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Hot Mom Defends Herself Against Facebook Haters, gives a non-apology
- Thread starter Ripclawe
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MidgarBlowedUp
Member
RockTurtle
Member
Maybe its time you get professional help?
has anyone outright said they hate fat people here? i think the sentiment is that if you don't agree with the emphasis on a certain body image/physique, don't knock others that try to promote what is arguably a healthier lifestyle.
bengraven
Member
This was posted on an aunt's Fb page the other day with "Fuck you, eat a cheeseburger" and a response from some friend of hers was "women with curves are sexy! there's more to love!". This is from a woman who was at least 300 pounds.
Now, I know I've struggled with my weight and hate the "fuck fatties" crowd, but if you're really angry about this, it makes me think you've gone complacent and accepted your situation.
Now, I know I've struggled with my weight and hate the "fuck fatties" crowd, but if you're really angry about this, it makes me think you've gone complacent and accepted your situation.
BocoDragon
or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Realize This Assgrab is Delicious
You may be right about it being generally different outside of America. Even going to Canada you will find a slightly lowered level of obesity, and that's saying something since its basically the same mix of genetics and western attitudes and capitalism.... Just the portion sizes of food are 20% smaller, etc. A little dialed back.
And interesting tidbit about the deaf community. Maybe the nature of communication makes it harder to beat around the bush. And that definitely reminds me of the couple of times that Asian people have literally prodded at my waistline for evidence of chub
Cold blooded bluntness but... Honesty can be refreshing.Count Dookkake
Member
Steve Youngblood
Member
This touches on the fact that I do think it's important to find the right balance. Embracing obesity as some sort of new normal is bad. But I also think it's unfortunate to assume that any and all instances of an individual being overweight should automatically yield responses of people that think they're lazy and pathetic and are an easy diet change and a couple of jogs a week away from being in shape. I think the situation necessitates approaching the broad topic with nuanced views.
Not "screw you lazy fatties eat less pie LOL," and not "normal people don't look like Hollywood actors/actresses" in defense of knowingly maintaining a poor diet and lethargic lifestyle.
bengraven
Member
Well said.
I'm not sure what's worse. Shaming/degrading people or just accepting it knowing full well the dangers your lifestyle can bring. As a fat guy, I truly believe everyone who is overweight WANTS to be healthy and underweight, no matter how happy they are being "big" or "full bodied". I just can't imagine someone being happy with the negative attention we receive, the stress it causes on our lives and body, and the issues that can come up in the future.
But on the other side you have those who think we ALL are happy with how we look. Look at any thread about big people or soda.
Zoe
Member
She didn't need professional help.
I'd say being obnoxious and unkind.
I have sympathy for the obese, the poor, the uneducated, and the ignorant, but I do not have that same sympathy for the cruel. That is one flaw that I do not feel we should have compassion for, in the same way that we do not tolerate the intolerant.
Devolution
Member
Obviously working out isn't enough for her. She has to be a snobby ass about it.
But if you have back problems, rack pulls feel good god damn.
But if you have back problems, rack pulls feel good god damn.
Count Dookkake
Member
Solid picks. Not a fan of those traits, individually or paired.
CountAntonius
Member
People are too damn sensitive. The fact that there is an outrage and people are calling her a bully is ridiculous.
Zoe
Member
Isn't that part of the problem with her message? She's addressing it to moms, not personal trainers who are moms.
Devolution
Member
How fast you feel healthy and look the part depends on your starting position. Judging by the original pics she wasn't in terrible shape to begin with.
D
Deleted member 325805
Unconfirmed Member
Can't say I agree with that at all, you can see she's in great shape, not just skinny.
I also enjoy when people take particular care to point out how busy/hard working they are to emphasize that anyone can do it -- and while they often are busy people, if you are able to look closely the story breaks down considerably.
She says she has two jobs; that appears to be true. One of those jobs, however, is as a fitness professional, which sort of gives her a huge leg up on people whose two jobs might be McDonald's assistant manager and a night shift security guard position.
Trent Strong
Banned
Why is being cruel anymore under a person's control than what they eat is?
Zoe
Member
I was being facetious. The original comment was part of a thread about how all you need to do is 10 minutes of deadlifts 3 times a week.
Count Dookkake
Member
Winning answer.
Glass Rebel
Member
Yeah, going with a widely used phrase instead of a verbose wall of text that excludes all the people who have valid reasons just to not offend them really deserved the scorn of the internet.
But you're right, it really is in the eye of the beholder. I guess being around people who are into sports in fitness so much has accustomed me to this "language". I've seen people break under perceived pressure from course instructors even in some very laid-back Jujutsu classes because they asked people to attend more regularly, at least once a week. "Why is he being so judgmental, I can't stand it." and a month later they didn't show up anymore.
I really don't know what to tell you and I won't make any assumptions about you but from my experience phrases in the vein of "what's your excuse" are pretty common gym lingo. Most people don't spout these to bring others down but to motivate them and to spark someone's inner fire. It should make you think "YEAH I CAN DO IT" instead of "it's easy for you to say".
To me, it's just a question of attitude. After working out for months, building strength and muscle mass, I rebounded after me and my gym partner couldn't find the time to work out together anymore but I never thought it was his fault. It was mine for being a lazy and losing the comfort of being dragged along if I ever lost my drive. So I adjusted our joint workout plan and learned to live with the fact that I wouldn't have his assistance anymore when bench pressing and would have to count on my own motivation to stick to my workout schedule. The result is that I'm working harder than ever.
And I've already gotten the stink eye and passive-agressive comments from acquaintances and friends for using protein shakes or l-carnitine sports drinks, eating grapefruits, lean quark and cottage cheese or skipping on cake or french fries even though I've never "shamed" anyone into working out or dieting. I guess I should be offended as well. But I'm not because I'm confident in what I'm doing.
Devolution
Member
If that is her job then she even has a monetary incentive to go with the health one.
Not sure if this is a serious post.
She literally said she had to work through genetic issues and an eating disorder. What part of that makes it sound like she has a "natural predisposition" to being fit?
Part of the problem here is how we define "healthy." People tend to equate whatever is considered attractive in cultural norms with "healthy." A few decades ago, beauty in women was not considered so lean and muscular; as such, the picture on the left would likely have been considered "healthier" back then. Centuries ago, being obese was considered attractive, and I'm sure they would have considered her current physique very unhealthy.
As for the scientific consensus on this, it's still evolving, but generally we don't seem to be finding that very low body fat / lean muscle is actually the healthiest. In some ways it's healthier than being overweight, in some ways not.
But I doubt many people are observing this from a purely scientific point of view.
Baraka in the White House
2-Terms of Kombat
That there was a question.
D
Deleted member 325805
Unconfirmed Member
Correct in my case. I just look at her and my brain says "fit, in shape and healthy".
I'm not sure it is. It's possible being intolerant isn't under people's control, either. Unfortunately, that does not make it necessarily tolerable in a social contract.
As an extreme example to clarify my position: there is an emerging consensus that pedophelic tendencies are epigenetic preferences that many or most pedophiles don't really have control over. Despite this, we cannot tolerate their behavior because it's incompatible with the society we have built. Not only do we not tolerate it, we typically make their natural tendencies criminal and incarcerate them.
The same basic logic applies to cruel people on a smaller scale: while they may simply be genetically predisposed to cruelty, their tendencies may simply be incompatible with society.
Does it have to be a decision? And can we replace the word lazy with the word sedentary?
Now is it possible that people have, in the past thirty years, absent conscious decision, gradually led more sedentary lives?
It's not out of the question that people could be watching more television every week now than they did thirty years ago. We're certainly on the internet more. What active hobbies did these physically passive pastimes replace? And how much more opportunity to overeat are we given? The marketing and calorie dense foods are certainly there.
Maybe it's time to do something about the persecution complex then. "What's your excuse" is practically a fitness meme at this point. I've seen pics of wheelchair bound athletes, people with prosthetics, etc, doing bench presses and pull ups with that caption get spread all around FB and nobody got offended there.
A quick google of "Whats your excuse" returns the following:
Are those mean and offensive and condescending too?
Trent Strong
Banned
There's definitely a scientific consensus that being obese is unhealthy.
Good post. But I think you're still too easily dismissing how the original picture could be taken by those who aren't in the "fitness world." If she didn't want it to be misinterpreted, she shouldn't have posted it to her page.
I'm speaking as someone who has gone through phases of being out of shape and extremely in shape, and I think I "get" both sides. I'm sure I've evangelized for P90X to a certain extent, but I also get annoyed when my parents (who are both fitness freaks) talk about nothing else but their classes and diet and look down on people who struggle with weight (even though they both did earlier in their lives).
Staying in shape and eating well can be tough, but at a certain point excuses are just that--excuses to stay complacent.
The main thing I find distasteful is the utter disdain and lack of empathy many in this thread are showing (whether honestly or facetiously) for those who aren't in shape. It's just unnecessary and unhelpful.
It doesn't have to be a decision, but it certainly changes how we react to the problem. If it's a problem with lazy people simply being unwilling to work, we can "blame" the obese for their poor choices. If instead it's a consequence of a large cultural movement towards larger portion sizes at cheaper prices from fast food companies, then generally our framing of the discussion changes. It's no longer their "fault" of the people in the same way. If it's not a decision, rather than placing the blame on the consumers, we would need to figure out how to change cultural norms to correct the perfectly understandable negative behavior.
Zoe
Member
However there are studies that suggest slightly overweight people live longer. So if that's your definition of healthy, then it makes sense to say the left picture is healthier.
I said overweight.
Yup, she wasn't in the greatest shape, but she was a little chubby at worst. Regardless, she's done a great job of improving her physical appearance.
Overweight, not obese.
v
Lasthope106
Member
LMAO. Oh my sides...
Are we going by the BMI definition of overweight (BMI in the range of 25-29.9)?
If so, I have never heard of that range being beneficial to health unless it's in a person where most of their weight comes from muscle.
I realize BMI is an inherently flawed metric because it fails to account for lean tissue weight vs adipose tissue weight, but I haven't heard of any other "official" measurement of what is considered overweight.
What definition of slightly overweight did those studies use? Can you provide a link to any of them? I'd actually be really interested in reading them since I just completed a course on medical nutrition and not once did it mention having a BMI in the 25-29.9 range was healthy unless the person was an athlete or someone where most of that weight was coming from muscle.
I very much fid people in this thread overthinking this picture. She is demonstrating that even if you are a busy person with three kids, it's feasible for you to get in shape. Under the obvious implication that you aren't disabled or have an unusual situation which makes it literally impossible to exercise even at home, she's saying that with willpower and self discipline you can choose to be in great shape. If you aren't in great shape even though you may be busy, then it's either a choice or you lack character.
I'd guess that the people who have valid reasons to be in poor physical shape probably didn't think twice about this for the most part. Those who feel deep down that they could be doing more and aren't are those who are most offended.
There is a group of people to whom this picture doesn't apply, but let's not kid ourselves that there aren't a massive number of people who are out of shape due to a choice to be inactive, or that that choice is irresponsible.
I'd guess that the people who have valid reasons to be in poor physical shape probably didn't think twice about this for the most part. Those who feel deep down that they could be doing more and aren't are those who are most offended.
There is a group of people to whom this picture doesn't apply, but let's not kid ourselves that there aren't a massive number of people who are out of shape due to a choice to be inactive, or that that choice is irresponsible.
He's actually a war hero, and this is a rather graphic picture of his head injury.
I think it's really sad that people are harassing her directly because of this. Even if they do find the attitude arrogant -- it actually resembles the kind of "get motivated, no excuses" talk that any personal trainer or dude leading an exercise class will give you if you start flagging in your determination. At its core "dig deep and find another gear" is not a judgemental, hateful thing to say, and my guess is she would probably agree that if you are, for example, in the middle of chemotherapy, it's probably unusually hard to achieve the results she had. She unknowingly waded into the id of many body-conscious people and found defensiveness and anger there - when, to her, I think she was talking to the 125k followers she has who follow her blog, or read about her in magazines, who do so precisely to hear "get motivated!" messages like the one she got in trouble for.
Fat shaming sucks, but people voluntarily expose themselves to it to get motivated to change their lifestyles, and in that context (which her pic was taken out of), it at least has to be used as a premise. She didn't take out an ad on jezebel.com or Cancer Survivors Weekly and tell them all they were lazy.
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