This is not Reddit. Yet and still, Ask Me Anything

We really need to talk about why you hate Fallout: New Vegas so much. That's right! I was paying attention to that IGN post show! (Never mind, I'm far too late.)

Back on topic, what was the decision process around making the Ubi presser M rated? I didn't mind it cuz I'm an adult, but it was pretty jarring after seeing the other conferences be "clean".

I will be perfectly honest with you. There was no decision process. I am pretty "M Rated" in my regular life. My standup is for grownups, Archer is for grownups, my podcast is for grownups. I had pitched just saying one curse word for the entire show, but then when Dan Hay went out to do Far Cry 4 and said "you're fucked," I pretty much felt like the doors were open.

I don't know if you've paid attention, but 2012 Far Cry 3 trailer had like 90 seconds of straight naked boobs. And also every game EVER is shooting and carnage and nakedness. And also online multiplayer is basically mayhem personified. So my participation was pretty vanilla, all things considered.

I just said the stuff I felt, in the moment I felt them, about games I was excited about. No more complicated than that. I am a standup comedian, and I speak to other adults, in words and concepts they can understand. I won't apologize.

If you want G-rated, check out Nickelodeon.
 
How sick are you of all the passive aggressive manbabies here whining about how unfair you are to Mario and Peach?

What podcasts do you listen to?

Everybody has their something.

Podcasts: Sklarbro Country, Stuff You Should Know, Planet Money, The Business, WTF, Carolla, Nerdist, The Story (until it died), This American Life, Dork Forest
 
Your fantasies about our lives are so much more awesome than real stuff that happens.

Ryan wears like three layers of clothes. I think when he gets in bed he is wearing a kevlar onesie.

We are all old and sometimes complain about having booze too late at night and how it interrupts our sleep patterns and gives us reflux. Although we do all love each other in a very creepy and intimate way.

We are all in love and Colin makes everyone French toast. It is a lovely, creepy family.

You can hear podcasts with me and the guys at girlonguy.net

Ryan: http://girlonguy.net/podcast/girl-on-guy-134-ryan-stiles/
Colin: http://girlonguy.net/podcast/girl-on-guy-bonus-ep-x25-colin-mochrie/
Wayne: http://girlonguy.net/podcast/girl-on-guy-45-wayne-brady/

Favorite Archer moment is Pam on the shitcan while Cyrill is having sex with Cheryl/Carol/Cristal/Cherlene. On the rigid airship. Best thing evarrrrrr.



Thank you so much! :) I'm having somewhat of a shitty day due to anxiety and your response has cheered me up.

P.S. Why don't you and EviLore just get married already, jeeeeez? Aisha Tyler Malka. One name. One love.
 
Oh, I thought of a real question, not sure if already asked and answered.

If you had a nigh unlimited triple-A game budget to spend as you see fit what would be your dream game to make. For bonus points, an answer for original IP and an answer for existing IP would be cool.

Genre, setting, main characters, etc. Just a brief general overview.
E.g. space operatic scifi shooter ARPG set in an alternate reality 2099 where humans evolved from cats. Or steampunk time traveling action adventure, where the MC is a roguish cad with Wolverine claws.
 
I have a bit of a one off question for you; what are your thoughts on divorce? Let's say hypothetically a husband cheats on a wife while they're separated and both parties realize they aren't meant to be together but they still love each other and don't want to pull the trigger for the sake of their child? Do they stay together and try to work through it or just end it?
 
Next Question
Have you have lady fapped to Archer Rule 34 Porn?

Edit: And if so please link it.

I don't need visual aids to lady fap.

Lady fapping is my right as an American. And also a really awesome hobby.

And if you aren't doing it your life is empty and bleak.

SO FIGURE OUT YOUR LIFE!
 
I have a bit of a one off question for you; what are your thoughts on divorce? Let's say hypothetically a husband cheats on a wife while they're separated and both parties realize they aren't meant to be together but they still love each other and don't want to pull the trigger for the sake of their child? Do they stay together and try to work through it or just end it?

Stay together, if you can at all manage it. Monogamy is a construct created by society, not necessarily the natural human state. And marriages hit bumps. That is the nature of things.

I'm not saying you should cheat, or that cheating isn't a terrible thing or a big deal in a marriage. It is. I'm just saying an episode of cheating shouldn't necessarily end a marriage if you love each other and really want to be together. A lifetime together can outweigh a mistake or two. (Or even three, if you are modern and forward thinking and able to work through it).

However. If you hate each other, run for the hills. Life is too short.

I AM NOT A DOCTOR!!!! DO NOT TELL PEOPLE I TOLD YOU WHAT TO DO!!! CALL DOCTOR PHIL!!! OR OPRAH!!! OR YOUR MOM!!!

Interesting podcast on monogamy with the brilliant Dan Savage: http://girlonguy.net/podcast/girl-on-guy-117-dan-savage/
 
I remember last year you were making jokes about your height but you're wearing those 8 inch spikes on your feet.

I'm hoping the new Rainbow isn't going to turn into another Lockdown. That game was bullshit.
 
Okeydoke. There are more posts than anyone could possibly ever hope to respond to, even with the crystal-encrusted staff of Gandalf the White at your side.

I will try to post a little bit more tomorrow morning, as promised, so make your questions count.

Also, thanks everyone for making this thread so incredibly robust. Yay!!! I thought I'd get like seven people on this thing. Even if you are a troll, thanks for contributing.

Also sorry you got kicked off of GAF. It's your own fault.

My main regret today is missing The Order and The Crew haptic cab. Boo me.

nighty night
 
Final Question: My girlfriend gets really sad whenever those farmersonly.com commercials come on because the people in them are totally sad losers and the theme song goes "you don't have to be lonely, at farmersonly.com" but I have to remind her that it's a good thing because now a lot less farm animals are going to have unconsenual sex.

I guess thats not really a question. So uhhh Labyrinth, The Never Ending Story, The Dark Crystal, or Legend?
 
Stay together, if you can at all manage it. Monogamy is a construct created by society, not necessarily the natural human state. And marriages hit bumps. That is the nature of things.

I'm not saying you should cheat, or that cheating isn't a terrible thing or a big deal in a marriage. It is. I'm just saying an episode of cheating shouldn't necessarily end a marriage if you love each other and really want to be together. A lifetime together can outweigh a mistake or two. (Or even three, if you are modern and forward thinking and able to work through it).

However. If you hate each other, run for the hills. Life is too short.

I AM NOT A DOCTOR!!!! DO NOT TELL PEOPLE I TOLD YOU WHAT TO DO!!! CALL DOCTOR PHIL!!! OR OPRAH!!! OR YOUR MOM!!!

Interesting podcast on monogamy with the brilliant Dan Savage: http://girlonguy.net/podcast/girl-on-guy-117-dan-savage/

Wow. You know, I've asked a bunch of people this question over the last few weeks and this is the first response that really connected with me. I appreciate your advice. Yes I know you're not a doctor but you don't need a degree to have a reasonable opinion. Thanks again Aisha.

Best wishes.
 
What's Meryl Streep like in real life ?

Do you keep in touch Gabourey Sidibe ? One of the most talented actresses and Precious was an amazing movie!

Obviously I am asking these cuz of your instagram pics lol
 
Hey Aisha!

I was wondering, was this...

No one has a chance. I am dead inside.

in reference to your struggles with having children? Because, if so....holy shit, you are awesome/hilarious. Pretty damn strong of yourself to be able to upbeat about it!
...yet cry about Rainbow Six Siege ;p


I didn't cry, I just screamed
 
Honestly, that was cooler than I expected. I think there were too many "Who would you fuck" questions but Aisha did a great job.

Thanks Aisha, I agree with you on "New Vegas" but think you're a little too judgmental for "Destiny." More power to you.
As for R6, I couldn't have been more excited when I heard that.
You did a great job on the Ubisoft conference but I do have to say one thing:

Your parts aside, the Ubisoft conference was one of the most depressing things I have seen in a long time. We watched it at work and after every single game trailer someone would yell, "FUCK man!" as if someone had shot their dog. Seriously, each trailer was just plain depressing in theme (though the games looked pretty damned good.)
I think you secretly cried because of that... as much as I too wanted those tears to be for R6.
I wish I could see more AMAs like this one on Gaf, if I'm being honest... because I'm anon on the internets.
 
I swear, reading through all of this was better than watching a comedy.
 
Can a mod give this gorgeous and brilliant woman a fucking title already?

Sheesh. I mean, she totally deserves it.

I'm a fan of your stuff by the way and I think it's awesome you came here to do this.

My question about Ubisoft. Sincerely. Can you encourage them to make a Prince of Persia game? Please?
 
Thanks for joining us. I'm a big fan of Archer, your standup, and especially your intro song to the 'Aisha Tyler is Lit' special.

Judging by the tabs curated from this thread, I'm about to be a big fan of your podcast, too
 
How disappointed were you when you realised that m0dus wasn't Woody Allen?

How relieved were you when you realised that m0dus wasn't Woody Allen?

9ZfZ20D.jpg

Love you, m0dus!
 
Aisha, can you convince Ubisoft to name all the sequels after Assassin's Creed Unity after Rick James songs?

Assassin's Creed Cold Blooded
Assassin's Creed Superfreak
Assassin's Creed Party All The Time feat. Eddie Murphy
 
After this I was hoping to see The Order but the line was like whoa.

Dude... I say this.

'Tried to help that nurse out but she was pissed off like whoa..."
"Coulda made the TooL show on time but traffic was like fuckin whoa..."
"Aisha Tyler got da buns like whoa..."

and so on and so forth. Mainlining Archer after illicit substance abuse this evening all because of you. Proper job being all sorts of fuck-awesome.

And lets say that i kind of jumped the gun on that random hobo killing in your name.... all over Portland..... like.... whoa.
 
Hey Aisha do you do shots before doing the conferences? I can sense a hint of tipsiness when you're on stage.

PM me your answer if you are afraid of reprisals from Ubisoft
 
I will be perfectly honest with you. There was no decision process. I am pretty "M Rated" in my regular life. My standup is for grownups, Archer is for grownups, my podcast is for grownups. I had pitched just saying one curse word for the entire show, but then when Dan Hay went out to do Far Cry 4 and said "you're fucked," I pretty much felt like the doors were open.

I don't know if you've paid attention, but 2012 Far Cry 3 trailer had like 90 seconds of straight naked boobs. And also every game EVER is shooting and carnage and nakedness. And also online multiplayer is basically mayhem personified. So my participation was pretty vanilla, all things considered.

I just said the stuff I felt, in the moment I felt them, about games I was excited about. No more complicated than that. I am a standup comedian, and I speak to other adults, in words and concepts they can understand. I won't apologize.

If you want G-rated, check out Nickelodeon.
I missed the 2012 FC3 trailer. In fact, this year was my first year checking out the Ubi press conference, because I have heard so much good about FC3 (I'll get around to playing it someday...maybe?) and was intrigued by FC4.

I did get the answer I was hoping for, though! Knowing that you pitched the conference with only one curse is just the kind of "inside baseball" thing I love hearing about! I also like knowing that you deviated from your original plan because of the FC4 trailer and Dan Hay's remarks. Behind the scenes stuff like that is pretty cool for a video game fan living in Indiana who has to vicariously imagine the E3 experience!

I loved your enthusiasm and presentation and I thought the conference was great! Like I said, I am an adult so it didn't bother me, but it was a big difference from the other conferences, so I was just curious. Thank you for taking the time to answer my question!
 
Hey Aisha do you do shots before doing the conferences? I can sense a hint of tipsiness when you're on stage.

PM me your answer if you are afraid of reprisals from Ubisoft

Sadly, I am pretty straight edge. No day-drinking before massive internationally-streamed presentations.

That is just me drunk with gaming joy.
 
What's Meryl Streep like in real life ?

Do you keep in touch Gabourey Sidibe ? One of the most talented actresses and Precious was an amazing movie!

Obviously I am asking these cuz of your instagram pics lol

Meryl Streep is like the sun and you should not look into her eyes directly or you will be blinded by the solar flares of her talent.

I see Gabourey often. She's funny and smart and delightful and rad. I am so happy for all of her success.
 
Do you have a particular exercise regimen? People were talking about your physique like crazy, lol. My friend was convinced you were "the girl with the 6 pack on that Victoria's Secret commercial".

Was very happy to see you on stage again. We were looking forward to it :) Take care.
 
So thanks to everyone who posted here. I couldn't read, let alone respond to, all your posts, but thanks for making this such a chunky robust thread. Whee!

Final thoughts:

Interviewed Far Cry 4 EP Dan Hay yesterday for my podcast. Talked about a LOT of stuff, including how he got into the gaming industry and how they create new Far Cry games. That will post this Tuesday at girlonguy.net for those of you who know how to operate computer things that make sounds.

We also talked about how hard it is to create a game, and what a massive undertaking that is, and how soul crushing it is when you've spent two years pouring your blood into something and then someone skitters up to you on the floor at E3 or online and says "your game sucks" and then bobbles away to eat a corn dog.

This made me consider the number of times I've dismissed a game glibly and out of hand with a few casual words -- like, a million times. And it made me wonder what it would be like to put two years of my life and energy and ideas and weekends into a game, and maybe destroy my marriage and my health and my friendships and my spirit to get this thing out, and then someone dumps on it summarily and can't even tell you WHY they don't like it, just that it "sucks."

So. I am going to recant my previous statement about Destiny, until I have played the game and can evaluate it fully. I poo-pooed it before it was even out, which I will admit, was a LITTLE premature. Just a tiny bit.

I will not recant my statement about Fallout: New Vegas, as I played the whole thing and I developed no more affection for it at the end than I had at the beginning. HOWEVER. I will say that that game wasn't for me, and I have elaborated in this thread as to why.

Not every game is for everyone. Don't freak out on someone just because they aren't as obsessed with Elder Scrolls as you are, or because they're struggling to understand why building a slime farm in Minecraft is a thing. Gamers are not a monolith. When I dismiss "cute" games I am not necessarily saying cute games suck.

I am just saying that they suck for ME.

I do not make this statement in the hope that the internet will become a kinder place.

I know that this is utter folly.

Have an awesome day everyone!!!
 
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