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[Android18a]

Even though I have no idea how Work would react, and my Dad might disown me immediately, part of me wants to go on Facebook right now and just tell everyone about my situation and just get it over with... I'm just scared :3 What to do...

 

[Simply Sarah]

Even though I have no idea how Work would react, and my Dad might disown me immediately, part of me wants to go on Facebook right now and just tell everyone about my situation and just get it over with... I'm just scared :3 What to do...

Does your dad already know or would this be how he found out? I apologize if you've said before, I'm really really bad at remembering these things/taking 5 minutes to search a thread *coughs*. x_X

Since the former is super messy and depends a lot on specifics, for the purposes of this post I'll assume the latter since it's less complicated and applies to most people in such a situation. Generally, I would suggest trying to build up a core of supportive people before telling the broader world, although obviously that's always a bit risky since reactions can be hard to predict. I'd also suggest telling immediate and close family personally rather than through some public declaration unless there's a really specific reason otherwise.

 

[Android18a]

My family have 'caught' me a number of times back when I lived at home. The reason I moved out was because they found my 'stash' of girl clothes and I essentially had to "man up" or leave. My Dad and Grandad are conservative christians.

The rest of my family I feel more confident about. The other side of it is work, but I feel like I'd want to have had at least a gender appointment at the clinic before I take that step.

 

[Simply Sarah]

My family have 'caught' me a number of times back when I lived at home. The reason I moved out was because they found my 'stash' of girl clothes and I essentially had to "man up" or leave. My Dad and Grandad are conservative christians.

The rest of my family I feel more confident about. The other side of it is work, but I feel like I'd want to have had at least a gender appointment at the clinic before I take that step.

Ah ha. You may want to talk with parts of your family that you think would be most supportive (with the backup understanding that they may still go and out you to everyone else >.<). And yes, I'd suggest having some support and such before going to work. Hopefully you can find somewhere that will help in telling them/getting them information, since most businesses, even if totally supportive, have no idea how the heck to "properly" respond and what to do to make things go smoothly.

 

[Alchemy]

My family have 'caught' me a number of times back when I lived at home. The reason I moved out was because they found my 'stash' of girl clothes and I essentially had to "man up" or leave. My Dad and Grandad are conservative christians.

The rest of my family I feel more confident about. The other side of it is work, but I feel like I'd want to have had at least a gender appointment at the clinic before I take that step.

Does it matter if they accept you or not? And if it is, how much effort do you think it will take to bring them around to accepting you? Even if you know how your family will react you're still going to be stuck dealing with that reaction in some form.

Then again, if my parents were going to force me to leave home because of finding girls clothing I probably wouldn't put any effort into maintaining that relationship. My parents react negatively to any LGBT stuff, so I just don't maintain a relationship with them at all.

 

[HolyBaikal]

Sometimes I feel like identifying as transgender people would give transgender people a bad name. And that I shouldn't tell people I'm trans so much. Even though it feels good to confide my feelings in people.

I'm sorry if I make transgender people look bad. Or something like that. I know that a lot of people on NeoGAF call me a "troll" or are surprised by what I say. Apparently, some of the things I feel... are unpopular on NeoGAF. Like.. maybe my radical feminist views on kink and visual novels. Or.. on transhumanism and Singularitarianism. Or my opinions about anime and cuteness.

I'm not sure what all I say that.. some people don't like. But... those seem like some of the things.

But.. I'm sorry if I've made anyone here feel uncomfortable.

 

[JonathanNemo]

But.. I'm sorry if I've made anyone here feel uncomfortable.

Absolutely not! You're wonderful. Don't let cranky close-minded people get you down.

I think... and this is personal belief system entering here, when it comes to dealing with the broader world, there's a balance between artificially supporting the status quo, and pushing more revolutionary ideas. The former comes with financial support and easy short term rewards, the latter with better long term benefits for everybody, including yourself, but also more hardships in the short term for yourself.

I don't think NeoGAF at large is that accepting of the more revolutionary ideas. And that's just kind of a byproduct of its composition, though there's smaller subgroups to identify and confide with.

Though I haven't come out with any specifics here yet, and I'm still very new to this community... far as I'm concerned, you're welcome here anytime.

 

[sploatee]

Some good news - Stonewall are finally going to start fighting for trans equality in the UK. I'm so happy about this! It looks like there's going to be a "some people are trans - get over it" campaign of some sort too. Really happy to see this

Just a bit of good news.


I just realised I repeated myself twice. :|

 

[Beth Cyra]

Sometimes I feel like identifying as transgender people would give transgender people a bad name. And that I shouldn't tell people I'm trans so much. Even though it feels good to confide my feelings in people.

I'm sorry if I make transgender people look bad. Or something like that. I know that a lot of people on NeoGAF call me a "troll" or are surprised by what I say. Apparently, some of the things I feel... are unpopular on NeoGAF. Like.. maybe my radical feminist views on kink and visual novels. Or.. on transhumanism and Singularitarianism. Or my opinions about anime and cuteness.

I'm not sure what all I say that.. some people don't like. But... those seem like some of the things.

But.. I'm sorry if I've made anyone here feel uncomfortable.

Nah, your a treasure just like all others who go through this.

Though I do believe you and I clash on SEVERAL views, it makes me think no less of you or be any less proud to know your Transgender like myself.

 

[HolyBaikal]

I'm so glad. I was worried.

Thank you all so much. I feel much better, now.

 

[JonathanEx]

Some good news - Stonewall are finally going to start fighting for trans equality in the UK. I'm so happy about this! It looks like there's going to be a "some people are trans - get over it" campaign of some sort too. Really happy to see this

Just a bit of good news.


I just realised I repeated myself twice. :|

Really good news. Have you flicked through the report they put out with the news? Their attitude with their past mistakes and how they'll work on it and get to where they want to be, it's a really well thought through position. Fantastic as you say for trans equality over here.

 

[Simply Sarah]

Really good news. Have you flicked through the report they put out with the news? Their attitude with their past mistakes and how they'll work on it and get to where they want to be, it's a really well thought through position. Fantastic as you say for trans equality over here.

Given their history, I'll wait until I see a lot of actual concrete action before I'm willing to believe things have actually changed. Put me down as very cautiously optimistic.

 

[sploatee]

Really good news. Have you flicked through the report they put out with the news? Their attitude with their past mistakes and how they'll work on it and get to where they want to be, it's a really well thought through position. Fantastic as you say for trans equality over here.

I've not, yet. I've been to a few Stonewall events with work and it's always been the elephant in the room. So I'm just delighted that this stupidity is now behind them.

Given their history, I'll wait until I see a lot of actual concrete action before I'm willing to believe things have actually changed. Put me down as very cautiously optimistic.

Fingers crossed.

 

[Alchemy]

So my wife is visiting her family next weekend... and she is probably going to tell her family I'm transitioning (with my blessing). This week should be fun.

 

[Hollycat]

My Psychiatrist has given me instructions to start wearing a bra openly whenever I leave the house including going to work. So far I've been hiding my breasts with multiple layers of clothing and a wrap.

Hopefully this ends well.

 

[Butterfly Witch]

Just as a reminder to everyone, we do have an IRC channel where we can talk about things more openly and in real time.

Feel free to ask for the information or just PM if you want to know more.

 

[Anastasia]

Just as a reminder to everyone, we do have an IRC channel where we can talk about things more openly and in real time.

Feel free to ask for the information or just PM if you want to know more.

There's more than one channel; one public and one private. If people want information for the public channel then you can PM me.

Edit: On second thought I'll quote the information for it:

Just reminding people again that a new public IRC chat room exists.

server: studio64.yi.org
channel: #transplaza

Here's a handy webchat link for people who want to take a look: http://bit.ly/1nEMtpD

(There's also a private chat as well, and you can ask for the password to that in there.)

 

[Reishiki]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

 

[Simply Sarah]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

Congratulations!

 

[Butterfly Witch]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

Congratulations Rei!

 

[Alchemy]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

Woo congrats!

 

[Dai101]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

 

[Sibylus]

Congratulations, Rei

 

[Beth Cyra]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

Congratz, that is so awesome..

 

[JonathanNemo]

Picked up my Evorel patches today and slapped one on about 5 minutes ago.

That's me officially started HRT

Magnificent! Best wishes ahead.

 

[Android18a]

Congrats Reishiki You're on the road!

So jelly.

 

[Reishiki]

Congratulations!

Congratulations Rei!

Woo congrats!

Congratulations, Rei

Congratz, that is so awesome..

Magnificent! Best wishes ahead.

Congrats Reishiki You're on the road!

So jelly.

So much love, thanks for the support

I return to work tonight at midnight. Kinda nervous, but there's no going back now!

 

[lexi]

yeesh and I thought Off-Topic was bad. It's Castro District compared to Gaming!

 

[Amalthea]

Eh, I was never content with "gaming-culture" but since they try to tackle social issues it has gotten really insufferable. Especially how it basically proves a lot of the bad stereotypes about gamers.

"It's about ethics in games journalism. Too much ethics!"

 

[The Technomancer]

yeesh and I thought Off-Topic was bad. It's Castro District compared to Gaming!

Sorry about that. It started out okay-ish but it seemingly went to hell overnight. Either way though the real point of the thread was just to draw attention to the Escapist's decision, so hopefully people who would want to stay away knew about it

Hi by the way. I don't poke my head in here often even to lurk, and trans issues are something I still feel inadequately ignorant about, but seeing stuff like that does genuinely anger me

 

[lexi]

Sorry about that. It started out okay-ish but it seemingly went to hell overnight. Either way though the real point of the thread was just to draw attention to the Escapist's decision, so hopefully people who would want to stay away knew about it

Hi by the way. I don't poke my head in here often even to lurk, and trans issues are something I still feel inadequately ignorant about, but seeing stuff like that does genuinely anger me

No need to apologise, your input is greatly appreciated; if only your self-professed 'inadequate ignorance' was shared by more people.

 

[Amalthea]

TBH I don't really wan't to post in such threads anymore. Outside of stating medical facts with sources I never say the right things wich just gives the other side points.

 

[Lady Gaia]

It never really occurred to me that there was a TransGAF thread until last night's descent into madness over The Escapist's hire, so at least some good comes of these things. Actually, I've been pleasantly surprised by both the broad support and moderator awareness of transgender issues on the forum.

Hi! I'm yet another transgender woman on GAF. I've been living the life I was meant to lead full-time for a little over five years now with the support of my wonderful wife and the overwhelming majority of friends and family. My father is a notable exception but perhaps he'll come around in time. I don't tend to wear my transness on my sleeve but I'm not stealth or anything, because it feels unnecessary. I'm accepted by everyone I interact with on a regular basis, and that's enough to let me relax and get on with life. No longer wanting a secret to hide was one of the reasons I transitioned in the first place.

 

[JonathanNemo]

TBH I don't really wan't to post in such threads anymore. Outside of stating medical facts with sources I never say the right things wich just gives the other side points.

You did fine, you were braver than me. I still feel really drained after the last thread disaster.

Hi! I'm yet another transgender woman on GAF. I've been living the life I was meant to lead full-time for a little over five years now with the support of my wonderful wife and the overwhelming majority of friends and family. My father is a notable exception but perhaps he'll come around in time. I don't tend to wear my transness on my sleeve but I'm not stealth or anything, because it feels unnecessary. I'm accepted by everyone I interact with on a regular basis, and that's enough to let me relax and get on with life. No longer wanting a secret to hide was one of the reasons I transitioned in the first place.

Welcome! I'm quite new myself, also not yet ready to fully disclose where I stand here, but it's always nice to have another person stand by us.

 

[Platy]

The lack of transmen on this thread always makes me think about how being a "hardcore gamer" is something totaly teachable, since "little boys" are easier to receive videogames as gifts.

 

[Amalthea]

I think gaming as a hobby looks pretty outlandish from an outsiders perspective if you weren't acclimated early enough.

 

[Beth Cyra]

It never really occurred to me that there was a TransGAF thread until last night's descent into madness over The Escapist's hire, so at least some good comes of these things. Actually, I've been pleasantly surprised by both the broad support and moderator awareness of transgender issues on the forum.

Hi! I'm yet another transgender woman on GAF. I've been living the life I was meant to lead full-time for a little over five years now with the support of my wonderful wife and the overwhelming majority of friends and family. My father is a notable exception but perhaps he'll come around in time. I don't tend to wear my transness on my sleeve but I'm not stealth or anything, because it feels unnecessary. I'm accepted by everyone I interact with on a regular basis, and that's enough to let me relax and get on with life. No longer wanting a secret to hide was one of the reasons I transitioned in the first place.

Welcome welcome!

I do tend to wear it on myself, but then again I think that is just because of my brash nature and the fact that the majority my best TransBro is very open about it and he is really just awesome so I kinda gathered that trait as well.

Granted I try not to bring it up with out need, as but I also don't hide it and my features are sadly very masculine so its rather hard to hide LOL.

I think gaming as a hobby looks pretty outlandish from an outsiders perspective if you weren't acclimated early enough.

I agree with this. Also We gamers can come across as way to Aggressive or Cultish. I won't lie, every time I see games to "convince" spouse/gf/bf/so that gaming is awesome makes me queasy.

There are so many hobbies and things to do, that there is nothing wrong with not gaming and unless your SO is showing at least some hints that they are interested a lot of times it feels like people are trying to force a shared love when in reality it's likely they just have different taste then their SO and there is nothing wrong with that.

 

[WaffleTaco]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?" I am debating on whether or not to DiY hormones, because banking sperm is a costly issue, and the only reason I haven't.

 

[Platy]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?" I am debating on whether or not to DiY hormones, because banking sperm is a costly issue, and the only reason I haven't.

I considered for a VERY brief time. THan I saw the prices and remembered that I live in a "third world country" where there are thousands of kids to adopt =P

 

[Box of Bunnies]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?"

I didn't even consider it. The thought of being a kid's biological father squicks me out, and I'm fairly straight-leaning so I never really foresaw a situation where it would be much use to me anyway.

 

[Alchemy]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?" I am debating on whether or not to DiY hormones, because banking sperm is a costly issue, and the only reason I haven't.

Nope, don't like kids. Kitties and puppies are all I want

 

[JonathanNemo]

Nope, don't like kids. Kitties and puppies are all I want

Generally I agree, but there are a few people out there whom I'd really like to raise kids with. I'd do it for them, and anybody else I might meet in the future who would be interested.

On the other hand, there are more kids being born than there are people who can take care of them. The adoption option seems more compelling for a number of reasons, not the least of which being giving birth doing terrible things to a person's body.

 

[Beth Cyra]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?" I am debating on whether or not to DiY hormones, because banking sperm is a costly issue, and the only reason I haven't.

Nope. I already have three kids and we don't need any more. My wife and I always wanted to be mothers, and we are and that is more then good for us.

 

[Platy]

Yeah after a while I started hating kids so better I guess xD

 

[Simply Sarah]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?" I am debating on whether or not to DiY hormones, because banking sperm is a costly issue, and the only reason I haven't.

I did, but I'm not sure if I'll ever make use of that fact.

 

[lexi]

Happy 5 year anniversary!

Wood themed gifts can be left by the door.

 

[Lady Gaia]

I didn't even seriously consider banking sperm. The way I see it, the world needs more love for children more than it needs more children. We're happy as a childless couple devoting time and resources to children in other ways. We give time and financial support to youth shelters and other charities as well as spoiling our beloved nephew.

 

[Butterfly Witch]

All right y'alls, question time, and not sure if this has been asked before, but I figured it could bring up some conversation: "Did you bank sperm before going on HRT?" I am debating on whether or not to DiY hormones, because banking sperm is a costly issue, and the only reason I haven't.

Hey WaffleTaco, I know you wanted to join the IRC channel some time ago (months?) and now I can give you that information if you're still interested. Sorry it took so long.


Banking sperm is costly, very costly and you still have to find a partner who is able to conceive and is willing. Also, banked sperm does not remain viable all that long so keep that in mind.

Personally I had no reason to so it was never a decision that I had to make, there would be no point in doing it and it would cost me a mint just to kick that can a few years down the line. If I ever feel the urge to be a legal mommy (haha) then I can always adopt.

 

[iirate]

Happy 5 year anniversary!

Wood themed gifts can be left by the door.

Thank you for the thread. ^_^

I can't believe that I've been here so long - my introductory post was 4.5 years ago, and I was lurking before that(and since, I hardly ever post).

 

[WaffleTaco]

Hey WaffleTaco, I know you wanted to join the IRC channel some time ago (months?) and now I can give you that information if you're still interested. Sorry it took so long.


Banking sperm is costly, very costly and you still have to find a partner who is able to conceive and is willing. Also, banked sperm does not remain viable all that long so keep that in mind.

Personally I had no reason to so it was never a decision that I had to make, there would be no point in doing it and it would cost me a mint just to kick that can a few years down the line. If I ever feel the urge to be a legal mommy (haha) then I can always adopt.

I think I found the IRC channel a few months ago, but was too nervous to actually say anything, mainly because it seemed like no one was taking. I'm not entirely sure though.


And thanks for all the replies TransGaf. I really do seem to be in the minority on this one, on here as well as Reddit. I also thought banked sperm could last years? I have some money saved, around 2 grand, but I don't know if I should waste it and try bank sperm, when I could be, saving for my future apartment, hormones and maybe therapy.