Jason's Ultimatum
Member
But nothing will happen. Look, she's had a few drinks. It's dark, and were out in the middle of nowhere. "Ahh, what do I do? I can't jump out of the car!" She can't refuse, you know, because of the implication.
Dating-Age |OT5| Halp me pls. In the bathroom.
- Thread starter Septimius
- Start date
- Status
But nothing will happen. Look, she's had a few drinks. It's dark, and were out in the middle of nowhere. "Ahh, what do I do? I can't jump out of the car!" She can't refuse, you know, because of the implication.
Been over a year for me and I've dated on and off. Some girls were great fits, but ultimately didn't work out because I guess I'm not 'ready'. Hell, it was November of '14 when my heart was broken and still to this day the one person I think about when I'm alone with my thoughts is my ex. It's a terrible thing.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
actually maybe I should shoot her another text and say on second thought it's better to meet up, and give her a time. Or should i just wait for her to make a decision? Basically I said to her, "I can pick you up. It wouldn't be a problem!"
Silphonica
Banned
Personally, I would just say, "dinner is at x, i will pick you up at x" and arrive to hers in a taxi.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
A taxi? Lol. I'm just going to shoot her a text and say we'll meet up, and give her a time. Last time we met was back in October, but we really never got to talk, so it's too soon for me to pick her up. In know it's late, by what the hell.
Silphonica
Banned
Well, aye, you are still picking her up, and you can both be free to drink as much as you want to. Also its never too soon to pick her up, in fact i would argue it works in your favour to pick her up on the first date. Once you agree on where you are going, tell her a time you are going to pick her up, she will probably ask for a little more time, you say ok, and go.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
I told her we can meet up instead, and gave her a time.
She'll text back tomorrow afternoon with a response.
Yeah, kinda glad I did that now, because she lives 17 miles away. Plus, traffic, it'll take over an hour to pick her up. Fuck that. Last girl I dated lived 12 miles away, and it took an hour to pick her up in the afternoon due to traffic.
ill just wait and see what happens after dinner.
She'll text back tomorrow afternoon with a response.
Yeah, kinda glad I did that now, because she lives 17 miles away. Plus, traffic, it'll take over an hour to pick her up. Fuck that. Last girl I dated lived 12 miles away, and it took an hour to pick her up in the afternoon due to traffic.
ill just wait and see what happens after dinner.
ZackieChan
Member
From what I understand, you've been on many dates. Why are you freaking out about this routine shit?
Silphonica
Banned
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
I don't know. Last two dates I met up with them. Now I'm over analyzing again on what to do with this girl, even though my expectations are in check. Maybe that's why, because I'm trying to sell myself the better applicant that stands out, like a job interview.
I set the time. If she says 7 is good, I'll say perfect, see you then.
It's kinda funny to see folks like yourself put this much thought into the situation.
Not saying you're wrong for doing so. Also not making fun of you either. I just find it kind of enlightening that folks, no matter what their situation, will find some degree of worry.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
I fucked up hard on the last girl i dated, especially when everything was going damn well in the beginning. It still hurts thinking about her, and I don't want to fuck up with this one, since they're similar.
But when I see her Friday, I'll do everything right during the date. So odd.
ElephantShell
Banned
If your main worry is what people on here will think of you, does that not kind of defeat the purpose of the thread?
Maybe you shouldn't post so much and just go with your gut if it's causing you that much distress.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
yeah, I'm staying out of this thread until after the date. I'll let you guys know how it went.
Wish me luck.
ElephantShell
Banned
Godspeed, good man.
Really wanted to get another date in with the girl I'm seeing but then I just had to go and get tonsillitis huh. We kissed this Monday and I started feeling sick on Tuesday, so it's possible I infected her. She says she has no symptoms yet but I guess we'll see lol. Anyway sucks because I want to strike while the iron's hot, but now it seems we probably won't meet for at least a week while this shit mellows down.
Royal_Phalanx
Member
Still debating whether to start talking to a girl who's a friend of a friend on Facebook and get to the point of asking for her number or ask my friend when he's next hanging out with her because I want to get to know her better. I'd prefer to chat and connect with her more in person, honestly, I don't know what your advice for me is, I'm torn on what is the right path to take.
Also another girl on Facebook (the one who started talking to me out of the blue like a month after I added her) says she broke up with her boyfriend recently who she told me 'was an asshole who pretended to love me' and she said she wanted to go out with me after I told her 'hey, if your relationship doesn't pan out my Netflix account is ready, just need you to bring the chill'. She sounds kinda crazy, but I'm a 23 year old virgin and honestly, I'd rather take the opportunity to get laid. It's long fucking overdue for that, should have been getting laid since 1 or 2 years ago.
Also another girl on Facebook (the one who started talking to me out of the blue like a month after I added her) says she broke up with her boyfriend recently who she told me 'was an asshole who pretended to love me' and she said she wanted to go out with me after I told her 'hey, if your relationship doesn't pan out my Netflix account is ready, just need you to bring the chill'. She sounds kinda crazy, but I'm a 23 year old virgin and honestly, I'd rather take the opportunity to get laid. It's long fucking overdue for that, should have been getting laid since 1 or 2 years ago.
Hey if you can get some rebound sex then go for it honestly. If that's really what she's getting at, and you want it too, then just ask her out for a drink, get cozy, invite her back to your place and seal it up.
ZackieChan
Member
So...wtf are you waiting for?
Contacting her on facebook could be a little creepy, unless she finds you attractive.
If you're hot it's not creepy. That's the rule.
radioactivez0r
Member
Dude, the worst thing you can do is dance around it and hope everything falls into place. You need to ask your friend for this girl's number, call her, and be like hey remember me, let's get a drink/coffee/whatever you young kids do. Is it a little forward? Sure. But it eliminates trying to set up some Rube Goldberg machination to see her again.
I`m kind of in a similar position. I ran into a girl`s profile on Tinder that was gorgeous. Saw we had 4 mutual friends. Problem was I either ran out of likes or the app crashed, I don`t remember what happened. Usually Tinder is pretty good with re-introducing people to your Queue if you miss them, but I haven`t come across her again.
I looked her up on FB through my mutual friends, though I don`t know if there`s any way to just come out and straight up talk to her other than going the "I'll be honest.." route, explaining what happened, and telling her I wanted to introduce myself but didn't get the chance to.
Remember that if she swipes left on you, she disappears from your pool. Not trying to discourage you but keep in mind that it's a possibility.
Royal_Phalanx
Member
Eh, I've talked to her for a bit once before at my friend's birthday, it's not like she's some random girl who happens to have a mutual friend on FB. Should have got her number that time, but I thought I was going to play it cool (yes, I'm stupid). Also the crazy fb girl just told me that I shouldn't "date an ugly girl like her". I have no idea what to say in return. Admittedly she isn't that pretty, but I still want to fuck her (she doesn't live in the same city as me so that's a real problem). God, I feel like such a scumbag wanting to just bang a girl who's ex recently broke up with her, called her ugly and told her he was having sex with another girl. I'm getting the "clinging to me like a puppy" vibe from her right now. I'm tempted to gently turn her down or fade so I don't fuck her up even more mentally,tbh
Hmm, that's interesting. There have definitely been times when I've swiped left on girls and I see them some time later coming up again for me. This was like, maybe a month ago so I honestly don't even think she'd remember me if I reached out and messaged her on FB.
@bold1) Then I think you'd be okay to add her as a friend.
@bold2) She's looking for confirmation that she's worth something. The biggest give away for this is just breaking up with her ex.
@bold3) As you should.
Turning her down is the right thing to do.
They probably restarted their accounts then. Or there's some bug, I guess it can happen.
Good evening lads, I come here for some advice because this is a baffling situation.
Context: I dated a girl four years ago, but after 3 month I left (ok I went full ghost) her mostly because it was a time consuming relationship and, god knows I'm a weak man, even if she was really into me I couldn't get over the at-the-time-ex. Half a year ago I contacted her for some news and eventually apologize. I met her a few days after and one thing leading to another, we were in a relationship for like 5 month, then she went full ghost for a month. Tie game. A month later, we meet again, she tells me she did this because she has to be focused on her university studies (is there an english name for that ?), and after a long talk we agreed to still see each other but only 3 or 4 nights a month. Two month later (december 2014 for those who lost the track), it was the final form of the ghosting situation, she deleted me from FB and didn't answer my calls.
Twist !
Two weeks ago she sent me a message to have some news from me. I was working so I didn't answered immediately, and she sent another message, and sent another one on FB. I was a bit confused as you may imagine. I answered, and for three days we texted each other a lot. Note: she didn't even talked about our "break up", she was acting like nothing happened.
So I asked to meet her, because why the hell not, I thought if she sent me 3 texts in a row out of the blue she wanted to see me again. She only answered "Yes why not". Not the most enthusiastic I ever received, but I suggested a meet up after her exams, and she tells me "yes we can meet if you want to". Okay then.
Now, the question is: exams are over, should I send another message to set a date or should I bail the fuck out ? I seriously don't know what to think about all of this. Thank you for reading this long ass post.
Context: I dated a girl four years ago, but after 3 month I left (ok I went full ghost) her mostly because it was a time consuming relationship and, god knows I'm a weak man, even if she was really into me I couldn't get over the at-the-time-ex. Half a year ago I contacted her for some news and eventually apologize. I met her a few days after and one thing leading to another, we were in a relationship for like 5 month, then she went full ghost for a month. Tie game. A month later, we meet again, she tells me she did this because she has to be focused on her university studies (is there an english name for that ?), and after a long talk we agreed to still see each other but only 3 or 4 nights a month. Two month later (december 2014 for those who lost the track), it was the final form of the ghosting situation, she deleted me from FB and didn't answer my calls.
Twist !
Two weeks ago she sent me a message to have some news from me. I was working so I didn't answered immediately, and she sent another message, and sent another one on FB. I was a bit confused as you may imagine. I answered, and for three days we texted each other a lot. Note: she didn't even talked about our "break up", she was acting like nothing happened.
So I asked to meet her, because why the hell not, I thought if she sent me 3 texts in a row out of the blue she wanted to see me again. She only answered "Yes why not". Not the most enthusiastic I ever received, but I suggested a meet up after her exams, and she tells me "yes we can meet if you want to". Okay then.
Now, the question is: exams are over, should I send another message to set a date or should I bail the fuck out ? I seriously don't know what to think about all of this. Thank you for reading this long ass post.
Psychoward
Banned
Hug or nothing, don't handshake.
PflargBlarg
Member
This.
Lucian Cat
Kissed a mod for a tag; liked it
Depending on the type of tonsillitis you have you're unlikely to have been contagious. This is coming from someone who gets it all the time and is also a nurse lol.
That's what I figured. Thanks
Yo, what's the deal with OKC, GAF? I've been off of it for about two years, just reactivated a couple days ago, and both the quality and quantity is so drastically lower as a whole than what it was in the same area last time I was on. Have people migrated to other sites? Is OKC no longer the best free option?
Also, I have a career that pays me money now, so what's up with paid dating sites? Are any of them well-regarded? I'd be willing to try it if there is a vibrant userbase somewhere.
Also, I have a career that pays me money now, so what's up with paid dating sites? Are any of them well-regarded? I'd be willing to try it if there is a vibrant userbase somewhere.
Count Dookkake
Member
What happened to OKC - Tinder. Although tinder started out as a hook-up app, people have used it to find relationships.
If it's been two years, don't reactivate your profile, delete it and start over.
Match.com is probably the best paid site (I tried eHarmony...as an <30, it was terrible). The main benefit of paid sites is you know the people on there are serious. Someone's not going to pay a monthly fee for something they use for giggles at happy hour.
So gaf tell me how my first date went. She did most of the talking via questions I asked, though I think I may have interrupted a couple times. She laughed a lot, not sure if there is anything to that, either enjoyed herself or was uncomfortable?
Didn't even get a hug at the end of the evening, she said maybe we'll see each other again.
So I'm thinking she probably won't see me again, going off of our parting, would that be an accurate assumption?
I'll text her tomorrow saying I had a good time and ask to meet again. That's about all I can do eh?
Didn't even get a hug at the end of the evening, she said maybe we'll see each other again.
So I'm thinking she probably won't see me again, going off of our parting, would that be an accurate assumption?
I'll text her tomorrow saying I had a good time and ask to meet again. That's about all I can do eh?
ElephantShell
Banned
If the conversation was good and she was laughing a lot then I'd say it went pretty well. I wouldn't get too hung up on one detail (the goodbye) if the rest of the date seemed good.
Psychoward
Banned
went on my 2nd date in the 2nd day in a row with the same girl. Well, date being used loosely here, first time was in her common room, 2nd time was in my room/common room. At the end we made out/felt each other up for about 30 minutes and then I walked her back to her dorm in the rain. She's really nice but she immediately grabbed my hand on the way back. If I just got out of a relationship and I'm not looking to go exclusive any time soon should that be a worrying sign? What do I do?
I was at the doc yesterday and it's virus-induced which apparently makes it less contagious. She still has no symptoms so I guess it's fine, phew. Would've been a bad start.
Miles Quaritch
Member
Can attest to this. Found my current girlfriend through Tinder. She was on there after having spent six months getting messed around on OKC and another site whose name I can't remember.
Some people were really starting to flesh out their profiles back then too. Lots of detail. pics, etc. Not just empty profiles, although there were quite of those too.
Etrian Oddity
Member
Tinder for me was nothing but bots and empty profiles. Okc was far more productive, and that's saying something.
Be straightforward and honest.
Psychoward
Banned
Obviously, but when? Next time I see her? Over text before that?
I still need to give her back her umbrella which she insisted I kept
Whenever it feels right. I prefer to do it in person because it's easier for me to talk about it.
"What are you looking for?" is how I generally start it out. It's a vague question that she'll probably ask what you mean, but I find it to be a lot easier to work in and it's not a sudden "in your face" question.
CitizenVectron
Member
So...when does erectile dysfunction become something I should see a doctor about?
Like most guys, every once in a while I can't get hard, or maybe can't stay hard once I have an erection. Sometimes I'd be tired, or stressed out, or who knows what. But in the past few months it's been getting more and more common, and it's really affecting my relationship. My gf keeps asking if I am attracted to her (I am), and sometimes when I can't stay hard, I'll say I love her and she'll respond with "Yeah okay."
It's putting a strain on our relationship because I am stressed out about it, and she thinks it's a reflection of my feelings/attraction towards her when it's nothing to do with her. I'm 31 so it seems early to be facing this problem on a regular basis (I'd say 20%-25% of the time now).
Will a doctor give out ED prescriptions to someone my age in this circumstance? Any advice is appreciated.
Like most guys, every once in a while I can't get hard, or maybe can't stay hard once I have an erection. Sometimes I'd be tired, or stressed out, or who knows what. But in the past few months it's been getting more and more common, and it's really affecting my relationship. My gf keeps asking if I am attracted to her (I am), and sometimes when I can't stay hard, I'll say I love her and she'll respond with "Yeah okay."
It's putting a strain on our relationship because I am stressed out about it, and she thinks it's a reflection of my feelings/attraction towards her when it's nothing to do with her. I'm 31 so it seems early to be facing this problem on a regular basis (I'd say 20%-25% of the time now).
Will a doctor give out ED prescriptions to someone my age in this circumstance? Any advice is appreciated.
It wouldn't hurt if you talked to a doctor. There might be some underlying physical reason like high blood pressure or enlarged prostate that is causing your ED. I don't think your age would be a factor in them prescribing dugs or not, probably a lot of people around your age have similar issues.
If you drink or smoke, you might want to cut back. I was having similar issues with my girlfriend (now wife) but once I quit smoking, it hasn't been an issue since, and I'm an old fart (40).
Edit: also, if you look at a lot of porn and/or masturbate a lot, cut that back also. You can desensitize yourself and become conditioned to respond more to yourself than someone else.
If you drink or smoke, you might want to cut back. I was having similar issues with my girlfriend (now wife) but once I quit smoking, it hasn't been an issue since, and I'm an old fart (40).
Edit: also, if you look at a lot of porn and/or masturbate a lot, cut that back also. You can desensitize yourself and become conditioned to respond more to yourself than someone else.
CitizenVectron
Member
Yeah I've heard about the porn thing. I haven't actually been masturbating a lot lately due to either spending time with her (3-5 nights per week) or I'm out with friends or doing other activities after work, so I'm barely home or alone. I maybe masturbate once per week, and we typically have sex 3-4 times per week.
I don't smoke or drink either, so I can't change that unfortunately.
- Status