I'm probably just being paranoid, but you are a junior and I wouldn't risk it if I were you.
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LGBThread |OT3| Friends of Dorothy!
- Thread starter Sai-kun
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I'm probably just being paranoid, but you are a junior and I wouldn't risk it if I were you.
I was paranoid enough posting it that you've convinced me to play it safe.
Oh, and hi GayGAF.
Devolution
Member
I got it.
i think he means that you being selfish because you are hoarding all men and women available, leaving nothing for anyone else.
i do not agree with that, i'm just trying to get inside his mind, and i'd like to get out of it asap <.<
shanshan310
Member
Anaron must be really sexy.
wait, whaaa? My friend proposed that ridiculous notion, not me.
but I am really sexy tho
i think shanshan meant that your friend was calling you selfish and if he means that you are selfish because you'd be hoarding all women and men, you must be really sexy.
this of course implies that your friend was talking about you being bisexual.
i'm going to be gaygaf official thoughts translator <.<
runlikehell
Banned
My thoughts exactly...
but everything's getting lost in translation!
lemme clarify:
First off, I'm gay. My friends and I were discussing general sexuality and by extension, bisexuality. When that was specifically brought up, one of our other friends then proceeded to react like an idiot and provided the previously mentioned idiotic response.
but everything's getting lost in translation!
lemme clarify:
First off, I'm gay. My friends and I were discussing general sexuality and by extension, bisexuality. When that was specifically brought up, one of our other friends then proceeded to react like an idiot and provided the previously mentioned idiotic response.
Well that's less fun. I will choose to live in Shan's world where you are the sexiest creature in creation, able to summon sexual partners with a flick of a wrist.
I'll live there too!
HolyBaikal
Banned
Seconded. Oh so seconded.
Yeah, I've never understood that sort of mentality at all.
To me that's like saying you have to pick one race or something and never date anyone else. Or nationality or something like that for that matter. Once you date someone from France, you can never date someone from Germany. That's selfish, you have to pick one. Once you date a 29 year old, you can never date a 32 year old.
Those are a bit extreme examples, and not the same as gender or whatever. But I don't see why someone should arbitrarily limit which gender they date if they're attracted to both. In my opinion, the more options you have, the better.
Perhaps I sound silly and my comparison was terrible and borderline offensive, since gender is little like race or nationality, much less age. I was attempting to think of something similarly ridiculous.
I often use the example of hair colour when people ask about my sexual preferences. I like red heads, brunettes, blondes, etc. But just because I am with a blonde does not mean I need a redhead too. It also mean in future I may date a redhead, but the hair colour will probably not be a feature that has much importance attached to it.
haha i have news for you
Hello! Nice to see a fellow Dota'r.
If I had to guess - I think part of this arises from the political discourse surrounding sexuality. Really, the fight has mostly centred on homosexuals and a lot of the argument is 'we're born this way' and 'it's not a choice.'
The unfortunate side effect of this approach is it creates a false dichotomy. Almost implicit in the argument is that there are two distinct camps: heterosexuality and homosexuality. A gay person can no more choose their attractions as can a straight. Thus, the gay rights fight is a fight for acceptance for who they are because nothing is going to change this fundamental aspect of nature.
But then bisexuality throws a wrench in the works. It shatters the simple 0 and 1 distinction of sexuality by creating a complicated and messy scale. It also provides a rather gross argument that people could choose their attraction and with enough pressure could adopt a "normal" heterosexual lifestyle. Everyone who doesn't is just weak willed or sinful. It can also develop a sense of betrayal when the gay rights are trying to create a feeling of solidarity. Here are people that can choose to have sex with guys (or girls) and then go back to their relatively safe heteronormative lifestyle and not face the constant persecution of the real "gays." They could have their cake and eat it too. I think this is what gestates into the "pick a side" argument that I've heard here and there as well as a lot of the unpleasant stereotypes of bisexuals on both sides of the fence.
Granted, I think as the LGBT movement gains more traction and acceptance, these views also start to melt away.
shanshan310
Member
I hope so.
As a side note, I always thought your avatar was a cute rabbit for some reason... then I looked closer.
D:
Well, yeah, I'm a firm believer that if the right woman comes to my life I'd fall in love with her, as I'm (rarely, but happens) sexually atracted to some women, hell, I've been aroused to Emma Watson pics
. But I'm in no rush, I love my BF and I like the life I'm having, and I could live all gay and happy my whole life.
; ; but isn't he cute?
Well, yeah, I'm a firm believer that if the right woman comes to my life I'd fall in love with her, as I'm (rarely, but happens) sexually atracted to some women, hell, I've been aroused to Emma Watson pics
But I'm in no rush, I love my BF and I like the life I'm having, and I could live all gay and happy my whole life.
Lock him up boys!
I'm curious - if you did meet the right woman and decided to live with her, would you still call yourself gay?
I mean, the label really doesn't mean much. I think I'm mostly confused why someone would get offended for being asked about it when the label doesn't fit. Especially when there is another label you could use that a lay person would understand.
Sure, I don't think I'd stop liking men hahah now that I think of it, it would be hell for my potential woman partner. Think she should be liberal enough?
Hah, I guess if she's the right one then she would be.
But, yeah, I've gotten the 'I wouldn't date a bi dude because I'm worried he'd run off with a guy' bit before.
Hah, I guess if she's the right one then she would be.
But, yeah, I've gotten the 'I wouldn't date a bi dude because I'm worried he'd run off with a guy' bit before.
The other way around is my own irrational fear of dating a bi guy, or maybe rational, I don't think I'd be able to compete with a woman, she will win.
Mystic Theurge
Member
It's irrational.
Relationships aren't a competition.
Relationships aren't a competition.
shanshan310
Member
What is so different than competing with other men? Not that relationship should be seen as a competition anyway, not a very healthy outlook.
Dead Prince
Banned
...saw this and thought of you all
hi there
Its not really any different to competing with other men
i'm not so sure that it's the same as competing with other men. you're fulfilling his attraction to men. you're not a woman so you couldn't be fulfilling his attraction to women.
it may be an irrational fear in a loving relationship, but i wouldn't say the insecurity is baseless because you're competing equally with other men and women.
SpaceBridge
Member
That's what happened to me with my first "BF". I'm very wary of bi guys, it's irrational and probably not a healthy viewpoint, but it's a defense mechanism that grew from the emotional pain and hurt from that one relationship.
Doesn't help that most of the bi guys I've met seem to be douchey "trade"-like who retain a sense of superiority over gay men because they are supposedly more "straight".
Edit: just to clarify, this purely anecdotal on my part and I'm sure not a reflection of bi men in general. I've just interacted with a lot assholes in my time.
The insecurity in dating bi guys tends to work both ways I've found. I've had past girlfriends wonder if a male acquaintance is really just a friend or something more, and the last guy I dated had concerns about my attraction to women too. lol, sometimes you just can't win. I do wonder if bisexual women have it better.
Mystic Theurge
Member
Guess bi people should just stick to dating bi people, I guess.
*seductive head nod*
How you doin'?
umop_3pisdn
Member
Most of the guys I've been with or have been attracted to have been bi, it's kind of weird.
umop_3pisdn
Member
I'm gay, though. Unless you're saying that bi guys are sexier, which for some reason I would believe for completely irrational reasons.^^I've never met any but apparently that's the usual for bi peeps
I'd date you mantidor and I promise I'd be faithful.
Probably not.
Though I'm sure they'd get more offers from their partner for threesomes.
god damn, i fucking love tricia helfer. She's so beautiful, it's unreal.
Those are great. Your boyfriend is amazing.
I'm shocked whenever gay people call out bisexual people for their orientation. Many times I read comments that, if only one would change word "bisexual" into "gay", read like something one could hear from conservatives politicians, i.e. that bi-guys are unfaithful, slutty, sexually greedy and overall icky. It's sad that people that have to deal with intolerance and lack of understanding about their sexual orientation on everyday basis can be such ignorant and intolerant dicks themselves. :/
umop_3pisdn
Member
Oh, duh, lolNah, I was referring to the post above yours. Whoops.
Is this the part where we do the secret bi handshake?
Mystic Theurge
Member
So secret that I don't even know it!
*tilts right hand in a 45 degree angle and crosses pinky and thumb*
That's not a handy.
Yeah, I think the one that still gets me is when someone tries to argue bisexuality doesn't exist. You would think having gone through the whole "homosexuality isn't real" thing would have built some perspective.
umop_3pisdn
Member
No u! <3
SpaceBridge
Member
^^I've never met any but apparently that's the usual for bi peeps.
But it's not cheating because the plumbing's different!
.
I don't get this unless my sarcasm detector is broken.
RatskyWatsky
Hunky Nostradamus
Oh gosh I'm blushing!
I'd give it a shot if we weren't 8000 km away heh
Yeah I admit it is pretty irrational to be afraid of dating by guys. That sensation of not being able to "compete" with the other genre is more lack of self esteem to be honest.
Yeah it's a very weird stigma, the first gay guy I admitted feelings for turned me away because he took issue with my being bi. Threw me for a loop.
SpaceBridge
Member
But are you bi?
I identified more strongly as such as the time (4 years ago). I still feel attracted towards women now and again, but the instances are fewer and farther between than they used to be. I still sort of think of myself as bi, but gay might be more accurate to describe how I currently feel.
Maybe I have it all wrong, but I've always found it kind of frustrating trying to apply labels to such a fluid concept (at least in my own case).
SpaceBridge
Member
I used to call myself bi back in the day as means to not fully come out. Sorta like a shield. I wonder how many ppl do the same?
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