility.
I'm so sorry about your brother shanshan.
I can't take the lies, he's' not 15, hes almost 24, close to 10 years older than your brother. At this point, I pretty much have no brother in my eyes. I'm not going to coddle or accept him. It would be one thing if he was still a teenager, but he's practically an adult. I seem to be the only one making him take responsibility. I went through a lot of things, way worse than my brother and its killing me that they are comparing my dropping out of college for a year and being suicidal because of a physically and sexually abusive relationship while working full time and him lying for 2.5 years and doing absolutely nothing. Comparing the two situations is only further enabling him and I will never forgive him for the pain he's caused this family. My mom is moving out into my brothers apartment for the next two weeks so my dad stops berating her. sorry I turned this into a livejournal entry
If things get worse, maybe I'll making a venting thread, but the only way it can get worse at this point is if things turn physical, which could be a very real possibility.XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
I've found that, these days, noone's truly an adult until their late 20s it seems. :/
I wouldn't be so quick to judge here - until you know all the details on what's going on in his head or his situation, he could very well be suffering a great deal for some yet to be discovered reason. I understand why you'd feel the way you do, but I've seen similar situations where there was a definite story on what was going on the other side but it took the family quite a bit of digging.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
Yeah, I know I'm probably being too harsh, but they are being far too lenient and I know its going to end with them hurt again. I lost it when he blamed my depression on this. It just doesnt feel like he really feels sorry, only sad that he got caught. WhenI asked him if he had a computer hidden at his house, he said "Ask mom if she finds one tomorrow when she checks my apartment." I'm not dumb, I know he probably has it at a friends house. I would feel totally different if he really seemed like he felt guilt and wanted to change, but at this point, I just see the sadness my parents are feeling, especially considering my mom has her tests next month. Her skin around her stomach has dark spots, I kept telling her she needs to go to a doctor NOW, especially considering she had pre cancer polyps in her colon. He knew all this and still lied for months, having her postpone until after his graduation. I know he may have mental health issues, in fact I'm sure of it, but the fact that its affecting my mom's health is just too much for me.
Honestly AY, it sounds like they've found out their favourite child is a huge fucking failure and now they're attacking anything that isn't him in the chaos that revelation has caused. They seem pretty adamant in not blaming him too much or actually punish him. If your father would rather disown you (sounds like that's what he meant with being done with you) than the little shit who actually exploited them... it might be time to distance yourself from them and let the clusterfuck run its course.
Femmeworth
Banned
That sounds all around fucked, Arsenic. My only suggestion is group therapy.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
Thanks guys for all the support. ill stop turning this into live journal.
Ok, this is probably going to be a weird request, but I need some help on finding a handbag or purse to suit my style.
I normally drive my car everywhere, so I've never needed to carry much on my person other than car keys and a wallet, plus I always wear jeans or shorts with cargo pockets.
Anyways, "designer" stuff is really not my style, but I'm not sure what would be more fitting. (I'm more the skater/surf/gamer shirt + jeans + track sneakers type, definitely a bit tomboyish)
I normally drive my car everywhere, so I've never needed to carry much on my person other than car keys and a wallet, plus I always wear jeans or shorts with cargo pockets.
Anyways, "designer" stuff is really not my style, but I'm not sure what would be more fitting. (I'm more the skater/surf/gamer shirt + jeans + track sneakers type, definitely a bit tomboyish)
Devolution
Member
Cross body handbags sound like your best bet.
http://www.rei.com/product/847846/sherpani-zooma-shoulder-bag-womens
Something like this maybe?
ClassyPenguin
Banned
http://www.unwinnable.com/2013/04/26/tits-or-gtfo/
Thought I'd share this here.
Thought I'd share this here.
Arsenic Yellow
Member
just look around for any sort of messenger bags. How much money are you looking to spend? I'm a vegetarian so I can't order from this company, but if you're looking for something a little pricier but worth the money, I'd advice getting a custom satchel from the cambridge satchel company.
You pick the size, color type, and can have it monogrammed. The prices range from $120-$170 but you can find one pre made on ebay. They also sell discounted ones due to slight manufacturing errors.
You can always find a similar looking bag for cheaper searching for cambridge satchels. I'm not much of a designer person myself. I'll buy something because I like it and name brand has never been a deciding factor.
I also had a quick question:
I have an interview tomorrow at Urban Outfitters in Boston near the marketplace. They say come dressed as you would if you worked at the store. What do you guys think of this outfit? Apologies for the ragged face I was visiting my boyfriend's family and they wanted to go to atlantic city. My family drama + the fact that they mostly speak russianaround me really exhausted me and soured my mood. That and casinos are probably the most depressing things in the world to me.
I have a pair of light pink tights I'll wear instead of the grey I'm wearing here. Do you guys think it's trendy enough? I'm going for a spring look. I also feel like my neck may be too bare, so I may either wear a scarf or buy a necklace. Not sure yet, but any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Devolution
Member
I'd definitely utilize the pink if you're trying to sell clothes or apply for a job to sell clothes. The grey just seems like some classy night attire.
BladeWorker
Member
That is just the kind of screaming-at-the-world rant that I needed on a day like today. Thank you.
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
I'm so tired of all feminism talk on GAF. Hey let's get angry at everything. Hey let's act like nothing's wrong.
I'm sick of this forum
I'm sick of this forum
shanshan310
Member
When it gets too grinding I usually just sink back into community for a while :/
Arsenic Yellow
Member
I feel the same way, Really close to quitting, but I enjoy my communities so I just stick to my subscribed threads. I'm disgusted at gaf when it comes to feminism.
The Librarian
Banned
What thread prompted this response?
Isn't there like half a dozen of threads on the gaming side about Dragons Crown, or more specifically the Sorceress in that game, right now? Could be any of those I guess.
Could you expand on the last part? I'm curious why you think it's so bad.
Could you expand on the last part? I'm curious why you think it's so bad.
Browsing OT will do that to you. Community threads are the best.
Professor Beef
Banned
The best way to browse GAF. I only look through Gaming/OT when there's no new posts in my subscription list.
Devolution
Member
Those discussions are stuck between "big tits is sexual objectification and all objectification is wrong" vs "who the fuck cares how female characters are presented stop trying to censor creators."
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