People who are constantly late

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malingenie said:
I've lost friends over 10 minutes. I have deadlines and their selfishness is aggravating. Just talking about this bends me out of shape.
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It bends me out of shape too but in the opposite direction. Good for whomever you lost. I could never be friends with anyone that uptight.

None of my friends are always on time. It's just assumed in gatherings that someone will be 10 minutes late. Sometimes it's me. Sometimes it's not me. Sometimes it's actually all of us. It's never a big deal.
 
My best Bud is always late and its annoying sometimes, i remember always being late to high school because I was waiting for him to get up or take a shower, same when we went to college. Still my best friend but he needs a kick in the ass sometimes.
 
Lothar said:
It bends me out of shape too but in the opposite direction. Good for whomever you lost. I could never be friends with anyone that uptight.

None of my friends are always on time. It's just assumed in gatherings that someone will be 10 minutes late. Sometimes it's me. Sometimes it's not me. Sometimes it's actually all of us. It's never a big deal.
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RIGHT?!

It's not like you're a fucking transplant surgeon waiting on some 12 y/os replacement kidney, calm the hell down mr. poopy pants.

(unless you are, in which case I will try to be on time)
 
TickleMeElbow said:
LOL!

I was always the last kid left at tennis practice, just waiting there on a bench for 30 mins. At piano lessons I would have to sit on my teacher's couch reading her son's comic books until the next student was like halfway through their own lesson. After swimming class I would play ping pong by myself in the rec room (I'd fold one side of the ping pong table up so I could bounce the ball against it).
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This is so sad.
 
malingenie said:
I've lost friends over 10 minutes. I have deadlines and their selfishness is aggravating. Just talking about this bends me out of shape.
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I mean, I guess. 10 minutes just isn't a big deal to me I can look at GAF on my phone for 10 minutes and keep myself busy. Obviously if you are talking about a professional situation and the tardiness delays your work towards your deadline that's an issue...but why even make social plans if you have a deadline coming up where 10 minutes delay will fuck everything up? Seems an odd thing to end friendships over.

Like I get it, couple years ago I was REALLY into a girl and we went on a few dates but had to end it because she was consistently 30-45 minutes late every time with no excuse. And I really liked her but couldn't handle the late shit. But unless I'm doing something that has a strict start time, I really couldn't give a fuck about 5-10 minutes here or there.
 
Late people drive me up the wall. I left a girlfriend who was thinking marriage over this. Constantly late for everything, work, movies, dinner, you name it. Final straw was the wedding of a lifelong friend, she was a solid hour late getting ready, so we were a solid hour late to the wedding. Turns out the priest was late himself so we did not miss anything, so she laughed it off like "no harm, no foul." I did not agree, so I played nice throughout the festivities, and broke up with her the next day. Found the whole thing very inconsiderate and narcissistic.
 
If somebody is always late, give them an earlier starting time. Either they show up when you originally wanted them to, or they are early in which case you can get some fun payback.
 
King Gilga said:
Yes? It obviously is?
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I'm talking strictly professional environments here attending meetings etc, ive known people cancel a meeting because people where 5 minutes late, they got bollocked by the sales manager over that, it says a lot about people if you schedule a meeting and cannot arrive at the agreed time.


Socially I'm easy going about meet ups just don't leave me hanging for hours on my own.
 
jessa-girls-breakup-square-w352.jpg
 
I'm always like 5-10 minutes late. I was one hour late to a date once.
I still got some believe it or not.
 
shnurgleton said:
Yes. I was conditioned at an early age to always be at least a few minutes early.
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Same here. My father made sure of this. I tend to think that one of the reasons my parents divorced was because of my mother and how she tended to be late for things on a consistent basis.
 
My wife it this way, she makes us late to most events we go to. This morning for example, we were planning to carpool to drop off the kids at school and to head into work since we have plans after and want to take 1 car. She got up at her normal time and got ready in the same amount of time it normally takes her. Keep in mind she normally leaves to work 20 or so mins after me and this wasn't an option today in order to get to work on time. I had to rush getting everything done this morning so we could leave on time. Shit pisses me off and if I bring it up, then I'm the asshole.

I sometimes show up late to the bar or social things like that, but I try not to be in most cases, especially for important events.
 
Daffy Duck said:
I'm talking strictly professional environments here attending meetings etc, ive known people cancel a meeting because people where 5 minutes late, they got bollocked by the sales manager over that, it says a lot about people if you schedule a meeting and cannot arrive at the agreed time.


Socially I'm easy going about meet ups just don't leave me hanging for hours on my own.
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Well professionally any tardiness looks bad. But that's a completely separate thing altogether.
 
Have a good friend named Tori. Tori is always late. Always. I've known her for two years now and every single time we make plans, she arrives 30ish minutes after the agreed upon time. Movies are impossible. Shows miss the first act. Don't even get me started on reservations.

That's why I now plan for TT. ToriTime. We have to be somewhere 30 min away at noon? Meet me at my place at 11, Tori.

It's starting to work.
 
Yes, people being late annoys me to no end. Especially people who are chronically late. ESPECIALLY people who are consistently 10-15 minutes late every day. WHY DON'T YOU JUST WAKE UP 10-15 MINUTES EARLIER?

At my job, you can come in up to 5 minutes late without being considered tardy. Naturally, because of this, everyone considers 8:05 their actual start time. Makes my blood boil.
 
GAF even has a lateness defense force.

Being late consistently = being a selfish prick. I don't mean a few minutes late, but if you are making people wait all the time you're a real dick.
 
I have a kid in my class who is late every single day. It's a commuter school, so I don't get on kids for being late, but neither do I excuse it. If you miss material it's your job to make it up, not mine. Today he came up to me to apologize for being late and explained that he lives 40 minutes away and that's why he's always late.

I asked why he didn't leave earlier and he said that it was the traffic that was making him late. Huh? No, it's you not leaving early enough that's making you late, if you hit traffic every day then your commute isn't 40 minutes, it's an hour+. The concept was beyond him, he was truly puzzled by what I was saying.
 
Opposite problem. I'm always WAY too early.
Usually because I don't have more than one thing going on and I hate sitting at me house waiting.

Part of it is that I go to lots of local art and comedy shows and they don't want to start until there are enough people and you have no Idea when that will be. So If I show up to a 7pm show at 630, they don't start until 730 and if I show up at 7, it's full and I missed it.
 
marrec said:
So, for you people who get all bent out of shape at late people, what if they're just like.... 5 or 10 minutes late?
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5-10 isn't really late so that's fine. Over 15 is what I don't like. When it's a few times its okay, repeated offenders or those that don't contact you that they'll be late is what bugs me the most. Those are the people I don't invite to things or wait till they tell me they are already there.
 
Sulik2 said:
I used to be incredibly punctual. IBS as I have gotten older has pretty much made that impossible for me. If I have to be somewhere in the morning and absolutely cannot be late I have to be up four to five hours early so if I have a morning attack I can get past it to be on time. And even then, its sometimes not enough. I know its bad form and annoys people, but I can't really help it. I always communicate if I'm going to be late though.
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I'm this as well, only I finally nailed down my (fingers crossed one and only) trigger food so it happens way less often. Eating something dicey at a restaurant (not supposed to have trigger food but it does anyway) can put me down for a week or two. Taking completely unrelated medication that has an undisclosed side effect can be really bad. Sorry, but I'm not leaving my position five steps away from a toilet until I'm sure that it is over.

My spouse and kid are the perpetually late types that don't even care that they're late where I have to always add 15-30 minutes to getting ready time and stand over them like a hawk while they do so that they don't get distracted. It is wearying.
 
consistently being late is something I will break up friendships over. I will tolerate 5-10 minutes but if the average is around 20 over a few years it's byebye, especially so if the person never calls to inform me of the delay.
 
ElectricBlanketFire said:
My wife makes us late to everything...but it's a double-edged sword. If it's something I don't want to go to, I don't stress at all, don't mention what time it is, etc...
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pretty much. and im convinced the only reason she bought me an xbox is so i can be distracted while she's running extremely late and not harassing her about how late she is.
 
I will never understand people who are consistently late. My brother and I would get mad at our mom all the time as children because she would never show up when she said she would. It's one of the most irritating things a person can do (and I don't mean like 5-10 minutes late but 30-60+ minutes late).
 
marrec said:
So, for you people who get all bent out of shape at late people, what if they're just like.... 5 or 10 minutes late?
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If they're always that late, I'd be annoyed, because that's basically saying "oh I could make adjustments to get here on time but it's not worth the extra effort on my part."

Bonus points to the people who arrive late but never apologize. They act like the world only moves when they're observing it.
 
It's not a big deal for casual gatherings or parties, but it's really inconsiderate in other circumstances. If we have dinner reservations and you show up an hour late, you are an asshole. If we had plans to meet at my house at 8 PM so we could ride together to meet other friends at 8:30, and at 8 PM you call and tell me you are an hour away... Ugh.. why do I hang out with you?
 
i'm the late one, but I don't ever attend events that have strict starting times if I'm responsible for getting myself there - either meetup with people beforehand or don't go.

I also don't hang out with people who get bent out of shape about being late. at this point, my entire circle of close friends is consistently late to everything, yet somehow we still hold one another in high regard.

tl;dr - either don't schedule these friends for drop-dead go-no-go times, or relax.
 
There are friends of mine that I've known for 20 years who are habitually late to everything, whereas I'm a five-minutes-early kinda guy.

These days I always bring a book and enjoy catching up on my reading, we always arrange to meet somewhere where I can get a pint or a coffee. One of my friends got so embarrassed when I explained that I always had a book because he was always late that these days he's usually only mildly late.

If it's something critically important like a wedding/funeral/flight, I'll arrange to meet the habitually late people there, I'm not letting them make me late too. Fortunately my wife is punctual like me so we get along fine. Until our daughter arrived, anyway! :D
 
ElectricBlanketFire said:
My wife makes us late to everything...but it's a double-edged sword. If it's something I don't want to go to, I don't stress at all, don't mention what time it is, etc...
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This. She has this idea that it's actually rude to show up on time (unless it's some kind of formal appointment, business meeting, etc.). This is for parties or family gatherings, etc etc. If we're meeting someone somewhere at a certain time or something she's not bad.

Uh, no. Maybe it's rude to show up SUPER early like 30 minutes early before guests are expected somewhere. But I'm pretty sure showing up super late is worse in most situations.

Like I said above, there's a distinction between a larger gathering where you're not a focal point, and times when you're supposed to specifically meet someone somewhere. For the latter, I don't have a big issue if people are "casually" late like 5 minutes, maaaybe 10. But we have some friends that are chronically 30-45 minutes late everywhere they go without fail, even if where we're going is 5 minutes from their house. Of course during this time usually they are incommunicado failing to pick up phones.
 
I've stopped hanging out with two friends because they were chronically late. It wasn't the only reason but it was a symptom of their overall selfishness that just made me not care about inviting them out.
marrec said:
So, for you people who get all bent out of shape at late people, what if they're just like.... 5 or 10 minutes late?
Click to expand...
If it's constantly I just assume it's intentional and you don't care about being places on time. That would probably piss me off.

If it's occasionally I don't even consider them late. Shit happens sometimes and you get held up.
 
I hate people who are constantly late. One of my relatives is especially bad at this and recently she even showed up too late for a funeral.
 
prag16 said:
Like I said above, there's a distinction between a larger gathering where you're not a focal point, and times when you're supposed to specifically meet someone somewhere. For the latter, I don't have a big issue if people are "casually" late like 5 minutes, maaaybe 10. But we have some friends that are chronically 30-45 minutes late everywhere they go without fail, even if where we're going is 5 minutes from their house. Of course during this time usually they are incommunicado failing to pick up phones.
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So much this. It's a matter of how central they are to the gathering, I look at it that what defines how rude it is is how long it takes for someone to notice you aren't there, and whether you've left them standing around like a lemon. If it's a party with sixty people, odds are no one will notice if you are half an hour late- they'll just assume you might have arrived and be talking to someone else. If it's three of you meeting before catching a train or a film or whatever, then yes, it's rude to be late because after about ten minutes their conversation is going to be focused on where you are and you're also closing the window before they are directly affected by your inability to keep an arrangement.

Last year I met up with a friend, and after my wife and I had just had our first child it was my first couple of hours out without the baby in months, and I knew I had to get back home relatively early. My friend was an hour late, which meant nothing to him but felt like a total waste of time to me. Normally I don't care as I'm used to it but I was pretty pissed off. Once I explained to him he realised that 'sorry bro' didn't really cut it when actually I really needed a friend then to vent some personal stuff at. It's all good now though. His wife is now pregnant too so I think he's going to see where I was coming from soon enough!
 
I have a couple of friends who are like this. The trick I learn is that if we're all gathering someplace at a certain time, I tell everyone "be there at 2:00". But then I tell the chronically late people "be there at 1:30".
 
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