So my mom came home from her coworker's housewarming party and basically helped me breathe through all this shit. She took a look through the pages of the letter that was sent to me, and repeated what others told me: "you ain't getting shit done until Monday, what with those offices being 9-5 paper pushers." She sat me down and said that all I need to do is call the Medi-Cal offices and tell them there was a mix-up since I was never sent to Kaiser, and Kaiser thinks that I'm charging them instead of Medi-Cal.
I have no idea if that's all it's gonna take, but the only thing I know for sure is that I can't do shit until monday. Now where's my asthma medicine...