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STEAM- Announcements & Updates 2011 Edition |OT2|

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C

Card Boy

Banned
I got Napoleon and Rome Gold Total War (Steam keys) if anyone wants to trade. I can do a 10 dollar game for both of em, i will even chunk in a Humble Bundle 2. It seems inline with the current sale.
 
D

Dead Prince

Banned
jim-jam bongs said:
Okay, one time when I was a little kid I was camping on a cattle farm in the Northern Territory which had a camp ground and a B&B thing. It was a beautiful property situated by a river, very lush and verdant. My attention, however, wasn't on the farm, but the farmer's daughter.

Now I don't want you to get the wrong idea. We were probably about nine or ten at the time, this was purely puppy love of the sweetest variety. Over dinner with our families we got to chatting as kids do, and she was really excited to have someone her age around since she "attended" the School of the Air, and the nearest family was a hundred kilometres away.

With this in mind, I casually asked her if she would like to come down to our camp site the next day and spend the day swimming and cavorting. Success! She said yes. Tired but elated I headed back to the tents with my family and went to bed.

The next morning, I awoke early and got ready for the day ahead. Keep in mind I was a kid, this mostly involved putting on sunscreen and zinc. And of course, the morning ritual of picking up the family e-tool and finding an appropriate place to poo in the bush.

This is serious business in NT. If you crap too close to your tents or bury your logs in too shallow a grave you might attract animals, some of which you really don't want wandering into your camp site in the middle of the night.

As I began to head into the bush I heard someone call my name and I froze. She had arrived. I panicked, at such a tender age I had no idea what the etiquette involved in these situations was. As far as I was concerned I was about to ask my date if she minded waiting while I laid the brown carpet and this was not a done thing.

So I kept it in. It actually wasn't so bad really, I hardly needed to go as it turned out.

The day was magical. We started out swimming in the river, then took a break to have some snacks graciously provided by my bemused parents and went for a walk. I had kissed girls before, but I could tell this needed a feather touch so I was playing it smooth, at least I thought so at any rate.

But as the day wore on I heard a grumbling start. Way downtown. For the first time in my life I experienced that moment where you know that good things are imminent if you stick around but you have to flee the scene for a shitty reason. No pun intended.

I had no real options though, where could I go? I pretty much had to wait it out and hope she got bored. Sometime mid afternoon this finally happened. Perhaps it was the occasional grunts from me, or the pained look on my face, but she didn't want to stick around for the pash which had been waiting all day in the wings for a chance to shine.

We were sitting in the river when we made our goodbyes. For some reason I was wearing budgie-smugglers, god why was I wearing budgie-smugglers. She asked me to walk her back to the path to her place and I knew that if I wanted to successfully raincheck the situation I'd need to do that or she wouldn't want to see me again. So we began the gentle walk back.

When we reached the path to her house we stopped, and a miracle happened. She turned to me and grabbed me in a passionate smooch and my little heart exploded with joy and ecstasy, that wonderful moment where it all just falls into place. I never ever wanted it to end.

After a while we separated and giggled a little in mildly awkward bliss. Then she crinkled her nose slightly and looked down at my smugglers and my heart sank. See, it wasn't just my heart that had exploded. The thrill of it all had apparently caused my sphincter to yelp with excitement, and my speedos were filled with poo.

She looked at me in horror. I stared back in shame. Without another word, she turned and walked back to her house and didn't speak to me again.

I'm not sure what the moral of that story is but I do think it's worth about the price of Alpha Protocol.
Click to expand...

i'm just going to quote this for future reading lol.
 
ColonialRaptor

ColonialRaptor

Member
jim-jam bongs said:
Okay, one time when I was a little kid I was camping on a cattle farm in the Northern Territory which had a camp ground and a B&B thing. It was a beautiful property situated by a river, very lush and verdant. My attention, however, wasn't on the farm, but the farmer's daughter.

Now I don't want you to get the wrong idea. We were probably about nine or ten at the time, this was purely puppy love of the sweetest variety. Over dinner with our families we got to chatting as kids do, and she was really excited to have someone her age around since she "attended" the School of the Air, and the nearest family was a hundred kilometres away.

With this in mind, I casually asked her if she would like to come down to our camp site the next day and spend the day swimming and cavorting. Success! She said yes. Tired but elated I headed back to the tents with my family and went to bed.

The next morning, I awoke early and got ready for the day ahead. Keep in mind I was a kid, this mostly involved putting on sunscreen and zinc. And of course, the morning ritual of picking up the family e-tool and finding an appropriate place to poo in the bush.

This is serious business in NT. If you crap too close to your tents or bury your logs in too shallow a grave you might attract animals, some of which you really don't want wandering into your camp site in the middle of the night.

As I began to head into the bush I heard someone call my name and I froze. She had arrived. I panicked, at such a tender age I had no idea what the etiquette involved in these situations was. As far as I was concerned I was about to ask my date if she minded waiting while I laid the brown carpet and this was not a done thing.

So I kept it in. It actually wasn't so bad really, I hardly needed to go as it turned out.

The day was magical. We started out swimming in the river, then took a break to have some snacks graciously provided by my bemused parents and went for a walk. I had kissed girls before, but I could tell this needed a feather touch so I was playing it smooth, at least I thought so at any rate.

But as the day wore on I heard a grumbling start. Way downtown. For the first time in my life I experienced that moment where you know that good things are imminent if you stick around but you have to flee the scene for a shitty reason. No pun intended.

I had no real options though, where could I go? I pretty much had to wait it out and hope she got bored. Sometime mid afternoon this finally happened. Perhaps it was the occasional grunts from me, or the pained look on my face, but she didn't want to stick around for the pash which had been waiting all day in the wings for a chance to shine.

We were sitting in the river when we made our goodbyes. For some reason I was wearing budgie-smugglers, god why was I wearing budgie-smugglers. She asked me to walk her back to the path to her place and I knew that if I wanted to successfully raincheck the situation I'd need to do that or she wouldn't want to see me again. So we began the gentle walk back.

When we reached the path to her house we stopped, and a miracle happened. She turned to me and grabbed me in a passionate smooch and my little heart exploded with joy and ecstasy, that wonderful moment where it all just falls into place. I never ever wanted it to end.

After a while we separated and giggled a little in mildly awkward bliss. Then she crinkled her nose slightly and looked down at my smugglers and my heart sank. See, it wasn't just my heart that had exploded. The thrill of it all had apparently caused my sphincter to yelp with excitement, and my speedos were filled with poo.

She looked at me in horror. I stared back in shame. Without another word, she turned and walked back to her house and didn't speak to me again.

I'm not sure what the moral of that story is but I do think it's worth about the price of Alpha Protocol.
Click to expand...

Fucking LOL!!

Winner - nominate the recipient :)
 
C

Card Boy

Banned
Looks like some Duke Nukem single player DLC is coming

VeGcm.png


I just clocked the POS today, only the last boss felt like a proper Duke Nukem game.

New weapons and vehicles

-Moon Rover
-Can kill expanded enemies (new weapon?)
-New weapon the 'Impregnader'
-New boss 'Doctor Proton'
 
S

Stallion Free

Cock Encumbered
Gez said:
Looks like some Duke Nukem single player DLC is coming

http://i.imgur.com/VeGcm.png[IMG]

I just clocked the POS today, only the last boss felt like a proper Duke Nukem game.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, those have been showing up on Steam achievement tracking sites for a while. Same with Dungeon Siege 3's.
Click to expand...
 
B

Blizzard

Banned
I like that hedonist one. What if those people who said Duke Nukem was offensive were the same people who went around slapping women in Deus Ex HR? :O
 
Z

zkylon

zkylewd
GhostRidah said:
I hope that Payday game really turns out great, the last heist type of game play I did was in GTA4 and that was the best part of the game.
Click to expand...
Exact same feelings. Loved that segment of the game, as i did in Vice City.

Pre-Cuba Kane & Lynch 1 wasn't all that bad, either.
 
B

Bluth54

Member
GhostRidah said:
I hope that Payday game really turns out great, the last heist type of game play I did was in GTA4 and that was the best part of the game.
Click to expand...
I'm pretty sure some of the team working on Payday were originally part of Turtle Rock Studios and helped make the first Left 4 Dead.
 
D

Drkirby

Corporate Apologist
Well, since I wanted 3 of the 4 games in the Dreamcast Collection, decided to just get the whole thing. I am a sucker for those games.

Tomorrow I'll get to see just how bad the ports are. Maybe I can override the graphical settings with the Nvida control panel.
 
N

Neki

Member
Can someone tells me how Might and Magic: Clash of Heroes plays? I'd download the demo, but I'm close to the bandwidth cap this month. xD
 
L

legend166

Member
Tongue said:
As an avid Total War fan I would recommend Empire by a country mile.

Shogun is fun but just feels way to small and watered down compared to Empire.
Click to expand...

Worth getting Napolean along with it? Or just go with Empire?
 
Sye d'Burns

Sye d'Burns

Member
ArjanN said:
But it does have Steam achievements.
Click to expand...


Well, what would you have me do? Rescind my condolences? Just take them all back?

I was horsing around in the first place? Gees. You know what? I'm sad now.
 
N

NaM

Does not have twelve inches...
I just submitted a ticket to support for the first time, how long is the average I'll have to wait before I get a response?
 
S

slidewinder

Banned
legend166 said:
Worth getting Napolean along with it? Or just go with Empire?
Click to expand...
I haven't played Napoleon, but it's supposed to be better than Empire, which I have, and which is a pretty sloppy game with a lot of issues. Medieval 2 would be a better buy than Empire, at least, if you're looking for one relatively cheap TW game, in my opinion.
 
L

legend166

Member
slidewinder said:
I haven't played Napoleon, but it's supposed to be better than Empire, which I have, and which is a pretty sloppy game with a lot of issues. Medieval 2 would be a better buy than Empire, at least, if you're looking for one relatively cheap TW game, in my opinion.
Click to expand...

I already have Medieval II.

Maybe I'll just get Napolean.
 
A

Aselith

Member
XeroSauce said:
I haven't spent money on Steam in a long time. It feels so good. So clean.
Click to expand...

Alpha Protocol on sale. $2. Just $2 measly, little dollars. Join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...
 
T

The_Player

Member
Aselith said:
Alpha Protocol on sale. $2. Just $2 measly, little dollars. Join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...join us...one of us...
Click to expand...
It's less then a dollar to me, and I'm still not confident on buying it.
 
A

Aselith

Member
The_Player said:
It's less then a dollar to me, and I'm still not confident on buying it.
Click to expand...

It's a great game if you like games of the style that it is. I think the story and characters are better than Mass Effect and you have much more of an impact based on your decisions. Some don't don't like the gunplay but I thought it was solid. That game is a really good pickup.
 
S

Snuggles

erotic butter maelstrom
SalsaShark said:
I liked Alpha Protocol better than Mass Effect 2 and i havent even played Alpha Protocol yet.
Click to expand...

I'd say that I like Mass Effect 2 and Alpha Protocol equally. I enjoyed the poop out of both games.
 
S

Snuggles

erotic butter maelstrom
The_Player said:
It may be so, but I just don't want to touch anything that is even close to ME2. Neither ME3, nor AP.
Click to expand...

Alpha Protocol is nothing like either Mass Effect game, or any Bioware game for that matter.
 
T

The_Player

Member
Snuggler said:
Alpha Protocol is nothing like either Mass Effect game, or any Bioware game for that matter.
Click to expand...
I totally understand, but after ME2 failed so hard to me, something died inside me, and although I understand that AP may be a good game, I just can't play it, or even thinking about playing it. You know, that feeling of total disillusion, like after divorce. I know, it's a one weird comparison, but I hope you got my point.
 
D

daviyoung

Banned
The_Player said:
You know, that feeling of total disillusion, like after divorce. I know, it's a one weird comparison, but I hope you got my point.
Click to expand...

Not really. I rented AP on PS3 when it came out, I wanted to love it but didn't get very far. I bought it for 360 when it was cheap, played about an hour and haven't touched it since. Now I've bought it off Steam and am really not looking forward to it at all. However, it is one of the most unique games of this generation and even though it's a bit shit, it's well worth dabbling in for this price.
 
S

Snuggles

erotic butter maelstrom
The_Player said:
I totally understand, but after ME2 failed so hard to me, something died inside me, and although I understand that AP may be a good game, I just can't play it, or even thinking about playing it. You know, that feeling of total disillusion, like after divorce. I know, it's a one weird comparison, but I hope you got my point.
Click to expand...

Ah, so did it turn you off games all together, or just games that involve RPG elements and guns?
 
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