Dating-Age |OT5| Halp me pls. In the bathroom.

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I'm not actually that serious, I just look it. Sure I'm kinda grumpy but I've been told I'm also friendly. Old people seem to like me right away, so do kids. I don't know if that means anything lol.

Well in the dating world, "looking like" something can really work against you. Believe me, I'm the same way--I look really serious and abrasive, but I'm usually really friendly. But that doesn't matter much in a scene where first impressions are important.
 
So...about my question, people?

Yay or nay?

Approach with caution.

It's been a while since you even talked, and now you're going to be messaging her out of the blue with a lot of new info. If you aren't careful, it could come off as some weird booty call. If anything, maybe feel around first if you can - she might be with someone else now, she might not feel very strongly about you anymore.

The phrase 'strike while the iron's hot' comes to mind. You've waited a very long time. Maybe too long - but there's only one way to find out. And if you're not even speaking at this point, what have you to lose?
 
So, I met a cool girl, and we have some chemistry.

Went out with her yesterday, arranged to meet her again on Sunday. She seems to want to meet up to hang out before then (hasn't asked directly, but it's kinda obvious).

Am I right to limit face-to-face to more romantic situations where possible, for the time being anyway?
 
So, I met a cool girl, and we have some chemistry.

Went out with her yesterday, arranged to meet her again on Sunday. She seems to want to meet up to hang out before then (hasn't asked directly, but it's kinda obvious).

Am I right to limit face-to-face to more romantic situations where possible, for the time being anyway?

I mean, as long as you're making it clear that you want to date her in a romantic sense, and aren't leaving that ambiguous, then I don't see a problem with you two spending more time together, even if it's not the typical "romantic date" stuff.
 
So, yes the crazy ex weasels her way back in again and again.
Going ad far as making another FB account and messaging me.

She loves me she hates me, we say goodbye and she finds a way to contact me.


The new drama brought to the table.."I love you, your the right choice for me...but I've grown to have feelings for him! He's a terrible choice and bad idea but I always make the wrong choices!"

The kicker is...she wants me to wait around, not telling me too just saying she hopes I do. Says if I do wait around and she comes back she'll completely submissive to me...wtf.
Tells me she's waiting for a clear sign he's wrong for her.

I basically said "whatever"

I didn't know what to say and it hurt me and caught me off guard.
 
So, I met a cool girl, and we have some chemistry.

Went out with her yesterday, arranged to meet her again on Sunday. She seems to want to meet up to hang out before then (hasn't asked directly, but it's kinda obvious).

Am I right to limit face-to-face to more romantic situations where possible, for the time being anyway?

Don't worry too much about recipes and strategies. You seem headed the right direction.
 
So, I met a cool girl, and we have some chemistry.

Went out with her yesterday, arranged to meet her again on Sunday. She seems to want to meet up to hang out before then (hasn't asked directly, but it's kinda obvious).

Am I right to limit face-to-face to more romantic situations where possible, for the time being anyway?

Meet her. Be honest ,happy and funny. If she likes you , the romance progresses naturally.
 
So many pretty girls in my uni and there's nothing I can/will do about it. Got less than a year left too. This sucks.

This was me throughout all of college. In the end I only asked out three girls. Two had boyfriends, one wasn't interested.
 
I mean, as long as you're making it clear that you want to date her in a romantic sense, and aren't leaving that ambiguous, then I don't see a problem with you two spending more time together, even if it's not the typical "romantic date" stuff.

Don't worry too much about recipes and strategies. You seem headed the right direction.

Meet her. Be honest ,happy and funny. If she likes you , the romance progresses naturally.

Cheers for the advice. I won't worry too much about it then. And she definitely knows my motivations, I've been pretty clear with that sort of thing (only caused problems in the past).
 
Tell her to fuck off once and for good
Ignore this trash, it won't do you any good

I know, it's not like I don't and everyone doesn't tell me the same thing. I can't explain what it is.

I've been hanging out with another girl who's the "right one" but my attraction is for the "wrong one"
 
I know, it's not like I don't and everyone doesn't tell me the same thing. I can't explain what it is.

I've been hanging out with another girl who's the "right one" but my attraction is for the "wrong one"

Right one made me chicken soup and got me a get well card. We then sat on her bed and I had zero want to take it farther, was happier talking like a buddy...the wrong girl wouldn't have made me shit or got me a card but I would have been all over her in a millisecond.

Mrs. Wrong had to tell me all about the billionaires birthday party she went to this weekend. Then she saw on my IG that me and Mrs.Right went to a block party in South Philly some gutter-punks had. She proceeded to let me know how un-itellectual I was and above me.

She's been texting me all day today and yesterday trying to explain the situation. How she needs me but can't abandon him cause feelings have arisen. She's with him tonight in NYC at some Fangoria thing or some shit but expects me to come by Thur for sex no doubt.

Sounds like a classic case of being attracted to "bad boys" or in your case "bad girls"

You don't want a dependable, responsible girl, you want one that is spontaneous and changes her mind often which keeps you on your toes

It's very common, especially when we are younger, but in general its not a healthy or long-term solution imo
 
I can't explain what it is.
You were wronged by your ex, hence you want some kind of "vengeance" on her. So you meet new girls only because you want your ex to know that other girls want you. Stop seeing this new girl if you have no interest in her, you're just stringing her along in your psychological "warfare" with your ex. You two are literally behaving like high schoolers would.

Its obvious you want your ex around, because if you really told her to fuck off then the results would be different. Therefore, just get back with her. The problem is that you're both so immature and insecure that you can't help one-another grow.
 
I know, it's not like I don't and everyone doesn't tell me the same thing. I can't explain what it is.

I've been hanging out with another girl who's the "right one" but my attraction is for the "wrong one"

Right one made me chicken soup and got me a get well card. We then sat on her bed and I had zero want to take it farther, was happier talking like a buddy...the wrong girl wouldn't have made me shit or got me a card but I would have been all over her in a millisecond.

Mrs. Wrong had to tell me all about the billionaires birthday party she went to this weekend. Then she saw on my IG that me and Mrs.Right went to a block party in South Philly some gutter-punks had. She proceeded to let me know how un-itellectual I was and above me.

She's been texting me all day today and yesterday trying to explain the situation. How she needs me but can't abandon him cause feelings have arisen. She's with him tonight in NYC at some Fangoria thing or some shit but expects me to come by Thur for sex no doubt.

So, yes the crazy ex weasels her way back in again and again.
Going ad far as making another FB account and messaging me.

She loves me she hates me, we say goodbye and she finds a way to contact me.


The new drama brought to the table.."I love you, your the right choice for me...but I've grown to have feelings for him! He's a terrible choice and bad idea but I always make the wrong choices!"

The kicker is...she wants me to wait around, not telling me too just saying she hopes I do. Says if I do wait around and she comes back she'll completely submissive to me...wtf.
Tells me she's waiting for a clear sign he's wrong for her.

I basically said "whatever"

I didn't know what to say and it hurt me and caught me off guard.

So what exactly do you want people to say? Nothing has changed and you're in the same exact board that you were before, the previous advice from everyone still stands.
 
Sorry torontoml. But try making different friends to open your circle to new people.

And be more open minded. The harassment you got was because you said it. If you think it, you more or less get it. Case in point, those replies.
 
You overestimated the timing, but you definitely weren't wrong.

I feel bad for Chicken Soup Girl, the real hero of this story.

Obviously since he doesn't want to have sex with Chicken Soup girl 24/7 so she's clearly terrible to date. God forbid there be a non-sexual part to a relationship! *eyeroll*

I know sexual compatibility is important to many relationships, but I'm sure most of you know I'm talking about extremes here
 
Well anyone at Fangoria movie premiere at the IFC place in NYC is more then happy to go see her with her other love tonight.
Look for the slutty blonde with fake tits and the guy who looks like Anton Levey fucked a gopher.
Had the nerve to call me from the train..

Your mindset reeks of bitterness and some insane amounts of jealousy.

And lol at you still talking to her. If you hated her so much you think you'd block her number.
 
Hello team, I went out for coffee with this girl I met on tinder. We stayed there for about 3 hours talking and crap. After I texted her I would like to take her out again and she responded with it was nice to met me and she would like to go about with me again. When is the proper time to text her with another date or am I just overthinking it, I am just trying not to come off as desperate or needy.
 
Your mindset reeks of bitterness and some insane amounts of jealousy.

And lol at you still talking to her. If you hated her so much you think you'd block her number.

Hates her, loves the attention.

Hello team, I went out for coffee with this girl I met on tinder. We stayed there for about 3 hours talking and crap. After I texted her I would like to take her out again and she responded with it was nice to met me and she would like to go about with me again. When is the proper time to text her with another date or am I just overthinking it, I am just trying not to come off as desperate or needy.

I've never thought someone was too needy or desperate from normal texts soon after a date. If you want to wait, I wouldn't wait more than two or three days to contact her again.
 
Sorry torontoml. But try making different friends to open your circle to new people.

And be more open minded. The harassment you got was because you said it. If you think it, you more or less get it. Case in point, those replies.

The "harassment" is nonexistent. Unless pointing out someone's negative attitude when they ask for advice constitutes harassment now?
 
Hello team, I went out for coffee with this girl I met on tinder. We stayed there for about 3 hours talking and crap. After I texted her I would like to take her out again and she responded with it was nice to met me and she would like to go about with me again. When is the proper time to text her with another date or am I just overthinking it, I am just trying not to come off as desperate or needy.

I don't get it. You texted her that you'd like to go out again, she responded she'd like that, and that was it? Why didn't you offer up a date right there and then? Anyway, just do it.
 
So many pretty girls in my uni and there's nothing I can/will do about it. Got less than a year left too. This sucks.
Come on man, cut the woe-is-me stuff. Even I hit on girls like crazy when I was in college. Basically zero success rate, but at least I pushed myself out of my comfort zone. Better to fail than not try at all.
 
The "harassment" is nonexistent. Unless pointing out someone's negative attitude when they ask for advice constitutes harassment now?

I'm legit confused as to what 47's even talking about, honestly. Like I know what he's referring to, but the sentences, like... Why is he talking about making new friends? Does he mean that as general advice, or as a "get other people to talk about this stuff with"? Not to mention the rest of the post. My reading comprehension might just be failing me right now, though.
 
My friends told me it would come off as need and shows desperation. Maybe my friends are idiots.

Are your friends single? Otherwise.......

But no, it's not desperate or needy. If she was receptive of the date, then she's keen to go out again then any timeline of communicating with her and expressing your interest to go out again is welcome.

At the very least you could've ended it with "Great. I'll let you know my schedule by this weekend and we can figure something out".

Nonetheless, set up a second date soon.
 
My friends told me it would come off as need and shows desperation. Maybe my friends are idiots.

It'll come off however she wants it to. If she likes you this wont be an issue. If she doesn't, nothing you do was going to work. You're friends are naive. People decide whether shit is deparate for themselves. Unless you're literally being a overbearing, suffocating idiot with a girl, she is not going to find that kind of behaviour desperate "if" she likes you. If she doesnt, it doesnt matter what she thinks now does it?
 
Well anyone at Fangoria movie premiere at the IFC place in NYC is more then happy to go see her with her other love tonight.
Look for the slutty blonde with fake tits and the guy who looks like Anton Levey fucked a gopher.
Had the nerve to call me from the train..

I haven't ever enjoyed someone's bitterness and pettiness the way I enjoy yours. Its sad and attention whore like, but it makes me realize that regardless of scores or misses with girls, it's good to look at myself and know I'm not like this.

I dunno why you're so bent out of shape about this girl. Yelling slut slut whore may make yourself feel better but it is still just slipping to a level ofnpathetic from with there is no defense. She's the horrible person and yet you're fucking some girl with legit feeling for you so you can get back at her. But she's the slut, the whore, the terrible person. Yeah okay, God I hope your son doesnt learn about how to treat women from you.
 
Well anyone at Fangoria movie premiere at the IFC place in NYC is more then happy to go see her with her other love tonight.
Look for the slutty blonde with fake tits and the guy who looks like Anton Levey fucked a gopher.
Had the nerve to call me from the train..
Nice, I was going into the city anyhow.
 
I haven't ever enjoyed someone's bitterness and pettiness the way I enjoy yours. Its sad and attention whore like, but it makes me realize that regardless of scores or misses with girls, it's good to look at myself and know I'm not like this.

I dunno why you're so bent out of shape about this girl. Yelling slut slut whore may make yourself feel better but it is still just slipping to a level ofnpathetic from with there is no defense. She's the horrible person and yet you're fucking some girl with legit feeling for you so you can get back at her. But she's the slut, the whore, the terrible person. Yeah okay, God I hope your son doesnt learn about how to treat women from you.

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So true though.

*fist bump*
 
I'm legit confused as to what 47's even talking about, honestly. Like I know what he's referring to, but the sentences, like... Why is he talking about making new friends? Does he mean that as general advice, or as a "get other people to talk about this stuff with"? Not to mention the rest of the post. My reading comprehension might just be failing me right now, though.

No idea. I feel like a direct quote would have been helpful.
 
Well anyone at Fangoria movie premiere at the IFC place in NYC is more then happy to go see her with her other love tonight.
Look for the slutty blonde with fake tits and the guy who looks like Anton Levey fucked a gopher.
Had the nerve to call me from the train..
I was this bitter once. Never again, it's not worth it.
 
My friends told me it would come off as need and shows desperation. Maybe my friends are idiots.

Well, there are times to play the "don't text immediately" card, and since you had only talked about another date but didn't ask, I assume your fiends figured you shouldn't text right after that conversation and ask.

My point was more that, since you were already discussing another date, and she seemed interested, you should have just asked then.
 
1378269204650.jpg


So true though.

*fist bump*

*Receives fist bump*

Man I use to be really bitter about women maybe 3 or so years ago. But like, eventually you have to decide who you wanna be and how you wanna luve and value your life. Life is a lot better with a new outlook and approach that doesn't involve being so angry people don't wanna be in a relationship with me. Like there is so many better uses of energy.

Instead of focusing so much on wanting women I just focused on becoming a better more rounded person. Expanding my tastes. Doing new things. Life is great when you arent so fucking bitter :P
 
*

Instead of focusing so much on wanting women I just focused on becoming a better more rounded person. Expanding my tastes. Doing new things. Life is great when you arent so fucking bitter :P

*joins fist bump*

Absolutely. There are a few guys in here that are super jaded. I get that dating can make you feel that way, but you really can't let it get to you. You do you, as they say.
 
Met a girl on Monday on my first day of classes due to one of my friends. Said friend brought up my story of getting drunk at Vegas and wanted to me to re-tell it to said girl. What an excellent icebreaker...
 
Met a girl on Monday on my first day of classes due to one of my friends. Said friend brought up my story of getting drunk at Vegas and wanted to me to re-tell it to said girl. What an excellent icebreaker...

Sounds like your friend giveth, and your friend taketh it all away again.

Just tell him he's a terrible wingman, he'll get the hint.

But yeah, it's day one. Plenty more people out there. Don't sweat it too much.
 
Met a girl on Monday on my first day of classes due to one of my friends. Said friend brought up my story of getting drunk at Vegas and wanted to me to re-tell it to said girl. What an excellent icebreaker...

So did you tell it?

I don't see why this is necessarily a bad thing or at least not salvageable.

Also don't talk to girls when your friend is around. Is he the type to get pissed when others have sex and drunkenly yell at his boss at a work party
and still keep his job
?
 
Second date with girl I met on tinder yesterday (actually the first and only one I talked to), watched movies at her place like the first time but got closer this time, couldn't get myself to kiss her the first time, she seems a bit shy and so am I, also lacking some confidence, but yesterday we kissed for a good hour before I left, feel much more confident with her now
smile.gif

Now on to third date next week.

Turns out the artist's a good movie for cuddles.
the blue balls though, damn. Hard time falling asleep afterwards
 
So did you tell it?

I don't see why this is necessarily a bad thing or at least not salvageable.

Also don't talk to girls when your friend is around. Is he the type to get pissed when others have sex and drunkenly yell at his boss at a work party
and still keep his job
?

iunderstoodthatreference.jpg

Something tells me there was something super embarrassing in said story...
More info plz AnathemicOne

Second date with girl I met on tinder yesterday (actually the first and only one I talked to), watched movies at her place like the first time but got closer this time, couldn't get myself to kiss her the first time, she seems a bit shy and so am I, also lacking some confidence, but yesterday we kissed for a good hour before I left, feel much more confident with her now
smile.gif

Now on to third date next week.

Turns out the artist's a good movie for cuddles.
the blue balls though, damn. Hard time falling asleep afterwards

Congrats!

Well, not on the blue balls, but for the rest of it.
 
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