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Transgaf: 'cause boys will be girls (and vice versa)
- Thread starter lexi
- Start date
Instigator
Banned
Poison has some of the most disturbing fan-art out there. The stuff posted here is mild and no worse than the stuff posted in the RE fanart thread in the gaming section.
dream
Member
Yeah, yall weird.
To change the subject (and scrub those horrible, horrible pictures from my retinas), there was this debate about a year ago about which public bathrooms trans people should use and there were the usual slippery slope arguments that tend to happen and I don't think anything was ever resolved. So I thought yall might be interested in this: http://life.salon.com/2012/02/23/bathrooms_the_new_transgender_battleground/
To change the subject (and scrub those horrible, horrible pictures from my retinas), there was this debate about a year ago about which public bathrooms trans people should use and there were the usual slippery slope arguments that tend to happen and I don't think anything was ever resolved. So I thought yall might be interested in this: http://life.salon.com/2012/02/23/bathrooms_the_new_transgender_battleground/
I actually had this discussion with my best friend a few days ago. My current feeling is, I'll go in the room I'm dressed for, and just use a stall no matter what. And if someone has a problem with that, then what the hell are you doing to have reason to have a problem with that, ya weirdo?
dream
Member
I think people that oppose the idea of trans people using whatever bathroom is appropriate for them to use do so on the presumption that trans people are scary predators who are looking to prey on unsuspecting (god I hate this word, but nothing else comes to mind at the moment) cis people. Which, if you think about it for a few seconds, is just as dumb as the "gay people shouldn't be allowed in the same locker room as us because they're just gonna look at our dicks" thing...but that's how some people think, I guess.
Oh, I know where the "problem" comes from, and those people can generally fuck off. If I'm presenting a consistent gender image, the only reason someone would have any problem with me using the ladies' room is if they think I don't look female enough. (Or if they 'snoop', but shit, who's the real predator there?) They'd be causing a fuss about every homely woman that passes by if they're like that.
Exactlythe argument could get very silly very quickly. If somebody who is trans is presenting as female, but is told they had to use the men's restroom because they could be a "predator", then a man who is gay must be forced to use the women's restroom for the same reason.
It's a little amusing when we get a victory so easily like that. Partly because like you said, it highlights how much of a non-issue the issue is, and partly because I know enough trans girls that are so eager to fight battles no matter what that they almost get disappointed when there's no struggle. I appreciate people fighting for rights, but I don't always like those who fight just to fight.
dream
Member
Yeah - like you said earlier, people freaking out about what other people do in public bathrooms reflects more on their mindset than anything. If I'm doing my thing at urinal and a transdude walked in to do his business, I would never know that he was trans because I just absolutely do not give a shit about other people's bathroom habits. Caring about how someone pees is just, well, weird.
And I'm with you on the other thing too. I think there are a lot of things worth fighting for but I also think there are times people just crusade for the sake of crusading and that just dilutes the message.
And I'm with you on the other thing too. I think there are a lot of things worth fighting for but I also think there are times people just crusade for the sake of crusading and that just dilutes the message.
NewGamePlus
Member
The bathroom issue is also one of those silly things that is predicated on the notion that all trans people are in some way visibly trans. Like everyone would be magically ok with me using the men's room again, when actually I used to catch double-takes, stares and just generally awkward moments when I used to go in there. Then I switched and not once has there been an issue. So yay, sorted, everyone is happy. Let's leave it be.
I've never seen a transsexual at a stall, but seeing such a scenario has to be highly spectacular.
NewGamePlus
Member
Well, that was a long time ago. I wasn't convinced I looked like a girl yet ._.
Crazy, I can't believe it's been two years already.
water_wendi
Water is not wet!
It feels so much more recent than 2 years ago.
Instigator
Banned
Yeah, the bathroom talk is a bit low brow.
NewGamePlus
Member
You know, I feel silly now realizing it's been almost two years since I started HRT and I still haven't changed my ID at all. I just got into mini-argument at the store trying to convince the cashier that I'm really me. Luckily his manager believed me. Has anyone else had this problem?
Would someone please convince me to take the time to legally change my name, or at least go to the DMV for a new photo?
Would someone please convince me to take the time to legally change my name, or at least go to the DMV for a new photo?
InfiniteNine
Rolling Girl
I'm going to have to do that next year. I'd be on HRT for about 6 months by then so I'm hoping it looks flattering. lol Another option is renewing your license online although I'm not sure how the picture situation works on there.
I'm not quite sure I fully understand your circumstances. Are you passing, living fulltime etc? It's been a long time since I've really had any idea about how people that have contributed this thread are going, maybe we could post updates and stuff?
NewGamePlus
Member
Yep, passing and then some apparently. This wasn't the first this has happened. My ID photo is still from when I was 15. It used to be uplifting because hey apparently I'm too pretty to be trans, but now it's like, it's Saturday night, I'm bored and I just want some vodka. Is that too much to ask?
InfiniteNine
Rolling Girl
Should just go early in the morning and get it sorted out before it gets crowded. Shouldn't take you that long and you're free of being accused of not being yourself.
NewGamePlus
Member
True, I should just get it over with on Monday.
NewGamePlus
Member
Hey, someone in this thread could give an outside appraisal of how I'm doing if they ever got back to me. Not to point fingers or anything. 
InfiniteNine
Rolling Girl
Interesting. O: I'm curious!
NewGamePlus
Member
I'm just saying I've been trying to make plans with someone, but someone hasn't talked to me in a couple weeks. I'm not upset or anything. It would just be nice to finally meet her. ^__^
InfiniteNine
Rolling Girl
Well hope you meet up with her! It's fun meeting up with people and I had fun meeting Shidoshi last summer.
NewGamePlus
Member
Did you meet at AX? I haven't been to AX in like years.
InfiniteNine
Rolling Girl
Yeah, we hit the Miku concert together. O: Fun times!
NewGamePlus
Member
I actually have family that lives in and around Austin, maybe we could meet sometime.
InfiniteNine
Rolling Girl
That would be fun! It'd be nice to meet some more people and chat.
I'm willing to bet that that someone, whomever they are, will be contacting you just as soon as that someone is past the ridiculous deadline they found themselves under after getting back from Japan.
Ive been on HRT for ten months, but not much is going on other than that.
NewGamePlus
Member
Vermillion
Banned
Hi everyone. I have a question - how do transsexuals know that they're meant to be the opposite gender? Reading the OP, I know it isn't about sight, and I know it isn't about sexual attraction. So what is the difference between men and women?
This isn't always the easiest question to answer, because it's a hugely emotional/mental thing that has not easy proof.
Which are you, male or female? How do you know? I mean, how do you really know? Just because of the body that you have? Or is it more? If you woke up tomorrow and suddenly your body was the opposite sex, would you suddenly be that sex? Or would the person inside of you still feel like that person you were before?
I'd start there in explaining it. It's a disconnect you feel between your body and your mind/heart. It's the feeling that you don't conncet with the gender that everybody is telling you you are. Being told you're a boy/girl and having absolutely no clue what that means.
Vermillion
Banned
I see. Thank you for the answer
I wasn't going to tackle this because it is hugely complicated and manifests in different people in different ways, but since shidoshi was kind enough to lay the groundwork, I would like to add one thing that may help.
Imagine that after being born, you were raised and socialized as a female against your will. Do you think that you would still consider yourself a man as an adult?
EDIT: 2 years already? Thanks for thread Lexi - this thread was incredibly helpful when I first began to seriously question my own gender, and seeing it pop up 2 years ago was the first time that I began to suspect that my own feelings weren't wrong/crazy(I had dismissed my disphoric thoughts up to that point as over-imaginative fantasy). When I began to seriously question my gender two summers ago, this thread again was my primary source of information and became the first place that I felt comfortable talking about my own trans-ness.
On another note, I've recently found myself to be growing a bit impatient waiting to start hormones and am strongly considering DIYing it. The resources page on the trueselves forum led me to reasonably costed bloodwork (hormone panel for females), but I was wondering if there were any other tests I should get as well? I'm living in the states and not insured, so things can get a little pricey, but I also want to be as safe as possible.
Imagine that after being born, you were raised and socialized as a female against your will. Do you think that you would still consider yourself a man as an adult?
EDIT: 2 years already? Thanks for thread Lexi - this thread was incredibly helpful when I first began to seriously question my own gender, and seeing it pop up 2 years ago was the first time that I began to suspect that my own feelings weren't wrong/crazy(I had dismissed my disphoric thoughts up to that point as over-imaginative fantasy). When I began to seriously question my gender two summers ago, this thread again was my primary source of information and became the first place that I felt comfortable talking about my own trans-ness.
On another note, I've recently found myself to be growing a bit impatient waiting to start hormones and am strongly considering DIYing it. The resources page on the trueselves forum led me to reasonably costed bloodwork (hormone panel for females), but I was wondering if there were any other tests I should get as well? I'm living in the states and not insured, so things can get a little pricey, but I also want to be as safe as possible.
Brian Griffin
Member
Wow, 2 years. I've been reading this thread since the beginning and, while I don't post much, I'm always lurking waiting for updates. Personally, I feel this is hands down the best thread on GAF because of how informative it has been for myself and the many others that have wandered in with questions, not to mention all the actual trans folk that have received help and support through their struggles. This thread has helped me understand trans issues just about as well as a cisgender, straight, white man can and it's made me a better person.
Thanks Lexi and everyone else for sharing some of the most personal aspects of your lives.
Thanks Lexi and everyone else for sharing some of the most personal aspects of your lives.
Not that I particularly want to go back to the bulk of the Poison conversation, but this showed up on Joystiq today, seems mildly timely:
http://www.joystiq.com/2012/02/27/poison-was-always-transgendered-and-heres-a-documentary-provin/
http://www.joystiq.com/2012/02/27/poison-was-always-transgendered-and-heres-a-documentary-provin/
Yeah, I found it funny how I just got my Poison stick mod done, and then this shows up. It was a very Poison weekend!
Video was pretty interesting, and I honestly hadn't seen those Poison design images before. Will this change anything in the argument? Sadly, probably not, but it's still nice to see.
Actualy this documentary makes me want Poison to be a cis girl all along .... all the transphobic facts that i didn't knew =/
edit:
LOL
Sended this to the biggest Street Fighter maniac i know (he owns the right to the streetfighter domain in our country) .
5 minutes later he replys to me with almost word to word to the "Poison's gender is completly irrelevant and nobody should care because it adds nothing to the gameplay" argument xD
I found it while at work, so admittedly I haven't actually watched it.
Also: is lethargy, or any sort of general tiredness, a known side effect of hormones? I swear I'm more exhausted than usual this last week.
Women's metabolism are generaly slower than men's, wich results in being less energetic .... but since you are not into any anti-t i would guess it was just because it was an stressfull and important week
Instigator
Banned
I have a question and hopefully this doesn't offend anyone. I tried asking this in the trans friend bouncing around right now but it didn't seem to get answered:
I had relations with a man who considered himself trans, but he had a normal male body and was not going to ever get reassignment surgery. Also he preferred to consider himself genderless and to be called with neutral gender pronouns like ze, they, them, etc.
Is this a transgendered/transsexual person in anyway? Or just a confused person?
I had relations with a man who considered himself trans, but he had a normal male body and was not going to ever get reassignment surgery. Also he preferred to consider himself genderless and to be called with neutral gender pronouns like ze, they, them, etc.
Is this a transgendered/transsexual person in anyway? Or just a confused person?
NewGamePlus
Member
Many terms like transgender and transsexual have various meanings, and sometimes it's hard to suss out just how someone relates to them without asking. However, the most common usage is that transgender is an umbrella term that encompasses anyone who differs from their assigned role in society. That person would probably identify as some sort of genderqueer identity. They aren't necessarily confused in anyway.
As complicated as the trans topic can be, I think it gets way more complicated in situations like this. (Not meaning that in a negative way, just in a realistic one.)
It certainly could be a case of him not really being sure at this point how he feels. It could be that he's more on the androgynous side of things, as in enjoying the feeling of walking that line between male and female. Or maybe they consider themselves like "bigender", as in feeling like both at the same time.
Sometimes, the best way to really understand is just to ask the personif you feel like they'd be willing to talk about it. Gender identity is one of those things where you're always kind of hesitant to say too much, but if you find that a friend is open and genuinely wanting to understand you more, then that person might jump at the chance to explain their feelings in greater detail.