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LGBThread |OT3| Friends of Dorothy!

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Christopher

Member
Have you seen the men's fashion thread all no thanks.

Nope not in the party but just wanna loon classy as I don't get to go to there kind of events much anymore

I had a white bow tie and white tuxedo shirt but thought it might be too much
 
*googles lewis black*

CZ4OJw7.gif

I was tired lol
 

Cosmic Bus

pristine morning snow
Went through my bi-annual lonely self-loathing downloads of the usual apps: Grindr, Tinder, Scruff, etc.

Scruff won't even let me log in, Grindr crashes if I try to message anyone, so in comparison Tinder isn't too bad, I guess. It keeps trying to recommend women and guys older than I set it for, but at least the app seems functional. Apparently you can only message someone if they "like" your profile in return, so ~ big surprise ~ there are zero matches for me, but I'll keep it around for a few days before giving up. :\
 

Lucario

Member
Went through my bi-annual lonely self-loathing downloads of the usual apps: Grindr, Tinder, Scruff, etc.

Scruff won't even let me log in, Grindr crashes if I try to message anyone, so in comparison Tinder isn't too bad, I guess. It keeps trying to recommend women and guys older than I set it for, but at least the app seems functional. Apparently you can only message someone if they "like" your profile in return, so ~ big surprise ~ there are zero matches for me, but I'll keep it around for a few days before giving up. :\

scruff and grindr are buggy messes with awful dev teams
grindr pisses me off so much. There's such a big userbase and so many opportunities to hire competent programmers and monetize, but nooooo, it has to stay a barely-functional piece of shit with no proper targeted advertising.

also, that "only can message someone if they like you first" system sounds stupid. Does it at least tell you when someone likes your profile? Seems like it puts way too much pressure on people to 'intrude' -- your only way to have conversations if you aren't comfortable sending the first message is to spam likes on people's profiles -- but at least it'll prevent dick pics, lol.

Someone needs to reimagine gay dating apps, create something where people are forced to be more honest about their expectations (ie, hookups v dating.) Back when I used them, it seemed like they were just becoming less functional by the day. Wish I had more time so I could program it myself :(
 

sruckus

Member
I feel like you might be confused on how STD's/STI's are transmitted.

I thought HIV specifically was blood transfer only. Idk I'm an idiot. We never discussed AIDS in Health class for HS (dumb, rural area) and I never really thought it concerned me anyway at the time or through most of college since I wasn't gay or whatever (ha).

edit: so how risky is oral then vs anal? I don't really have a desire right now for anal and even then I'm pretty confident it's only going to be in a relationship, lots of trust needed, etc.
 

Trigger

Member
edit: so how risky is oral then vs anal? I don't really have a desire right now for anal and even then I'm pretty confident it's only going to be in a relationship, lots of trust needed, etc.

Oral sex involves using the mouth to stimulate the penis, vagina or anus (i.e.,fellatio, cunnilingus, and rimming). It is possible for either partner to become infected with HIV through performing or receiving oral sex, though the risk is much less than for anal and vaginal sex.

The highest-risk oral sex activity is giving oral sex to a man, if he ejaculates (cums) in your mouth. There is little to no risk of getting HIV from other types of oral sex. Several factors may increase the risk of HIV transmission through oral sexual contact, including mouth ulcers, bleeding gums, genital sores, and the presence of other sexually transmitted infections.

Although rimming carries little to no risk of transmitting HIV, it does come with a high risk of transmitting hepatitis A and B, parasites, and other bacteria to the partner who is doing the rimming.

You should probably take the time to read the CDC's page on HIV/AIDS.
 

mantidor

Member
Ugh I read that AMA thread on Reddit about a guy becoming HIV+ from a CL encounter and using protection. I seriously want to crawl into a ball. Apparently you can get it from semen even? I mean what the hell can you do as a gay man to never have to worry....fucking never have sex? It's so ridiculous and unfair that this stupid disease exists.


hmmm I still don't get it, if you use protection, you don't get in contact with semen, thats the point, so how did he get it? oral?with no protection?
 

sruckus

Member
Faulty condom maybe?

I believe further down the guy admits the condom broke. And even then a lot of them are suspicious and thinks he may have gotten it in a previous encounter that there was no protection used, etc.

It's still a little scary b/c I have no idea how often a condom would break, if the guy would really know, etc.
 
Thank you for that info...so getting a little more specific...and I'm sorry for being such a clueless idiot...if you spit it out when it's done (i.e. no swallow) is the risk still much less or is it the fact that it's in your mouth period?
I'm probably wrong, but if there's a cut or an open spot inside your mouth I think you have a high chance of catching it.
 

Alcoori

Member
I'm gonna ask gay GAF since not to stereotype but gays dress nice!

Should I wear a bow tie to a wedding or standard tie

I would avoid it if you're not in the weeding party. I was wondering the same thing, opted for a regular tie and it was a good decision because only the groom wore one.

Thank you for that info...so getting a little more specific...and I'm sorry for being such a clueless idiot...if you spit it out when it's done (i.e. no swallow) is the risk still much less or is it the fact that it's in your mouth period?

In your mouth, period. When you swallow it gets destroyed by your stomach acid I presume.
 

Trigger

Member
Thank you for that info...so getting a little more specific...and I'm sorry for being such a clueless idiot...if you spit it out when it's done (i.e. no swallow) is the risk still much less or is it the fact that it's in your mouth period?

The minute it enters your mouth you're at risk, swallowing or not. It's still a pretty rare way to contract HIV. It's just important to get tested and only have sex with guys you trust.
 

mantidor

Member
Thank you for that info...so getting a little more specific...and I'm sorry for being such a clueless idiot...if you spit it out when it's done (i.e. no swallow) is the risk still much less or is it the fact that it's in your mouth period?

It's overall fluid contact, but no saliva, so swallowing or spitting makes little difference in the mouth, swallowing would make it get in contact with tonsils and throat though, if you have open wounds there, risk of transmission is higher.

HIV is ironically a very weak virus, the mouth and saliva are amazing barriers from all kind of infections, they kind of have to since we eat through them, which is why oral transmission is so low. But that doesn't give you a free card to go around having oral sex with anyone.
 

bsej87

Member
The fact that it's in your mouth. The membranes in your mouth are naturally pretty absorbent allowing for easy access to the blood stream. This is also assuming that there is no exchange of fluids whatsoever until ejaculation which is usually not the case.
 

mantidor

Member
The fact that it's in your mouth. The membranes in your mouth are naturally pretty absorbent allowing for easy access to the blood stream. This is also assuming that there is no exchange of fluids whatsoever until ejaculation which is usually not the case.

Where did you get that? the mouth is not absorbent as far as I know. It is a barrier, imagine if you eat a spoiled fruit and the bacteria had direct access to your bloodstream, it would kill you instead of just giving you stomachache. I'm pretty sure you are wrong, but if we have any doctors here clarification would be great.

And all this talk is making me paranoid :( I really need to get tested.
 

RM8

Member
I believe further down the guy admits the condom broke. And even then a lot of them are suspicious and thinks he may have gotten it in a previous encounter that there was no protection used, etc.

It's still a little scary b/c I have no idea how often a condom would break, if the guy would really know, etc.
They pretty much never break if you use them correctly. Which means mostly proper water based lubrication, not using them after expiration date, not carrying them on your wallet or other places where it could get damaged, etc.
 

bsej87

Member
Where did you get that? the mouth is not absorbent as far as I know. It is a barrier, imagine if you eat a spoiled fruit and the bacteria had direct access to your bloodstream, it would kill you instead of just giving you stomachache. I'm pretty sure you are wrong, but if we have any doctors here clarification would be great.

And all this talk is making me paranoid :( I really need to get tested.

I was thinking along the lines of the various sublingual medications available. So, it's not that the mouth can't absorb things, but you're right in that you're much less likely to get HIV via oral transmission and it probably is mostly from open sores/wounds/ulcers in the mouth and not an intact lining.
 

Cosmic Bus

pristine morning snow
also, that "only can message someone if they like you first" system sounds stupid. Does it at least tell you when someone likes your profile? Seems like it puts way too much pressure on people to 'intrude' -- your only way to have conversations if you aren't comfortable sending the first message is to spam likes on people's profiles -- but at least it'll prevent dick pics, lol.

There's only a notification when both people have liked each others profile: "You have a new match!" and their profile is automatically added to a sidebar where you're able to message them. There's no way to tell who has liked you or viewed your profile until this happens. You also cannot remove a like (only block/report the person), which is annoying, because the app seems to be randomly doing it now and then as I scroll through.

And yes, it's astounding how poorly-designed these apps all are. I mean, they're a world apart from the process I would prefer for meeting people, but sometimes desperation trumps everything else -- which is probably why so little thought goes into the functional aspect. People are going to use these things regardless...
 

sruckus

Member
And to top my mood off apparently Matt cheated on Russ (gay marine couple all over YT). Ugh I have such little faith in having a lasting relationship like my parents...with no affairs, lasting for 30 years now, etc. kids these days :/
 
And to top my mood off apparently Matt cheated on Russ (gay marine couple all over YT). Ugh I have such little faith in having a lasting relationship like my parents...with no affairs, lasting for 30 years now, etc. kids these days :/
WHAAAAAT? NOOOOOOOOOO
dude you just destroyed my day :c
 

sruckus

Member
WHAAAAAT? NOOOOOOOOOO
dude you just destroyed my day :c

Yeah it ruined mine too :(

Good news is he admitted it and was open about it and I'm hoping him and Russ can make it work. I know it has to be so hard being away like they are for some time, but still. Plus it continues what I've been saying. The consequences for this stuff can be so much worse for gay couples...
 

Goldrush

Member
Oh gosh.....That's horrible. The pressure of being the "perfect gays" must make it even worse for both parties.


On a happier topic, anyone listened to Steve Grand's new single, Stay. I find it really catchy.

Edit: oops. Wrong URL.
 
Man, she is not hot, she's not even thin, a bit fat (a bit, just a bit) but she is cute. I don't know, is just that I feel weird around her.
Oh wow lmao

Alright, soooo
What do you feel? Do you get nervous? Like do you feel your stomach mixing? Can you act like you would normally act when she's around?

Are you sure you don't feel attracted to her in any way?

You don't really have to answer anything if you don't want to.
 

daripad

Member
Oh wow lol

Alright, soooo
What do you feel? Do you get nervous? Like do you feel your stomach mixing? Can you act like you would normally act when she's around?

Are you sure you don't feel attracted to her in any way?

You don't really have to answer anything if you don't want to.

1. I feel... like if I needed to stay with her.
2. Not really
3. Not really
4. She has a nice personality. And she has a good face, so just losing some weight would make her look very very pretty.
 
1. I feel... like if I needed to stay with her.
2. Not really
3. Not really
4. She has a nice personality. And she has a good face, so just losing some weight would make her look very very pretty.
Hmmm... Well I've never felt that way for a Girl before. It also sounds like you see yourself in a relationship with her. Plus you seem attracted to her personality and traits.

Maybe you're bisexual leaning towards Guys, I think that's a thing.
 

daripad

Member
Hmmm... Well I've never felt that way for a Girl before. It also sounds like you see yourself in a relationship with her. Plus you seem attracted to her personality and traits.

Maybe you're bisexual leaning towards Guys, I think that's a thing.

Yeah, i thought those straight feelings had gone away or didn't even exist but they feel more real each time I see her.

But yes, I lean more on my gay side :p
 

Labrys

Member
Hmmm... Well I've never felt that way for a Girl before. It also sounds like you see yourself in a relationship with her. Plus you seem attracted to her personality and traits.

Maybe you're bisexual leaning towards Guys, I think that's a thing.

Yep, yep, that's most definitely a thing, as I am it, ahahhaa.

It's like, I can't deny my attraction to the same sex, but girls can sometimes be super duper cute and stuff. And while I can't see myself spending the rest of my life with one, I wouldn't be turned off by a relationship with one as long as I found them and their personality attractive.
ehehhhhh that's so shallow of me ;;
 
Yeah, i thought those straight feelings had gone away or didn't even exist but they feel more real each time I see her.

But yes, I lean more on my gay side :p
I think you should try to be friends with her and stuff and see where that goes.
Yep, yep, that's most definitely a thing, as I am it, ahahhaa.

It's like, I can't deny my attraction to the same sex, but girls can sometimes be super duper cute and stuff. And while I can't see myself spending the rest of my life with one, I wouldn't be turned off by a relationship with one as long as I found them and their personality attractive.
ehehhhhh that's so shallow of me ;;
Ahh, okay I did a bit more research about Bisexuality and it seems most bisexuals prefer one sex over the other. I'm sorry if I sound really ignorant about Bisexuality or sexuality in general, all I know is that I'm Gay lol.

I don't really see myself with a girl at all, like I'm not a 5 on that scale thing but I just don't feel physical attraction for girls.
 

Labrys

Member
Ahh, okay I did a bit more research about Bisexuality and it seems most bisexuals prefer one sex over the other. I'm sorry if I sound really ignorant about Bisexuality or sexuality in general, all I know is that I'm Gay lol.

I don't really see myself with a girl at all, like I'm not a 5 on that scale thing but I just don't feel physical attraction for girls.

And there's nothing wrong with that, nope. Everyone's different, and all that good stuff. Like, for instance, I'm currently looking for a relationship with, well, a man... That's what I like, but let's say if a Christina Hendricks-esque girl asked me out, yeah, I'd go for it. The problem with me is anyone actually finding me appealing enough to pursue a relationship with, heh.

I take it you're referring to the Kinsey scale? I'm a 4, I think. It's kinda an odd way of "measuring" sexuality, though, I'd much rather just go with how I feel, like I said.
 
And there's nothing wrong with that, nope. Everyone's different, and all that good stuff. Like, for instance, I'm currently looking for a relationship with, well, a man... That's what I like, but let's say if a Christina Hendricks-esque girl asked me out, yeah, I'd go for it. The problem with me is anyone actually finding me appealing enough to pursue a relationship with, heh.

I take it you're referring to the Kinsey scale? I'm a 4, I think. It's kinda an odd way of "measuring" sexuality, though, I'd much rather just go with how I feel, like I said.

I think it's mostly because Kinsey explicitly defines the scale as applied to male and female only. I'm somewhere between bi and pansexual, and while I'm more attracted to women, it's not strictly a gender thing - I just happen to be attracted to femininity and androgyny. It doesn't really leave any wiggle room for non-cis gender identity and all that.
 

7threst

Member
Thanks to this topic, I read up a bit on the Kinsey scale... so is that still some kind of academic thing to measure sexuality by? Because it sounds a bit simple to my ears... I mean, I'm really gay-only so I'm comfortable being scale 6, but can a bi-sexual man or woman really identify with one of those scales in the model of Kinsey? When are you 'bi-sexual by incident' and when are you 'equally gay- and heterosexual'? It sounds so weird and random to me. It hust depends who you meet and who you are attracted to, right? That's not really scalable I think :)

I probably sound a bit ignorant about this, sorry about that.
 
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