Princess Viola
Member
Better than me, I still haven't even palyed it.
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Transgaf: 'cause boys will be girls (and vice versa)
- Thread starter lexi
- Start date
Mr. Shankly
Neo Member
Well I consider myself genderqueer since i reject gender roles and i had other reasons but my brain is mush right now lol.
Sorry if I didn't expressed myself in the right way ... but I already meet SO MUCH types of "genderqueer" people that saying someone is "genderqueer" don't exacly say much xD
Are you closer to bigender, agender or something beyond ?
I already saw a FTM crossdresser (as in a ftm male that loved to dress as a girl) call himself genderqueer .... and I saw a person who wanted to have as much sexual characteristics as possible reaching a full level of body androginy (and read about someone who didn't wanted ANY sexual characteristics ..)
By your username I have to think that at least male pronoums are you prefered usage, right ?
Mr. Shankly
Neo Member
It's okay! Genderqueer is actually a very fluid terms since people can be genderqueer in either a political or gender...sense. Or both!
I think I am something beyond the gender spectrum. I have not quite yet figure it out but I feel like I don't fit in the categories of male or female.
I actually wish I could be androgynous and that's one of the reasons why i have so many issues with myself because i feel like my body doesn't match how I would like to be perceived.
I actually don't use male pronouns (my username is a reference to a The Smiths song lol) but i'm not entirely comfortable with female pronouns but then i feel like using the new pronouns such as hir/zer/ or whatever are awkward for me ;_; Like I said, I'm still trying to figure it out.
Dr.Palutena
Member
I know someone at my school who goes by ey/em/eir . not sure if you feel better about those than hir/zer etc.
Mr. Shankly
Neo Member
thanks for the suggestion! ;u; I'm not sure if i'd feel more comfortable with those though. gender can be pretty tricky.
Zyrusticae
Banned
You mean pronouns can be tricky!
Well, English is particularly bad for this simply because there's no such thing as a gender-neutral pronoun there. I understand it can feel weird to use a new pronoun simply because it feels 'cheap' or 'made-up' when you've pretty much never used it before... I have a hard time using something other than 'he' and 'she', myself.
Well, English is particularly bad for this simply because there's no such thing as a gender-neutral pronoun there. I understand it can feel weird to use a new pronoun simply because it feels 'cheap' or 'made-up' when you've pretty much never used it before... I have a hard time using something other than 'he' and 'she', myself.
CHEEZMO
Obsidian fan
CHEEZMO™;46531252 said:
Don't give her views =P
Here, read this
It is a good text against the burchill and explains the importance of feminists to think of transgender rights
edit : If I won 1 cent every time I see a "newsworth death" of a trans person like the one in the article she is refering being written in FULL male pronoums (SPECIALY in brazilian news) I would live flying from mansion to mansion to decide wich of my mansions are better =|
Thank you for your answers!
I hope it's okay, TransGAF, but I have a list of questions I must have answered! >.< I know it's a little much, but if anyone here could answer them in detail I'd really appreciate it. There's a bunch of very specific things about being transgender I want to know that the Internet (or Google) just doesn't seem to say anything about.
1.
Is it normal for a trans person to still feel solidarity/connection to members of their "original" gender? In the example of an MTF, could she still feel like "one of the guys" due to that being her upbringing, or even understand men better than other woman, and still be an actual trans woman? Does this happen often?
2.
Can trans people have a sexuality based on, and dependent upon, their "incorrect" genitalia? Since everyone here seems to be MTF: do any of you not only enjoy sex with the original gear, so to speak, but have a sexuality based around sex with it? Can trans people fantasize about, and desire sex in which they use the original gear more than they fantasize/desire for sex with their "target" genitals?
To put it another way, could a tran woman feel the same way about her penis (and using it) that a cisgender man feels about his?
3.
Before HRT or coming out, what does it feel like to socialze with people in the persona of the wrong gender? Do you feel awkward or uncomfortable? Do things feel "forced?" Also, does it make you feel "manly" (for MTF) or "girly" (for FTM) as a result of "playing the role", thus causing distress?
4.
Regarding denial: has anyone ever used trivial, stupid logic based on stereotypes to affirm they are cisgender; ie "I can't be a woman, I like science and history, and that's a boy thing?" Also, has belief in those stereotypes made your gender identity feel threatened? Ex "I like first person shooters, I'm not a proper woman."
In other words, comparing yourself to a cultural stereotype of your target gender, and feeling less "real" as a result.
5.
As we know, men tend to stereoptype women and women tend to stereotype men. Has anyone here ever regarded their own gender in a innocently-sexist manner as if they are their "original" gender? For example, has any trans woman ever caught herself talking about women in the same way men sometimes do; ie "I don't understand women."
6.
Have you ever been grossed/weirded out by the thought of using bathrooms of your true gender, as a result of growing up being used to using the other one? Ex: a trans man feels weird about using the men's bathroom similar to how a ciswoman might.
7.
Before coming out to yourself (this doesn't work for non-classic types), what kind of rationilizations did you use to explain or deny your feelings?
8.
For pre-transition: if you knew that you could never pass as your true gender, would you rather just put up with being in the "wrong body" rather than put up with the hassle of public harrassment/possible self-hatred?
9.
For trans gays/lesbians: Before transition, did you imagine your ideal body as one that you might otherwise find very sexy/attractive? Or this a sign of cisgender heterosexual perversion; ie autogynephyllia/autoandrophyllia.*
Also, did you feel comfortable/correct imagining yourself in a body that you would otherwise consider very unattractive/ugly?
*I'm aware that ciswoman experience autogynephyllia, so i suspect it might be a form of natural female sexuality. Has anyone here had it?
10.
Is there a difference between the way gender-specific clothing (likes dresses for trans woman) makes you feel before and after transition? Basically, before transition does looking in the mirror and seeing the image of "a man with girl clothing" or "a woman with boy clothing" make you feel MORE like you target gender, because you're wearing their clothing, or LESS like your target gender, because the clothing emphasizes just how not feminine/masculine you are/were?
I want to apologize in advance if any of these question offend anyone. That's not my intention!
I just really want to know. I hope you guys can help me understand better.Mr. Shankly
Neo Member
Can I answer some of these as someone that is trans* but not in the gender spectrum? Or do you specifically just want MTFs and FTMs to answer? I hope I don't offend any MTFs or FTMs with my answers of my own personal experience.
ALSO: not everyone here is mtf i hope you are aware of this :/ sorry for butting in guys.
If they apply to your situation, sure! I do specifically want to hear the answers of MTF/FTM, but I'm interested in non-binary people too!
Mr. Shankly
Neo Member
nah don't worry about it ^^" I dn't want to intrude
Ok ...
But I have to warn you that it is 2am and i'm VERY sleepy and people don't understand me very well even when i'm fully awake xD
*takes a deeeeeeeeeeeeep breath*
It is perfectly normal for even a cisgender tomboy to feel connected to his boy friends ... why would be diferent from a transgender tomboy ?
There are basicaly 2 types of Non-op transgender : Those who feel that the surgery is not perfect and those that are perfectly happy with their genitals.
Now about the "feels the same way with her pernis as a cisgender man feels" I guess that nobody would be able to answer that question since no person was a both at the same time. (no, bigender people don't count)
It really changes greatly from people to people, but I never had problem with socialization ... PEOPLE had problem with me not fitting the roles they think I was suposed to fit =P
That is "transphobic argument 101"
Half of the #transdocfail hashtag was based on medical professionals showing huge signs of a CLICHE crap 50's gender roles.
And of course it includes women without makeup, high hells or dresses saying that you can't be a woman without makeup, high heels or dresses.
I can understand why a person with more "outdated gender roles" to feel problematic because of that ... simply because it is no diferent than a "highly religious gay".
Ourselfs always speaks louder than any belief, I can only hope that it is not in suicide form
I have a cisgender lesbian friend who already dated a HUGE number of girls who once in a month say to whoever wants to hear "I don't understand women" =P
Only the fear of people screaming and punching me out of the bathroom because of transphobia
Being trans in my country is at best social suicide.
At worst, literal suicide (i'm the exact group that Suzanne Moore talked about)
If you have this kind of doubt you can always wait after a good time has been passed on HRT to go full time and think later.
Spoilers :
The happiness of a "hey madam" is addicting
The idea that all trans woman have autogynephyllia is one of the most transphobic documents of all trans medical care.
Do NOT take that as true.
It was made to show the doctors of the world that we are a bunch of perverted that need to be cured by psyquiatric brainwash.
That said, you have to understand that i'm the kind of "feminazi" you hear about that only depilates when REALLY necessary and don't use bras because I don't need any support.
1) Yes, everyone wants to be beautfull and NOT for thenselfs. This is NOT a sign of autognephyllia
2) Yes, we have no control over HRT since it is our genes that play mixed with all the chemical orgy that is the first puberty and the chances of not fitting the standards of feminine beauty are considerable since bone development stops at first puberty .. so no help of bone changing in "child bearing hips"
The only change is that before it was "OMFG A PIECE OF CLOTH" and now it is "meh another piece of cloth"
And i'm a jeans and shirt person ... I still don't have any dresses and I don't plan on having.
Clothing does not makes me a woman.
You REALLY need to read more on gender ... regardless of trans or cis.
Ask someone like Devo and Mumei for good books in english about it because you have really jurassic views on gender
ArchedThunder
Banned
The fact that you used jurassic to describe that person's view on gender made my day. No idea why but it just made me giggle.
ArchedThunder
Banned
My day has been double made. Now the Jurassic Park theme will be stuck in my head all day.
You owe me a clean monitor ....
ArchedThunder
Banned
So I'm not even original?
I'm gonna go stomp on stuff now
Actualy Jurassic Park started with it ... but now till the opening of Jurassic Park 4, you are the true master of trans dinossaurs for a "there should be only one" kinda of thing since the tumblr don't exist anymore
ArchedThunder
Banned
Highlander transosaurs.
Are you seriously calling *my* views on gender "jurassic?" I'd really like to know specifically where you got that idea; I think you really misunderstood where I was coming from with a lot of those questions.
I really don't appreciate you guys making fun of me for being some "goofy ignorant cis 'ally'" either. You don't know me, so please don't make assumptions. I thought this was a thread where people could go for support, not be judged.
If anyone else would want to answer my questions, I would genuinely appreciate it. I did put real thought into them, as silly as they might seem to you.
I really don't appreciate you guys making fun of me for being some "goofy ignorant cis 'ally'" either. You don't know me, so please don't make assumptions. I thought this was a thread where people could go for support, not be judged.
If anyone else would want to answer my questions, I would genuinely appreciate it. I did put real thought into them, as silly as they might seem to you.
ArchedThunder
Banned
I think you got the wrong idea, we weren't making fun of you.
Sorry if I sounded like making fun of you but I REALLY answered those question truthfully.
Those dinossaur things have NOTHING to do with you.
They are really the only examples I found on the internet of the dead tumblr
Your question sounded like your view on genders are jurassic because ALL of then were "making something boy related makes you less of a girl" kind of questions.
Here :
1- having lots of boy friends makes you less of a girl ?
2- having sex with your dick makes you less of a girl ?
3- acting more like a boy makes you less of a girl ?
4- You like science and history, does it makes you less of a girl ?
5- Thinking "I don't understand women" makes you less of a girl ?
6- Being grossed by using a bathroom full of bloody tampons makes you less of a girl ?
7- What did your own prejudices makes you less of a girl when you were pre-everything ?
8- Your body can makes you less of a girl ?
9- Imagining a hot body makes you less of a lesbian girl ?
10- Having a "male body" wearing girl clothing makes you less of a girl ?
And those show completly outdated views on gender because they ALL fall into a crap jurassic binary gender stereotype ... wich is completly absurd considering how cis girls can do insanely boysh things and still be ... cis girls.
Why with a trans girl would be diferent ?
The only thing that makes you less of a girl is having a male gender
Please change boy and girl with the apropriate usage for your identification
Don't be a brachiosaurus. When hit with a laundry list of problematic language you can't blame someone for checking out and passing the (educational) buck. Read a few more blogs and books about gender. Take in some more. We all produce our worldview from our own stereotypes and biases. Expand your stereotype about Jurassic dinosaurs and minimize your bias about dried up old lizards. Dinosaurs are awesome!
I don't believe in any gender roles/stereotypes or anything. I'm sorry if I gave that impression; I believe I worded my questions very poorly. ^^; Platy, I wasn't implying that certain traits make one less of their own gender- I was describing irrational feelings and emotions to see if trans people had experience with them; I wasn't describing my own view of reality.
I've re-done my questions (except 5-6) to make more sense. Do these work better?
1.) Can people identify with, relate to, and prefer the company of the opposite gender to their own gender?
More specifically, can one feel more comfortable "grouping" themselves with the opposite gender than their own gender? (Ex, "I'm a male, but one of the girls.")
2.) Can a trans person not only be okay with, but prefer their original genitals to that of their true gender?
Put it this way: cismen make a huge deal out of how devastated they would be if their junk was destroyed. Do any trans women feel the same way? Can a trans women feel more "correct" with the genitalia she was born with as opposed to that typically held by other women?
3.) Pre-transition and coming out, does presenting as and being perceived as the wrong gender cause distress? Does it feel "weird" to talk to people and hear the wrong-gendered voice, and feel uncomfortable knowing how they perceive you; not as your true self?
4.) Have you ever FELT insecure about your gender because you didn't fit a cultural rule about it? (Ex. "Men like FPS.") You didn't believe in this rule and knew it was stupid, but you FELT the irrational emotion anyway as a result of cultural conditioning.
7.) If/when you were ever in denial, what "logic" did you use to deny that you were transgender? I'm not talking justification, but your thought process for not admitting it to yourself (Ex. "i know I can't be trans, because...")
8.) Before transition, IF you had/did know, 100%, that you would never visually pass as your true gender, do you still think it would be worth it?
9.) For trans gays/lesbians: Picture your ideal/desired body you imagine(d) yourself in before transitioning. If someone else in the real world had that body, would you find them sexy/attractive?
If not, was/is that "ideal" body one you would consider very unnattractive on another person?
(I'm NOT implying the existence of auto gyne/androphyllia, I just want to know if this a natural thought process for real trans gays/lesbians. I'm NOT implying self-sexualization either, I just want to know if people naturally conceive their mental personas as attractive by default.)
10.) Before transitioning, how did wearing gender-specific clothing of your true gender feel?
Specifically, did wearing clothing make you PHYSICALLY FEEL
*LESS femineine/masculine physically, because the clothing emphasized how incorrect your body was
or
*MORE feminine/masculine physically, because the clothing countered how incorrect your body was.
(I'm not talking about your mental perception of yourself, but what you see when you look in the mirror and how you feel about it.)
Sorry to keep bombarding you guys with this, but I reallly just want the perspectives of actual trans people in response to my specific inquiries; I'm tired of playing "Google Roulette" so to speak.
I've re-done my questions (except 5-6) to make more sense. Do these work better?
1.) Can people identify with, relate to, and prefer the company of the opposite gender to their own gender?
More specifically, can one feel more comfortable "grouping" themselves with the opposite gender than their own gender? (Ex, "I'm a male, but one of the girls.")
2.) Can a trans person not only be okay with, but prefer their original genitals to that of their true gender?
Put it this way: cismen make a huge deal out of how devastated they would be if their junk was destroyed. Do any trans women feel the same way? Can a trans women feel more "correct" with the genitalia she was born with as opposed to that typically held by other women?
3.) Pre-transition and coming out, does presenting as and being perceived as the wrong gender cause distress? Does it feel "weird" to talk to people and hear the wrong-gendered voice, and feel uncomfortable knowing how they perceive you; not as your true self?
4.) Have you ever FELT insecure about your gender because you didn't fit a cultural rule about it? (Ex. "Men like FPS.") You didn't believe in this rule and knew it was stupid, but you FELT the irrational emotion anyway as a result of cultural conditioning.
7.) If/when you were ever in denial, what "logic" did you use to deny that you were transgender? I'm not talking justification, but your thought process for not admitting it to yourself (Ex. "i know I can't be trans, because...")
8.) Before transition, IF you had/did know, 100%, that you would never visually pass as your true gender, do you still think it would be worth it?
9.) For trans gays/lesbians: Picture your ideal/desired body you imagine(d) yourself in before transitioning. If someone else in the real world had that body, would you find them sexy/attractive?
If not, was/is that "ideal" body one you would consider very unnattractive on another person?
(I'm NOT implying the existence of auto gyne/androphyllia, I just want to know if this a natural thought process for real trans gays/lesbians. I'm NOT implying self-sexualization either, I just want to know if people naturally conceive their mental personas as attractive by default.)
10.) Before transitioning, how did wearing gender-specific clothing of your true gender feel?
Specifically, did wearing clothing make you PHYSICALLY FEEL
*LESS femineine/masculine physically, because the clothing emphasized how incorrect your body was
or
*MORE feminine/masculine physically, because the clothing countered how incorrect your body was.
(I'm not talking about your mental perception of yourself, but what you see when you look in the mirror and how you feel about it.)
Sorry to keep bombarding you guys with this, but I reallly just want the perspectives of actual trans people in response to my specific inquiries; I'm tired of playing "Google Roulette" so to speak.
Ok... lets try again.
Pro-tip : if you want a PERSON'S OPINION don't start with "can people" because it sounds like you are asking "is it possible for a person to" and not "do you"
A person CAN do lots of things that I would not do =P
More specifically, can one feel more comfortable "grouping" themselves with the opposite gender than their own gender? (Ex, "I'm a male, but one of the girls.")[/QUOTE]
Yes, people usualy identify and related to what they like, not what gender they are.
If it is a trait more common to the oposite sex, why not ?
While I do have lots of girl friends who likes gaming, probably the small majority are men
Not my case, but yes, you can find non-op people who prefer their original genitals (I find it more common on ftm since the surgery sux and ... who would deny multiple orgasms ? =P)
I think any human being would be devastated if ANY part of their body was devastated (unless those with alien body syndrome of something like that) no matter how much they hate it.
But no, I doubt any transwomen would feel their feminity in problem if her penis don't work or anything like that (most anti androgens kills erection)
I never presented how society expect a men to present, I always presented as myself.
I'm not the most girly of the girls, so MOST of the time I didn't had any problem
Me ? No
But it is common to think if you live in a place with more traditional roles
While I do know it is an insanely common idea, I personaly never had this problem.
What I had was "ok .. i'm trans, what do I do about it" wich as I explained too some time since the way my country treats transgender people is INSANELY far from the ideal
Yes, being yourself is always more happy than not being.
Also, people take "passing" as if it was only if you suddenly transform into Angelina Jolie.
There are ugly cis women and there are beautiful cis women with male features
Passing is not that hard as the internet make out to be =P
I doubt anyone on the planet would have their ideal body an ugly body.
People can have ideal bodys that are seen by society as ugly bodys, but that are beautiful for thenselfs ... I mean .. that is the basic idea of ideal xD
The only thing would not happen is a "femme gay man" who is atracted to "bear gay man" or things like that
A mix of both.
"Omfg It feels so RIGHT ! .... but it would be better if I choose something that don't draw that much attention to the shoulder"
ArchedThunder
Banned
Not really my place to ask, but is something wrong?
Nothing major besides dysphoria but I've been in a depression for the past week.
ArchedThunder
Banned
Sorry to hear. I asked because for some reason I like asking people to tell me about their problems.
Dr.Palutena
Member
1.
Is it normal for a trans person to still feel solidarity/connection to members of their "original" gender? In the example of an MTF, could she still feel like "one of the guys" due to that being her upbringing, or even understand men better than other woman, and still be an actual trans woman? Does this happen often?
I have no idea if it happens often or not. I know personally I feel no special affiliation between myself and males
2.
Can trans people have a sexuality based on, and dependent upon, their "incorrect" genitalia? Since everyone here seems to be MTF: do any of you not only enjoy sex with the original gear, so to speak, but have a sexuality based around sex with it? Can trans people fantasize about, and desire sex in which they use the original gear more than they fantasize/desire for sex with their "target" genitals?
To put it another way, could a tran woman feel the same way about her penis (and using it) that a cisgender man feels about his?
I'm not sure once again, personally I have no such fantasies or desires, I know for others they have no qualms with keeping their equipment the way it is
3.
Before HRT or coming out, what does it feel like to socialze with people in the persona of the wrong gender? Do you feel awkward or uncomfortable? Do things feel "forced?" Also, does it make you feel "manly" (for MTF) or "girly" (for FTM) as a result of "playing the role", thus causing distress?
I'll say I've never felt manly, I more or less got through my years of repression and denial by being an emotionless, indifferent person, than trying to be exceedingly manly or forcing a masculine role.At most I did willfully accept some homophobic tendencies, aversion to femininity that were expected of my assigned birth gender
4.
Regarding denial: has anyone ever used trivial, stupid logic based on stereotypes to affirm they are cisgender; ie "I can't be a woman, I like science and history, and that's a boy thing?" Also, has belief in those stereotypes made your gender identity feel threatened? Ex "I like first person shooters, I'm not a proper woman."
In other words, comparing yourself to a cultural stereotype of your target gender, and feeling less "real" as a result.
I know too many ciswomen who dont ascribe to stereotypical things and even like "boy things" to have it threaten my gender identity. If anything sometimes I do feel like I shouldn't like so much stereotypical female things as that's what I feel is expected of me as a trans woman, but then i think that's equally silly for me to feel than liking "boy things".
5.
As we know, men tend to stereoptype women and women tend to stereotype men. Has anyone here ever regarded their own gender in a innocently-sexist manner as if they are their "original" gender? For example, has any trans woman ever caught herself talking about women in the same way men sometimes do; ie "I don't understand women."
While, I identify as a woman, I have yet to been socialized as one outside of very limited interactions, thus a good bit of feminine norms are a mystery to me, even then I can't say i understand either gender, and every person is an individual with varying experiences and influences that make them harder or easier to understand than others regardless of gender.
6.
Have you ever been grossed/weirded out by the thought of using bathrooms of your true gender, as a result of growing up being used to using the other one? Ex: a trans man feels weird about using the men's bathroom similar to how a ciswoman might.
Eh, not really. I dont think of public bathrooms as places that are entirely clean to begin with.
7.
Before coming out to yourself (this doesn't work for non-classic types), what kind of rationilizations did you use to explain or deny your feelings?
I ascribed it as a sexual fetish, as something I couldnt actually do anything about, As something I didnt really want, etc,
8.
For pre-transition: if you knew that you could never pass as your true gender, would you rather just put up with being in the "wrong body" rather than put up with the hassle of public harrassment/possible self-hatred?
I dont think it's possible to not "pass" to some degree, but ignoring that, I've already accepted that I will never 100% look the way I want to look, but hey that's true of even many many cis women . Also for me, there are many aspects of my body outside of general appearance to the outside world that I would still want to change.
9.
For trans gays/lesbians: Before transition, did you imagine your ideal body as one that you might otherwise find very sexy/attractive? Or this a sign of cisgender heterosexual perversion; ie autogynephyllia/autoandrophyllia.*
Also, did you feel comfortable/correct imagining yourself in a body that you would otherwise consider very unattractive/ugly?
*I'm aware that ciswoman experience autogynephyllia, so i suspect it might be a form of natural female sexuality. Has anyone here had it?
I'd say the image I have in my head, while attractive/sexy to me, it is still very different than my ideal body and appearance for a potential partner.
10.
Is there a difference between the way gender-specific clothing (likes dresses for trans woman) makes you feel before and after transition? Basically, before transition does looking in the mirror and seeing the image of "a man with girl clothing" or "a woman with boy clothing" make you feel MORE like you target gender, because you're wearing their clothing, or LESS like your target gender, because the clothing emphasizes just how not feminine/masculine you are/were?
I want to apologize in advance if any of these question offend anyone. That's not my intention!
To be fair I couldnt answer all of it or entirely in the way you want since I'm out to myself and a good few people, but I'm neither fully out or in a place in my life where i could start transitioning.
I've had this bookmarked for so long, but I've barely started with it =/
The good news is, I do feel like my female voice is both improving and becoming second nature. My biggest problem is work - I'm a manager in the food industry, and well, I'm not really the management type(for those familiar with MBTI, I'm INFP) which means that I had to develop a "manager persona" in order to deal with work. When I go into manager mode, my voice immediately drops.
So at work, my voice is constantly fluctuating between female conversational(for the most part, I'm not out at work, but I need all the practice I can get), phone voice(which is most often gendered female), and male manager voice. Pretty frustrating, and I've already talked to my boss about plans to transition on the job in May, so I feel that voice work is one of those things I REALLY need to buckle down on.
CHEEZMO
Obsidian fan
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2013/jan/18/julie-burchill-and-the-observer
My day just got very slightly less shit.
My day just got very slightly less shit.
I've just taken the approach of not giving a fuck anymore. Some people have noticed and suspected things, and many more have not. Everyone has their own shit to deal with and aren't necessarily paying as much attention to us as we like to think. Work is a good opportunity for me to work on voice(both with strangers and conversationally with people I know) so I take it.
In other news, slowly getting gendered correctly more by strangers, even all guy'd up! Most people still misgender me, but the lady at the gas station ma'am'd me the other day while I was waiting in line at the counter, even though I had a day's worth of growth on my face from a long day at work. Two women and a man have ma'am'd me at work recently.
One of my coworkers came up to me and two others(one guy, one girl) and addressed us as "gentleman and ladies". It could have been a simple slip of the tongue or someone may have outed me to him, but he glanced at me afterwards and was having trouble stammering out a correction/apology. All I could do was grin XD
I've want to be presenting female part time by May, mostly so I'm more comfortable at the end of the month presenting as female at A-Kon in Dallas(big deal to me, since I'll get to see several friends that I don't get to see very often). I currently have zero girl clothes that fit, and want to lose some weight before I start shopping(only been on HRT for six months, so I'm still lumpy in some of the wrong places > >). As I stated earlier, I'm going to continue to work on my voice and I need to figure out the riddle that is my hair. From the brow down, my face is rather delicate, and well, feminine. I have a great complexion, too.
What is going to hold me back is my forehead and hairline. I've met one cis woman ever with a hairline combo as bad as mine - and a huge forehead isn't doing me any favors, either. I can mask these problems somewhat with bangs and some creative styling, but I'm afraid that my hairline is just too dramatic. I look like I'm balding, even though I never started - it's just a result of bad genetics. I look at other things holding back my "passability" and see them being sorted out with effort or more time on HRT, but I see my hairline and just don't know how I'll ever not get clocked with it.
The good news is that my hairline *is* advancing - and has been since practically day one of HRT. The bad news is that it has so far to go that I can't see that being enough on its own. I think I would feel uncomfortable in a wig(although I am starting to reconsider...), I can't ALWAYS have my hair under a hat or otherwise covered, and getting my hairline surgically lowered is not really a fiscally viable option at this point(especially as I continue to work on LHR/electro and still need to save for SRS). I want to ask a stylist for advice, but don't really know where to start finding the right one.
Dr.Palutena
Member
I really have to save for electrolysis, finding the time to work on my voice is always a problem . Think I have some time in the mornings .
ArchedThunder
Banned
Have you tried different razors and/or cream?
For me it's just neurosis. I hate talking to nobody, I hate hearing my own voice. Always feels awkward.
And I'm planning to do vocals for my own albums, what's wrong with me
ArchedThunder
Banned
Sorry to hear that, I'm sure you sound fine. =)
Dr.Palutena
Member
Yea there is that, i'd prefer people to actually hold a conversation with, but I'm not sure just yet how much time in the night i have for that, and all my friends probably wont be available in the morning.
Brian Griffin
Member
Do you play League of Legends by chance? I'd watch the hell outa some LoL streaming.