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[Leeness]

Women objectified more than men? Nah. Not a chance. It's just more socially acceptable for women to objectify men, but not vice versa. Both genders are equally guilty of it, men are just more transparent about it.

This was a post in r/funny earlier, talking about double standards on The Huffington Post:

http://i.imgur.com/mZ3PDuZ.png

That you don't see the difference between those two pictures...sweet Jesus.

 

[Snowman Prophet of Doom]

I aint particularly worried about whether the girl is displaying healthy behaviour honestly. In the grand scheme of what the thread is about I frankly don't care whether she's the happiest person ever or entirely shitty and miserable.

The main issue is she isn't harming anyone and she isn't bullying. Whether she meets any of our individual levels of morality is not really what the thread is about. But up until now she had largely been correct, online dating apps put power back in womens hands to choose and guys just gotta do better now.

Hey, no question it's "sink or swim" in online dating. As I already said, anybody who loses self-esteem because of this did not have true self-esteem to begin with, but blissful ignorance.

 

[Az987]

Now's your chance. Reply immediately with:

Why the fuck have you not replied?
I feel like I have died.

Lol im going to write her a poem titled pls respond.

Not really, I'm just waiting. I amused myself with the poem so mission accomplished.

If I ever meet her I'm going to make a lot of jokes.

 

[lightskintwin]

Then you get a bunch of dudes saying she's only with him cuz she's a gold digger or whatever.

I mean, sometimes it is. LOL You don't get something for nothing. If you're average to below average, fat, short, etc... you have to overcompensate it with something else if you want to get what you really want... for men, anyway.

 

[LookAtMeGo]

You should have planned it yourself, you're the man here. Suggest a day and place next time instead of asking her.

Congrats on the message though, seems like a good profile text.

Need to work on my assertiveness.

 

[uncelestial]

I know this is a (not very funny) comedy video, but most of the dudes here looks waaay above average IMO (better than both the women) and they swipe left on most of them.

The salient thing for me was 100% of her swipe-rights were a match, that's pretty different compared to the male's experience. Also, it kinda demonstrates how Tinder encourages you to be a shallow, judgemental asshole.

 

[Markoman]

I'm not going to say are more important, but they can certainly overcompensate for a lot including looks. Having a good sense of humor is one of the most valuable assets a man can have.

Hi 5, and this includes women. Sitting in front of your gf/bf just gazing at their beauty gets old very fast.

 

[Az987]

Need to work on my assertiveness.

Not necessarily. People just vanish on tinder. Send like "lol did I lose ya?" To her.

That's what I always do and usually I get a I'm so sorry! I'm awful at this app.

 

[Fury451]

I wrote this in 10 minutes lol

The last unicorn,
all that was left of his kind
A life lonely and sad,
until the day he did find
The piece of him that was missing
His sole purpose for existing
She was unmatched by all
But for him she did fall
It was love at first sight
Finally he felt he was right
Or maybe just whole
Did they share the same soul?
So they rode off together
No storm they could not whether
And lived happily ever after
A joyous life filled with laughter
The end!

She sent "that's great!!!!" But hasn't replied to my "haha do you really think so?" Yet.

Its probably like an "Aw so sweet" as she runs away as quickly as possible lol.

Damn. Even if it dies on the vine you can be proud of yourself for stepping up to the plate and putting yourself out there.

 

[kavanf1]

Men kill women at an incredibly higher ratio than vice versa. For that alone, asking for equal sympathy is ridiculous.

Sympathy? Killing women? What are you talking about? My point was that the way men objectify women is not that different to the way women objectify men. I don't have an issue with that, what I do have an issue with is people being dishonest about it and claiming that one gender is guilty of it and the other isn't.

That you don't see the difference between those two pictures...sweet Jesus.

I see the difference between the pictures. See above.

 

[Principate]

Women objectified more than men? Nah. Not a chance. It's just more socially acceptable for women to objectify men, but not vice versa. Both genders are equally guilty of it, men are just more transparent about it.

This was a post in r/funny earlier, talking about double standards on The Huffington Post:

Yeah how many times have a man's athletic achievements come in question for looking too mannish, name the number of successful female actors whose beauty isn't intrinsically intwined with their success and aren't ditched when too old compare with the amount of times that happens with men. Hell compare the number of times you've seen bare male chest in comparison to women in skimpy outfits on tv. But keep fucking that men are just as obejctified turkey, ignoring how comparitively recent that is in comparison to the few thousand years of the opposite.

 

[Leeness]

Sympathy? Killing women? What are you talking about? My point was that the way men objectify women is not that different to the way women objectify men. I don't have an issue with that, what I do have an issue with is people being dishonest about it and claiming that one gender is guilty of it and the other isn't.



I see the difference between the pictures. See above.

If you're referring to "the difference between them is nothing", then no, you don't.

 

[eot]

The salient thing for me was 100% of her swipe-rights were a match, that's pretty different compared to the male's experience. Also, it kinda demonstrates how Tinder encourages you to be a shallow, judgemental asshole.

A friend of a friend showed me his tinder once and it was the same, he matched with 9/10 people he swiped on. Had something like 900+ matches lol

 

[Bleepey]

A friend of a friend showed me his tinder once and it was the same, he matched with 9/10 people he swiped on. Had something like 900+ matches lol

Is he like a male model?

 

[kavanf1]

Yeah how many times have a man's athletic achievements come in question for looking too mannish, name the number of successful female actors whose beauty isn't intrinsically intwined with their success and aren't ditched when too old compare with the amount of times that happens with men. Hell compare the number of times you've seen bare male chest in comparison to women in skimpy outfits on tv. But keep fucking that men are just as obejctified turkey, ignoring how comparitively recent that is in comparison to the few thousand years of the opposite.

If you're referring to "the difference between them is nothing", then no, you don't.

I don't even know how to respond because I don't know what argument either of you are making. It doesn't seem to be anything to do with what I said.

 

[Markoman]

A friend of a friend showed me his tinder once and it was the same, he matched with 9/10 people he swiped on. Had something like 900+ matches lol

Dayum, but how is he supposed to find the chosen one amongst 900 options? I kinda feel sad for him now, lol.

 

[Principate]

I don't even know how to respond because I don't know what argument either of you are making. It doesn't seem to be anything to do with what I said.

Men's objectification of women permeates and affects much of their daily lives. Females objectification of men does almost fucking nothing. Have you lost out non beauty orientated jobs or had complaints about your looks in a work everyonement, because your not young enough or hot enough? This is shit that actually people in manners that it has no business doing so.

 

[Leeness]

I don't even know how to respond because I don't know what argument either of you are making. It doesn't seem to be anything to do with what I said.

You posted a photo and said "men and women objectify each other in the same way" with, apparently, this picture as proof of "double standards".

The fact that you can't see the difference between the two photos and the disingenous subtitles on each of the pictures is disturbing to me.

 

[heliosRAzi]

I don't even know how to respond because I don't know what argument either of you are making. It doesn't seem to be anything to do with what I said.

The difference between those two pictures is not that they're both objectifying genders, but because of the cumulative history and systemic effects of one as opposed to the other.

 

[Subpar Spatula]

I give zero shits about the swiping left. I swipe left every day of my life. It's more the "Viewing men as a monolithic block of negativity and getting schadenfreude over the idea that something is 'bringing them down'" that i would consider pretty crummy. As you said, ultimately harmless, but crummy.

No one views men as a monolith. Men in general just aren't doing well to represent themselves in dating. Want to fix that? How about no more slut shaming, ridiculous standards, entitlement, getting angry when rejected, etc.?

Until that happens why should any reasonable person take you seriously when you whine and moan a woman didn't want to date you because you're short? How about men in general extend olive branches to fix a system we broke?

 

[Count Dookkake]

Women objectified more than men? Nah. Not a chance. It's just more socially acceptable for women to objectify men, but not vice versa. Both genders are equally guilty of it, men are just more transparent about it.

This was a post in r/funny earlier, talking about double standards on The Huffington Post:

"Yeah, but what about that movie White Girls?"

 

[eot]

Is he like a male model?

He's maybe 5'11, super blond, looks like he goes to the gym but nothing extreme, but doesn't have a model face IMO. Looks pretty good in pictures though. To be honest, aside from people who have the stereotypical model face, I can never predict which guys women are going to go nuts for, so maybe he did have a really good face.

Dayum, but how is he supposed to find the chosen one amongst 900 options? I kinda feel sad for him now, lol.

He didn't take the app seriously at all

 

[Az987]

Damn. Even if it dies on the vine you can be proud of yourself for stepping up to the plate and putting yourself out there.

Haha thanks man. I appreciate it!

 

[Darryl]

my experiences have kind of been the opposite. I have pretty long hair (halfway down my chest) and outside of one of my friends, most men have complimented me but most women strangers don't seem to like long hair. though to be fair, there really hasn't been a sample size large enough of either to say if one really prefers or dislikes. I just know on sites like tinder I've had more negative reactions to having long hair than positive. chicks in general don't seem to want a guy with longer hair, minus a couple that have a thing for it. but those certainly haven't been the norm



I tend to agree with this because it's how I see women too.

problem is that shit doesn't come across in online or app dating. Never even getting an opportunity to have a real conversation means your cool life and personality means fuck all, haha. I just see it all as a filtering device.

whether or not your friends give you compliments doesn't change society, and you can go into any discussion board about long men's hair and find a barrage of people religiously saying 'cut it off'. i guarantee you that if you show your pic in any online forum and asked for anonymous opinions, 99% of men would tell you that immediately that you need to cut your hair off. they won't even do it cautiously, they'll do it like they're handing down words from the Lord himself. like they're spewing holy wisdom and it's fact. there's a reason why you feel women judge you for your hair, and i really doubt it's your hair. it's other men that have made you feel insecure over it because they're so obsessed with their appearances, it's made you critical over yourself.

 

[Markoman]

He didn't take the app seriously at all

Wait, wat? Ah, maybe this is the secret sauce...brb installing Tinder....

 

[Principate]

No one views men as a monolith. Men in general just aren't doing well to represent themselves in dating. Want to fix that? How about no more slut shaming, ridiculous standards, entitlement, getting angry when rejected, etc.?

Until that happens why should any reasonable person take you seriously when you whine and moan a woman didn't want to date you because you're short? How about men in general extend olive branches to fix a system we broke?

Ok........ and how exactly do expect men to do that? Should we round up all the male leaders?

The only way what you describe could happen as a response to men's bad rep is if men were a monolith. They are not, I have no more control over what the guy next to me than do in regards to anyone else. Which is not much.

 

[God Dayumm]

It's both

Don't ever talk about entitlement as if it only comes from one camp

 

[Morrigan Stark]

Women objectified more than men? Nah. Not a chance.

Fucking LOL

Maybe in a bizarro world where, say, this kind of poster is the norm, rather than the original:

And yes, of course, the fact that female objectification actually affects all women in their daily lives to far more significant degrees than male objectification affects men. But sure, totally the same thing.

being healthy and not being vain. it's really obvious how much appearance matters to men. men are fervant in regards to the appearance of other men. they're fucking religious. i have long hair and the conflicts that i run into with other men regarding.. hair have really driven home how vain we are. i've never met anyone who cared about my hair that wasn't a man. it's only been met with positive responses from women.

That is bizarre. My boyfriend has had long hair for close to 2 decades and no one's given him shit, other than a few co-workers and idiots making "heehee you look like Jesus" jokes (every one thinking they're funnier and cleverer than the previous one) and then moving on. Where do you live where long hair is such a pariah?

(Btw don't cut it, long hair is best hair xD)

 

[eot]

No one views men as a monolith. Men in general just aren't doing well to represent themselves in dating. Want to fix that? How about no more slut shaming, ridiculous standards, entitlement, getting angry when rejected, etc.?

Until that happens why should any reasonable person take you seriously when you whine and moan a woman didn't want to date you because you're short? How about men in general extend olive branches to fix a system we broke?

You make it sound like every guy slut shames, or goes on a hateful rant when a woman turns him down. That's like suggesting every gamer is a GGer, or judging all of mankind based on youtube commenters. Individual women upset about slut shaming has nothing to do with individual men feeling upset about being rejected for their height.

 

[lightskintwin]

Hi 5, and this includes women. Sitting in front of your gf/bf just gazing at their beauty gets old very fast.

Don't get me wrong, a woman with a great sense of humor is awesome, but at best it's a bonus; It can't overcompensate for her being fat, average to below average looking to above average to handsome/gorgeous men the same way it can for men.

 

[Subpar Spatula]

Ok........ and how exactly do expect men to do that? Should we round up all the male leaders?

The only way what you describe would happen as a response to men's bad rep is if men were a monolith. They not, I have no more control over what the guy next to me than do in regards to anyone else. Which is not much.

I don't know... maybe not get angry, shame, harass, stalk, etc women because they said no? The point is you can't expect women to care about your woes when men do much more horrendous shit. Want them to care about your height? They honestly don't have to at this point.

You make it sound like every guy slut shames, or goes on a hateful rant when a woman turns him down. That's like suggesting every gamer is a GGer, or judging all of mankind based on youtube commenters. Individual women upset about slut shaming has nothing to do with individual men feeling upset about being rejected for their height.

Of course not every guy does this but it doesn't really matter overall when you look at statistics of sexual assault, how ingrained beauty standards are for women, how scary it is to receive death threats for saying no, etc. Whining about your height is a drop in the ocean.

Don't ever talk about entitlement as if it only comes from one camp

This is very silly and shows how ignorant you are of the realities women face when dealing with men in the dating game.

By the way, women want someone shorter because men have for the longest time deemed women shorter than them to be suitable. We started the height game and it came and bit us right in the ass.

 

[Mega]

In my profile it says I like to binge watch movies while eating chinese food and candy. I had a hot girl be like "OMG I love binge watching movies with chinese food! Lets do it!"

I'm like "Sounds good to me! When and where?"

That was 5 days ago. Fuck me.

That was your mistake, making her do the planning and coming across uncertain. Should have proposed the day and place, make it easier for anyone to say yes when plans feel solid and real.

 

[Principate]

I don't know... maybe not get angry, shame, harass, stalk, etc women because they said no? The point is you can't expect women to care about your woes when men do much more horrendous shit. Want them to care about your height? They honestly don't have to at this point.

Maybe just maybe I don't do any of those things and you've just made massive assumptions about someone you barely know. But hey you don't treat men like a monolith (while treating men like a monolith).

 

[heliosRAzi]

No one views men as a monolith. Men in general just aren't doing well to represent themselves in dating. Want to fix that? How about no more slut shaming, ridiculous standards, entitlement, getting angry when rejected, etc.?

Until that happens why should any reasonable person take you seriously when you whine and moan a woman didn't want to date you because you're short? How about men in general extend olive branches to fix a system we broke?

Says no one views men as a monolith and then treats men as a monolith.

 

[eot]

Of course not every guy does this but it doesn't really matter overall when you look at statistics of sexual assault, how ingrained beauty standards are for women, how scary it is to receive death threats for saying no, etc. Whining about your height is a drop in the ocean.

When then we shouldn't fucking whine about anything because someone else has it worse right? What are you typing this on? A high tech electronics device? Fuck it, the fact that you know how to write at all means you don't get to complain.

Maybe we should draw up hierarchy of suffering so we know who gets to complain about what to whom.

 

[Mega]

I don't know... maybe not get angry, shame, harass, stalk, etc women because they said no? The point is you can't expect women to care about your woes when men do much more horrendous shit. Want them to care about your height? They honestly don't have to at this point.

Of course not every guy does this but it doesn't really matter overall when you look at statistics of sexual assault, how ingrained beauty standards are for women, how scary it is to receive death threats for saying no, etc. Whining about your height is a drop in the ocean.

Again, who are you talking to? You're not proposing solutions. You're just talking in broad sweeping generalizations about how men need to round up the men and fix men. It's useless advice.

 

[heliosRAzi]

Thus begins the 2016 Oppression Olympics.

 

[Subpar Spatula]

Maybe just maybe I don't do any of those things and you've just made massive assumptions about someone you barely know. But hey you don't treat men like a monolith (while treating men like a monolith).

That's cool you don't do this. Now we just need to wait for the environment to be less awful for women. You're part of change, that doesn't mean the past, current, and most likely future damage isn't there. Sucks to be you, but this is what happens when a system that was forcefully dominated by men starts to get blow back. Dislike it? Don't get mad, move on and understand you have it 1000% easier in life than the person that didn't want to date you because of your height.

Again, who are you talking to? You're not proposing solutions. You're just talking in broad sweeping generalizations about how men need to round up the men and fix men. It's useless advice.

Step 1: when women tell you that they deal with death threats, shaming, stalking, rape, revenge porn, etc. you probably shouldn't go "woe is me, you're equally damaging me because I'm short."

 

[ishibear]

I dunno what's going on in here

 

[Markoman]

Don't get me wrong, a woman with a great sense of humor is awesome, but at best it's a bonus; It can't overcompensate for her being fat, average to below average looking to above average to handsome/gorgeous men the same way it can for men.

Gotcha, but it's a least one bonus point, right?
And yes, this really isn't fair from the female perspective.

 

[Kurtofan]

Don't ever talk about entitlement as if it only comes from one camp

yikes

 

[Morrigan Stark]

That was your mistake, making her do the planning and coming across uncertain. Should have proposed the day and place, make it easier for anyone to say yes when plans feel solid and real.

Hmm, you'd think it'd just make it easier for the other party to say "no, that time doesn't work for me, sorry" or something like that. Guess you can't win!

Spoiler

Soooo glad I don't have to be in this stupid "dating scene", christ

 

[Principate]

That's cool you don't do this. Now we just need to wait for the environment to be less awful for women. You're part of change, that doesn't mean the past, current, and most likely future damage isn't there. Sucks to be you, but this is what happens when a system that was forcefully dominated by men starts to get blow back. Dislike it? Don't get mad, move on and understand you have it 1000% easier in life than the person that didn't want to date you because of your height.



Step 1: when women tell you that they deal with death threats, shaming, stalking, rape, revenge porn, etc. you probably shouldn't go "woe is me, you're equally damaging me because I'm short."

I'm not complaining about this "blowback" or have height issues, in fact I have no issues at getting dates through social media it's honestly a reasonably simple thing and what's happening is a natural end, I was just arguing maybe we should all show a bit more empathy to our fellow man/woman and little less generalisations of an entire freaking gender.

 

[lightskintwin]

Gotcha, but it's a least one bonus point, right?
And yes, this really isn't fair from the female perspective.

It's definitely a bonus, and it definitely isn't fair, but that's life. That just highlights the imbalance of men; women find attractive to the women; men find attractive. It works more in favor of men on average.

 

[Snowman Prophet of Doom]

The notion that men have it SO easy in life compared to women such that "You have it 1000% easier than the person saying 'no tall guys'" is ludicrous. As a group, they have it better in some respects, certainly, but there are plenty of men that are way worse off, in both tangible and intangible respects, than plenty of women, even with privilege. Watching privilege turn into an all-purpose cudgel to shut the complaints of anybody with even a whiff of it down has been a fascinating social development. Well, fascinating and sad.

 

[Subpar Spatula]

I'm not complaining about this "blowback" or have height issues, in fact I have no issues at getting dates through social media and what's happening is a natural end, I was just arguing maybe we should all show a bit more empathy to our fellow man/woman and little less generalisations of an entire freaking gender.

Men need to step up the plate and start showing that empathy in large swaths, then.

The notion that men have it SO easy in life compared to women such that "You have it 1000% easier than the person saying 'no tall guys'" is ludicrous. As a group, they have it better in some respects, certainly, but there are plenty of men that are way worse off, in both tangible and intangible respects, than plenty of women, even with privilege. Watching privilege turn into an all-purpose cudgel to shut the complaints of anybody with even a whiff of it down has been a fascinating social development. Well, fascinating and sad.

Good thing you didn't quote me because, literally, it's not hard to see who aiming at.

Do you agree women face more death threats, threats of bodily harm, shaming, rape, revenge porn, beauty standards, etc than men? If so, why shouldn't privilege be taken into account? Privilege has been giving men the opportunity to do these things free from a lot of consequences.

 

[LookAtMeGo]

That was your mistake, making her do the planning and coming across uncertain. Should have proposed the day and place, make it easier for anyone to say yes when plans feel solid and real.

Should I respond with "My place. Like right now!"

I should just stick with going to the bar.

I just like the idea of Tinder because I thought I would get the same results from the comfort of my own home.

 

[Mega]

Hmm, you'd think it'd just make it easier for the other party to say "no, that time doesn't work for me, sorry" or something like that. Guess you can't win!

Spoiler

Soooo glad I don't have to be in this stupid "dating scene", christ

It's not a dating thing. It's a psychological barrier with all socializing. People are lazy and passive. It's much harder to get a group of people to come out when the day, time and venue is completely uncertain. You clue people in that you did all the leg work, Saturday, 6pm, this great sushi restaurant and a jazz show downtown, and suddenly it feels real and people feel like they wanna be a part of it and not miss out.

 

[Not]

Hey, no question it's "sink or swim" in online dating. As I already said, anybody who loses self-esteem because of this did not have true self-esteem to begin with, but blissful ignorance.

This is probably true. They're not losing confidence, they're entering reality.

By the way, women want someone shorter because men have for the longest time deemed women shorter than them to be suitable. We started the height game and it came and bit us right in the ass.

I personally have a lot of stake in this being true lol.

It makes sense

 

[Nickle]

Subpar, does your first name happen to be "Ken"?