If the Dick Bruna thing is the sort of joke you find funny, then maybe you aren't worth the time and effort either.
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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already
- Thread starter gaiages
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Messofanego
Banned
Frankly they're dodging a bullet if liking your intro dick pic joke is the litmus test. Why not start off with a rape joke, too?
please dont
Subpar Scrub
Banned
Being witty? That mostly boils down to your confidence, knowledge, humour etc.
Don't be cocky, but being politely assertive and confident isn't a bad thing. Don't be afraid of being proud of your achievements or skills, but don't act like you're top shit and the best at everything. People will see right through that.
artsi
Member
My advice is to stop reading about it and go talk to women.
Messofanego
Banned
Seems like a lot of work to fake. Do you hate just being yourself?But i don't have achievement im proud of.
I also read about faking it, life's all about it, faking confidence at interviews, presentations to your bosses... Would that work for dating? How do i fake wits....
I won't do it like I've said before, I would just be curious how the general response was. You're all forgetting how crazy awesome Miffy is in the Netherlands though and how big of a national hero Dick Bruna was.
I don't find it particularly funny, I'm just hypothetically interested in the response. Like, would people be annoyed, get a mini heart attack, laugh it off. Don't worry about me though, I hardly message people on Tinder (maybe talked to like 10 people in total ever) and I've always been respectful, just asking what's up and eventually we would discuss Jacobi polynomials or a discussion on clinical psychology she had as a major.
Hey, how about not using a dead guy as the butt of your joke? It's just a prank, bro!
Then you go out there and do things that would make you proud! Start with little goals. Go volunteer at an animal or homeless shelter or something.But i don't have achievement im proud of.
I also read about faking it, life's all about it, faking confidence at interviews, presentations to your bosses... Would that work for dating? How do i fake wits....
Megalosaro
Banned
My girlfriend really wants to pick us up from the airport when we land sunday morning.
I'm torn on it. On one hand, some of the rapport with the roommate has been re-established through the comradry of the week and suffering of the heat.
But I don't thing that things will ever be the way it was, nor do I think they should be. He has got some issues and it's too exhausting having to deal with them like I used to.
Back on point to my GF though. She knows that there is friction there. I've talked a bit about him and how he's bitter, but I haven't really told her the whole picture. She really REALLY wants him to like her and be nice to her, but I don't see that ever happening. For one thing, he doesn't handle seeing pepole in relationships well, when he's not. But the crux of his issues with me right now stems from his belief that I'm settling, both career and in my relationship? How do I explain to her that he thinks she isn't good enough for me? How do I explain to her that he thinks she's "fucking ugly" and that he can't even look at her. How do I explain to her that he thinks she's of "lesser value" because she's 5 years older than me.
I don't really care what his opinions are. I'm crazy about her. But she thinks it is important that I stay in his life because he needs a good role model and positivity in his life, and without me there he'd become worse. I've tried that before. It is too exhausting.
So.. should I let her pick us up?
I'm torn on it. On one hand, some of the rapport with the roommate has been re-established through the comradry of the week and suffering of the heat.
But I don't thing that things will ever be the way it was, nor do I think they should be. He has got some issues and it's too exhausting having to deal with them like I used to.
Back on point to my GF though. She knows that there is friction there. I've talked a bit about him and how he's bitter, but I haven't really told her the whole picture. She really REALLY wants him to like her and be nice to her, but I don't see that ever happening. For one thing, he doesn't handle seeing pepole in relationships well, when he's not. But the crux of his issues with me right now stems from his belief that I'm settling, both career and in my relationship? How do I explain to her that he thinks she isn't good enough for me? How do I explain to her that he thinks she's "fucking ugly" and that he can't even look at her. How do I explain to her that he thinks she's of "lesser value" because she's 5 years older than me.
I don't really care what his opinions are. I'm crazy about her. But she thinks it is important that I stay in his life because he needs a good role model and positivity in his life, and without me there he'd become worse. I've tried that before. It is too exhausting.
So.. should I let her pick us up?
artsi
Member
Maybe you should just explain to her that your "friend" is a fucking asshole and neither of you should be spending time with him.
I mean seriously, the dude is clearly toxic both to you and your relationship.
Megalosaro
Banned
I tried explaining that, but well... she said he's just acting this way because he's hurting.
And his therapist will have a lot of baggage to work with, and maybe he'll become a better person and be happy at some point.
But neither you or she are that person. It's not just about the professional knowing better how to deal with and help people get over their mental hangups, it's also (and this is extremely important) about them being able to set the other person aside once the session is over and not deal with them 24/7 because it is not a personal relationship.
It's great that you are more cordial with him now, that will help make your temporary stay with him more bearable. But the less you invest in this person, the better off you will be. Don't try to be a savior, especially not to the detriment of your own mental health.
Honestly, I'd just be vague with her. If she brings it up occasionally and you can shoot it down without her pressing the issue any further, I'd just leave it at that. But if she kept insisting to the point where it brought some tension into the couple, I'd bring up the 'ugly' and 'lesser value' comments to get her to understand your point of view. It might hurt temporarily, but she doesn't have a relationship with him, so it will be easy for her to just label him a jerkface and move on.
artsi
Member
I wouldn't mention either of those things, they're horrible things to hear from anyone. If someone said that to me about my girlfriend I would whoop their ass.
LordKasual
Banned
Develop a natural sense of confidence and do it naturally
that isn't really something you can just "choose" to pull off.
What the fuck?
You're "FRIENDS" with this little cunt? How have you not fought him already?
You don't need to tell her shit. I think you should explain to that crusty cunt you call a friend that what he thinks is of no consequence to anyone, and he should keep his shitty opinions to himself?
He doesn't think shes not good enough for you, and he probably doesn't even really think she's ugly.
The problem is that you're leaving him behind, and this is his way of dragging you back down to his level. Misery enjoys company, and you're currently an example of what he wants but doesn't have.
Your friend is the definition of toxic. You can try to save him if you want, but please understand that you can't help people like that without being subjected to their poisons.
NotTheGuyYouKill
Member
Been chatting with this girl since May. We've only been on two actual dates (our schedules are wonky this time of year) but we talk pretty often over text.
I texted her yesterday that I liked her and asked about the possibility of a long term relationship between us, she said that she was out with her friends at happy hour, needed to conserve her battery, and that she'd message me later. She messaged me this morning that her WhatsApp isn't working, aaaand... Nothing else.
That's not a very good sign, right?
I texted her yesterday that I liked her and asked about the possibility of a long term relationship between us, she said that she was out with her friends at happy hour, needed to conserve her battery, and that she'd message me later. She messaged me this morning that her WhatsApp isn't working, aaaand... Nothing else.
That's not a very good sign, right?
EchoChamber
Member
😔😔😔
I think you scared her.
PancakeBurglar
Member
Probably not, if she was interested she'd most likely get back to you sooner. Also I'd recommend having a relationship conversation in person too.
artsi
Member
You don't do that after two dates man.
And you really should've seen her more often than 2 times in 3 months if you both were that interested in each other.
LookAtMeGo
Member
This girl on Tinder asked for my number after we chatted for a bit. Now she wont stop texting me every 5 minutes with tons of heart and kisses emojis. She wants to meet on Monday. Im scurred.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Run. That's the female equivalent of "pls respond."
LookAtMeGo
Member
Thats what I'm thinking. She seems really bubbly and kind but a bit too much with the texts.
One text after I didnt respond for a few hours was "where did you go!? Come back to me! 😍😍😗💋"
Her english isnt very good and she just moved here from Japan. Not sure if or why that would have anything to do with it?
It's over. You may get a courtesy text saying that it won't work or that's she flattered but doesn't see a future with you. Otherwise it's finished.
That's the kind of thing you say to someone when you're cuddling after sex and you've been seeing eachother for a month or so. Not after two dates. Lesson learned, dude.
LookAtMeGo
Member
What I dont get is that girl that ghosted me twice a while back keeps on sending me random texts now and again asking if I want to meet up soon. But she keeps on saying that she is busy and that eventually she will meet up lol. I dont ever text her. Last time I was like look, you ghosted me twice and then I didnt hear from you again for weeks then you keep asking if I am going out or to meet up, and then you say "but not right now" if youre not interested just stop texting me. Shes all like oh I am interested I am just so busy with work moving and blah blah blah.
I have no interest in her at this point outside of physical attraction because she is damn fine but I just find it hilarious. What is the thought process here? She added me on facebook. She likes lots of stuff I post. I just find it really odd.
I have no interest in her at this point outside of physical attraction because she is damn fine but I just find it hilarious. What is the thought process here? She added me on facebook. She likes lots of stuff I post. I just find it really odd.
Mr Solo Dolo
Member
Wouldn't necessarily call it a date but I agreed to meeting a girl before she met her friends for a night out.
It went well, there was no awkward silences but she did keep bringing up an ex. Time comes for her to meet her friends and I walk with her to them, but sods law we bump into the ex mentioned, and that's that. Next.
It went well, there was no awkward silences but she did keep bringing up an ex. Time comes for her to meet her friends and I walk with her to them, but sods law we bump into the ex mentioned, and that's that. Next.
I wouldn't say such a thing, let alone text it. At least if you say it in person you get an answer.
That thing should happen naturally.
LookAtMeGo
Member
There seems to be a general rule about half your age +7 being the youngest you should go. At least I hear that all the time. But no you are fine. Just prepare for headaches.
manfestival
Member
I am a little confused on the proposed expectations on communications with a female that you may be dating. So for example, like I know that it is a constant thing to not always be responding for the sake of coming across as desperate. However if we have begun dating, what are the views of that. I dont want her to think of me as playing games or anything of that nature.The rest of this relationship is gonna be an adventure cause well things could go amazing or bad and we would have to put up with each other for a long time on a trip
Puck Beaverton
Banned
I like to think of my weirdness as a social experiment. Makes me feel better.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Would you guys please read at least some of the posts in this thread before commenting? And beyond that, would you all please provide adequate context? Let's take these one by one:
- Stop using the word "females."
- Are you actually dating this girl? You say you "may" be dating her; however, you're also apparently going on a trip. Clearly, you need to share more information.
- If you're actually dating, yes, you should be communicating. I don't understand why you're framing it as desperation.
- All relationships could go well or poorly.
She probably just likes the attention. I dont have time for crap like that anymore so I would just cut contact.
i think perhaps the thing that is striking me the most right now is that the one person i want most to talk to about this all because she would help me cope or make sense of it or just generally make me feel all warm and better is the person i just broke up with
just taking it a minute, an hour, a day at a time...
just taking it a minute, an hour, a day at a time...
always crazy bacon
Banned
Jzero
Member
Yea definitely don't waste your time on her.
LookAtMeGo
Member
Yeah its pretty damn annoying.
Haha I know I'm an idiot. I dont feel the need to block her number or anything or block her on facebook or anything like that. I just wont respond to her if she texts again. I probably wont run into her at the bar much anymore because she moved about a 30 min drive out of town. Would have been nice if she actually used my dick for an emergency though. Oh well.
But i don't have achievement im proud of.
I also read about faking it, life's all about it, faking confidence at interviews, presentations to your bosses... Would that work for dating? How do i fake wits....
Being confident isn't about believing that you'll be successful. It's rather about being comfortable with whatever happens, whether you're successful or not.
Don't fake it. Practice it genuinely.
Confidence comes from being honest with others and opening up. It comes from not being afraid to be wrong, not being afraid of rejection, and from learning from others, all without fear of looking stupid.
Being open to grow in general is the mark of genuine confidence. It's all about not being afraid to just be yourself, even if you aren't that impressive on paper. Just embrace your direction in life.
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
So, you're saying... it's The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck?
Maybe work on the confidence issues.
Oh, fucking great :| Like come the fuck on dude
Why are you talking like this
Advocatus Diaboli
Member
Typical female. Can't even grasp the man's query concerning his tireless quest for romance.
Teach me more about queries senpai, that word's too hard for a lowly female like me
always crazy bacon
Banned
You wont block her because you also like the attention.
always crazy bacon
Banned
Have you guys had any luck on POF? I call it Plenty of Flakes. First off, I'm older so I'm dealing with women in their 40s but man what a losing streak I'm on. I'm tempted to delete my profile.
Woman 1: get her number, arrange a date. Day of date cancels on me, says she has social anxiety. Says the timing isn't right. A few weeks later she texts me out of the blue to tell me she quit her job and is going on vacation. Then nothing. Then I get a notice from POF that she is interested in meeting me. I tell her that she has my number and can text directly and said something like, yeah I wanted to poke you or something like that. She's on vacation now and still reaching out to me via POF.
Woman 2: get her number, she's very friendly. Wishes me good morning on POF, not by text. I hadn't texted her the day before. We texted and then silent, like no response. I texted a few times, I'm not one to text and text and text. Like she dropped off the face of the earth.
Woman 3: get her number, says she's going to a conference. Gave her space, didn't text in over a week. Text her and says she's busy and text later. To her credit she did much later that night and apologized for the delay but said that the silver lining was when she had time to stop and relax she thought of me. How sweet. Says we really need to get together. Asked her out and haven't heard back yet. Suggested a time and place not the well what do you want to do. Nothing.
I'm not sure why I stay on there, I must be a glutton for punishment.
Woman 1: get her number, arrange a date. Day of date cancels on me, says she has social anxiety. Says the timing isn't right. A few weeks later she texts me out of the blue to tell me she quit her job and is going on vacation. Then nothing. Then I get a notice from POF that she is interested in meeting me. I tell her that she has my number and can text directly and said something like, yeah I wanted to poke you or something like that. She's on vacation now and still reaching out to me via POF.
Woman 2: get her number, she's very friendly. Wishes me good morning on POF, not by text. I hadn't texted her the day before. We texted and then silent, like no response. I texted a few times, I'm not one to text and text and text. Like she dropped off the face of the earth.
Woman 3: get her number, says she's going to a conference. Gave her space, didn't text in over a week. Text her and says she's busy and text later. To her credit she did much later that night and apologized for the delay but said that the silver lining was when she had time to stop and relax she thought of me. How sweet. Says we really need to get together. Asked her out and haven't heard back yet. Suggested a time and place not the well what do you want to do. Nothing.
I'm not sure why I stay on there, I must be a glutton for punishment.
always crazy bacon
Banned
POF is awful but works for some people depending on location. I'd advise going for a paid site where you should get less time wasters.
That's what I'm thinking. Honestly I'm ignored 90% of the time and to get 3 numbers is really impressive on there for me. But when push comes to shove they bail out. I think so many of them are on the fence, figure it's free, and make a profile.
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