RustyNails
Member
:lol
Only you're Optimus, obviously.
So Pregnacy... From Rice grain to Watermelon...
- Thread starter Renoir
- Start date
- Status
It's not really a big deal. I was there for my kid's birth. I even was there to watch two of my sisters be born. Childbirth is amazing to watch.
Our second kid had to be a c-section. That was uncomfortable to watch.
Seriously. GAF never disappoints.
Pro tip: pregnancy and childbirth is nothing like what you see on tv.
Edit to be helpful - yes they are kinda real. But it usually isn't for weird shit like pickles and ice cream. For my first my wife craved steak all the time. For the second she wanted junk foods and candy. For the third she hasn't wanted anything unusual but many foods smell rotten to her without actually being rotten.
It all changes every time. Keeps it fun.
Edit to be helpful - yes they are kinda real. But it usually isn't for weird shit like pickles and ice cream. For my first my wife craved steak all the time. For the second she wanted junk foods and candy. For the third she hasn't wanted anything unusual but many foods smell rotten to her without actually being rotten.
It all changes every time. Keeps it fun.
The only real craving my wife got was for sweets. She really really wanted sweets all the time. She also ended up liking chocolate, which before she never really cared for.
User 100115
Banned
Yes they are. I craved green chile my entire first pregnancy. Nothing really specific the second and third.
Renoir
Member
Did it bug you out not to get your craving satisfied.. or you was just like.
"deal with it"mode
what are the myths...
the craving is a good one. which i think turn out to be true from what your saying.
Is the mood swing thing real? or just something so woman can get away with being asshole?
how long does it take fro the mother and the baby to come back home?
Mood swings definitely happen. Things are going crazy in the mother's body, both physically and psychologically. And just in generally it can be a very stressful time. In my case, we both lost our tempers perhaps more than we should have. And in the case of my wife, this didn't really end after birth. She had a mild case of post partum depression.
After my first baby was born, everyone came home after one day. The second baby was a c-section, so my wife stayed in the hospital about 3 days, I think. Seemed shorter than I would have thought.
Be also prepared for tons of unsolicited advice, and everyone telling you what you should and should not eat. My wife's parents are chinese, and we got all this questionable folk advice, which ended up really annoying my wife.
For our first baby as well my wife went into premature labor, and had to stay in the hospital for 2 months. I basically slept there for those two months. Really tough time, and something of an extreme example, but things are tough. Be prepared.
Icefire1424
Member
Wife and I just had our first child 10 weeks ago, some personal observations / input from the pregnancy:
Child birthing classes really do help. A lot. Pretty basic stuff, but really prepares you for everything that is going to happen. Tips on how to make mom more comfortable as she progresses in the pregnancy, to what you should expect during labor. Most hospitals / ob/gyn practices should have information on class availability. Most will also offer a basic childcare class to go over stuff like changing diapers, feeding, giving kiddo a bath, that stuff. Recommended. (Although my wife got pissed at me during our class because as she was trying to change the diaper on the "doll", I made the doll fight back a bit. Had to raise that bar.)
Get mom a birthing ball (think of it as a large yoga ball). The thing was a godsend the last couple months of wife's pregnancy when she had difficulty getting comfy. Sat on the thing for hours, and makes it easy for me to rub her back when she needed it. Already said, but don't neglect the feet.
During labor, be with her the whole time. Be supportive, be encouraging. Help her along. Hold her hand, kiss her forehead. She won't be comfortable, but you being there will make all the difference in the world.
Post delivery - sleep whenever kiddo does. The first few weeks your sleep schedules will be completely jacked up. Whenever baby falls asleep, get some shuteye. It will make those overnight feedings just a bit easier.
Most importantly though, talk with your S/O about anything that's going on, and encourage her to do the same. Both of you will feel anxious, excited, nervous, scared, happy...pretty much the full range of emotion. Being open with how you feel will help you two work through the pregnancy and everything to follow. Keep the lines of communication open, and discuss any hesitations you might be feeling.
Congrats OP, you'll do great.
Edit:
Heh, about the craving thing, I do remember making a few late night runs to the grocery store for some odd stuff. Froot Loops and an ice cream cake come to mind.
Wife and daughter were in the hospital for about 48 hours for a natural birth. Would've been out after a day, but kiddo was a bit jaundiced (yellowed skin, pretty normal), which they wanted to keep an eye on, and make sure she was eating enough. Just took her a day to get the hang of the feeding thing.
Child birthing classes really do help. A lot. Pretty basic stuff, but really prepares you for everything that is going to happen. Tips on how to make mom more comfortable as she progresses in the pregnancy, to what you should expect during labor. Most hospitals / ob/gyn practices should have information on class availability. Most will also offer a basic childcare class to go over stuff like changing diapers, feeding, giving kiddo a bath, that stuff. Recommended. (Although my wife got pissed at me during our class because as she was trying to change the diaper on the "doll", I made the doll fight back a bit. Had to raise that bar.)
Get mom a birthing ball (think of it as a large yoga ball). The thing was a godsend the last couple months of wife's pregnancy when she had difficulty getting comfy. Sat on the thing for hours, and makes it easy for me to rub her back when she needed it. Already said, but don't neglect the feet.
During labor, be with her the whole time. Be supportive, be encouraging. Help her along. Hold her hand, kiss her forehead. She won't be comfortable, but you being there will make all the difference in the world.
Post delivery - sleep whenever kiddo does. The first few weeks your sleep schedules will be completely jacked up. Whenever baby falls asleep, get some shuteye. It will make those overnight feedings just a bit easier.
Most importantly though, talk with your S/O about anything that's going on, and encourage her to do the same. Both of you will feel anxious, excited, nervous, scared, happy...pretty much the full range of emotion. Being open with how you feel will help you two work through the pregnancy and everything to follow. Keep the lines of communication open, and discuss any hesitations you might be feeling.
Congrats OP, you'll do great.
Edit:
Heh, about the craving thing, I do remember making a few late night runs to the grocery store for some odd stuff. Froot Loops and an ice cream cake come to mind.
Wife and daughter were in the hospital for about 48 hours for a natural birth. Would've been out after a day, but kiddo was a bit jaundiced (yellowed skin, pretty normal), which they wanted to keep an eye on, and make sure she was eating enough. Just took her a day to get the hang of the feeding thing.
Omegasquash
Member
1) At that last paragraph...Jesus, man. We had to stay for 8 days with my first, and it was hell on Earth. My wife and I look young, and the nurses at the hospital were patronizing to the point where they'd come and take our baby WITHOUT TELLING US WHY. I had a stern talk with some folks there the first (and only) time it happened.
2) At the bolded...ah yes, the "advice." The advice I give is that no one knows your baby better than you and the mother, and the doctor. Go with what you feel, always act in the best interest of the baby, and you'll do just fine.
User 100115
Banned
Cravings are real, and depending on the emotional status when the craving hits, it can be a bit depressing if you can't get that one thing. It also sucks HARD when a craving hits that you can't figure out. You just WANT SOMETHING SO BAD OMG. Some women can brush it off like no thing, some have to cry about it or rant and rave. Everyone is different.
Mood swings are real too, yes. You have to remember that hormones are going nuts in a pregnant woman's body. She can get emotional. Again, some women won't have much in the way of mood swings. I am not an angry person at all, so I got super depressed a couple of times, slightly angry others. No, it's not an excuse to be an asshole and no one should use it as such.
How long it takes to come home depends on complications. Usually women are sent home the same day/the next day after birth. My longest hospital stay was four days, and that was after an emergency c-section with uterine tearing 2 months too early. My daughter stayed in the hospital for nearly a month after I was released.
Most births are pretty trouble free though and mom and baby are fine to go home the next day.
This was before the baby came out. She basically went into labor at a crazy early point, and had to go to the hospital be on bed rest, and have an IV feeding magnesium into her bloodstream(which made her dizzy and sick as well). But we got through it, the baby didn't come and we actually got to go back home before she actually gave birth
That was one of the hardest times I have had to deal with. I would go to the hospital every day after work and sleep on a cot in the corner. My wife was very depressed, and very sick from the medicine.
Like I said, it is an extreme example, but get ready to be able to handle something extreme. Parenthood is full of unexpected emergencies.
on the bright side, for me, babies are WAY easier than pregnancies. My wife has really difficult pregnancies.
I read it as his girlfriend was 7 years pregnant.
The Horror the horror
Banned
Keep some distance between your newborn and your parents. Not going to say more than that.
User 100115
Banned
Meh, at least you get to pretend there's an alien inside you when you are super far along and the baby's rolling around is very visible from the outside.
That might just be me though >.<
In my experience, everyone does that.
No, I think you need to say more, especially since you are trying to give advice on the baby's relationship to their grandparents.
Stahsky
A passionate embrace, a beautiful memory lingers.
impetuous_silly
Member
I'm a little worried about your views.
OJdaKiller
Member
Your life, as you know it, is gone forever.
Hot Coldman
Banned
johnny_park
Member
This is an old video but I just saw it since it's making the rounds on Facebook. It's a dad trying to get his daughter to sleep.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MLErNXIYjMg
http://youtube.com/watch?v=MLErNXIYjMg
Renoir
Member
it seems your not the only one.
Of all the books people gave us, Baby 411 was the most useful.
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1889392456/?tag=neogaf0e-20
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1889392456/?tag=neogaf0e-20
TOP SHOTTA
Member
I am already divorced. Are you trying to specifically refute what I am saying? I by NO means said to ever make that woman feel fat. Under no circumstances should you ever do that - in times of bad or in times of good. What I said is make sure she's aware you'll help her through this difficult time with her body. My ex wife never lost the weight, but I didn't pressure her, because I had no fucking clue what to do and neither my books nor my Dad equipped me for that life lesson. I really wish I'd handled that differently.
Part real advice, part object lesson. If you do stuff for her that she can't do, she'll appreciate it and she'll love you for it. And it has been my experience that - yeah - in the shower - women like to be washed, including their asshole. I'm happy to help out.Wash her asshole.
You shouldn't be concerned about your views right now. You're probably nervous and scared, and you want to make it all work. My best Bro-Tip is to make her feel like a woman, and ensure that she makes you feel like a man. Through all of it, if you can keep each other happy this way, you will be fine. I am not concerned about your views. Support her, tell her she's wonderful, beautiful - and dode on her. Don't short change yourself either though, in the process. Be a COUPLE. It's what got you to this point and it is imperative that you remain a loving and romantic couple.
Eye for an Eye
Member
As scary as it all sounds for having a baby in the house, you need to get through the pregnancy first.
Since you've already announced it anonymously to the world, try to follow your girlfriends lead on telling people you actually know. It's most common to tell around the 12th week; after that point it's less likely to miscarry. Be sure you are on the same page with her on who gets to know and when.
Most OBs will have a first visit around the 8 week mark. Go over some of the basics, give a script for prenatal vitamins. Although it's best to just go get some that they sell over the counter. Most of those aren't the horse pills that prescriptions are.
There's usually two ultrasounds. The first is at 12 weeks. Most commonly called an NT scan. The second is at 20 weeks for an anatomy scan. The 20 week one is most important because they check to make sure the heart/brain and all the other organs are developing properly and at the right size. Although most parents go in blindly thinking it's all about finding out the gender.
Some, but not all doctors, will do first and second trimester blood screenings. Purely optional, but it's helpful to make sure everything is going right.
Since you've already announced it anonymously to the world, try to follow your girlfriends lead on telling people you actually know. It's most common to tell around the 12th week; after that point it's less likely to miscarry. Be sure you are on the same page with her on who gets to know and when.
Most OBs will have a first visit around the 8 week mark. Go over some of the basics, give a script for prenatal vitamins. Although it's best to just go get some that they sell over the counter. Most of those aren't the horse pills that prescriptions are.
There's usually two ultrasounds. The first is at 12 weeks. Most commonly called an NT scan. The second is at 20 weeks for an anatomy scan. The 20 week one is most important because they check to make sure the heart/brain and all the other organs are developing properly and at the right size. Although most parents go in blindly thinking it's all about finding out the gender.
Some, but not all doctors, will do first and second trimester blood screenings. Purely optional, but it's helpful to make sure everything is going right.
Vermillion
Banned
All you gotta do is wash her asshole and she's yours forever. Or until you let her know you're aware of the weight gain.
VaultBoy101
Member
Make the transition to single-player games only. The ability to hit Pause will become crucial.
Am I allowed to say that babies are pretty boring? Grabbing your finger etc is fucking heart melting, but generally they don't do much. They get much more interesting once they start crawling and babbling - basically when they're more interactive. Then they're fantastic.
Until then its more about attempting to have some kind of structure to your life, but allowing the baby to fuck that up if they need to. If you're lucky they'll sleep through early on. If not, you just have to find a way to deal with it.
Until then its more about attempting to have some kind of structure to your life, but allowing the baby to fuck that up if they need to. If you're lucky they'll sleep through early on. If not, you just have to find a way to deal with it.
Renoir
Member
So this now the baby is a raspberry. She has an that tells you how far along you are. Compared the fetus to every day things so you know how big is it.
Also her eating pattern is very wild. Some days she's not hungry at all.. Some days she eats little and others she eats the whole day.. is that normal?
Just got a text of the 1st morning throw up.
Also her eating pattern is very wild. Some days she's not hungry at all.. Some days she eats little and others she eats the whole day.. is that normal?
Just got a text of the 1st morning throw up.
Slayer-33
Liverpool-2
My wife is 5months preggers. She gave me "The ecpectant father" and it's a pretty good read. It has a chapter for each month, so could be helpful for you. And don't worry, once baby is there it'll come naturally. You'll get to know your baby and your baby will get to know you as well.
We're on our way to our echography now! We'll get to see if we're having a girl or a boy!!!
We're on our way to our echography now! We'll get to see if we're having a girl or a boy!!!
Well then. I'll give you a bro-tip. If you meet another lady along the way and wish the outcome to be different, don't do what you suggested. Rub her feet is about the only good advice you dished out.
- Don't comment on her weight at all. Especially during the pregnancy. She knows she's getting fat. The doctor is weighing her EVERY SINGLE VISIT. She knows. Afterwards you can help her lose it by encouraging healthier eating and getting up and going on bike rides or walks with her. But it's for her, not for you. Don't think otherwise.
- Sex is on her terms during the pregnancy. Period. She is not there to give you BJs or hand jobs. You are not to pressure her at all with regards to sex. Sometimes the pregnancy will make her very into sex. Sometimes not at all. Resign yourself to some time without sex - during and after the pregnancy. That's the way it is. Maybe some time after the baby is born, when you both have had more than 4 hours of sleep and her body has recovered from pushing a 6-10lb baby out of her vagina, you might resume some normal sexual activity.
A woman has the toughest job in the world carrying a child to term and then birthing the thing. Your one and only job is to support her the entire way through.
My girlfriend is 6 weeks pregnant, and we had a very scary episode last night where she woke up with an agonising burning pain in her tummy. We called paramedics, but by the time they arrived, the pain had subsided. I don't know why I told you that, but I understand your fears OP! I'm shitting myself.
Renoir
Member
Fucking hell.
I had the episode where she was spoting. we were going mindless.
Went to ER and all they said it was a normal thing.
I hope all goes well for you bruh.
I agree completely. We have two very good sets of friends who have both had babies in the last year and the first 4-6 months just seem like eat sleep poop, until they start developing cognitive abilities and personality.
Thanks man. If all goes well, it looks as though our babes will be born very close to each other!
But yeah, we were fucking terrified. I thought that was it. The paramedic actually said that it is not necessarily unusual for tummy pains, as the body is still adjusting to its new passenger. Still, I don't want any more of that.
Eleven years ago I had a lot of similar questions as you. Now I'm on the father of four kids including a set of twins, all of our kids were born in a 42 month period of time. Here is my very basic advice:
1) Be glad it is just one, as far as I'm concerned you have already won there. Our oldest had just turned 2 the month before our twins were born. Having twins nearly broke our marriage, we had no outside help at all, I have no memory of the year 2006.
2) Hope you get an easy baby. I'm dead serious with this, there are easy babies and hard babies. Our last was an easy baby, slept through the night in just a few weeks, didn't have bad gas etc. He was a joke compared to the others who were always upset gassy and didn't sleep well at all for months. Even now at 6 the kid is more mellow then his brothers.
3) I was in the same boat with the how do I hold the baby, will they break type stuff before I had my first. You will figure this all out with time, on the job training works best here. Your baby is actually much tougher then you think and they will certainly *try* to let you know they want something.
Funny story.. I had never changed a diaper before, my first try with my wife watching me my son projectile shits all over my arm and the floor.
Twin diaper story... They both had been sick and had decided to have blow out diapers at the same time. My wife wasn't in the house, just sons and I. While changing one the other crawls away from me and proceeds to rip off his diaper half way off and takes off crawling with shit going everywhere. I try to grab him which allows the other to escape still coated in shit. I had two crawling babies covered in shit going in opposite directions.
4) After they get older try to establish a schedule, this is a quite a ways off for you but we found having a good schedule, bedtime routine etc helps so much.
5) Learn to turn the focus away from yourself. I put my sons first. I've given up some career things because it would have damaged my home life etc. I'd like a bigger house and I could afford it but with the one I have now I can put them through college, etc etc.
Finally in closing... it is worth it, you will be amazed at how fun/interesting/weird/random your life will be. For me its only gotten more interesting as they have gotten older. Now with a 10, 8,8 and almost 7 year old we have so much fun. Good luck.
1) Be glad it is just one, as far as I'm concerned you have already won there. Our oldest had just turned 2 the month before our twins were born. Having twins nearly broke our marriage, we had no outside help at all, I have no memory of the year 2006.
2) Hope you get an easy baby. I'm dead serious with this, there are easy babies and hard babies. Our last was an easy baby, slept through the night in just a few weeks, didn't have bad gas etc. He was a joke compared to the others who were always upset gassy and didn't sleep well at all for months. Even now at 6 the kid is more mellow then his brothers.
3) I was in the same boat with the how do I hold the baby, will they break type stuff before I had my first. You will figure this all out with time, on the job training works best here. Your baby is actually much tougher then you think and they will certainly *try* to let you know they want something.
Funny story.. I had never changed a diaper before, my first try with my wife watching me my son projectile shits all over my arm and the floor.
Twin diaper story... They both had been sick and had decided to have blow out diapers at the same time. My wife wasn't in the house, just sons and I. While changing one the other crawls away from me and proceeds to rip off his diaper half way off and takes off crawling with shit going everywhere. I try to grab him which allows the other to escape still coated in shit. I had two crawling babies covered in shit going in opposite directions.
4) After they get older try to establish a schedule, this is a quite a ways off for you but we found having a good schedule, bedtime routine etc helps so much.
5) Learn to turn the focus away from yourself. I put my sons first. I've given up some career things because it would have damaged my home life etc. I'd like a bigger house and I could afford it but with the one I have now I can put them through college, etc etc.
Finally in closing... it is worth it, you will be amazed at how fun/interesting/weird/random your life will be. For me its only gotten more interesting as they have gotten older. Now with a 10, 8,8 and almost 7 year old we have so much fun. Good luck.
While it's a funny video, I feel the need to say that you should not put bumpers in the crib.
The AAP's guidance is nothing in the crib with the baby. No blankets, no bumpers. Just the baby and what the baby is wearing. At least for a newborn. Once they can roll over (both directions), you can start putting blankets in.
And I have totally considered doing what the guy in the video did. I have slept on the floor of the baby's room (when baby was sick).
Prepare yourself for - possibly - the biggest life changing time of your life. But you've got plenty of time to learn and it's a situation where all new parents have to learn on the job.
Be patient. Take care of your SO and the baby as best you can and take some time for yourself. Ask people for help and advice if you are struggling, but be careful with some of the weird/out-there ideas some people have on childcare and child rearing.
Trust your instincts too.
Mine's near four and is tonnes of fun and a great little gamer. Nintendo games are tops for gamer parents.
EDIT: Funny nappy story - kid was nearly two on a Ryanair flight on the way back from Portugal and she had a very bad case of the runs. Oh god the stench. I'm so lucky that I had two seats free beside me so I could constantly change her. I feel sorry for the other passengers on the plane.
Be patient. Take care of your SO and the baby as best you can and take some time for yourself. Ask people for help and advice if you are struggling, but be careful with some of the weird/out-there ideas some people have on childcare and child rearing.
Trust your instincts too.
Mine's near four and is tonnes of fun and a great little gamer. Nintendo games are tops for gamer parents.
EDIT: Funny nappy story - kid was nearly two on a Ryanair flight on the way back from Portugal and she had a very bad case of the runs. Oh god the stench. I'm so lucky that I had two seats free beside me so I could constantly change her. I feel sorry for the other passengers on the plane.
Oh, one other thing on the gaming front.
The AAP's guidance on "screens" is to limit the baby's exposure to things like TV and phones until around age 2.
http://www.aap.org/en-us/advocacy-and-policy/aap-health-initiatives/Pages/Media-and-Children.aspx
I have a 2.5 year old and 5-month old twins.
The TV and Xbox are unplugged. We even "cut the cord" and turned off our cable TV service. Only have internet now.
My only game time now is on my phone, and is very limited.
One more thing, is your GF going to be a stay at home mom? Or are you going to be a stay at home dad? If both are going to be working, start looking for day care NOW. I am not sure where you live, but in many places the waiting lists for daycare can be absurd.
We put my 2.5 year old on a list before he was born. He's still hasn't gotten in yet.
The AAP's guidance on "screens" is to limit the baby's exposure to things like TV and phones until around age 2.
http://www.aap.org/en-us/advocacy-and-policy/aap-health-initiatives/Pages/Media-and-Children.aspx
I have a 2.5 year old and 5-month old twins.
The TV and Xbox are unplugged. We even "cut the cord" and turned off our cable TV service. Only have internet now.
My only game time now is on my phone, and is very limited.
One more thing, is your GF going to be a stay at home mom? Or are you going to be a stay at home dad? If both are going to be working, start looking for day care NOW. I am not sure where you live, but in many places the waiting lists for daycare can be absurd.
We put my 2.5 year old on a list before he was born. He's still hasn't gotten in yet.
matt360
Member
I think you guys are being too hard on Shotta. Gaining too much weight during pregnancy is a real problem and is bad for both the mother and the baby. My wife is pregnant right now, and she has very good eating habits, but if she were stuffing herself full of McDonalds and ice cream and junk every single day, it would be irresponsible of me NOT to say anything, as that could harm the baby. The baby's and mother's physical health comes before the emotional needs of the mother. That, and there's absolutely no reason why anyone should be gaining 40, 50, or 60lbs during pregnancy. Maybe that's just the area of Florida where I'm from, but most of my friends' wives seem to pack on some serious weight during their pregnancies.
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