User 100115
Banned
Oh, so her minor injuries mean she wasn't terrified and fearing for her life? My mistake. People break under lesser circumstances.
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Husband travels 160 miles to kill man having an affair with his Wife
- Thread starter Dram
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Oh, so her minor injuries mean she wasn't terrified and fearing for her life? My mistake. People break under lesser circumstances.
So not speaking out directly about this murder and how awful it is means you condone it? The word condone has come up while posters have accused other posters.
... Still not getting it, I don't know or care if she gave it up. That theory holds just as much weight as the spousal abuse theory. That was my point, not that it was true.
Devolution
Member
What did she have to fear from him being handcuffed to a chair and unable to move?
Kano on the Phone
Member
I see an equivocation on victim blaming, not a comparison of circumstances.
No, that would be her psychotic husband.
Fenderputty
Banned
Who here is arguing it's a valid reason to do what he did? It's just not very surprising.
Maybe I'm inserting myself into the scenario. I would feel guilty thinking about cheating on my wife, let alone following through and seeing the resulting death of someone and imprisonment of another.
You're right. I wasn't saying trying to say that those specific two are comparable, but blaming a persons actions, to me, is int he same territory of blaming victims of crimes for their circumstances. Rape happens in all forms, including consensual sex that turns into rape. I agree with what you're saying, and wasn't trying to paint a picture other wise. They were just examples of the mindset of victim blaming.
John Kowalski
Banned
Corpus Christi is such a creepy name for a town, jeez.
Absolutely no one and I am not accusing him of saying it. I am saying that once you start saying a wife who cheats is no more deserving of retribution than a woman in revealing clothing, you invite the baser people of the world to consider the flipped version. And there are already too many people who think a woman who chooses to dress sexy is guilty of something.
quickdevilred
Banned
I know victim blaming is bad but if I walk up to a biker guy and squeeze his gonads I would not be surprised if he killed me.
Not saying cheating on your husband is the same as sexually harassing a biker but clearly there is something there that could be leaned on as blame a little bit.
Its not the same as walking down the street in a bikini, you are actively doing something to hurt the other person when you cheat.
Not saying cheating on your husband is the same as sexually harassing a biker but clearly there is something there that could be leaned on as blame a little bit.
Its not the same as walking down the street in a bikini, you are actively doing something to hurt the other person when you cheat.
In this case the victim does share some of the burden since their actions were the motivator and causation of their deaths, you simply do not sleep with another man's wife and not expect some consequences if found. Murder and assault are not unknown or rare consequences of such situations, they are in fact common, so anyone going into such an relationship should at least be mindful that it could happen. You do not go into another's live and ruin it, and not expect some form of harm in return, that is just a silly notion.
freenudemacusers
Member
he was simply preventing her from cheating while he went to go murder someone. 160 miles is a long drive.
Come on, this is ridiculous. Cheating does not constitute a reaction of murder. The blame is on the man who killed the guy and no one else.
Maybe you think the blame is on the man's parents too, because without him ever having been born, none of this would have happened? Yes, what you said sounds as silly as that.
Kano on the Phone
Member
But what retribution? No one said that the woman who cheated didn't deserve to be divorced.
You'd be a little too murdered to be surprised.
Killing a person should not be a reasonable reaction from any person. And it isn't for almost all situations, according to the law.
Should be some sort of life insurance for this kind of shit. I mean calculated risks and all. Human nature can't be helped.
I think I worded it wrong. Thus sparking the out rage.
I said we need to get some clarification on where people are coming from. I was explaining one side of the coin, responding to someone saying they had it coming.
Feel free to contribute what your mindset is, in regards to positions. Like I said in the last part of the post, if we had everyone be clear about what they are saying, it would lead to a productive exchange. Your assumptions are way off, which is why I think people can say implicitly what they mean, or where they are coming from. Thats where I was coming from, but its not making a statement about the other side.
and ill work on wording my posts better.
soul creator
Member
This is precisely the attitude we should challenge, since thinking that cheating is "one of the worst nightmares" is not some kind of a universal, inherent biological belief.
You're totally right, she should've known that murder is a normal reaction to cheating, this is her fault.
quickdevilred
Banned
quite frankly that's not enough retribution IMO.
I think the women who cheated should not get custody rights but should still have to pay child support.
I also think if her cheating led to the divorce she should have to pay the husbands cost of her wedding ring and wedding that he paid back, that is expensive and could be up over $40,000
Of course that would never happen, the children would probably still go with the woman and the man would be made to pay her child support.
freenudemacusers
Member
yeah, I have an excel spreadsheet of worst things that can happen to me as a man and cheating is #105
MCtalkfunny
Member
Make it 3000 miles and you got a great story for a dark modern western/road trip movie.
After the Hulk's analysis on rape culture I'm going to just say you should be more mindful of this type of advice. It is one thing to offer this as advice for an individual as a band aid solution that's fine.
But if you think this advice is smart to apply at a national level, it's not. Killing is wrong in general and creating an environment where people second guess themselves on killing should be pushed for. Telling potential victims to not be stupid because of an overreaction doesn't address the issue.
Reasonable and expected are not the samething, its a reasonable expectation that if I go into a bar an act a fool that no one will kick my ass since assault is illegal, but it is expected based on reality and what actually happens fairly commonly in such situations.
Kano on the Phone
Member
Women get all the breaks, huh?
That's my point. The woman who cheated deserved [insert non-extreme negative thing here] but assault is too far is a perfectly valid statement. The woman who dressed in a revealing outfit deserved [insert different non-extreme negative thing here] but rape is too far is not. I feel that it shouldn't be used as an example of victim blaming here because they are two entirely different kinds of victims [one did something wrong and the other didn't] and equating them in such a way only perpetuates the idea that dressing in such a way = doing something wrong.
That is the issue, it is a common normal reaction, rather wrong or right is irrelevant to the issue that it is a common response to infidelity. Its is a pretty common sense adage to at least have the possibility in the back of one's head, due to the commonality of it
quickdevilred
Banned
oh for sure it wasn't a reasonable reaction, it was a psychotic reaction, the guy was likely a sociopath
but its less surprising that this happened than it would have been if this guy hadn't been sleeping with his wife.
quickdevilred
Banned
they do when it comes to children, and it actually is as a result of our patriarchal society.
Judges think women are better care givers naturally so they want to give them the children, sometimes even if the father has a better case they will give him away to the mother and make him pay her way more than she needs.
Because the guy was not forced to murder. He chose to do it by his own will. Cheating doesn't force a person to kill.
Kano on the Phone
Member
Ok, agreed, and what does that have to do with the murderous love triangle thing?
They really aren't different though, victim blaming is victim blaming and I think that's the point, not to mention that there isn't a good negative fill in the blank for "a scantily clad woman deserves _____."
Because, as has been stated, the two victims are not to blame for the assault/murder.
JetBlackPanda
Member
stupid all around, if your wife is cheating on you, leave her ass. Simple as that.
It is? I'm pretty sure there's a lot of guys not killing their cheaty wives and in general more adultery than murder (please somebody get us some numbers). This idea that somehow an adultery situation turning into a bloodbath is common seems like bollokcs to me.
The only person in the wrong here is the husband. GAF is overly sensitive about cheating and think cheaters are the scum of the earth, right up there with pedos and homophobes, when its really just a morality issue.
I don't think accusing someone of racism or accusing them of condoning murder is a good way to argue or discuss anything.
You're just going to drive the wedge further in between 'groups'.
That's just generally my opinion. I seriously doubt any of the people laying some of the blame at the feet of the wife think the husband shouldn't be charged with everything he has (or will be) charged with.
IDK it just seems like more and more on the internet people have found their clique and are just getting more and more radical because anything that challenges them is racism or victim-blaming or some other one-liner that is used to dismiss something entirely.
Now sometimes the cries of racism, victim-blaming are fair ones but more and more it just seems like a way to dismiss an opinion out of hand because who wants to have their opinions challenged anymore?
Oh and stuff like this:
Because clearly if you don't agree with malyce and his/her clique, you believe cheating is on par with pedophiles.
Fenderputty
Banned
Because she didn't pull or force him to pull the trigger.
Haha, what the fuck is this?
quickdevilred
Banned
not much I was just giving a closing comment on why I think divorce really isn't a penalty to a cheating woman.
I mean if shes cheating do you really think she cares if you get divorced? That would probably make her happy. I tend to think people who do bad things deserve some kind of comeuppance...
Of course I don't mean murder when I say this.
Devolution
Member
Interesting you assume malyce is a woman.
That would be my choice. With the main blame lying on the murderer. But it's not like the other two behaved like angels either.
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