I lit up one of my graduate students...

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Aaron said:
One is offensive to gays. The second is offensive to no one. I've heard a number of women say, "That's what she said" in the proper humorous context. Would you make a reference to China, and then add, "haha, no chink." ? I'm guessing no.
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"That's what she said" is concomitant with heteronormativity, which is probably just as detrimental as implicit homophobia. It also offers an unwanted and unwarranted sexualization of females that simultaneously demeans and objectifies an entire gender.

It's arguably worse than "no homo," bro.
 
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Class dismissed.
 
GremlinFool said:
"That's what she said" is concomitant with heteronormativity, which is probably just as detrimental as implicit homophobia. It also offers an unwanted and unwarranted sexualization of females that simultaneously demeans and objectifies an entire gender.

It's arguably worse than "no homo," bro.
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Homophobia is one of the only forms of bigotry that still has a limited social license in modern culture, while blatant sexism (and racism for that matter) is almost universally condemned. Gays are in the thick of the same struggle for equal rights that women and black people were in the last century. You'd have to be wildly out of touch to argue that "that's what she said" is more damaging than "no homo," considering the social standing of women compared to gays at this point in history.

I think you're just trolling though, so I haven't marked you down as a lost cause yet.
 
Wait, so he handed these out to everyone in class?

If some guy came up to me and handed me a chocolate in the shape of a heart and said Happy Valentines Day I would think he was hitting on me. Which I guess is fine, but he's just wasting his time and then you'd have that weird conversation about how you're not gay, but thanks anyway, oh wait I'm not either, etc.

Stupid? Yes. A little crass? Probably. A reason to go off on someone? No.
 
I seem to be missing the entire point of this thread? What's wrong with what the guy did exactly? He was presumably giving out chocolates to both male and female classmates, and so he declared a "no homo" because he is not gay despite giving valentine's day chocolates to other men (not that there's anything wrong with that). I find that amusing, and OP sounds like there's a stick way too far up his ass (no homo).
 
teh_J0kerer said:
I seem to be missing the entire point of this thread? What's wrong with what the guy did exactly? He was presumably giving out chocolates to both male and female classmates, and so he declared a "no homo" because he is not gay despite giving valentine's day chocolates to other men (not that there's anything wrong with that). I find that amusing, and OP sounds like there's a stick way too far up his ass (no homo).
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If only there were already dozens of posts throughout the thread responding to similarly obtuse queries and assertions that you could read.
 
Isn't no-homo just a qualifier used when you wish to be warm and/or complimentary towards a member of the same sex, but want to reassure them that, despite your overt signs of affection/appreciation, your actions are not to be construed in a sexual manner, thus putting them at ease and avoiding any uncomfortableness?
 
teh_J0kerer said:
I seem to be missing the entire point of this thread? What's wrong with what the guy did exactly? He was presumably giving out chocolates to both male and female classmates, and so he declared a "no homo" because he is not gay despite giving valentine's day chocolates to other men (not that there's anything wrong with that). I find that amusing, and OP sounds like there's a stick way too far up his ass (no homo).
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Well, OP is teaching/leading a class and trying to promote a professional environment for his students, there's got to be a line of acceptable in class behaviour - saying or doing something like that in a workplace around people you're not necessarily chummy with could look very odd.

I do agree that the phrase itself is not homophobic or inherent hatred. I saw a few mentions of the word 'homo' being offensive, and I agree that it's often been used as derogatory slang - but in this case I think it's merely been shortened to fit better with the word preceding it.
 
captainnapalm said:
Isn't no-homo just a qualifier used when you wish to be warm and/or complimentary towards a member of the same sex, but want to reassure them that, despite your overt signs of affection/appreciation, your actions are not to be construed in a sexual manner, thus putting them at ease and avoiding any uncomfortableness?
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Sure, just like 'what, are you gay?' is a gentle reminder to your compatriots that it's not very masculine to rebuff the sexual advances of a woman no matter your state of mind or relationship status.

It's all very innocent and does a great job at advancing gender identity!
 
Maybe he just listened to the (edit:) Lonely Island song and thought it's funny... stupid yeah, but it doesn't warrant that reaction imo.

I don't know how it is in the USA but in Germany we students are treated as adults. If a professor shouted at me I'd shout right back. And certainly not leave the class over something like that.
 
captainnapalm said:
Isn't no-homo just a qualifier used when you wish to be warm and/or complimentary towards a member of the same sex, but want to reassure them that, despite your overt signs of affection/appreciation, your actions are not to be construed in a sexual manner, thus putting them at ease and avoiding any uncomfortableness?
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I wouldn't even say it's mainly used after something like that, more often it's something like a double entendre between friends which comes out sounding overtly sexual.

That being said, I don't use it because it's fairly immature.
 
marrec said:
Sure, just like 'what, are you gay?' is a gentle reminder to your compatriots that it's not very masculine to rebuff the sexual advances of a woman no matter your state of mind or relationship status.

It's all very innocent and does a great job at advancing gender identity!
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It seems kind of innocent to me, but I might be wrong.
 
TCRS said:
Maybe he just listened to the Long Island song and thought it's funny... stupid yeah, but it doesn't warrant that reaction imo.

I don't know how it is in the USA but in Germany we students are treated as adults. If a professor shouted at me I'd shout right back.
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I don't know how it is in Germany but here in the US 18 year olds aren't Adults, they think they are but they're really just older teenagers who still have quite a bit of learning to do and a Professor should be ready to teach them.

I think it's great that Bish was able to turn that into a teaching moment about casual bigotry.
 
marrec said:
I don't know how it is in Germany but here in the US 18 year olds aren't Adults, they think they are but they're really just older teenagers who still have quite a bit of learning to do and a Professor should be ready to teach them.

I think it's great that Bish was able to turn that into a teaching moment about casual bigotry.
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In most states they legally are adults. Exceptions: Alabama (19), Mississippi (21), Nebraska (19 or upon marriage) and Puerto Rico (21)
 
I'm conflicted here. I do agree it's inappropriate for a class, college or not, and feel like Bish did good here, but outside of class in most social situations 'no homo' is just a playful thing to say to a clearly heterosexual person. It's definitely not meant to be offensive as far as I can tell and even my gay friends don't mind it at all.

I've probably said it a few times myself, but hell I've even said the inverse in joking ("totally homo") because my friends and I aren't insecure about that shit at all. I guess that's just not a big deal to me.

That said, I am annoyed by calling things 'gay' or 'faggoty.' If that shit went on in my class I'd probably lay down some law. But 'no homo' just doesn't do anything for me.

I guess I'm weird.
 
Gustav said:
In most states they legally are adults. Exceptions: Alabama (19), Mississippi (21), Nebraska (19 or upon marriage) and Puerto Rico (21)
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Legally being able to smoke, vote, and fuck does not make an 18 year old any less stupid. Trust me, I was 18 and in college once.
 
marrec said:
I don't know how it is in Germany but here in the US 18 year olds aren't Adults, they think they are but they're really just older teenagers who still have quite a bit of learning to do and a Professor should be ready to teach them.
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That is a silly point. If you want them to behave more like adults, treat them like adults. Shouting at them as if they are in year 7 doesn't help.

Besides if they were all buddies in class and this was more a playful thing, then it makes this whole thing even more harmless. Giving it to the prof was a dumb move though.
 
I don't understand what the person meant by it.
Or why you'd hand them out to an entire class.

Wtf? I don't understand why people are acting like this is a phrase either.
Explain gaf cause this just seems fucking weird.
 
I always saw it as just a joke. My friends and I found "no homo" ridiculously funny for some reason and yet I'm certain none of us are homophobic. But sure, probably wasn't the best place to use that term.
 
marrec said:
I don't know how it is in Germany but here in the US 18 year olds aren't Adults, they think they are but they're really just older teenagers who still have quite a bit of learning to do and a Professor should be ready to teach them.

I think it's great that Bish was able to turn that into a teaching moment about casual bigotry.
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It's a graduate class. Dude is probably 20+, any reasonable person wouldn't do that in a school environment.
 
BGBW said:
Well if it didn't have that label it could have just been seen as a nice gesture. Everyone deserves a bit of choccy.
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Right so the label isn't why they handed out the chocolate; they just stuck a stupid ignorant joke on top? Okay I get that. Still seems a weird amount of effort.

Oh well good Bish told them whats what. Next time they'll learn to give him one too :p
 
grimshawish said:
Right so the label isn't why they handed out the chocolate; they just stuck a stupid ignorant joke on top? Okay I get that. Still seems a weird amount of effort.

Oh well good Bish told them whats what. Next time they'll learn to give him one too :p
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They label probably was the point to try and come across as a hilarious guy.
 
marrec said:
Ya I forgot they were graduate students. Makes it even more ridiculous that this guy thought these candies were appropriate.
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Is just the disconnect of "This will be funny..." and reality.

There are people that can't differentiate the 2.

The candy as is would be a joke on a private setting and with familiar people. On a class setting is just poor judgement.
 
grimshawish said:
I don't understand what the person meant by it.
Or why you'd hand them out to an entire class.

Wtf? I don't understand why people are acting like this is a phrase either.
Explain gaf cause this just seems fucking weird.
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Guy wanted to hand out chocolates for valentine's, because he missed being able to do this as a kid and fuck yes everyone loves chocolates.
Guy realizes this might be a bit weird. Guy is a joker, so he comes up with a fool-proof plan so that everyone will think he's hilarious: write "no homo" on every individual chocolate! That way the girls won't realize he's hitting on them and the guys will all laugh with him, instead of making fun of him for acting gay. Because heart-shaped chocolates are a threat to his manhood.

Unfortunately for him, "no homo" has negative connotations, as in "ew no bro, I'm not gay, gross", and bish has a fucking brain, so he didn't get away with that thoughtless shit.
 
Lord-Audie said:
Is just the disconnect of "This will be funny..." and reality.

There are people that can't differentiate the 2.

The candy as is would be a joke on a private setting and with familiar people. On a class setting is just poor judgement.
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I would consider the dude a prick (maybe not a bigot) if he handed that candy to a single friend as a joking Valentines Day thing. Using the phrase "no homo" in any setting immediately calls into question your judgement.

The fact that he did this in so public a way makes him idiotic for sure.
 
Lord-Audie said:
Is just the disconnect of "This will be funny..." and reality.

There are people that can't differentiate the 2.

The candy as is would be a joke on a private setting and with familiar people. On a class setting is just poor judgement.
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Offering them to your classmates that you know and are friends with may be fine.

Offering one to your teacher, especially if you don't have a personal relationship with, is a rather dumb move.
 
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