Scott Manley to the rescue!
In short, tilt slightly almost immediately after takeoff, follow the prograde marker, aiming to be at ~45 degrees at 10 km up. Once you break 70km apoapsis, kill the engines and circularize as normal. Do not point your ship much outside of the prograde marker or it's easy to spin out of control. It's actually easier to get into space now than before since it's ~1000 less dV, you just have to unlearn some old habits.
Nice that video should help and yeah it looks like my problem is some bad habits. I was starting the gravity turn too late or going too aggressively and losing control. Thanks for the link.