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Tinder is destroying men’s self-esteem (New York Post)

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I

Irnbru

Member
JadedWriter said:
One or two a week is better than me. I haven't gotten a single match since I redownloaded the thing about 3 or four weeks ago.
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Welcome to the club! lol, I've even had my female friends help me spruce up my profile, take better pictures of me and what not. Crickets! Woo!
 
J

JadedWriter

Member
lightskintwin said:
It's all good. I don't take myself seriously and can take a good ribbing or roasting.



The question is do you look it? Pics of me from last month.

fC-jMglXmPWdeeOCXWvBWaUWR33KgGRB0NdEGx9uF_fzy0y9j0-EX7cAWfH7XaPMrsNM0FlQ8annzOWHwV6O-9gZ318y5Xx1b-85_2AwJrWSLfjBNuQAoCX_Tdkg8_YfeG9LpQCEhdYOY55gh5oXnvHrcWg1BH6dHUlcBuqjTTuFqgaP77Q6Q8CE1Z7xCTvHjmMaikUVdcHcmyaNu7vnx5_NlR4WAcUORgMXq9zF5xGm1nIqvP9JhPCEsEZxnbpiogG3AtF6RN-JrZvN20jMmLDCXrq0xn0PSo8rxE1gcngPkn5yRqrLFjQF3-poFAo3fSxHJJaxGCoL0dz-J33cxz-YXcxGGbAOLkbLr4_No7v88w9Ux0QCSMUUr6au3VOhXiZUE3J1_CWbSU-CaZOINNYxdAiF59nAYamkGb5-Zh7vrWYpb-97Sjzpiugxd4VW6KKsbJbPetVQEbUYtnARICD-G9b3Gb5iJPp6Jk9MNZVehyBaH1OZGehXRuWG39Ra5u3oOJycLaZBMnKao7p9xP6n4zg2vfLuTuThjPYhkufllNBkGqYGPMvvMG5td3Y2d-TIA3glcE6YnmL65WArflGGnbw1HMQ0qc5oCcmBglOErGTm99gHlgqo1r-ucWxAUlf6uDPEAocVC6MT1EufoGpsMDZRTNWSHFccIJ4394r9UEaVAl7Txogdj4zQGZJg=w1174-h575-l75-ft

10915294_10202370163174069_6909935541115350708_n.jpg
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I'm 32 and still look about mid 20's.
Irnbru said:
Welcome to the club! lol, I've even had my female friends help me spruce up my profile, take better pictures of me and what not. Crickets! Woo!
Click to expand...
Yeah my dating life has always been horrible, which was why I was never really trying to dump my ex. I always just worked shit out with her, then it just got to a point where our relationship wasn't really going anywhere and once it became an actual relationship between adults instead of two people fucking it got too intense for her and we pretty much just decided to mutually break up. Now here I am in the dating scene, a scene I didn't enjoy and didn't want to be a part of ever again.
 
S

Secret Fawful

Member
Lightskintwin has me wondering if he's ever pulled a Prestige on people and swapped lives or pretended to be the other twin to fool people or some shit.

What we don't know is that he's secretly the first successful cloning experiment. There's actually five hundred of him roaming around.
 
L

lightskintwin

Banned
Just so you know Black don't crack. In the first picture the girl on the left hand side that's darker skin was my girlfriend in college from 20 years ago.
 
E

excelsiorlef

Member
lightskintwin said:
It doesn't just as long as you don't tell me I'm wrong or I shouldn't do it, as another poster in here did.
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Actually what I said is that it is bad general advice. This started as you giving advice to someone else.



Mega said:
I'm doing the complete opposite and asking people not to assume their mentality and their local situation is the same as what this guy sees and experiences in his neck of the woods. It's fine if you don't like it and other people don't like it, but it went further than that to personally attacking him over their personal beliefs.
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No one can know if any specific woman is going to be cool or comfortable with it until she reacts, problem then is by the time one knows she doesn't want it she's already experienced it, whereas if one asks she'd have been spared unwanted sexual touching.

Also for some women it might be hard to say no due to anxiety or fear or whatever.

If it works for someone because they go to specific places where this is specifically understood as a given occurrence and essentially by entering you consent to it, that's a somewhat different story but that is flat out not how this topic was initially presented and that was not what I was reacting to.
 
F

flintstryker

Banned
You know its interesting for me to see people complaining about going bald when I have been deliberately balding my head for the past year despite being perfectly capable of growing a good head of hair
 
L

LookAtMeGo

Member
flintstryker said:
You know its interesting for me to see people complaining about going bald when I have been deliberately balding my head for the past year despite being perfectly capable of growing a good head of hair
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When you have a nice head of hair that you have been rocking your whole life and the day comes you have to shave it for reasons out of your control, it sucks.
 
J

JadedWriter

Member
flintstryker said:
Naw I was in a mostly white area in Delaware and the hair salons there couldn't give me a proper cut so I bought a machine and just shaved everything off, and realized it looked good so I just continued doing it.



look at that mug can see yourself in it!
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Oh ok, that makes more sense. Luckily black men don't need hair to look good. Some white people really need that hair to cover up their egg domes. Not everyone can be Patrick Stewart.
 
G

GamerSoul

Member
LookAtMeGo said:
Going bald sucks. I will embrace it when the time comes but guna have to get huge.
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I'm 25 and I have already given up that fight. My dad has a better hairline than me. My DAD who is over 50.I blame my Mom lol. Coincidently, I'm hitting the gym more and attempting to grow a beard. Life finds a way.
 
F

flintstryker

Banned
JadedWriter said:
Oh ok, that makes more sense. Luckily black men don't need hair to look good. Some white people really need that hair to cover up their egg domes. Not everyone can be Patrick Stewart.
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I'm surprised how well it seems to be working for me actually so I'm definitely gonna keep sporting this look for the foreseeable future additionally I save a small fortune not having to go to a barber.

edit: My cus did the same thing, saw he was losing the hair and just met it half way, I personally think he looks a lot better than way too
 
L

lightskintwin

Banned
Cindi Mayweather said:
Your jacket arm looks a bit long, Twin. Take it to a tailor.
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Too late, that particular jacket; I got drunk and left it at some spot I was at.

excelsiorlef said:
Actually what I said is that it is bad general advice. This started as you giving advice to someone else.
Click to expand...

I told you that what you interpreted was correct and you began to tell me I was wrong. As I said, not all rules apply to everybody equally at all times. Remember that instead of playing soapbox wars.

excelsiorlef said:
No one can know if any specific woman is going to be cool or comfortable with it until she reacts, problem then is by the time one knows she doesn't want it she's already experienced it, whereas if one asks she'd have been spared unwanted sexual touching.

Also for some women it might be hard to say no due to anxiety or fear or whatever.

If it works for someone because they go to specific places where this is specifically understood as a given occurrence and essentially by entering you consent to it, that's a somewhat different story but that is flat out not how this topic was initially presented and that was not what I was reacting to.
Click to expand...

Let's be honest you made a lot of assumptions. It's Ok, but understand giving online advice with a limited worldwide perspective and experience actually limits the scope of your advice. Understand the social interaction between opposite sexes can be sloppy, imperfect, and chaotic but ultimately it's effectiveness can differ in specific situations. People have different boundaries and you have no idea if your crossed it, until they let you know then back off. The reality is there are no hard rules to it and everybody's learning as we go. Individuals have to figure out what works for them. Which is why I let my real world experience dictate my maneuvers, because there's too many inexperienced people giving advice over the internet and pretending it's applicable at all times.

flintstryker said:
You know its interesting for me to see people complaining about going bald when I have been deliberately balding my head for the past year despite being perfectly capable of growing a good head of hair
Click to expand...

It depends, Black men in general tend to look better with bald hair than White men. You can thank Aaron Hall, R. Kelly, and Michael Jordan for that. LOL


flintstryker said:
Naw I was in a mostly white area in Delaware and the hair salons there couldn't give me a proper cut so I bought a machine and just shaved everything off, and realized it looked good so I just continued doing it.



look at that mug can see yourself in it!
Click to expand...

My father's family is from Delaware. My grandfather and father both graduated from Delaware State and my grandfather was a judge there. Matter of fact, i went to elementary school there from Kindergarten to 3rd grade, and moved to George before 4th grade.
 
K

KingV

Member
flintstryker said:
Naw I was in a mostly white area in Delaware and the hair salons there couldn't give me a proper cut so I bought a machine and just shaved everything off, and realized it looked good so I just continued doing it.



look at that mug can see yourself in it!
Click to expand...

When I was navy there was only one dude on our submarine that could cut hair, but he wasn't really a barber, so much as just a guy that learn to cut his friends hair growing up. As a result he only really knew how to do black haircuts. So everybody on the sub, no matter their race or hair type had fades and line ups.
 
F

flintstryker

Banned
KingV said:
When I was navy there was only one dude on our submarine that could cut hair, but he wasn't really a barber, so much as just a guy that learn to cut his friends hair growing up. As a result he only really knew how to do black haircuts. So everybody on the sub, no matter their race or hair type had fades and line ups.
Click to expand...

Haha I bet they were all better off for it
 
E

excelsiorlef

Member
lightskintwin said:
I told you that what you interpreted was correct and you began to tell me I was wrong. As I said, not all rules apply to everybody equally at all times. Remember that instead of playing soapbox wars.



Let's be honest you made a lot of assumptions. It's Ok, but understand giving online advice with a limited worldwide perspective and experience actually limits the scope of your advice. Understand the social interaction between opposite sexes can be sloppy, imperfect, and chaotic but ultimately it's effectiveness can differ in specific situations. People have different boundaries and you have no idea if your crossed it, until they let know then back off. The reality is there are no hard rules to it and everybody's learning as we go. Individuals have to figure out what works for them. Which is why I let my real world experience dictate my maneuvers, because there's too many inexperienced people giving advice over the internet and pretending it's applicable at all times.
Click to expand...



In the context of the advice you were giving. That is not good general advice period. My response was to reiterate that as general advice one should not do that.

I'd note you literally accused me of being uptight because I think women just being sexually touched without seeking any sort of consent first is distasteful, so if you wanna talk about making it personal.

Also wanna know another way to find someone's boundaries? Ask.... I mean this is my issue with this concept as a general rule of advice rather than a place specific thing where all this is understood to be part of the event so to speak. The end result is a bunch of women get unwanted sexual touching because how else were you going to find out if they were in to that, that's not cool.

Most people are ok with peanut butter, but some people are allergic, I don't wait to find out if someone's allergic by giving them peanut butter and seeing it they have a reaction...
 
E

ethanny2

Member
I always thought grinding on random girls(*when they are okay with it) was totally fine (in nyc), I even saw peolle doing it in japan, think it has to do with the music playing, u wont see people grinding to edm or something
 
C

cyborg009

Banned
Do did anyone here try Bumble and tbh I've might actually try Tinder now since I'm out of college and don't really meet people anymore.
 
F

flintstryker

Banned
lightskintwin said:
Bruh, you got mad potential, you remind me of my boy G in the middle. He pulls mad chicks and he's from New York.

215118_1094845731249_916_n.jpg
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haha I do pretty well in person but when I was in Delaware I seemed to have no luck on tinder so I said fuck it..though strangely I was killing it with the European girls that come down there to work for the summer and at the bars in Dewey beach I had good luck with the girls when random guys weren't trying to pick fight with me.

I'm in Mexico City now though and I can hardly keep up with the matches on Tinder complete opposite of my experience in DE.

On a complete side note when I told my American friends I was coming to Mexico they all collectively loss their shit warning me about how dangerous it is here and how I will be kidnapped and robbed and all manner of shit and now that I'm in the city that couldn't be further from the truth, Americans seem to have a warped perception about Mexico.
 
Y

y2dvd

Member
LookAtMeGo said:
Back on the subject of Tinder. Do you really have to be witty with your first response? Is just saying hi or how are you considered lazy or something?

What would be the equivalent to grinding up on someone right away in opening text chat form?
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That's boring and lazy. Say something specific about one of their photos or something in their profile.
 
Laieon

Laieon

Member
Tinder helped my self esteem. Met my first girlfriend through the app, we've been together more than a year now.
 
O

Oxn

Member
ethanny2 said:
I always thought grinding on random girls(*when they are okay with it) was totally fine (in nyc), I even saw peolle doing it in japan, think it has to do with the music playing, u wont see people grinding to edm or something
Click to expand...

The hell are you talking about. Edm was created for grinding.
 
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