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[TheLegendary]

I said, even though you know what you know, I know that I'm ready to go, cause you're making me feel like I've never been born.

Sheeeit

 

[Dutch Gronk]

We do!!

YOOOOUUUUU!

 

[GraveRobberX]

YOOOOUUUUU!

http://www.phawker.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/12/colbert-finger.gif[img][/quote]

Oh you German, how I missed you <3

 

[Dutch Gronk]

Oh you German, how I missed you <3

 

[DeaconKnowledge]

Way too much MLP, nowhere near enough Transformers Prime.

 

[Kave_Man]

NFL-GAF brethren I turn to you.

What is the Wonderlic and why is it hilarious that Morris Claiborne only scored a 4 out of 50?

 

[eznark]

NFL-GAF brethren I turn to you.

What is the Wonderlic and why is it hilarious that Morris Claiborne only scored a 4 out of 50?

A timed general knowledge test. It's funny because it means he is not good at taking the Wonderlic test.

 

[GraveRobberX]

NFL-GAF brethren I turn to you.

What is the Wonderlic and why is it hilarious that Morris Claiborne only scored a 4 out of 50?

Intelligence Test, how fast you can recognize the solution

Look at the sample questions:

When a rope is selling 20 cents per 2 feet, how many feet can you buy for for 30 dollars?

Spoiler

A dollar gives you 10 feet, now times that by 30... you get your answer
If that shit took you more than 15 seconds, or even close to a half a minute+, *Ahem* "You're Already Dead"

Which of numbers in this group represents the smallest amount? a) 0.3 b) 0.08 c) 1 d) 0.33

Spoiler

If you are reading this spoiler FUCKING LOL @ YOU!

You get 12 minutes, correct answers give you points + allotted time bonus, take to long, points start get taken off

So Morris answered very wrong or took too fucking long

50 questions, 12 minutes

 

[Slo]

Are those type of questions actually representative of those on the test? He got THOSE wrong?

 

[cashman]

Are those type of questions actually representative of those on the test? He got THOSE wrong?

What's the issue? I got one of them wrong myself.

 

[GraveRobberX]

Are those type of questions actually representative of those on the test? He got THOSE wrong?

Yep

I really think this test weeds out Candidates who are susceptible by the NFL Community at large

"Yo' Morris want to invest in my Iceberg Farm, bring Fresh Water from the Arctic to the masses, it'll melt all by itself in the hotter climate, need $100,000 start up"

 

[Milchjon]

Are those type of questions actually representative of those on the test? He got THOSE wrong?

Well it's easy for you to make fun of those kids when you probably spent several years in college.

 

[eznark]

Are those type of questions actually representative of those on the test? He got THOSE wrong?

There is nothing easy about the test. Sure the questions are simplistic, but you have to answer 50 of them and your performance is potentially the difference between millions of dollars.

That said, WSJ had an article like 10 years ago about the test and according to Wonderlic data, NFL players do something like 85% worse than all other professions. Which is hilarious. Also, totally racist.

 

[Slo]

Well it's easy for you to make fun of those kids when you probably spent several years in college.

:jnc

There is nothing easy about the test. Sure the questions are simplistic, but you have to answer 50 of them and your performance is potentially the difference between millions of dollars.

That said, WSJ had an article like 10 years ago about the test and according to Wonderlic data, NFL players do something like 85% worse than all other professions. Which is hilarious. Also, totally racist.

That kind of pressure would increase the difficulty, but damn it's multiple choice.

 

[BigAT]

Are those type of questions actually representative of those on the test? He got THOSE wrong?

There's definitely harder questions than that on the test (the difficulty increases as you go through the 50 questions), but there are also questions that are even easier. I took a Wonderlic for a job interview once and there was a question that was something like "If today is Tuesday, what day will it be two days from now?" Multiple choice answers!

 

[eznark]

Yep

I really think this test weeds out Candidates who are susceptible by the NFL Community at large

"Yo' Morris want to invest in my Iceberg Farm, bring Fresh Water from the Arctic to the masses, it'll melt all by itself in the hotter climate, need $100,000 start up"

If you could purchase an iceberg, transport it to the states, start a bottling operation and work out the logistics for $100,000, I'd invest in a heartbeat. Bottled water is a margin gold mine, limited edition gimmicky bottled water? Home run. I'm in.

I'm looking at financial data for bottled water manufacturing right now: 17% RoE, 7% revenue growth year over year, 15% profit growth. The biggest barrier to entry is competition, and you eccentric idea has solved that, and for only $100k! Well done, graverobber!

 

[GraveRobberX]

OK GAF

12 Questions, 3 Minutes Allowed

Please Do Not Cheat

Every Question you get right add +1
Once 3 minutes pass -.5 every 15 seconds
If it takes over 10+ minutes - "U B Morris"

 

[Slo]

1) C
2) C
3) C
4) C
5) C
6) C
7) C
8) C
9) C
10) C
11) C
12) C

 

[GraveRobberX]

I think I failed the test from Laughing My Ass Off at Question #7

I wasted 3 minutes just giggling/laughing at that shit non-stop, I was like Really!?!


***Watch German Patriot work his ass off, to show his superiority***

 

[eznark]

:jnc



That kind of pressure would increase the difficulty, but damn it's multiple choice.

The best part is that it doesn't punish you for incorrect! You should be able to get more than 4 by simply guessing. However, I think the company does provide the actual tests upon request, so agents tend to recommend not guessing.

That's the other thing. Most of these kids do a ton of practicing and have extensive coaching on how to succeed at the test. First round guys who do terrible are troubling to me. Not because they are dumb but because they are probably uncoachable and struggle to handle pressure.

 

[GraveRobberX]

1) C
2) C
3) C
4) C
5) C
6) C
7) C
8) C
9) C
10) C
11) C
12) C

No

ABBA CA DAB BAA?

Some times that shit did wonders, I was like I passed Earth Science Mid-Term... DA FUCK!

 

[storybook77]

Pretty sure I got all of them right in under 3 minutes. Might have missed one though....

 

[bionic77]

If you could purchase an iceberg, transport it to the states, start a bottling operation and work out the logistics for $100,000, I'd invest in a heartbeat. Bottled water is a margin gold mine, limited edition gimmicky bottled water? Home run. I'm in.

I'm looking at financial data for bottled water manufacturing right now: 17% RoE, 7% revenue growth year over year, 15% profit growth. The biggest barrier to entry is competition, and you eccentric idea has solved that, and for only $100k! Well done, graverobber!

Plus it markets itself.

Nothing can be more pure than water from the Antarctic! Stop drinking that mud and bug infested shit from mountains and streams when you drink water from Superman's backyard!

 

[eznark]

Plus it markets itself.

Nothing can be more pure than water from the Antarctic! Stop drinking that mud and bug infested shit from mountains and streams when you drink water from Superman's backyard!

That's what I meant by gimmicky and limited. GraveRobber's Arctic Blast Bottled Water is sure to be an internet meme.

Alright, grave, me and bionic are in.

 

[GraveRobberX]

Pretty sure I got all of them right in under 3 minutes. Might have missed one though....

Was #7, wasn't it, that shit made your head go WAT!?!, not that you couldn't understand it or the pressure, just the base of asking a question like that might make your brain go, hey wait a minute...

 

[bionic77]

That's what I meant by gimmicky and limited. GraveRobber's Arctic Blast Bottled Water is sure to be an internet meme.

Alright, grave, me and bionic are in.

It doesn't even have to be from the arctic, just the first bottle.

After that we will just buy city water from whichever city sells it to us the cheapest and put an iceberg picture on the bottle.

Ez I am not going to lie. Once we are millionaires I am ditching the Democratic party like a fat girl at the dance and going full Santorum!

 

[GraveRobberX]

That's what I meant by gimmicky and limited. GraveRobber's Arctic Blast Bottled Water is sure to be an internet meme.

Alright, grave, me and bionic are in.

Hmm... Well the Gaming side has the Kickstarter making headway... hmmm

$100,000 per person, who the fuck needs that lotto jackpot

Me: "I'm Rich"

Kickstarter Backers: Hey wait a minute... Refund

Me: "Fuck Off"

 

[storybook77]

Was #7, wasn't it, that shit made your head go WAT!?!, not that you couldn't understand it or the pressure, just the base of asking a question like that might make your brain go, hey wait a minute...

Considering that is the month I was born in, no. :jnc

 

[eznark]

$100,000 per person

This is now a significantly different deal, so I'm cutting you out. Thanks for the idea though.

 

[Dutch Gronk]

I think I failed the test from Laughing My Ass Off at Question #7

I wasted 3 minutes just giggling/laughing at that shit non-stop, I was like Really!?!


***Watch German Patriot work his ass off, to show his superiority***

Asshole, I was actually doing my best :jnc

Spoiler

I'm clearly superior to you guys

 

[WanderingWind]

Asshole, I was actually doing my best :jnc

Spoiler

I'm clearly superior to you guys

It's this line of thinking that has led to some...issues...in the past with your people. Careful.

 

[GraveRobberX]

It's this line of thinking that has led to some...issues...in the past with your people. Careful.

They can't resist, it's in their DNA

He's also a Patriots Fan, Superiority­²!

 

[Dutch Gronk]

They can't resist, it's in their DNA

He's also a Patriots Fan, Superiority­²!

Master race of teams baby.

 

[Kave_Man]

Thanks guys.

Now I know but knowing is only half the battle.

But yeah not going to lie, not certain how well I'd do on those tests either. But I usually underestimate myself on tests. I remember for my assessment in college I had to do one on English. I expected to barely pass it as I only got Cs and Ds in high school English courses. I ended up scoring 99 percent.

Found out years later that my school apparently had one of the top English programs in the province.

 

[WanderingWind]

Thanks guys.

Now I know but knowing is only half the battle.

But yeah not going to lie, not certain how well I'd do on those tests either. But I usually underestimate myself on tests. I remember for my assessment in college I had to do one on English. I expected to barely pass it as I only got Cs and Ds in high school English courses. I ended up scoring 99 percent.

Found out years later that my school apparently had one of the top English programs in the province.

Well, see there you go talking all funny and whatnot. "Province?" Da fuq is dat shit? Speak Engligh or git out!

 

[Dutch Gronk]

A Luck private workout 2day..we want 2b as thorough n disciplined n process of #1 pick..we wanted 2do private with RG3,but his agent said no

Clearly racism is involved here.

 

[Hitokage]

Thanks guys.

Now I know but knowing is only half the battle.

But yeah not going to lie, not certain how well I'd do on those tests either. But I usually underestimate myself on tests. I remember for my assessment in college I had to do one on English. I expected to barely pass it as I only got Cs and Ds in high school English courses. I ended up scoring 99 percent.

Found out years later that my school apparently had one of the top English programs in the province.

Such tests are to gauge where you need to start in that program. So despite what I assume was high school laziness, you picked up enough to not have any need for remedial courses.

 

[Kave_Man]

Such tests are to gauge where you need to start in that program. So despite what I assume was high school laziness, you picked up enough to not have any need for remedial courses.

Either way thank god for that. Would have been 3 extra classes if I failed that assessment.

 

[Goro Majima]

https://twitter.com/#!/JimIrsay/status/187178027371859968

A Luck private workout 2day..we want 2b as thorough n disciplined n process of #1 pick..we wanted 2do private with RG3,but his agent said no

I'm guessing that RG3 doesn't even want to entertain the idea that the Colts will pick someone other than Luck. Or he just really prefers playing for the Redskins?

 

[eznark]

https://twitter.com/#!/JimIrsay/status/187178027371859968



I'm guessing that RG3 doesn't even want to entertain the idea that the Colts will pick someone other than Luck. Or he just really prefers playing for the Redskins?

Irsay is just playing the game Goodell and ESPN asked him to play.

 

[goldlion054]

https://twitter.com/#!/JimIrsay/status/187178027371859968



I'm guessing that RG3 doesn't even want to entertain the idea that the Colts will pick someone other than Luck. Or he just really prefers playing for the Redskins?

I read this too. I was so enamored by Irsay's way with words, I lost the meaning of it all. Thanks for the recap!

 

[Dutch Gronk]

And on the same day the Seahawks signed Kregg Lumpkin, they also hosted a visit for former Cardinals guard Deuce Lutui.

The Lumpkin has landed.

 

[Goro Majima]

I read this too. I was so enamored by Irsay's way with words, I lost the meaning of it all. Thanks for the recap!

It's great that a guy, who has more money than I can imagine, can't write a decent sentence to save his life.

 

[TheLegendary]

The Lumpkin has landed.

Hey, he's our guy!

I loved Lumpkin. Just like one hit wonder Samkon Gado. Fun times.

 

[Goro Majima]

If Nick Collins is healthy, I hope we bring him back.

Apparently Green Bay might shy away from him regardless of his health. I'm pretty sure one of the other teams will pick him up no matter what.

 

[Grover Cleveland]

A Luck private workout 2day..we want 2b as thorough n disciplined n process of #1 pick..we wanted 2do private with RG3,but his agent said no

Irsay still texts like a teenage girl.

And he does know that the Rooney Rule doesn't apply to draft picks, right? Jimmy, you don't have to pretend that you're even considering drafting the black guy when everybody and their uncle knows you're going after Luck.

 

[Futurevoid]

Alshon Jeffrey met with the Giants at his pro-day. WR has always been a possibility though they've been more associated with Hill for some reason.

http://blogs.nfl.com/2012/04/02/south-carolina-showcases-stellar-class-at-pro-day/

Jeffery, WR, (6-2 3/4, 213) &#8212; Jeffery, who did not do anything at the NFL Scouting Combine, had a very good pro day. He ran the 40-yard dash in 4.48 and 4.49 seconds. He recorded a 36-1/2-inch vertical, a 10-foot-2 broad jump, a 4.17-second short shuttle and a 6.71-second three-cone. His arms measure 33-inches long, but he didn&#8217;t lift because of a strained right shoulder. He caught the ball well. There had been some questions about his explosiveness, but he did well with all facets of getting open. Tennessee worked him out on Friday; the Giants met with him Monday, represented by receivers coach Kevin M. Gilbride. He&#8217;ll visit with the Vikings on Tuesday and the Jets on Wednesday.

------------------------------------------------

Oh and Jerrah outright admits he overpaid to get Brandon Carr jnc). Not sure of the context of the conversation though. I could give him the benefit of the doubt and write it off as him just joking to reporters but until I see it in video form....

http://www.nfl.com/news/story/09000...r-was-retail-price?module=HP11_headline_stack

"We know we overpaid to get Carr. Not overpay -- we paid retail," Jones said last week at the NFL meetings, according to the Cowboys' official website.

Carr's $50.1 million contract, of which roughly half is guaranteed, will keep him in a Cowboys uniform for the next five years. To put that in perspective, Jones originally purchased the Cowboys for $150 million in 1989.

In four years with the Chiefs, Carr accumulated 237 tackles and eight interceptions.

Not that the Cowboys are the first team to overpay, just surprising to see him outright admit it.

 

[GraveRobberX]

It's great that a guy, who has more money than I can imagine, can't write a decent sentence to save his life.

He's a hip owner, he tweets, facebook pokes you, four squares something or other

Sooner or later the Internet Ebonics becomes second nature Yo'

 

[Kosmo]

Any of those new unis leak yet?

 

[Dutch Gronk]

Any of those new unis leak yet?

They will hold some kind of fashion show at 11 am at the NFL shop in NYC.