Dating-Age |OT3| Positivity, Confidence, and Not Being a "Nice" Guy
- Thread starter soultron
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Shave it all off, like with a razor.
Max Payne style? I'm not sure I want to go that short. I don't think that would look good.
You don't know what looks good
I'm sure it looks great on a lot of people, I'm just saying I don't think it'd look good on me.
I think we've established you can't be trusted on how you look based on your previous comments on your appearance.
That would be pretty awesome. I'd need a nice suit and tie too.
You really think shaved would look good?
No idea.
no dont shave your head unless you're balding. please. get a buzz and let it grow and style it differently while it grows
He wants to take on an apprentice.
Devolution
Member
That dog is wearing a man cloak.
Devolution
Member
I'm drunk but Chinner's post reminded me of Buffalo Bill with the skin wearing comment.
I never learned to play the crumpet, i'm more skilled at the flute.
If you know what I mean.
shoudln't you be log4boyz then???
Devolution
Member
Just caught up, Izick: short. Also you're a decent looking dude as per most of dating-age honestly, I don't know why some of you get so caught up in being insecure about your looks.
Devolution
Member
The only thing holding dating-age back is generally not socializing enough with women and treating them like some exotic creature out on the savannah.
My parents named me.
I don't do that though, I mean I don't pursue them in a romantic way, but I can talk to women just as I can talk to guys. I've never had troubles talking to people like ever, which I do know a lot of people here have had issues with. It's just kind of the romantic side of things that I kind of get lost in.
They're still up though.
He's ashamed of looking like a human.
Devolution
Member
Such as?
I never feel like the girl is interested in something romantic. They like me as a friend and say that I'm funny, but I don't think they ever see me as anything beyond that.
Devolution
Member
Do you give them any reason to feel anything beyond that or even test their boundaries?
no matter what they think, i'm proud of you
I'm not sure how I'd give them a reason to feel anything beyond that, and I've tried to "flirt" with girls in the past, but it never comes off right I don't think.
I mean, in the past I've had a couple girls that have messaged me on Facebook or something and have told me that I was cute or something, but I wasn't really interested in either of them, so I turned them down as easily as possible. I tried to be like short, but not rude or anything and try to make it clear that I wasn't interested, but without being a dickhead. I usually get that impression from girls whenever I try to do something like that, although I'm never that straightforward. I can kind of just tell that there's no interest there.
Devolution
Member
Are you sure you can tell no interest is there? Or are you just assuming? A lot of girls/women still prefer men to make the first move or initiate a kind of overt message that the situation means more than just generic flirting that even friends do. In other words, since I'm drunk and not feeling in the mood to be too careful here, a lot of guys are fucking oblivious to how girls really feel and a lot of girls/women are very cryptic and ambiguous about this shit to protect their pride.
electricshake
Member
Izick, if you don't know what to do with your hair, why not go see a hairdresser? I mean a proper stylist, not just a barber. They'll know what sort of thing would suit your face shape etc. Yes, it will cost a bit more but if you get something that suits you it'll be totally worth it. And if you don't like it, well hair grows back
Well, I like the bluntness actually.
From the posts that people keep saying, that is that I look fine, or good, or whatever, then I'm starting to think that could be the problem I guess. It's kind of the only thing left to really guess. If I'm not ugly, I'm a funny and nice person, I don't dress like a loon, and I have good hygiene and whatnot, I'm guessing that I must have missed something.
Maybe I should have taken more initiative, but I always hated whenever I'd try and create a conversation when texting and then I'd get a couple word replies, usually ones with "lols" or "haha" as one of the words. It's just kind of frustrating, and I immediately feel like she's not interested.
Izick, if you don't know what to do with your hair, why not go see a hairdresser? I mean a proper stylist, not just a barber. They'll know what sort of thing would suit your face shape etc. Yes, it will cost a bit more but if you get something that suits you it'll be totally worth it. And if you don't like it, well hair grows back
That's not a bad idea, but I've kind of always liked my hair short, to be honest. I can like style it one way or another if it grows out a bit, I was just curious if people thought I looked clearly better one way or the other. Still good suggestion though.
They're probably thinking about how the hell to escape...wait I've said too much.
Don't try to do that. Texts mean nothing and should only be used to give some a short info like "Will be 5 min late" or as a question that you don't need immediately answered like "When are you out of work today?".
You need to hold a conversation IN PERSON. That's where you can show your personality, your knowledge and that you can entertain your partner. Trying to use texts to talk robs you of all that and actually makes you look bad in some ways.
Always go face to face if you can, MAYBE make an actual phone call.
And I finally saw your pics, you're definitely not ugly. I think you looked better with short hair, that long hair in one of the pics makes you look like a greasy, sweaty nerd, but that's my opinion. Definitely try what someone said above and check a hair stylist, they'll give you some good tips.
Apart from that, if someone from now on tells you you are ugly, just tell them you were at least handsome enough to get with their mom.
The only major difference between a guy and a girl is the fact I have a dangly part and you don't. Why should a guy put a girl on a pedestal or whatever? Just treat them like a human being.
Vermillion
Banned
Not exactly. Thank you society :|
But no you shouldn't put the opposite sex above yourself.
I'd try and refrain from texting as much as possible. I know it's sometimes unavoidable but girls can get really flaky and annoying when texting. Just yesterday I called up a girl and got a date that very night in 2 minutes of talking. That would've taken multiple text's to achieve when texting and people misinterpret or overthink text's a lot too which is dangerous.
Small update on my front. I managed to get a date with her yesterday night and we watched a fun movie. Did the classic moves like ask her to come sit next to me halfway during the movie and we had some good talks. When she nearly wanted to go home it started raining real hard so we laid in bed snuggling a little while. When she finally did leave we kissed for a couple of minutes so I'm on the top of the world right now
. Only problem I have is I feel like I have to initiate most of it, when we were snuggling I had to jump in next to her and although she did scoot on a little closer a couple of times when we were spooning she never really gave me any signs to escalate so we pretty much just laid there for half an hour. I just couldn't tell if she just wanted to lay there and relax or if she wanted me to be a manly man and flip her around and kiss her. Does any girl or guy know how to interpret situations like that? I can provide some more details if necessary.
Haven't confronted her about the dudes I'm suspecting she's seeing either since everything was going well and she's going on vacation for a week anyway so I'll have to save that awkward talk for another time.
Yep. I've met people who are notoriously bad texters or IMers to the point where I thought they were not interested in me, but then in person we are fine. Never use texting to have real conversations.
Izick, I gave you a lot of crap before but it sounds like you are listening now. You look better with short hair. Also Devolution is correct. Guys are notoriously bad at picking up signs. It's easy for us to see the signs when it's directed to someone else, but when it's to us? We are oblivious.
As for the facebook girl you mentioned, it MAY be too late. With anything in life, timing is everything. She gave you an opening. You could have asked her out, or you could hang out with her and go from there. But if you wait too long, she may look else where or assume you're not interested. The point is, it requires action on your end.
Many of us are not blessed with girls throwing themselves on us. It just does not happen. We have to take the initiative. Also, If you're expecting some big sign of interest from them before asking them out you will be looking for a long time.
Etrian Oddity
Member
As I said before, it is your attitude. aka, u r a pussy (jk... nt rly)
You need to improve your social skills...those are what are holding you back. Be happy that's all you have to worry about, because that is easily remedied by going out and practicing your people interaction. Flirt more, go out and be at ease, etc.
Really, it's all about the conviction to improve yourself. I'm not going to name names, but the past like, 20 pages of this thread have had a very similar theme with different posters, and it truly does fall to motivation to continue improving yourself.
Be happy you only have your attitude to fix. I not only have to worry about my social inadequacies, but I also have to fight my weight, which has been nearly a decade-long battle. Girls care a shit-ton more about a guy's weight than his personality; so long as you meet a minimum physical standard they'll be attracted to you.
I can (and have) sit in this thread and complain about the fact that my laid-back attitude is mistaken for asexuality by girls because I'm a little chubby, or I can focus on my diet and workouts. I can complain that I don't flirt or dance with girls often, or I can go put myself out there and make it happen.
It just falls to the decisions you make, Izick.
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