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[Beth Cyra]

For me, that's honestly the worst part.

I mean all of human history has been an agonizing, miserable shitshow for trans people, yet we had to be born just before things began to change. So not only do we have to endure the same awful bullshit from society (or life in the closet in my case) as every trans person before us, we also have to watch the next generation live their lives the way they were meant too. Spending their childhood, adolescence, and twenties as their true selves, and developing near-indistinguishable from a cis women by virtue of avoiding male puberty. I should probably be happy for them, but I'm not. I just feel pure rage, misery, bitterness, jealousy, and regret. I am angry, not at the them, but at the fact that my only crime was being born 10 years too early.

We are a worthy sacrifice for them.

Rage or not I'd sooner sacrifice each and every person in this thread to make it so the next gen has it far better then us.

It sucks but this is the only life we have and we still are much better off then many people in the past.

 

[Team Alucard]

. HRT is mostly innefective (someboy who starts in the early twenties usually seems to be able to pass quite fast. In my age bracket is is as if I had never taken HRT, except for my limp dick),

I would disagree with that. Even by the early twenties most of the damage has already been done. For example I am 22, and there's no way I would ever be able to pass given my height, build, and facial features.

Passing is 95% bone structure, age is irrelevant after a few years of male puberty. Someone who is short with a slender build and softer facial features could pass at age 40. Another person who is 16 but built like a linebacker would have no chance in hell.

We are a worthy sacrifice for them.

Rage or not I'd sooner sacrifice each and every person in this thread to make it so the next gen has it far better then us.

It sucks but this is the only life we have and we still are much better off then many people in the past.

I'm too selfish for that. I have no desire to be an activist, I'd rather whither away in the closet. My hope is that as science and medicine continues to advance, that someday during my lifetime there will be a way to alter the brain to change people's gender identity.

 

[Eusis]

High dysphoria days suck. And being stuck in the not being passable for life is like a fucking curse. Soon we will be a relic of the past, but I can't but feel robbed of the life I never had and I will never have.

Well, I don't think it'll ever fully go away without some amazing medical breakthroughs, but it can become more commonly accepted and recognized, leaving it mainly for people like me who feel indecisive still and would likely fly under the radar until way too late (and not as late as other generations!) Hell, I want to try AndroGel or whatever just to see how I feel on it since that'd probably make things clearer (and if I'm really male then I have a testosterone deficiency that needs to be addressed.)

 

[Beth Cyra]

I would disagree with that. Even by the early twenties most of the damage has already been done. For example I am 22, and there's no way I would ever be able to pass given my height, build, and facial features.

Passing is 95% bone structure, age is irrelevant after a few years of male puberty. Someone who is short with a slender build and softer facial features could pass at age 40. Another person who is 16 but built like a linebacker would have no chance in hell.



I'm too selfish for that. I have no desire to be an activist, I'd rather whither away in the closet. My hope is that as science and medicine continues to advance, that someday during my lifetime there will be a way to alter the brain to change people's gender identity.

Change your identity?

That isn't going to happen as we are hardwired.

People accepting us maybe but they can't just change our identity with out altering the core of who you are.

I have zero desire to be an activist but I have less desire to wish this on the next gen as well.

 

[Team Alucard]

Change your identity?

That isn't going to happen as we are hardwired.

People accepting us maybe but they can't just change our identity with out altering the core of who you are.

I have zero desire to be an activist but I have less desire to wish this on the next gen as well.

Ultimately, all I want is relief from my dysphoria. The current medical techniques for changing the body are woefully ineffective for many individuals, myself included, so for me the best remedy is to change the brain.

Now obviously there are huge ethical concerns and implications to making such drastic changes to someone's identity, but in the end it is all a personal choice. I would rather be a cis man than a trans woman. Granted, I would rather be a cis woman than a cis man, but science and medicine being able to fundamentally alter the brain seems more likely to happen sooner than full-body transplants, which has zero chances of happening during my lifetime.

 

[Beth Cyra]

Ultimately, all I want is relief from my dysphoria. The current medical techniques for changing the body are woefully ineffective for many individuals, myself included, so for me the best remedy is to change the brain.

Now obviously there are huge ethical concerns and implications to making such drastic changes to someone's identity, but in the end it is all a personal choice. I would rather be a cis man than a trans woman. Granted, I would rather be a cis woman than a cis man, but science and medicine being able to fundamentally alter the brain seems more likely to happen sooner than full-body transplants, which has zero chances of happening during my lifetime.

Well it's certainly not my place to weigh in on those moral/ethical arguments.

I hope that we come up with something to help those who would choose it though.

 

[Eusis]

That'd probably requiring cutting into a brain and figuring out a way to change the hormone receptors in some way, as the alternative is conversion therapy and that doesn't sound particularly effective at best. At worst it's just going to dig that hole deeper.

 

[Beth Cyra]

That'd probably requiring cutting into a brain and figuring out a way to change the hormone receptors in some way, as the alternative is conversion therapy and that doesn't sound particularly effective at best. At worst it's just going to dig that hole deeper.

It is very dangerous ground.

It could lead to all kinds of abuse on younger Trans Folk and make others feel less true about themselves if pressured by society.

 

[Platy]

Now obviously there are huge ethical concerns and implications to making such drastic changes to someone's identity, but in the end it is all a personal choice. I would rather be a cis man than a trans woman. Granted, I would rather be a cis woman than a cis man, but science and medicine being able to fundamentally alter the brain seems more likely to happen sooner than full-body transplants, which has zero chances of happening during my lifetime.

I love you too

Also, with body transplants you would STILL be a trans woman

 

[Eusis]

It is very dangerous ground.

It could lead to all kinds of abuse on younger Trans Folk and make others feel less true about themselves if pressured by society.

Yeah, it really shouldn't be done by anyone but if it is done it should only be consenting informed adults.

 

[Kaywee]

It is very dangerous ground.

It could lead to all kinds of abuse on younger Trans Folk and make others feel less true about themselves if pressured by society.

I agree with Beth because there are still horror stories about conversion therapy on younger kids today.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news...der-identity-clinic-services/article27766580/

 

[Eusis]

I agree with Beth because there are still horror stories about conversion therapy on younger kids today.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news...der-identity-clinic-services/article27766580/

Ms.Galaxy had some anecdotes on that topic to share. Yeah, don't take what I said as remotely giving it credit, perhaps I should've said "make them kill themselves" but that's one expression of digging the hole deeper. More ideally they'd transition anyway but come to resent what was done to them because it's more some kind of insane torture than actual therapy.

 

[Team Alucard]

That'd probably requiring cutting into a brain and figuring out a way to change the hormone receptors in some way, as the alternative is conversion therapy and that doesn't sound particularly effective at best. At worst it's just going to dig that hole deeper.

Surgery and medication are what I was alluding too. Obviously it would require far more advanced technology and knowledge about the brain than we possess today. You can't just cut someone open and poke holes in the brain and hope for the best. I'm not advocating for some ridiculous old-school lobotomy.

Conversion therapy is bunk. It doesn't work. My hypothetical procedure would, but it's meaningless regardless, as it's just a fantasy. But still a slightly more realistic fantasy than transferring the human conscious to an entirely new body.

 

[Platy]

And what is the problem of what we have right now ?

edit :
Lets be more clear : Because everything you said so far has been bullshit.
Anyone can pass. The problem is wanting to look like a supermodel. And yet most supermodels are tall as fuck. Have you seen Grace Jones ?
Have you not watched the olympics last week ? Lots of cis women with full passability with ridiculously huge bones, huge shoulds and square faces.

It is always the same ... people think THEY are the ones who will not be able to pass. The special snowflake. It is not like this is like the basic definition of dysphoria =P

 

[Anura]

Going to have to second platy's comment here. I was the same way before transitioning but after almost two long years I'm finally able to pass perfectly! Heck, I would almost guarantee that nearly every trans person has thought the same things you are. Please, just try it, it's worth it. You deserve to be happy.

 

[Butterfly Witch]

Surgery and medication are what I was alluding too. Obviously it would require far more advanced technology and knowledge about the brain than we possess today. You can't just cut someone open and poke holes in the brain and hope for the best. I'm not advocating for some ridiculous old-school lobotomy.

Conversion therapy is bunk. It doesn't work. My hypothetical procedure would, but it's meaningless regardless, as it's just a fantasy. But still a slightly more realistic fantasy than transferring the human conscious to an entirely new body.

I personally think it's an insane idea to try to alter someone's personality and core self instead of changing their bodies, which are much more elastic and adaptable.


Platy has it right, not everyone can be a super model and that's okay, no one's perfect. There's a reason my magazine models are photoshopped as fuck, no one actually has those features naturally.

Passing as a woman is not the same as passing for a gorgeous woman, plenty of cis women out there that are ugly as a boot but they're still women.Genetic lottery is a different issue from being trans and just because you are probably not going to be the next Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Serena Williams, Maria Sharapova, Mila Kunis or what-have-you it doesn't mean that you aren't a woman just like every single one of them.

Don't let mainstream beauty culture tell you who you can or can't be.

 

[Platy]

To help my argument ... look at this pic :

Quite surprised about how much a good haircut can do to my selfsteem and passability:

THIS is the same person who wrote :

Since passability and accepting my situation are beyond my possibilities, trying to fix my mind is the only choice I have.

And this beautiful woman is talking to

I would disagree with that. Even by the early twenties most of the damage has already been done. For example I am 22, and there's no way I would ever be able to pass given my height, build, and facial features.

The current medical techniques for changing the body are woefully ineffective for many individuals, myself included, so for me the best remedy is to change the brain.

A person who was younger than me when I started about how a procedure that the person has never tryed will certaintly be ineffective for said person.
By younger than me I mean "younger than the person who, while being cursed in a hater forum, 'looks like Margaret Cho' was the most evil thing a person choose to say to me"

And of course the classic "never too old to start transition" tumblr post is always good
https://transgenderteensurvivalguid...hi-im-25-and-debating-starting-male-to-female
specialy because includes a fun example of the "broad shoulder, wide person, manly features" that transitioned smoothly

But then again most of what Team Alucard posted sounds like "trans women will never be real women" and to those transphobic ideas need to be atacked on a different front =P

 

[Eusis]

You probably need super hard machine features to "not pass" and some cis women have those anyway. I remember a girl in school who had a Jay Leno chin for example.

And we'd probably sooner figure out how to alter a body with higher precision and generate tissue/organs before figuring out how to swap a brain around safely... And that'd kind of open the door anyway via straight generating female reproductive organs that will take care of everything. Nevermind something like that being the key to immortality short of violent death.

 

[AppleSeason]

Yeah, "thanks" for quoting pictures improving passability is not the same as passing. I just said that it made me look a bit more normal. That picture has nothing to do with how I look in reality and it's just a way of deluding myself for a few days. How I look is not the same as passing. I have gotten clocked with that picture (and only the picture, I haven't talked about voice (that's me to blame), and given its cheat angles and perfect hairdo (I can't even get close to that on my own), it's so far from reality that it's making me miserable about meeting people in dating apps where that's my pic and letting them see how I actually look in reality. Not to mention that my wide shoulders are more bone than muscles (what wide shoulders are made of on a female), even if I usually don't talk about my body. I'm not exactly tiny or slim, and that usually being fairly low weight and with considerable loss of muscle after 3 years on HRT. And when I say "therapy to fix my mind", I mean accepting not being passable and remaining in forced visibility hell.

Got a quotation today for jaw and chin contouring. 270,000 THB, roughly 7000€ with xe's exchange rate. And that's what I'm trying to hide with that angle in the photo. I have a pretty square jaw. He also proposed a chin implant, but I am going to pass on that one. My chin my be slightly receded, but I'm not a fan of having foreign materials inside my body, as the implants proved.

Who knows, it may be the 2018 surgery if I manage to save again. For now I may try to hope I get some fat in the face after SRS. No quotation for lipo transference of upgrading the implants, as Chett requires full body pictures for those.


PD: And damnit. last Saturday I managed to style my hair into something similar to the picture. By the time I left home first it reverted to waves, and a few hours later it went into full frizz curl. Fucking humidity magnet.

 

[Nomadic Sparks]

To help my argument ... look at this pic :



THIS is the same person who wrote :



And this beautiful woman is talking to





A person who was younger than me when I started about how a procedure that the person has never tryed will certaintly be ineffective for said person.
By younger than me I mean "younger than the person who, while being cursed in a hater forum, 'looks like Margaret Cho' was the most evil thing a person choose to say to me"

And of course the classic "never too old to start transition" tumblr post is always good
https://transgenderteensurvivalguid...hi-im-25-and-debating-starting-male-to-female
specialy because includes a fun example of the "broad shoulder, wide person, manly features" that transitioned smoothly

But then again most of what Team Alucard posted sounds like "trans women will never be real women" and to those transphobic ideas need to be atacked on a different front =P

I'am happy you posted these pics

and also Team Alucard is on my ignore list

Fuck you and your awful shit posts

 

[Team Alucard]

A person who was younger than me when I started about how a procedure that the person has never tryed will certaintly be ineffective for said person.
By younger than me I mean "younger than the person who, while being cursed in a hater forum, 'looks like Margaret Cho' was the most evil thing a person choose to say to me"

And of course the classic "never too old to start transition" tumblr post is always good
https://transgenderteensurvivalguide...male-to-female
specialy because includes a fun example of the "broad shoulder, wide person, manly features" that transitioned smoothly

You already posted that exact same timeline before, and I already explained to you why it is a bad example to use to display the effectiveness of HRT. That person's problem was muscle and facial hair. Both of which are easily remedied with a caloric deficit, anti-androgen, and laser/electro. Despite her bulky appearance in the before photos, she actually had a rather slender frame buried underneath all the muscle. And even in the before photos you can tell that her facial features weren't too masculine. She had a nice round face shape, a smooth chin and jaw, up-turned nose, and a relatively flat forehead.

I am 6'2. I weigh 140 lbs. My BMI is underweight. I have been underweight my entire life due to suffering from eating disorders. Senior year of high school I weighed 125 lbs. That is sickly underweight. However, do I look slender or lithe? No. I actually look quite bulky, and its because of my bone structure, particularly the shoulders and the ribcage. My shoulders measure 40 inches around. My ribcage 35 inches. You can see the entire outline of the collarbone and shoulders, you can see my ribs. These proportions are not going to change on HRT because they are due to bone rather than soft tissue such as muscle and fat. And as if being tall isn't bad enough, most of my height lies within my torso rather than my legs, and I have ridiculously long arms.

I can tell you that I will never have results like that timeline because I know my own body. HRT is not going to make me any smaller, because all that's left at the moment is skin and bone. FFS, I look bigger than MOST MEN I see on a daily basis on campus and at work, excluding the ones who are overweight obviously.

And that's just the body, that doesn't even go into how badly my face is fucked. I have a huge brow, large nose that curves downward at the tip, a jaw like John Mccain, and a very square and asymmetrical chin. All of that could potentially be fixed by FFS, but what can't be fixed is the long, oblong facial structure, and overall head size. Someone might be able to pass with a long face and big head if their body is slim and petite, but I've already gone over how that is not the case with me.

And like I already said, age is irrelevant once you're past puberty. The only thing a 20 year old has over a 40 year old is that they likely haven't been hit hard by MPB yet. What really matters is bone structure, and many individuals, including myself, simply have a bone structure that is fucked beyond repair.

 

[Platy]

You already posted that exact same timeline before, and I already explained to you why it is a bad example to use to display the effectiveness of HRT. That person's problem was muscle and facial hair. Both of which are easily remedied with a caloric deficit, anti-androgen, and laser/electro. Despite her bulky appearance in the before photos, she actually had a rather slender frame buried underneath all the muscle. And even in the before photos you can tell that her facial features weren't too masculine. She had a nice round face shape, a smooth chin and jaw, up-turned nose, and a relatively flat forehead.

I am 6'2. I weigh 140 lbs. My BMI is underweight. I have been underweight my entire life due to suffering from eating disorders. Senior year of high school I weighed 125 lbs. That is sickly underweight. However, do I look slender or lithe? No. I actually look quite bulky, and its because of my bone structure, particularly the shoulders and the ribcage. My shoulders measure 40 inches around. My ribcage 35 inches. You can see the entire outline of the collarbone and shoulders, you can see my ribs. These proportions are not going to change on HRT because they are due to bone rather than soft tissue such as muscle and fat. And as if being tall isn't bad enough, most of my height lies within my torso rather than my legs, and I have ridiculously long arms.

I can tell you that I will never have results like that timeline because I know my own body. HRT is not going to make me any smaller, because all that's left at the moment is skin and bone. FFS, I look bigger than MOST MEN I see on a daily basis on campus and at work, excluding the ones who are overweight obviously.

And that's just the body, that doesn't even go into how badly my face is fucked. I have a huge brow, large nose that curves downward at the tip, a jaw like John Mccain, and a very square and asymmetrical chin. All of that could potentially be fixed by FFS, but what can't be fixed is the long, oblong facial structure, and overall head size. Someone might be able to pass with a long face and big head if their body is slim and petite, but I've already gone over how that is not the case with me.

And like I already said, age is irrelevant once you're past puberty. The only thing a 20 year old has over a 40 year old is that they likely haven't been hit hard by MPB yet. What really matters is bone structure, and many individuals, including myself, simply have a bone structure that is fucked beyond repair.

And I still don't believe in you.
BUT THE SAKE OF THE ARGUMENT, lets say that I believe in you that you are "fucked beyond repair"

Do you really want to be miserable or you want to be yourself ?
Why looking ugly is such a HUGE barrier to stop you from being yourself ?????

You don't look happy AT ALL. And dreaming about insane sci fi stuff that will not exist for the next hundred years is USELESS. You have a DISEASE and the cure is more cowbell proved THOUSAND TIMES ALREADY to be BEING YOURSELF and take some hrt and maybe srs.

Also, I am curious.Bring me some examples of people who fit your style and the transition didn't worked.... you must have like thousands to say those things AGAIN and AGAIN

 

[Eusis]

Might be best to try to view it brutally pragmatically: your brain expects at least a certain hormone and it never has enough of that. Unless you feel like shit on HRT but then that's a natural weeding process.

 

[Beth Cyra]

I personally think it's an insane idea to try to alter someone's personality and core self instead of changing their bodies, which are much more elastic and adaptable.


Platy has it right, not everyone can be a super model and that's okay, no one's perfect. There's a reason my magazine models are photoshopped as fuck, no one actually has those features naturally.

Passing as a woman is not the same as passing for a gorgeous woman, plenty of cis women out there that are ugly as a boot but they're still women.Genetic lottery is a different issue from being trans and just because you are probably not going to be the next Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Serena Williams, Maria Sharapova, Mila Kunis or what-have-you it doesn't mean that you aren't a woman just like every single one of them.

Don't let mainstream beauty culture tell you who you can or can't be.

BW speaks wisely.

I don't wish negatively on you Alucard but I hope these kinda things never come to pass.

Then again a sociopath that would sooner cut a bitch then shake their hand so I'm admittedly not the most empathetic person.

 

[WaffleTaco]

Team Alucard, I think that you would feel a lot better about yourself if you have transitioning a chance and allowed hormones to work. If you keep thinking that you won't pass and that you won't transition well, than you are going to believe it. Confidence is a huge part of passing. It's could be a hard journey for you, or it could be an easy one. You will never know until you give it a chance. Postive thoughts can help your mind in so many ways. I'm sorry you are feeling so bad about yourself. Now this is an unconventional method of transitioning, but have you ever considered going on hormones, but trying to still present as male and not socially transition? It could really help you feel better about yourself, especially if your brain is getting the correct impulses from estrogen. Then if you are feeling comfortable enough you can try and socially transition. If you are not talk to a therapist I think you should. It could really help a lot.

 

[Team Alucard]

And I still don't believe in you.
BUT THE SAKE OF THE ARGUMENT, lets say that I believe in you that you are "fucked beyond repair"

Do you really want to be miserable or you want to be yourself ?
Why looking ugly is such a HUGE barrier to stop you from being yourself ?????

You don't look happy AT ALL. And dreaming about insane sci fi stuff that will not exist for the next hundred years is USELESS. You have a DISEASE and the cure is more cowbell proved THOUSAND TIMES ALREADY to be BEING YOURSELF and take some hrt and maybe srs.

Also, I am curious.Bring me some examples of people who fit your style and the transition didn't worked.... you must have like thousands to say those things AGAIN and AGAIN

My dysphoria is mainly physical. When people refer to me with male pronouns it doesn't really bother me. When I see my reflection however I want to weep. Transition isn't going to do much to help reduce my dysphoria if I still look like a man.

And you can't just look at transition vs. not-transition in a bubble. You have to consider the immense social and economic cost of transitioning. Its not worth it to me to lose my family, my financial, emotional, and physical security, my career aspirations, and risk my health with several invasive surgeries just to look like a younger and more feminine man.

Living with crippling dysphoria > living will slightly less crippling dysphoria + abandonment + poverty + health risks.

Now this is an unconventional method of transitioning, but have you ever considered going on hormones, but trying to still present as male and not socially transition? It could really help you feel better about yourself, especially if your brain is getting the correct impulses from estrogen. Then if you are feeling comfortable enough you can try and socially transition. If you are not talk to a therapist I think you should. It could really help a lot.

This was my original plan, but since the start of the semester I have been feeling a lot more defeatist to the point where I don't even want to bother with it anymore.
And I have seen a therapist. She wasn't any help, but to be fair I wasn't really participating in good faith, just to get a referral for HRT.

 

[Platy]

Part of me wants to say that you can't be sure about anything you said in your post, that you should give people a chance, that if people don't like you after your transition they never liked you anyway so fuck them .... and that you still didn't gave me actual examples of real transitions to support your argument.


and the other part of me wants to say "fuck you in your urethra".

But ok you want oppresion olympics ?
I live in the country where it has every single week a news about a trans person being brutally murdered with the biggest raw number of trans deaths in the world, without any single law to help us, with comedy tv shows joking about us, a country full of politicians who think we should root in hell.USA has laws forbiding trans children of using the bathroom ? WELL be happy that trans childre ARE in schools. I transitioned, I look UGLY and I will probably never have the money to do a single surgery and I don't regret a single second of that decision.

So if you are not going to do anything, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN THIS THREAD ?
If you are coming here at least PART of you wants to do it because WHAT DO YOU EXPECT US TO TELL YOU ?
Go ask an Alt Right forum if you want for reasons not to transition =P

 

[Team Alucard]

So if you are not going to do anything, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN THIS THREAD ?
If you are coming here at least PART of you wants to do it because WHAT DO YOU EXPECT US TO TELL YOU ?
Go ask an Alt Right forum if you want for reasons not to transition =P

I usually don't post in here because I never have anything positive to say.

But AppleSeason's post about how she missed the boat compared to the next generation of trans women resonated with me so strongly that I felt compelled to chime in. And then you and I started going at it.

I have nothing further to say so I'm just going to back out now.

 

[Beth Cyra]

I usually don't post in here because I never have anything positive to say.

But AppleSeason's post about how she missed the boat compared to the next generation of trans women resonated with me so strongly that I felt compelled to chime in. And then you and I started going at it.

I have nothing further to say so I'm just going to back out now.

This thread is meant for everyone Alucard including those like you and Cis folk who want to speak to us and learn.

You do not have to leave but you must understand for some Trans Folk it's going to be upsetting to hear some of this stuff. Even more when you post in other threads you consider your self a Gay man.

Going back and forth for our community leads to ruin and lost lives.

Folk like Platy mean well and are actually great for some folks as they can get through.

There are others though like me who don't give a fuck one way or another but it's never that you have to leave.

 

[mollipen]

Do you really want to be miserable or you want to be yourself ?
Why looking ugly is such a HUGE barrier to stop you from being yourself ?????

If I didn't think I'd have a good shot at passing, I may never have transitioned. I know some in the trans community are on the "passing doesn't matter and it's a stupid bar to judge your progress by" train, but it means a lot to some of us. I don't want to drag through the rest of my life as the "trans woman" that everyone can say they know or saw at the grocery store or whatever.

And for every "holy crap" example you can give of how HRT and whatnot else can affect a person, there's an example of someone where it did little good. A lot of it IS about where you're starting off from, and just because some people get lucky doesn't mean that's going to be the common outcome. HRT is a complete roll of the dice.

 

[Beth Cyra]

If I didn't think I'd have a good shot at passing, I may never have transitioned. I know some in the trans community are on the "passing doesn't matter and it's a stupid bar to judge your progress by" train, but it means a lot to some of us. I don't want to drag through the rest of my life as the "trans woman" that everyone can say they know or saw at the grocery store or whatever.

And for every "holy crap" example you can give of how HRT and whatnot else can affect a person, there's an example of someone where it did little good. A lot of it IS about where you're starting off from, and just because some people get lucky doesn't mean that's going to be the common outcome. HRT is a complete roll of the dice.

This is sadly true.

I'm just lucky I adore being the Tranny so not passing isn't as bad as it could be for me.

 

[Platy]

If I didn't think I'd have a good shot at passing, I may never have transitioned. I know some in the trans community are on the "passing doesn't matter and it's a stupid bar to judge your progress by" train, but it means a lot to some of us. I don't want to drag through the rest of my life as the "trans woman" that everyone can say they know or saw at the grocery store or whatever.

And for every "holy crap" example you can give of how HRT and whatnot else can affect a person, there's an example of someone where it did little good. A lot of it IS about where you're starting off from, and just because some people get lucky doesn't mean that's going to be the common outcome. HRT is a complete roll of the dice.

I also know lots of examples of people who started transition with "omfg needs to be stealth" and now they understand the difficulties of the life we live here and the work activism need to do, now they understand that not passing is a political statement. Being visibly trans is an act of activism that makes changes happen. And you end up taking pride of passing sometimes and other not. you take pride of being visibly a knife on society's cut of ignoring transphobia.
Being the "trans women at the grocery store" will make news about bathroom stuff feel more closer to home to anyone who visits that meet you at the grocery store and people will actualy have to THINK about real people not just generic bogeymans

And yes, HRT might be a roll of the dice, but you will never know till you try and EVEN IF YOU GET A CRITICAL FAILURE, you will STILL feel better about yourself because you are .... BEING YOURSELF

Japan has huge suicide rates and they are cis people being cis who loves to be cis but society doesn't allow them to be themselves =P

 

[mollipen]

And yes, HRT might be a roll of the dice, but you will never know till you try and EVEN IF YOU GET A CRITICAL FAILURE, you will STILL feel better about yourself because you are .... BEING YOURSELF

Yeah, I don't agree with that, and I think that sentiment leads people to jumping into transitioning when they should instead be taking more time to make sure they understand the potential outcomes, if it's really what they want, and be sure there's no other solution that would work for them.

Some people who go into transitioning has expectations for how they'll end up, and when they don't reach that point they fall apart. There are people who absolutely are better off even if they don't pass, because of situations like what you're saying. But that's in no way the case for everyone, and should never be presented as such.

 

[Platy]

And the problem are people's expectation to become a supermodel, not being yourself or what hrt did to them. And people's expectations are VERY easy to change.

Falling apart from not being what society expects from a pretty women is part of the life of most cis women too =P

edit : we are on a forum with an active thread where a person said Keira Knightley is not attractive

 

[mollipen]

I'm just lucky I adore being the Tranny so not passing isn't as bad as it could be for me.

To be doubly clear, I've got zero problem with people who enjoy fitting into that role—hell, even I enjoy it sometimes. I'm just the type of person who appreciated the ability to turn it off, and be that when I want to, not 24/7 because I have to.

 

[Risette]

And I have seen a therapist. She wasn't any help, but to be fair I wasn't really participating in good faith, just to get a referral for HRT.

Why not self-med? No point in going to a therapist if you're not participating in good faith.

 

[Kaywee]

Why not self-med? No point in going to a therapist if you're not participating in good faith.

Self medicating with HRT is very dangerous and shouldn't even be suggested. I do think they should find a new therapist that they feel comfortable enough to participate in good faith.

 

[Team Alucard]

Why not self-med? No point in going to a therapist if you're not participating in good faith.

I already got a referral for HRT. Besides there's an informed consent clinic 10 minutes from my apartment so I could easily go that route. But I'd rather try and see if I can get insurance to cover it instead.

But its probably irrelevant because I don't think I even want to try HRT anymore. Its fucking pointless with my build.

Walking back from my last class was brutal. So many young guys with super slim torso builds reminding me of just how much of a ridiculous outlier I am. its like twink city here, Even the bigger guys are only big because of muscle or fat. I may have to withdraw from my classes. its only a week into the term and dysphoria is already annihilating me.

 

[tearsofash]

Do most clothing stores have measuring tape? I don't know my sizes in female, as I've been male-presenting all my life and only buy the occasional skirt. Or at least would they be able to help me out in getting the right size? I'm thinking of going to a torrid on the off chance I get some money for my birthday

 

[Beth Cyra]

I already got a referral for HRT. Besides there's an informed consent clinic 10 minutes from my apartment so I could easily go that route. But I'd rather try and see if I can get insurance to cover it instead.

But its probably irrelevant because I don't think I even want to try HRT anymore. Its fucking pointless with my build.

Walking back from my last class was brutal. So many young guys with super slim torso builds reminding me of just how much of a ridiculous outlier I am. Even the bigger guys are only big because of muscle or fat. I may have to withdraw from my classes. its only a week into the term and dysphoria is already annihilating me.

Many trans folk do not transition or do HRT.

Nothing wrong with that. Choice is yours to make. Can you handle being a ugly chick to everyone? Or just yourself?

I'm ugly I know it. My voice is deep I'm huge boned and I'll never be like many of our board herwith.

So your not alone in that.

 

[Team Alucard]

Many trans folk do not transition or do HRT.

Nothing wrong with that. Choice is yours to make. Can you handle being a ugly chick to everyone? Or just yourself?

I'm ugly I know it. My voice is deep I'm huge boned and I'll never be like many of our board herwith.

So your not alone in that.

I don't want to transition. But I don't want to go on as I am any longer. I've tried ignoring and repressing everything. It doesn't work.


I contemplate suicide a lot. But I don't want to hurt my family. But it's starting to get to the point where I can't tolerate the pain anymore.

 

[Platy]

I contemplate suicide a lot. But I don't want to hurt my family. But it's starting to get to the point where I can't tolerate the pain anymore.

Do you live in japan or something ?
Whay do you care about "hurting your family" more than your own self ?
Shouldn't your family be happy that you didn't killed yourself and now express your true self ?

Considering your other post history that makes you sound like soemone with a HUGE internalized transphobia, I would guess that your family is the reason ... so if it is a family that thinks you will be better dead than trans than I would transition just to spite them =P

 

[Beth Cyra]

I don't want to transition. But I don't want to go on as I am any longer.


I contemplate suicide a lot. But I don't want to hurt my family. But it's starting to get to the point where I can't tolerate the pain anymore.

I can understand that I'm obsessed with Death and Pain.

I won't endorse suicide but I also don't try to talk folks out of it.

It seems like you are unwilling to transition not that you just don't wanna based on your assumed results.

If your family loves ya, you staying around like this won't bring them happiness.

Gotta find something to live for cause this won't get better.

 

[Team Alucard]

I can understand that I'm obsessed with Death and Pain.

I won't endorse suicide but I also don't try to talk folks out of it.

It seems like you are unwilling to transition not that you just don't wanna based on your assumed results.

If your family loves ya, you staying around like this won't bring them happiness.

Gotta find something to live for cause this won't get better.

If I could go back in time 10 years and start HRT before puberty destroyed my body, I would.

But given the results I can realistically expect with modern medicine, I'm not interested in transitioning. That's why I'm so attracted to the idea of changing the brain via surgery. Despite the questionable ethics, I see it as my only salvation.

 

[Platy]

If I could go back in time 10 years and start HRT before puberty destroyed my body, I would.

But given the results I can realistically expect with modern medicine, I'm not interested in transitioning. That's why I'm so attracted to the idea of changing the brain via surgery. Despite the questionable ethics, I see it as my only salvation.

Everytime you mention the results you can expect I want more to see what kind of results you saw on the internet that had before pics that looks like your body type that you saw =P

 

[Beth Cyra]

If I could go back in time 10 years and start HRT before puberty destroyed my body, I would.

But given the results I can realistically expect with modern medicine, I'm not interested in transitioning. That's why I'm so attracted to the idea of changing the brain via surgery. Despite the questionable ethics, I see it as my only salvation.

Then you have no salvation.

It's not possible and as cruel as it maybe to say this to you it's good it's not nor should it be.

Your in pain and I won't down play that but going back ten years wouldn't fix everything and I hope one day you find solace in some form.

I just hope you never get the out you want for the sake of all those like you and I.

 

[mollipen]

Do most clothing stores have measuring tape? I don't know my sizes in female, as I've been male-presenting all my life and only buy the occasional skirt. Or at least would they be able to help me out in getting the right size? I'm thinking of going to a torrid on the off chance I get some money for my birthday

One of three things I'd do:
1: Have a female friend help you, as they'd be better judges of size
2: Go to a store that's not focused on clothing (like a Target or Walmart), grab different sizes of the exact same piece of clothing, take them to the dressing rooms you're comfortable with, and try them all. Super easy to do with jeans and tops, gets a bit trickier once you start getting into dress sizes and all of that.
3: Go to a clothing store that specializes in your body type, and ask a female clerk for help.

#2 will get you a decent way into some things, but you're going to run into situations where you need proper fittings. #3 is brutal to do in the early going, and you run the risk of finding a clerk who will be weirded out by the situation—but there's also a good chance that you'll find someone who is understanding and happy to help.

At worst, anyone in this situation can always pull the "I want to go dressed as a woman for Halloween / party because of the theme" card if it makes it easier.

 

[Team Alucard]

Everytime you mention the results you can expect I want more to see what kind of results you saw on the internet that had before pics that looks like your body type that you saw =P

Timelines and pictures in general can be very misleading due to a lack of scale and magic angle and lighting abuse.

I compare my body to the average people around my age that I see in my daily life. I look huge compared to anyone who isn't either overweight or a bodybuilder. My head, shoulders, and ribcage are all significantly bigger compared to the average MAN I see on a daily basis, let alone woman. But since you keep asking, here's some pictures.

.

Those are from 6 months ago. I've lost about 15 lbs since then, but I don't look much different-- a little less stomach fat and thinner legs I guess.

Like I said though, pictures are near worthless and do not accurately capture how someone looks in real life.

Here are my measurements. These were taken by myself so they might not be 100% accurate.

Height: 6'1.5
Shoulder width: 17 inches
Underbust: 34 inches
Waist: 29 inches
Hips: 36 inches
Head circumference: 22.5 inches
Foot size 10.5 (USA mens)
Hand size: 7.5 inches

 

[mollipen]

But since you keep asking, here's some pictures.

Honest opinions:

* I think your face has possibility with hormones. I've seen similar "before" faces that didn't turn out too bad. Proper brows would help, of course. I'm not going to comment on the need for FFS, because I'm not familiar enough with all of that.
* Your shoulders are wide, and there's nothing much you can do about that. You can absolutely find clothing that'd help make them less noticeable, but that limits the amount of clothing you can wear.
* Your general body weight is in a pretty good place I think. Your hips would beef up on HRT, which would help your body line. But you're skinny enough that you'll have better options for clothing in that regard, even though height does complicate things. 34" chest also makes things easier for you than some of us.
* I'm 5'7" with feet bigger than yours. So, yeah, you're in better shape than I am shoe-wise.

 

[Platy]

Height: 6'1.5
Shoulder width: 17 inches
Underbust: 34 inches
Waist: 29 inches
Hips: 36 inches
Head circumference: 22.5 inches
Foot size 10.5 (USA mens)
Hand size: 7.5 inches

Mollipen already commented on your face (and longer hair do WONDERS to most types of faces) so I will focus on the body.
I do will say that you gives some Drag King vibes with that look and short hair =P

Gwendolyn Christie is a cis woman known for her Game of Thrones role.

This totaly cisgender woman weights 6’3″ (which is 190 cm for us the rest of the world =P), which is 14cm more than you, you small girl !

According to the this celebrity body measurements site focused on cisgender people, she has a 37-30-37 inches in the totaly cisgender breast-waist-hips ratio, which compared to your 34-29-36 you are actualy 3-1-1 inces smaller.

BUT I MADE MORE COMPARISONS !

Here is the best image of her natural cisgender body that I found in a neutral position in clothing that shows her nature given body shrunk to your size to compare body proportions !

In other words, she is fatter than you

It also mentions that her cisgender feminine foot is 12.5 ... but I have no idea how the USA way works =P

And of course HRT does wonders to fat distribution in the body AND muscle disappearance so even your arms can get smaller =O
There is even someone on this thread that says that her feet got smaller but that is a rare case =P

Also, for some fun ... I don't have much pics of pre transition so you are going to have to believe on this one since it is hard to see on this almost nsfw pic :

I had a bigger inverted triangle than yours .... so worst case scenario, get fat ! xD