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Hey guys:

Some of you may be aware of the impending rule change. There are going to be several changes to what we kind of topics we can create and what we can say in our posts. With that said, if you want to keep this thread from getting deleted, please refrain from any discussion involving sex, or any sexual activity. Keep things relatively clean from now on, or, until we have a better understanding of the new rules. Thanks

Yeah, I know...It's stupid. REALLY stupid, online censorship that is. But hey, not my rules, not the mods', not even Evilore's. Blame Google AdSense :/

More info here:

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=437114

Girls. You can't escape them yet we understand so little. What can we hope to achieve without the help of others? GAF being the kind community it is, is willing to help you out with understanding the opposite sex (if you're a dude). Don't know if a girl is into you? Want to know how to meet others? Share your issues, advice and learn from others. That way we can hope to one day better understand the female half of our species.

Finding a girl is tough work. There's a lot you need to know and a lot you need to do. Read on and things should be made a little bit easier.

Preparation

• In order to get yourself in a position where dating is fun and rewarding instead of awkward and frustrating you first need to internalize some things. The first is that girls are human beings too, and this sounds terribly cliche but it's true: ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT A GIRL IS AS, IF NOT MORE, NERVOUS THAN YOU WHEN YOU APPROACH HER
• Confidence is key. Focus on what you do well, not what you don't do well
• Buy some new clothes. Especially if you don't have a great dress sense. Take your best dressed girl/gay friend to the store and let them dress you up
• Get some nice shoes and socks
• Get a hobby if you don't have one. Photography, music, film making, dog training, kite flying, sailing, fishing or anything else. You need to appear interesting and it can give a good starting point for conversations
• If you have the body of a 9 year old, work out and put on weight. It'll make you much more attractive (although this isn't always an issue. Unless if you're horribly anorexic)
• Get a haircut
• If overweight, lose weight
• If skinny, gain weight
• Sleep

How To Improve

• This ability doesn't come as naturally as some of us might want. Some get it faster than others, some never do
• As long as you keep making progress, it's all good
• The cool thing about learning the in and outs of dating is that you never ever take a look back. You WILL fail, repeatedly even, but you will get it right if you pay heed to the correct advice and work for it
• You might feel that you haven't even advanced much, but one day you will wake up and think "jeez I kind of want to go with Jeena but Samm is really bugging me to go out with her today"
• Many girls wanting to be with you, is the sign that you are something else

Where To Go

• Honestly, anywhere. If you specifically want to concentrate on meeting women, a bar/club or a dating club would be fine
• Normal places like coffee shops, bookstores, class, shopping at the mall, etc. can work very well too
• If you see someone you're interested in, just go up to them and start a conversation
• Many people go to bars and clubs to pick up girls. Until you are comfortable with approaching strangers in bars, going out with the sole purpose of meeting girls is only going to leave you frustrated and angry. Go to bars to have fun instead. Do your damn hardest to have THE MOST FUN you can have at a bar. Fun is contagious and people notice it. If you are having A BLAST at the bar, and you go to the bathroom, it's going to be a hell of a lot easier to say hi to that random girl that keeps looking in your direction
• Coffee shops, bookstores and libraries and the mall. Common interests is a must to being able to catch the attention of a girl in this environment. "Oh are you reading x?", "buying z?", "drinking y?". They will say yes, IT IS NOW IMPERATIVE THAT YOU ASK WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT IT. If you don't ask, now you are going to be left with nothing to keep the conversation, but asking for her opinion, will fill you in with details with which you can have a conversation
• In a class, just say something like "hi! never seen you before? What classes are you taking?". Anything simple. Try to think of a starter when you're there, depending on the situation

How To Act & What To Do

• Confidence is key. If you get all nervous and fumble about when talking with a girl it won't go down too well. She may find it cute it but you shouldn't rest on that
• Be relaxed. Don't be all over the place
• Be nice. If you're dropping f bombs and arguing with everyone in the vicinity it won't look good. Especially if you want a long lasting relationship. You want to give off a good impression
• Be funny. Making a girl laugh is the way forward
• Don't act like someone you're not. It'll usually backfire and end up making you look silly
• Be happy. You need to smile and show that you're having a good time. If you look angry or unhappy it'll never go well
• Ask her about her life. Be interested in what she says
• Be a gentleman and treat them like a lady but that doesn't mean be a pushover

What NOT To Do

• Don't put her on a pedestal. If you make her out to be a goddess chances are she'll start acting like one
• Don't be creepy. Staring at a girl puts you into creepy territory
• Don't stare at her boobs while talking to her
• Don't be perverted. Rude jokes rarely go down well and neither does dirty talk. Save it for when you're closer
• Girls aren't like your best guy friend. Don't treat them and talk to them in the same way unless if you want to alienate them
• Don't be rude. Cussing all the time will just alienate her and it'll make you seem like someone who isn't ready for a relationship. Don't insult anyone, be racist or sexist
• Don't be a ridiculous gentleman. Free meals, buying her flowers, writing her songs and opening her doors for 10 minutes while she arrives is something you wait to do (maybe not all of the listed) when you're in a proper relationship. Don't do all of that before then

Knowing if She's Right (Long Lasting Relationships)

• You usually can't tell from the offset. Go out with her, talk with her and eventually you will come to know if she's 'the one'
• If you enjoy being with her, that's a good sign
• If she makes you happy, that too is a good sign
• Read the 'red lights' list below and consider the opposite (sensibly)
• Can you imagine living with her forever? If yes, that's good news

Signs She's Interested

• Make note of her body language. If she's touching her hair while you are chatting her up it shows a sign of subconscious interest. The same if she maintains eye contact, laughs, points her knees to the side, touches you or leans towards you
• If she gets close to you then it means you don't disgust her which is a good start. Don't take this as evidence alone though. Being close doesn't always mean she's interested
• She asks you out on a date
• She accepts your jokes, tells you about herself, validates herself to you ("I am a musician" "Oh really? I love music, I used to play piano as a child") and she makes plans for the future
• She gives you her number
• Sometimes you just have to ask her out. Take the plunge and it might pay off. You have nothing to lose

Keeping Things Going

• Always be looking for small ways to engage in light physical intimacy. For example, touching her arm while laughing at her joke

Online Dating

• Never use online dating as your primary source of dating. Use it as a supplement to meeting girls in person
• Always make sure the girl has a full-body pic in her profile. The "angle" shot isn't an Internet urban myth. There's nothing more awkward then seeing a girl for the first time and realizing that she's morbidly obese when you thought she was a size 0
• 'Curvy' usually means obese
• The different dating sites appeal to different demographics. Match.com is a general dating site with the most traffic, but also the most competition. It's the easiest site to find girls willing to go out on a date. OKCupid tends to have more of the nerdy and hipster girls, and also more "alternative" girls. But a lot of girls sign up for the site just to take their quizzes and thus may not be as receptive to dating. eHarmony tends to get lots of people looking to settle down right away, and attracts more religious girls. It's also the priciest, and you have to rely on the site's matching algorithm to find you matches (instead of generally searching by area or common interest like on the other sites). Plus, you have to go through a multi-step process to communicate with your matches, where you answer brief questions about yourself. Plentyoffish... Never tried POF myself, but I know people who have had success
• Communicate with as many girls as you can juggle, at first. The girls you are seeking are probably going out with a ton of people as they are dating you, and then they decide on what one they like best
• Your first email to the girl should NOT be a robotic/generic message. Tailor it exclusively to the girl. Mention one or two things about her profile, or about her pictures. If she has a pic of herself in front of the Leaning Tower of Pisa, ask her what she thought of Italy. If her music taste meshes with yours, ask her if she's been to any cool concerts recently
• Many girls on dating sites are on it for a confidence-boost. Guys vastly outnumber girls on the sites, and feel the need to shower the ones there with attention. An average-looking girl who wouldn't get a second look at a meat-market bar, suddenly becomes belle of the ball when online. NEVER praise a girl's looks online (of course, you can and should mention something unique about her pictures, like if she's wearing a cool shirt)
• Girls can be incredibly flaky compared to girls you meet in real life. Don't take it personally if things seem solid at first but then she poofs for seemingly no reason. You probably didn't do anything wrong, it's her. As said before, this'll be different depending on the site you're on. OKCupid you'll see this a lot. eHarmony and PoF, not so much as they're only for dating and not social networking
• eHarmony is... odd. They have a weird matchmaking system (to some at least)
• Email etiquette: Don't get into email-limbo with a girl. After 2 or 3 back-and-forths, it's time to ask for the cell phone # and a date. Don't respond immediately to an email (give it a 1 or 2 day buffer), but at the same time, don't leave them hanging for a week or so. When she gives you the cell phone #, call her and set up a time/place
• Match.com: Be aware that there is no way to tell who is a paid or non paid user. This means you can send out a message to somebody and they won't be able to respond unless they pay the subscription fee. This may have changed but be wary

What To Do on a (First) Date

• Make her laugh
• Throw in a compliment or two. Don't overdo it though
• Talk and try to act as confident as possible. Don't be arrogant though
• Dress well
• Touch her but not overly. Leave the groping for later. Just light touches on her shoulder etc.

What NOT To Do on a (First) Date

• Act rude. Don't fart
• Be rude. Don't tell her she's ugly or fat
• Ask her to pay (if it's a restaurant etc.)
• Talk only about yourself
• Tell her about how you think another girl is hot and how you want her
• Discussing politics and/or religion is a big no no. Opens the gates to failure and awkwardness. Wait it out before going into deep conversations
• Don't be late
• Don't act lazy/not energetic
• Don't be apologetic about anything. If you mess up or drop something, sure, but otherwise don't
• Don't do movie and a dinner. It's just boring. Especially a movie. You need to be able to talk, not sit in silence for two hours (first date)
• Don't do expensive places. It's just not worth it for any first date (first date)
• Don't do something you can't easily escape from. It she is boring, you need to have an easy escape plan (first date)
• Don't do family. It's scary and you shouldn't be moving that fast. At all (first date)
• Don't do BUDDIES DRINK NIGHT OUT. It might work, but it's more fun and memorable to go kite flying (for example - first date)

Bad Signs on a First Date

• She's late
• She doesn't show up
• She eats like a pig (restaurant etc.)
• She only talks about herself
• She is loud and obnoxious
• She talks about past boyfriends or any other negative topic

What NOT To Do (Straight After The First Date)

• Don't pay for everything
• Don't buy her gifts to prove your interest in her
• Don't fuck her friend
• Don't tell her you love her/really really like her/feel strongly about her/have never felt this way before! Give it some time. Moving too fast is a big no no
• Don't let her suck your dirty dick. Shower you nasty bastard
• Don't second guess yourself
• Don't ask her for "permission" to do things, she is not your mother
• Don't apologize every 5 seconds for everything you say or do
• If she ignores you, don't send her 80 messages asking where she is. She is either dead, fucking someone else, or has her phone turned off for a good reason. None of those situations will be helped by you leaving a voice mail every 5 minutes
• Remember that every guy she knows probably wants to sleep with her. You're ability to put a penis inside of her is not your selling point. She can get that anywhere
• Don't be boring

So now you have the girl. The easy part's over. You now need to know how to keep the relationship going (if you want a long lasting one) and you need to know when to end it if necessary. Keep going. Maybe after all this you'll better understand girls. Maybe.

Things That Should Trigger Red Lights

• She's going into a relationship even though she still isn't over a previous breakup. This can be a cause of many problems, especially if she hasn't fully recovered from the breakup
• She's trying to move things along too quickly
• She only has guy friends. Not only can they be possible competitors but it would also be strange that she has no girl friends. Something might be amiss
• She talks about previous boyfriends to you (more than once)
• She talks to previous boyfriends (a lot)
• She is acts depressive. Plenty to choose from. Don't get stuck with someone who's depressive as they'll end up just depressing you too
• She acts crazy. Same reason as above
• She acts spoilt. You don't want someone who acts like a child. Relationships require maturity and being spoilt will create many problems especially with finance
• She acts and expects to be treated like a 'princess'. See above. Same thing about maturity and living in the real world
• She always wants to be with you and gets upset when you can't see her. You don't want someone clingy. You NEED free time. As much as you love someone, you can't be with them all the time. It's very unhealthy
• She's always calling you and is upset and angry when you don't answer once
• She's obsessed with you
• She wants constant attention. Same with the above few reasons
• She can't take a joke. You want someone you can have fun with and enjoy your time with. Not someone who'll get angry for you cracking a simple joke
• She acts like she's the hottest girl in town
• She hates your friends
• She hates your family. You might dismiss this but it can be a huge cause of issues
• She's insecure (always saying she's ugly). You don't want someone arrogant but you also don't want someone who is convinced they're the ugliest girl around
• She argues with you in public
• She doesn't trust you. You've probably heard this many times before, but relationships are built on trust. If she doesn't trust you, it'll never end well. Ever. End it now
• She always complains
• She thinks/speaks negatively about her friends/family
• She's violent
• She's delusional. If she starts seeing ridiculous things in small events such as a girl saying happy birthday to you and she thinks you're cheating
• She's always jealous/makes paranoid assumptions. If she gets annoyed when you smile at another girl that's not a good sign.
• She's emotionally unstable. Crying all the time about small things and not getting what she wants
• She's a compulsive liar
• She's a stripper
• She's willing to travel across the world and live with you after meeting her online and without seeing each other in person first. Ask yourself why. It probably means she has a fundamental flaw and is jumping at the opportunity

How to Know When It's Time to End It

• You don't enjoy being around her
• You don't feel comfortable around her
• You don't feel happy around her
• You can't imagine living with her
• Refer to above list
• The only reason you can think of for why you are still together is you love her. This isn't a chick flick, love is not all you need.
• Your families are totally against each other and hate each other
• There's no trust
• You argue more times than you joke and have a happy time
• You're upset with her more than you are happy
• She puts you down constantly. You get into a relationship to be happy

How To End It

• Clean, simple, fast. That's how it has to be. Once you know it has to end, end it. With as little nonsense as possible. This will minimize hurt to both parties
• Accept that 99% of the time you are no longer going to be friends. Worrying about what she is going to think about you is a waste of time
• If you have to be a jerk to get it done, so be it. Better that than 3 days and nights of crying and pouting and accusations and arguments
• If it looks like this is heading towards a long drawn out event, get out of there by any means necessary

After The Break Up

• If it's a bad/serious break up, erase her from phone, email, Facebook and life
• You may cherish your memories with her someday, but right now all they are doing is holding you down
• Surround yourself with friends/family
• Keep occupied. Get on with your life as usual. Do your work, carry on with any hobbies and go out with friends/family
• Get a haircut, buy some new clothes, take a trip and make some new memories
• Don't think about finding someone new, think about yourself for a while. Relationships can wait
• If you happen to see her again or she starts talking to you, STAY AWAY. Especially if it was a bad breakup. Getting back with someone hardly ever works out in the long run. Pretend you don't know her and move on

General Advice/Comments

• Never sleep with a woman with more problems than you because her problems will become yours
• Don't be shy in giving compliments. Don't go overboard but the odd compliment always helps
• Don't be an asshole if you want a long lasting relationship
• When in doubt, bail out. There are plenty of women out there. Don't stick with one who isn't worth your time. A relationship is meant to be a source of happiness
• Don't cheat. If you're in a monogamous relationship don't go around sleeping with other people. If you want to do that, either end it or make sure the other person is aware that you're having an open relationship. Cheating causes a many many problems and is a cruel thing to do
• Don't get into a relationship if you're depressed or if you generally don't think you'll be able to do it well. It'll just end badly
• A great first date is the "activity date". Bowling, mini golf, going to Dave and Busters, shooting pool... far beats coffee. If you and the girl don't have a lot to talk about, at least you will have SOME fun playing games or shooting pool. Plus, it gives great opportunities to tease ("come on, can't believe you missed THAT shot!" after she messes up on a 7-10 split), and make light physical contact (slap her five if she gets a strike)
• Don't listen to anecdotes. Things like "My aunt broke up with her husband for a year before they got back together again and ended up getting married" or "My buddy was in a long term relationship and he ended up getting married to the girl!" or even "I'm still great friends with my ex!" should be ignored. If 1000 people jump off a building and 4 people live, that doesn't make jumping off said building a smart thing to do. Odds are still 99% you ending up with your brains smashed all over the sidewalk. If it was the most likely outcome, it wouldn't need anecdotal evidence to "prove it". Be sensible

Getting A Girl in 6 Steps

1. Talk to her. Be confident and happy. Make her laugh
2. Ask her for her number. If she gives it to you, move on to the next step. If not, go back to the first one and try with a different girl
3. Call her up (DON'T TEXT) and tell her when to meet you for a date (i.e. 'Wanna go out for lunch tomorrow at XXX place?')
4. Be smiley and happy. Make her laugh some more and get close. Don't get too touchy feely though. It depends on your aim. If it's to get laid, more touching is fine. If your sole aim is going to bed with her, this is the final step for you. No need for second dates or anything of the sort. Just return back to step 1. If it's for a long lasting relationship, limit touching to a minimum. Remember this is just the first date
5. If the first date went well, call her up and ask her out again. Not too soon after (still talk to her every now and then). If she declines, start from the top of the list with a different girl
6. You should be getting a bit closer now. Keep repeating steps 3-5. Ask her out and keep seeing how things progress. If all is well, you're in
7. Follow the rest of the information in this thread

*Note* All of the advice in this thread is written by members. Use it as you wish but remember to be sensible and use your own judgment too.

Old thread

Special thanks to Enco for compiling the info and making the banners. Also, a big thanks to BronzeWolf, siddx and jon bones who helped out a lot with the content. And of course, thank you GAF for posting so much useful advice.

 

[ShOcKwAvE]

Went out with a group of people on Friday and I really hit it off with one of the girls. We exchanged numbers and she even made me call her to make sure it worked.

I called her around 8pm the next night, but got her voicemail and left a brief message. "Hey -----, it's -----. Just calling to say hi...give me a call when you get this, bye." Nice and simple, right?

Well, haven't heard back yet. No text, no calls. This girl was extremely nice, so I can't comprehend why she would just not respond at all.

I'm thinking of giving it one last try, either tonight or tomorrow. Thoughts?

 

[Link1110]

I finally decided how to go about this on Friday. I'm going to use her friend's question as a jumping off point yo see if were going out.

If not, I met a cute girl at school, so I have a new target. Just hate having to start over when I've known this one gor six months.

 

[jon bones]

topic suggestions for OP (you probably should have reserved an extra post or two but it's all good):

-why you should stop being so nice

-the crucial nature of confidence

-how to open (lots of people here go "too serious" at first as opposed to a more light-hearted and more accessible intro)

-when to close (much, much sooner than you think)

 

[Lionheart1827]

So 2 years outta the dating scene I've been seeing this girl a few times in the past couple of weeks. Extremely nice and caring(so far). We always seem to end up playing off each others humor and quirks. We went out last weekend and we ended up at one of the local diners and we ended up talking for 2 and a half hours. Time just flew by. Not really asking for any advice, just wanted to share my experiences back on the scene.

Feels good man.

 

[Rocket Scientist]

Never leave a voicemail/message. Period. By saying something like ''give me a call when you get this, bye.'', you're putting the ball in her court. You don't want that, because it gives you less control over whatever happens next. See: now you're thinking about why she hasn't contacted you and you're probably feeling hesitant to call again or whatever. Like it or not, the guy is supposed to chase the girl. She probably won't call you on her own after only one (I assume you just met?) meeting. Either way, there is no reason not to try again! Definitely do call again to set up something. Don't mention the message or ask why she hasn't called though. If she brings it up, fine, if she doesn't, no reason for you bring it up. You were too busy living your awesome life to be phased by something simple as that

 

[industrian]

Right now in all probability I've got a girlfriend in Taiwan. I took my sweet ass time, sue me.

Why was Combine banned?

 

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

I'm thinking of giving it one last try, either tonight or tomorrow. Thoughts?

Nope. She got your message. If you don't trust voicemail, why would you use it? It's her turn now. If she never plays it, she never does and that's that.

 

[siddx]

Went out with a group of people on Friday and I really hit it off with one of the girls. We exchanged numbers and she even made me call her to make sure it worked.

I called her around 8pm the next night, but got her voicemail and left a brief message. "Hey -----, it's -----. Just calling to say hi...give me a call when you get this, bye." Nice and simple, right?

Well, haven't heard back yet. No text, no calls. This girl was extremely nice, so I can't comprehend why she would just not respond at all.

I'm thinking of giving it one last try, either tonight or tomorrow. Thoughts?

Do not call her again. You already left her a message.
Your message was terrible btw. "Give me a call when you get this" makes it sound like you are sitting around waiting to hear from her and she needs to get cracking and call you up before you track her down and make a bag out of her face.
But here is a hint. If she's into you, she'll call you back, no matter how dorky or awkward your message was. If she isn't, she's going to ignore you. And she decided whether or not to call you back or answer your call the night she met you. Probably within a few minutes of meeting you.


edit: PXG's achievement list makes me feel like a whore. There is only one thing I haven't gotten yet.

 

[jon bones]

I'm thinking of giving it one last try, either tonight or tomorrow. Thoughts?

don't. you called her and left a message - ball's in her court. next time call with a purpose, not to say hi. you're going to be at something awesome and if she's free, she should meet you there. if not it's whatever because you're going to doing awesome things anyway.

I finally decided how to go about this on Friday. I'm going to use her friend's question as a jumping off point yo see if were going out.

If not, I met a cute girl at school, so I have a new target. Just hate having to start over when I've known this one gor six months.

1) just go for it - why wait six months to close?

2) a new target? you're still in school - there's hundreds of available women for you to meet. diversify your bonds.

 

[Lionheart1827]

Right now in all probability I've got a girlfriend in Taiwan. I took my sweet ass time, sue me.

Why was Combine banned?

Evilore gave him a year ban to get his life together.

 

[Mistouze]

-why you should stop being so nice

I hope this isnt a "be an ass on purpose" advice and more of a "don't be nicer than you are usually, be yourself". Most of the times, playfully making jokes on your date can go a long way

 

[shuri]

Woah, the achievement list thing has to be the geekiest most awkward thing ever. I hope that there isnt gaffers comparing scores in that thread

 

[industrian]

Evilore gave him a year ban to get his life together.

Sounds like the best reason to ban a person you can get. Especially in Combine's case. I don't think it'll work though as Combine has a persecution complex combined (no pun intended) with social anxiety similar to what I used to have. I was able to break free of that shit by losing a ton of weight and feeling good about myself for once in my life. Shit, that was five years ago now. How time flies.

Hopefully the motherfucker will prove me wrong though.

 

[siddx]

I hope this isnt a "be an ass on purpose" advice and more of a "don't be nicer than you are usually, be yourself". Most of the times, playfully making jokes on your date can go a long way

The be nice/be an ass topic could fill it's own thread. The biggest problem with the "be a dick" or "don't be so nice" advice is people approach it from too simple a standpoint. It isn't strictly "act like a douchebag and get laid". It's "have the confidence to be kind of a cocky prick and girls will pick up on that confidence". Too many guys do the cocky thing without the confidence to back it up and it's painfully obvious to everyone in the room when that is the case.

But then you have a different set of women who thrive on being treated like shit, ignored, belittled. And just being a dick in general no matter what will get you attention from them.

And then there is the 'break them down and build them' up method where you take away all their confidence and self worth and build it back up yourself so that every positive thing she feels about herself is due to you and your compliments. It's a supremely douchey way to treat anyone but if you ever wanted complete adoration and a woman who will do anything for you....

 

[Askia47]

On the list I've only done one thing, and that was 4 years ago.

Numbers game (5pt/bronze) - get a girl's number

 

[jon bones]

why did you post that with no other information? did you want advice or did you want to spread your sadness around?

The be nice/be an ass topic could fill it's own thread. The biggest problem with the "be a dick" or "don't be so nice" advice is people approach it from too simple a standpoint. It isn't strictly "act like a douchebag and get laid". It's "have the confidence to be kind of a cocky prick and girls will pick up on that confidence". Too many guys do the cocky thing without the confidence to back it up and it's painfully obvious to everyone in the room when that is the case.

well put but sometimes the "fake it till you make it" method works. in terms of confidence, that is, NOT just being a douche in general. the asshole factor stems from narcissism, brashness, boldness (all of which leads to an increase in your perceived self worth) - not from being overtly mean or bitter or anything like that.

 

[Mistouze]

But then you have a different set of women who thrive on being treated like shit, ignored, belittled. And just being a dick in general no matter what will get you attention from them.

Seen a few, always prompted me to BAIL THE FUCK OUT :lol

And then there is the 'break them down and build them' up method where you take away all their confidence and self worth and build it back up yourself so that every positive thing she feels about herself is due to you and your compliments. It's a supremely douchey way to treat anyone but if you ever wanted complete adoration and a woman who will do anything for you....

I know it takes two to tango but damn it takes a couple of weird persons to get into that kind of shit... And its not like you can't ever experiment sexually with someone you put on the same leve as you

 

[ShOcKwAvE]

Do not call her again. You already left her a message.
Your message was terrible btw. "Give me a call when you get this" makes it sound like you are sitting around waiting to hear from her and she needs to get cracking and call you up before you track her down and make a bag out of her face.
But here is a hint. If she's into you, she'll call you back, no matter how dorky or awkward your message was. If she isn't, she's going to ignore you. And she decided whether or not to call you back or answer your call the night she met you. Probably within a few minutes of meeting you.

I'll agree with the majority of responses against calling her back, so I appreciate that. What bothers me is the idea you have that my voicemail was terrible. "Give me a call when you get this" is a pretty common utterance for a voicemail, and most girls won't read into it like you just did.

I think the fact that I waited 24hrs, left one short and simple voicemail, didn't text, didn't friend on Facebook, are all positive actions that outweigh any minor flaw in the voicemail itself.

 

[infiniteloop]

Woah, the achievement list thing has to be the geekiest most awkward thing ever. I hope that there isnt gaffers comparing scores in that thread

yeah, it was an embarrassing read :lol

 

[SephCast]

Not sure if I like the thread title...

 

[siddx]

why did you post that with no other information? did you want advice or did you want to spread your sadness around?



well put but sometimes the "fake it till you make it" method works. in terms of confidence, that is, NOT just being a douche in general. the asshole factor stems from narcissism, brashness, boldness (all of which leads to an increase in your perceived self worth) - not from being overtly mean or bitter or anything like that.

True, and my problem is my asshole factor shifts it's source from "bitter and mean" to "brash and bold" and back again every quite frequently.

Brash and Bold = I will take her home and sex will occur and I will appreciate that I was born with moderately good looks and an interesting background that allows someone like me to have more sex than I deserve. I will be funny and witty and piss someone off, likely the guy who wanted to fuck the girl I am talking to. I will teeter on the edge of being an outright jerk but always pull back in time.

Bitter and Mean = I will make her feel small and broken inside because I am horny enough to sleep with her but not enough to put in any real effort because I don't want to have awkward post sex conversation in which I encourage her to leave so I can have the bed to myself. I will be just as happy to go home and jerk off into a t shirt while looking at nude videos of my exes and wondering how upset their parents would be if I emailed the videos to them.

 

[jon bones]

I'll agree with the majority of responses against calling her back, so I appreciate that. What bothers me is the idea you have that my voicemail was terrible. "Give me a call when you get this" is a pretty common utterance for a voicemail, and most girls won't read into it like you just did.

I think the fact that I waited 24hrs, left one short and simple voicemail, didn't text, didn't friend on Facebook, are all positive actions that outweigh any minor flaw in the voicemail itself.

your vm wasn't terrible, it was just a bit... pointless. you're a busy guy, you're not trying to chat on the phone ("just saying hi") after hanging out once in a group setting. you just want to set up something interesting soon.

Not sure if I like the thread title...

i'm sure i don't like it. this is much bigger than shouting out two posters

 

[-PXG-]

Can a mod change it to:

Girl/Dating Age Part 2: A combined effort to give advice for those in need

thanks

 

[SephCast]

What do you have in mind?

Definitely a shout out to Combine, the original threadmaker, but a little less comical, maybe?

In the other thread, someone suggested "Girl/Dating Age Part 2: A Combined Effort"

A little plain, but something along those lines would be cool.

 

[norinrad]

Changed it.

I'm okay with part 2 but you should add something like Confidence rising or how to approach women and take it to the next level.

:lol

 

[siddx]

I'll agree with the majority of responses against calling her back, so I appreciate that. What bothers me is the idea you have that my voicemail was terrible. "Give me a call when you get this" is a pretty common utterance for a voicemail, and most girls won't read into it like you just did.

I think the fact that I waited 24hrs, left one short and simple voicemail, didn't text, didn't friend on Facebook, are all positive actions that outweigh any minor flaw in the voicemail itself.

I guess terrible isn't the right word. But the phrase itself is bad because it's telling her what to do. Demanding that she call you when she gets your message. People don't like to me told what to do. Even if it's something they WANT to do. If someone told me to go jerk off right now I would tell them to eat shit. Even if it was something I wanted to do.
It also tells her she has the power now. She knows you want her to call, and she doesn't have to do shit if she doesn't want.

Again, not terrible. It's not like you left a message in a low throaty growl telling her you are going to cut a hole in her face and fuck it till chtulu rises from her asshole.

 

[ShOcKwAvE]

your vm wasn't terrible, it was just a bit... pointless. you're a busy guy, you're not trying to chat on the phone ("just saying hi") after hanging out once in a group setting. you just want to set up something interesting soon.

The "hi" part was not literal...obviously if she answered, we'd have a decent convo as I built to setting up a meet in the near future. Point taken though.

 

[vitaminwateryum]

Asked that girl out after class. Straight up Daniel-san'd. Knowing that she's already dating somebody would have probably helped too...

Woah, the achievement list thing has to be the geekiest most awkward thing ever. I hope that there isnt gaffers comparing scores in that thread

Glad I'm not the only only one who found that pretty weird :lol

 

[CzarTim]

why we still got womanz?

 

[Scarecrow]

going to a book store with a girl later today. This'll be my 4th(?) date with her. Going to ask her if she wants to come over to my place later in the week to watch the finale of Sons of Anarchy.

I'm trying to get over the awkwardness I'm imagining in my head.

 

[Askia47]

why did you post that with no other information? did you want advice or did you want to spread your sadness around?



well put but sometimes the "fake it till you make it" method works. in terms of confidence, that is, NOT just being a douche in general. the asshole factor stems from narcissism, brashness, boldness (all of which leads to an increase in your perceived self worth) - not from being overtly mean or bitter or anything like that.

Looking at the list of achievements seems really daunting but at the same time a lot of it represents what I want to do eventually. However after so many years of really not “getting it”, I feel mixed on the whole situation. On the one hand I would like to be able to pursue different relationships. However at the same time I feel as though it might be a waste of time. While relationships seemed like a great experience to take advantage of back in high school, I was shot down badly, and I became pretty jaded at the prospect of any other possibilities arising. Throughout most of college I only focused on me and only watched how others handled relationships. In some ways it seems like a waste of time because I’ve seen many other relationships crash and burn, and it doesn’t look enjoyable at all. The romantic allure of relationships is lost, but I still want one. It’s all confusing, and then I have to be assertive and pursue others is something I’m not used to as I’m more relaxed and laid back. I’m not sure what I should do, I mostly think about living alone and just not being bothered, which is just a repeat of all the years until now. That doesn’t make me happy, but it is what I’m used to.

 

[dskillzhtown]

I hope this isnt a "be an ass on purpose" advice and more of a "don't be nicer than you are usually, be yourself". Most of the times, playfully making jokes on your date can go a long way

Nah, it is a "don't be so unrealistically nice that she will get bored or not appreciate your niceness" hint. Be yourself. Stop trying to impress. Not saying be an ass, but just be who you are, do what you do.

I used to be that guy. So nice, buying everything, taking girls out to magnificent dinners for a first date, etc. But I then realized that the girls (and myself to a degree) focused on the dinners, movie premiers, games, etc. than getting to know each other. It is much better to just be yourself, meet up for coffee/drinks, running errands together, something to get to know her better. A dinner or event is much better when you actually care about the person you are going with, and not some stranger who you barely know. Heck, my fiance and I went to IKEA looking for a couch on our first "date".

 

[CzarTim]

Looking at the list of achievements seems really daunting but at the same time a lot of it represents what I want to do eventually. However after so many years of really not “getting it”, I feel mixed on the whole situation. On the one hand I would like to be able to pursue different relationships. However at the same time I feel as though it might be a waste of time. While relationships seemed like a great experience to take advantage of back in high school, I was shot down badly, and I became pretty jaded at the prospect of any other possibilities arising. Throughout most of college I only focused on me and only watched how others handled relationships. In some ways it seems like a waste of time because I’ve seen many other relationships crash and burn, and it doesn’t look enjoyable at all. The romantic allure of relationships is lost, but I still want one. It’s all confusing, and then I have to be assertive and pursue others is something I’m not used to as I’m more relaxed and laid back. I’m not sure what I should do, I mostly think about living alone and just not being bothered, which is just a repeat of all the years until now. That doesn’t make me happy, but it is what I’m used to.

Once you meet the right girl for you, all those fears melt away.

 

[siddx]

going to a book store with a girl later today. This'll be my 4th(?) date with her. Going to ask her if she wants to come over to my place later in the week to watch the finale of Sons of Anarchy.

I'm trying to get over the awkwardness I'm imagining in my head.

Now is this really a date or just two people going to a book store together?

 

[JohnDoe8865]

Subscribed.

 

[Miguel]

:lol @ the achievement list names.

 

[TheKaeptain]

Just read the trophy list. :lol :lol :lol :lol

Damn I want to see what my total would be.

 

[BronzeWolf]

What happened to the first part? Well I am here!

Don't miss me too much players... It's just that I've gone INCOGNITO.

Just for the fun of it. My achievemente list

Numbers game (5pt/bronze)
Wine and dine (5pt/bronze)
Sloppy seconds (5pt/bronze)
Ewww! Cooties! (5pt/bronze)
Thar she blowz! (10pt/silver)
Deflowered (25pt/silver)
Escape teh friendzone (15pt/silver
Go getter (20pt/silver)
Player (30pt/silver)
Mack Daddy (40pt/silver)
Fuckin' boss (90pt/silver)
YOU ARE THE MAN!!! (150pt/gold)

Perfect 10 (100pt/gold) - This is what I am most proud of! Everybody telling you your GF is so hot is such an empowering feeling

Oh shit, I haven't done any of that kinky stuff on the DLC's! I must get to it

Also, this achievement

Daily grind (50pt/gold) - have sex with a different girl, for every day of the week, for one week

Is already called "The Perfect Week" ala "The Perfect Game" in baseball

 

[BronzeWolf]

going to a book store with a girl later today. This'll be my 4th(?) date with her. Going to ask her if she wants to come over to my place later in the week to watch the finale of Sons of Anarchy.

I'm trying to get over the awkwardness I'm imagining in my head.

Well you sure took your damned time. If this doesn't work out, remind yourself that you HAVE to pulling out moves FROM MINUTE ZERO.

good luck! touch her a lot!

 

[jon bones]

Heck, my fiance and I went to IKEA looking for a couch on our first "date".

i've been to IKEA with girls before - something about the maze / domestic nature of it actually seems to work for a "date" :lol

good luck! touch her a lot!

x2 on both! godspeed and always be increasing your physical intimacy slowly but surely.

 

[SmokeMaxX]

Again, not terrible. It's not like you left a message in a low throaty growl telling her you are going to cut a hole in her face and fuck it till chtulu rises from her asshole.

I'm probably gonna use this one today, but either in text form or real life. Wish me luck GAF.

 

[sadaiyappan]

Pourin 40's for Combine? Your supposed to Pour 40's if someone dies. Black culture joke in a girlfriend thread?

 

[jon bones]

Pourin 40's for Combine? Your supposed to Pour 40's if someone dies. Black culture joke in a girlfriend thread?

he got banned = dead to GAF

Thats not going very well at this rate.

well you're gonna have to work at it a lot. just know being laid back and proactive at the same time isn't impossible and it's never too late to dive in.

Just for the fun of it. My achievemente list

i wish there was a little place all the people who banged a 10 can post pics of our conquests and compare. i know i earned it but i wonder how many others did :lol

 

[Askia47]

Once you meet the right girl for you, all those fears melt away.

Thats not going very well at this rate.

 

[EraldoCoil]

Yay! New home part 2!!

 

[siddx]

he got banned = dead to GAF



well you're gonna have to work at it a lot. just know being laid back and proactive at the same time isn't impossible and it's never too late to dive in.



i wish there was a little place all the people who banged a 10 can post pics of our conquests and compare. i know i earned it but i wonder how many others did :lol

I'd post a pic of the girl I consider my 10 but to be perfectly honest I am terrified she would somehow stumble on this thread, hunt me down, and kill me.
I'm not even joking either. She HATES my guts.
I'll just describe her. Red hair, beautiful ass, C cup. Beautiful as hell. Crazy as hell. She will kill us all.

 

[POWERSPHERE]

My only advice is don't sweat the details like when is too soon to call, don't leave messages, keep the ball in your court etc. If this girl is into you and you her enough to have something meaningful, all that shit doesn't matter and will work out. If not, she wasnt right.

 

[Enco]

I'd post a pic of the girl I consider my 10 but to be perfectly honest I am terrified she would somehow stumble on this thread, hunt me down, and kill me.
I'm not even joking either. She HATES my guts.
I'll just describe her. Red hair, beautiful ass, C cup. Beautiful as hell. Crazy as hell. She will kill us all.

Do it.

You have to now

 

[BronzeWolf]

My perfect 10 was the perfect conquest for me. Maybe it wasn't perfect 10 for many, but it certainly was an impossible from the get go.

Successful
Older than me
Pretty
Tons of FZ'd guys
Teacher

But what made it epic was the conquest on the bed. God I turned her into a maniac XD

I'd post a pic of the girl I consider my 10 but to be perfectly honest I am terrified she would somehow stumble on this thread, hunt me down, and kill me.
I'm not even joking either. She HATES my guts.
I'll just describe her. Red hair, beautiful ass, C cup. Beautiful as hell. Crazy as hell. She will kill us all.

i wish there was a little place all the people who banged a 10 can post pics of our conquests and compare. i know i earned it but i wonder how many others did :lol

I haven't yet recovered from my last disaster for posting pics here, it really did affect my IRL. Now if there was a way to do it anonymously, I would do it, but certainly not here.