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[Salamando]

You thinking coffee or drinks? I tried the dinner thing on my first date and felt awkward.

Get coffee or drinks within walking distance of a few restaurants. Coffee is a perfectly fine place to start a date, but it's better to finish it elsewhere, even if you're just walking around the block.

Something suggested elsewhere in the thread, that I thought was brilliant - make the date for coffee, but set the meeting point somewhere outside the coffee shop. Like a nearby street corner. That way your first interaction isn't "So what would you like?"

 

[ZackieChan]

You thinking coffee or drinks? I tried the dinner thing on my first date and felt awkward.

You may want to check out the first post in this thread.

 

[DeathoftheEndless]

Hope I'm wrong, and I know I'm late to this since he's gone, but Cordy's story REEKS of catfishery. Best of luck to you friend.

He said he video chats with her, so probably not. Whether she could handle a relationship with an actual person and not a computer screen is another story however.

Quick update, but my relationship with the girl I used to work with is going really well. She is pretty awesome. I was never that successful with online dating, but I definitely learned a lot from it.

 

[Ray Wonder]

You thinking coffee or drinks? I tried the dinner thing on my first date and felt awkward.

I always ask to do drinks, or to go to bowling alley that has a bar and decent food.

 

[Spinluck]

Yeah dinner dates usually end up with some jokes and laughs. Then when the food comes my date usually doesn't finish and I'm eating like plate 2 or 3 lol.

I usually give them an option of coffee or something though and they opt for dinner.

Anyway, at least I avoid looking like a total slob. I've heard some hilarious dinner dates stories.

 

[ZackieChan]

My usual MO for first dates is:
1) meet at a cafe to see if initial impression/attraction/conversation is good
2) move to get something to eat if we're vibing and having a good time
3) still having fun? Go to a movie, karaoke or something where we can be close
4) 😎

 

[Izuna]

Man fuck. This girl had to explain her lack of time and I feel bad. I am reminded once again that globalised love is still fucked.

Theresa May is such a cock block

 

[WolfeTone]

You thinking coffee or drinks? I tried the dinner thing on my first date and felt awkward.

Echoing what the others have said, do coffee or drinks first. It's an easier environment to chat in because you're not being interrupted by servers or having to worry about talking with your mouth full.

For first dates, after coffee I'd suggest a walk if the weather permits it.

I usually wait until the second date before asking the girl to dinner once I've established that we can hold a conversation. Although you could add this on to your first date after coffee if you feel it's going well. I don't really do this because I generally prefer shorter first dates.

Man fuck. This girl had to explain her lack of time and I feel bad. I am reminded once again that globalised love is still fucked.

Theresa May is such a cock block

You're being vague. How are we supposed to help?

 

[Izuna]

You're being vague. How are we supposed to help?

Nah, no one can.

~~

Anyway, as for first dates. Thing is, I've been on awesome Tinder dates, sub-par OkCupid dates... I fucking hate one night stands or casual stuff, because it's soulless. Someone I can hop around restaurant dates with is who I'm looking for. Of course, that's far less likely in the shit-hole I currently live in now, and certainly, a pool of students isn't helpful.

But I was referring to a student who was taking her Masters and was 30. Bright, well-spoken (with a dope accent) and was happy to hang but broke af. Trendy dates or restaurant dates tell me if there's a certain level of sophistication I'm used to. I suppose that sounds pretentious, and it is, but after dating the same person for so long, I know that's what I'd like.

I'll have to wait until I'm 25 and in a professional workplace (here's hoping). Restaurants dates shouldn't be only for the rich goddamnit.

 

[ZackieChan]

"rich"

Your prior post still makes no sense, btw.

 

[WolfeTone]

Nah, no one can.

~~

Anyway, as for first dates. Thing is, I've been on awesome Tinder dates, sub-par OkCupid dates... I fucking hate one night stands or casual stuff, because it's soulless. Someone I can hop around restaurant dates with is who I'm looking for. Of course, that's far less likely in the shit-hole I currently live in now, and certainly, a pool of students isn't helpful.

But I was referring to a student who was taking her Masters and was 30. Bright, well-spoken (with a dope accent) and was happy to hang but broke af. Trendy dates or restaurant dates tell me if there's a certain level of sophistication I'm used to. I suppose that sounds pretentious, and it is, but after dating the same person for so long, I know that's what I'd like.

I'll have to wait until I'm 25 and in a professional workplace (here's hoping). Restaurants dates shouldn't be only for the rich goddamnit.

So your problem is that she can't afford to go on fancy restaurant dates with you?

I can sympathize to a certain extent. I've dated people less well-off than I am and it makes things like going out to a restaurant more challenging, especially if they refuse to let you pay.

Have you considered offering to pay for dinner for these girls? Or maybe just date women of a similar age to yourself who are more financially well-off?

People have different priorities with their money. Not everyone wants to spend a lot of cash in luxurious restaurants, but there are certainly foodies out there under the age of 25, though less common since a large number are students.

 

[Izuna]

So your problem is that she can't afford to go on fancy restaurant dates with you?

I can sympathize to a certain extent. I've dated people less well-off than I am and it makes things like going out to a restaurant more challenging, especially if they refuse to let you pay.

Have you considered offering to pay for dinner for these girls? Or maybe just date women of a similar age to yourself who are more financially well-off?

People have different priorities with their money. Not everyone wants to spend a lot of cash in luxurious restaurants, but there are certainly foodies out there under the age of 25, though less common since a large number are students.

Where did I say fancy? Girl states she lives a certain place in China Town, I suggest to eat there, it's a plan, then days later I get a "I'm broke ;( -- see you at Uni instead". It's the date itself I wanted to go on. I don't see how that's weird. Would have been like £13 tops.

But as for paying, I would if it was expected in the moment but I don't feel like discussing that prior to the date. I've done that before and it's not a good feeling.

--

As for the prior post about Theresa May being a cockblock, that's a different girl. The one I saw on the bus, we're talking about how she has literally no time to stay because her course is over. Our PM (when she was home secretary) basically got rid of the 1 year grace period for finding work in the UK after graduating.

A shame too because... well you know, she'd extra fine and all

 

[Xun]

I was meant to have a date tonight but the girl couldn't make it (it's been rearranged for next week though) and now it's looking likely I won't be able to make tomorrows date since I'm starting to feel a bit iffy.

Ironically I'm fine whereas she isn't.

Another date cancelled... :/

 

[WolfeTone]

Where did I say fancy? Girl states she lives a certain place in China Town, I suggest to eat there, it's a plan, then days later I get a "I'm broke ;( -- see you at Uni instead". It's the date itself I wanted to go on. I don't see how that's weird. Would have been like £13 tops.

But as for paying, I would if it was expected in the moment but I don't feel like discussing that prior to the date. I've done that before and it's not a good feeling.

--

As for the prior post about Theresa May being a cockblock, that's a different girl. The one I saw on the bus, we're talking about how she has literally no time to stay because her course is over. Our PM (when she was home secretary) basically got rid of the 1 year grace period for finding work in the UK after graduating.

A shame too because... well you know, she'd extra fine and all

Well you said in your previous post:

Trendy dates or restaurant dates tell me if there's a certain level of sophistication I'm used to. I suppose that sounds pretentious, and it is, but after dating the same person for so long, I know that's what I'd like.

I'll have to wait until I'm 25 and in a professional workplace (here's hoping). Restaurants dates shouldn't be only for the rich goddamnit.

If you're going to trendy places and you're worried about sounding pretentious, that to me implies that you're talking about places a bit fancier than Pizza Express.

£13 isn't an insignificant amount of money to some people. Especially students. The girl still wanted to go on a date with you so maybe you just need to be more accommodating of the wants and needs of the people you're dating.

The UK's recent steps towards curbing immigration are quite disgusting. Like you said, no one can help you there sadly.

 

[Izuna]

Well you said in your previous post:



If you're going to trendy places and you're worried about sounding pretentious, that to me implies that you're talking about places a bit fancier than Pizza Express.

£13 isn't an insignificant amount of money to some people. Especially students. The girl still wanted to go on a date with you so maybe you just need to be more accommodating of the wants and needs of the people you're dating.

The UK's recent steps towards curbing immigration are quite disgusting. Like you said, no one can help you there sadly.

Eh, I think Trendy can also refer to stuff like Monmouth coffee shops etc.

Nah, I don't have an obligation to do on other dates with her. I wanted to try out this Thai place she raved about. To be blunt, sex/drinking are far down my list of activities I'd like to do with my limited time.

I distinctly remember once where a girl met up, we were meant to try out a place, and she just wanted to get back to a place and fuck. The mood wasn't set at all. I don't know, perhaps that's feminine.

 

[ZackieChan]

I think we're back to you wanting friends, not dates.

 

[War Peaceman]

Eh, I think Trendy can also refer to stuff like Monmouth coffee shops etc.

Nah, I don't have an obligation to do on other dates with her. I wanted to try out this Thai place she raved about. To be blunt, sex/drinking are far down my list of activities I'd like to do with my limited time.

I distinctly remember once where a girl met up, we were meant to try out a place, and she just wanted to get back to a place and fuck. The mood wasn't set at all. I don't know, perhaps that's feminine.

be how you want to be, but damn you are so uptight

 

[LucidMomentum]

Ironically I'm fine whereas she isn't.

Another date cancelled... :/

Cancelled, or rescheduled?

Cancelled is a bit of a bummer but it happens. Unless she wanted you to make a move and reinitiate.

Rescheduled means she's still down just not right now.

Also Izuna, man if someone wants to have some fun and the mood / plan changes, sometimes you should go with it. It's not like a date or get together has gone "wrong" if it's not what you originally planned. Happens all the time.

I think we're back to you wanting friends, not dates.

I want both lol. Preferably dates and / or friends end up with some fooling around, instead of the kind of awkward dates with friends I've been having lately. Which leads to:

Aight y'all, I'm in a weird situation at the moment.

There's this girl, she's a bit older than me by a few years but that doesn't matter to me. I asked her out and she told me that she really hasn't dated anyone but she's still pining for a guy that turned her down when she asked him out, so she didn't want to date right now as she felt it would be wrong to if she still had feelings for the other guy.

But, we've been hanging out a lot more since I asked her out. We've been talking and getting food and going out, this week it's going to end up being 4-5 times we have something planned together, but a couple of those times are group events she invited me to.

Part of me is stoked cause I wouldn't have asked her out if I didn't want to get to know her better and hang out more, but at the same time telling a guy "not right now" and then having him around all the time is a great way to get me to catch feelings.

I want to think she's being sincere since her friends told me she's pretty clueless about relationships but all the same I'm trying to figure out a good balance of hanging out and having fun while not seeming desperate and totally removing the option of taking things further down the line.

I told her if she's not ready right now that's cool, but I wasn't going to turn down dates with other people in the future in the meantime and she understood. But as a dude I know I've got way less prospects than she does, even if she can't tell when a guy is trying to hit on her or ask her out unless they do it bluntly. So of course I'm thirsty.

Ah well, I probably just needed to vent. It seems like I just don't want to tell myself I'll be holding an L in terms of us ever getting past that friends area, even though she's my kind of cute and we connect on a lot of things. I'll just have to see if I'm content with that and if not I'll have to be honest with her and see where things go.

TL;DR: Anybody ask someone out, get the "not right now" response, yet still get offers to hang out, even one on one? How'd that go? Ever turn into anything more than friends?

 

[WolfeTone]

Eh, I think Trendy can also refer to stuff like Monmouth coffee shops etc.

Nah, I don't have an obligation to do on other dates with her. I wanted to try out this Thai place she raved about. To be blunt, sex/drinking are far down my list of activities I'd like to do with my limited time.

I distinctly remember once where a girl met up, we were meant to try out a place, and she just wanted to get back to a place and fuck. The mood wasn't set at all. I don't know, perhaps that's feminine.

I'm not commenting on what you want from these relationships since that's not what you're asking about, but as to your actual issue I'm not really sure what to say.

You proposed an option for a date and the girl said she'd prefer to do something else. I'm sorry that not everyone has the same tastes as you or has enough money to go to the same places as you.

It sounds like you just want someone to accompany you to places that you want to go to and you don't really care about what they want to do or what their budget might be. Like you care more about going to a particular restaurant than you do about actually hanging out with the person.

 

[Izuna]

I'm not commenting on what you want from these relationships since that's not what you're asking about, but as to your actual issue I'm not really sure what to say.

You proposed an option for a date and the girl said she'd prefer to do something else. I'm sorry that not everyone has the same tastes as you or has enough money to go to the same places as you.

It sounds like you just want someone to accompany you to places that you want to go to and you don't really care about what they want to do or what their budget might be. Like you care more about going to a particular restaurant than you do about actually hanging out with the person.

Just (to paraphrase)

"Yo so like I'm new in these parts."

"There's this place I love eating at."

"Cool let's go there?"

"Really? Cool *gives facebook and phone number??1?*"

"Monday cool then?"

"Yeah."

"It's Monday, where you at?"

*send a shit ton of voice messages apologising, explaining why she's broke, how broke she is, how once she ain't we'll go*

"K.. cool... no worries."

~

A lot of people, especially students, are broke af, and I'm merely venting about how that sucks. Hence my point where restaurant dates etc. shouldn't be for the "rich" or, uh, middle class students. It's a shame, really.

 

[gwailo]

Eh, I think Trendy can also refer to stuff like Monmouth coffee shops etc.

Nah, I don't have an obligation to do on other dates with her. I wanted to try out this Thai place she raved about. To be blunt, sex/drinking are far down my list of activities I'd like to do with my limited time.

I distinctly remember once where a girl met up, we were meant to try out a place, and she just wanted to get back to a place and fuck. The mood wasn't set at all. I don't know, perhaps that's feminine.

I still really don't get what you're asking. You're dating people in college and/or in their mid 20s. You can't expect them to want to jump into something serious right off the bat. That sort of mindset is going to be off-putting to most people no matter the age and is putting too much pressure on you to find the "perfect" woman and have the "perfect" date. Relax and roll with the punches a bit.

Also you can find cheaper alternatives for restaurants, even fancier ones. Groupon, happy hours, weekdays, lunches, etc. Or maybe try to think outside the box and do something other than going out to eat. I get that you like to do that but part of dating is being open to experiences and trying new things.

Expecting people to pay $25 for a meal in college is a lot. That would be my budget for a week of food. Some women don't want the guy to pick up the tab because it creates an environment where they feel like the "owe" something and need to pay it back via sex. Also a "fancier" dinner for the first date escalates things.

TL;DR: Anybody ask someone out, get the "not right now" response, yet still get offers to hang out, even one on one? How'd that go? Ever turn into anything more than friends?

She turned you down because has feelings for someone that turned her down. Just think on that. It's not going to end in a healthy relationship (romantic or otherwise) for you.

 

[Izuna]

I still really don't get what you're asking. You're dating people in college and/or in their mid 20s. You can't expect them to want to jump into something serious right off the bat. That sort of mindset is going to be off-putting to most people no matter the age and is putting too much pressure on you to find the "perfect" woman and have the "perfect" date. Relax and roll with the punches a bit.

Also you can find cheaper alternatives for restaurants, even fancier ones. Groupon, happy hours, weekdays, lunches, etc. Or maybe try to think outside the box and do something other than going out to eat. I get that you like to do that but part of dating is being open to experiences and trying new things.

I really don't understand some responses in this thread, I guess. Restaurant dates are dope and I'm venting about how it's not for everyone because people are priced out of them. I don't see that has anything to do with being serious etc. I'm not saying anything about how I need to be with a person that does that.

I guess there's some implication with posting in this thread that I have to be soul-mate searching or relationship hunting. It's called dating-age and I posted about dates being expensive. Or is this actually relationship-age

meh, nevermind I guess

I don't see how £13 = $25 but whatevs.

 

[ZackieChan]

I'm not commenting on what you want from these relationships since that's not what you're asking about, but as to your actual issue I'm not really sure what to say.

You proposed an option for a date and the girl said she'd prefer to do something else. I'm sorry that not everyone has the same tastes as you or has enough money to go to the same places as you.

It sounds like you just want someone to accompany you to places that you want to go to and you don't really care about what they want to do or what their budget might be. Like you care more about going to a particular restaurant than you do about actually hanging out with the person.

I should link to his thread where he was sad that someone watched Inside Out without him.

Just (to paraphrase)

"Yo so like I'm new in these parts."

"There's this place I love eating at."

"Cool let's go there?"

"Really? Cool *gives facebook and phone number??1?*"

"Monday cool then?"

"Yeah."

"It's Monday, where you at?"

*send a shit ton of voice messages apologising, explaining why she's broke, how broke she is, how once she ain't we'll go*

"K.. cool... no worries."

~

A lot of people, especially students, are broke af, and I'm merely venting about how that sucks. Hence my point where restaurant dates etc. shouldn't be for the "rich" or, uh, middle class students. It's a shame, really.

I'm sure there was a better way to handle all of this and offer alternatives. But I don't think you want alternatives. You want the dating world to bend to your desires, but it isn't going to.

 

[LucidMomentum]

I
She turned you down because has feelings for someone that turned her down. Just think on that. It's not going to end in a healthy relationship (romantic or otherwise) for you.

Yeah true. I'll probably let this week run its course, since we're going to a couple parties and LCS Worlds Grand Finals this weekend, then take a step back.

If she works her stuff out then we'll see what happens. But I shouldn't be trying to force it or thinking about it as much as I am.

She's still a cool person so I'm down to hang out but I shouldn't see it as anything more until told otherwise.

 

[WolfeTone]

I really don't understand some responses in this thread, I guess. Restaurant dates are dope and I'm venting about how it's not for everyone because people are priced out of them. I don't see that has anything to do with being serious etc. I'm not saying anything about how I need to be with a person that does that.

I guess there's some implication with posting in this thread that I have to be soul-mate searching or relationship hunting. It's called dating-age and I posted about dates being expensive. Or is this actually relationship-age

meh, nevermind I guess

I don't see how £13 = $25 but whatevs.

Okay now that's it's obvious that you're just venting about expensive restaurants and low incomes and don't want actual solutions or alternatives, that's fine, I won't give you any further advice on this.

There's no implication that you have to be looking for a soul mate here. It's fine if you don't want to pursue anything romantic or sexual with the people you're dating, but you need to realize that the vast majority of people who are dating are looking for those things. You need to inform the people you date that you're not looking for casual sex/a relationship/whatever. Tell people what you want from them.

I seem to remember a while back you had a problem where you wanted to ask girls out as friends but they interpreted it as a romantic date. Just be upfront with your intentions. Tell them you just want friendship.

 

[Izuna]

I should link to his thread where he was sad that someone watched Inside Out without him.

Ah, well we ended up watching it together and it was awesome

Spoiler

is the facetiousness not implied in any of these events though?

I seem to remember a while back you had a problem where you wanted to ask girls out as friends but they interpreted it as a romantic date. Just be upfront with your intentions. Tell them you just want friendship.

I dunno, it just felt like a thread where I could vent about dating woes. It doesn't have to be me asking for advice does it?

"I'm not looking for a relationship right now" is my go to, that I drop in casual conversation. Things are great these days anyway. I just miss restaurant dates in general.

 

[RoaringMdog]

I have a first date tomorrow, for the first time in over 3 years, and i'm starting to get pretty nervous. I'm meeting her at the mall, and at this point i'm trying to decide where to take her, i was thinking about taking her to this cute little patisserie, where we could get something warm to drink(since we're meeting at night, and it will be cold) and get a pastry or something. And since it's not a loud place, i thought it would be a good place to talk. But now i'm starting to think we should just go to a cafe/bar place near that area. What should i do? I've never really gone out on a first date like this before, so this is all new to me x.x

 

[WolfeTone]

I have a first date tomorrow, for the first time in over 3 years, and i'm starting to get pretty nervous. I'm meeting her at the mall, and at this point i'm trying to decide where to take her, i was thinking about taking her to this cute little patisserie, where we could get something warm to drink(since we're meeting at night, and it will be cold) and get a pastry or something. And since it's not a loud place, i thought it would be a good place to talk. But now i'm starting to think we should just go to a cafe/bar place near that area. What should i do? I've never really gone out on a first date like this before, so this is all new to me x.x

Don't sweat it, it's normal to be nervous. This girl wants to meet you. She already likes you at least a little bit and she's likely nervous too.

The patisserie sounds like a really nice idea. Make sure you check the opening hours to see if it's open at night. Meet her at a central place in the mall and then walk to the patisserie together so you can chat on the way.

If the date goes well and you'd like to continue, you could always move on to the bar afterwards.

Ah, well we ended up watching it together and it was awesome

Spoiler

is the facetiousness not implied in any of these events though?

I dunno, it just felt like a thread where I could vent about dating woes. It doesn't have to be me asking for advice does it?

"I'm not looking for a relationship right now" is my go to, that I drop in casual conversation. Things are great these days anyway. I just miss restaurant dates in general.

Venting is fine, I just interpreted your original comment as looking for advice.

Saying that you're not looking for a relationship right now implies that you want just sex to the vast majority of people. Like if someone asked me out and said they don't want a relationship, I'd assume they just want sex. If you ask someone out and state directly that it's as a friend, that's a different story.

 

[gwailo]

I really don't understand some responses in this thread, I guess. Restaurant dates are dope and I'm venting about how it's not for everyone because people are priced out of them. I don't see that has anything to do with being serious etc. I'm not saying anything about how I need to be with a person that does that.

I guess there's some implication with posting in this thread that I have to be soul-mate searching or relationship hunting. It's called dating-age and I posted about dates being expensive. Or is this actually relationship-age

meh, nevermind I guess

I don't see how £13 = $25 but whatevs.

Sorry, I forgot how the pound has tanked. But $15 is still a good deal of money for college students and also the time commitment is a lot for some people, which make for a more "serious" date. When I was in school, dates were meeting for coffee/drinks, maybe go to a little café or for a pizza slice or burger. Going to a sit down restaurant (even something like Chilis or Applebee's) was for people that you were more serious with.

Anyway all of that is for (from what I gather) is supposedly for a friendship that doesn't involve romance or sex? You're trying to fit a square peg into a round hole here. There are groups that do meet up for dinners around cities, maybe try something like that. Otherwise go to the restaurants you want to, sit at the bar and eat and strike up conversations with the people around you.

Your excuse that you can't date (or even find people to hang out with, or whatever the hell it is that you're looking for) because no one can afford to go to the places you want frankly comes off as pompous and condescending.

 

[Salamando]

Now for something completely different...

Met this girl on a fetish social site. She was a sub who expressed interest in petplay, among other things. Found out she lives an hour away, so we exchanged numbers and have been texting much of the past week. Then came the warning signs.

Warning sign 1: texting. She texts me constantly. Morning, day, and night. 5-6 hours a day girl has nothing on her. Warning sign 2: for the first meet, I suggested coffee, she wanted dinner. After acquiescing to dinner, she then pushed for Haunted Amusement Park tickets. This $5 cup of coffee date became a $30 dinner date, and she's pushing for an extra $60 in park tickets. Hell-to-the-no.

Then I find out her version of petplay is drastically different from mine. For those unfamiliar, petplay is a form of sexual roleplay, where one person pretends to be the owner and the other pretends to be a pet. She strips the sexual element right out of it. Think less sexy cat, more actual cat - total dependence, no nudity, just wants petted and food. And happens-to-be-expensive custom collar, ears, and tail. If I wanted to date a cat...I have an actual cat...

 

[Izuna]

Sorry, I forgot how the pound has tanked. But $15 is still a good deal of money for college students and also the time commitment is a lot for some people, which make for a more "serious" date. When I was in school, dates were meeting for coffee/drinks, maybe go to a little café or for a pizza slice or burger. Going to a sit down restaurant (even something like Chilis or Applebee's) was for people that you were more serious with.

Anyway all of that is for (from what I gather) is supposedly for a friendship that doesn't involve romance or sex? You're trying to fit a square peg into a round hole here. There are groups that do meet up for dinners around cities, maybe try something like that. Otherwise go to the restaurants you want to, sit at the bar and eat and strike up conversations with the people around you.

Your excuse that you can't date (or even find people to hang out with, or whatever the hell it is that you're looking for) because no one can afford to go to the places you want frankly comes off as pompous and condescending.

That, pretty much. It's going well though I've made a few connections already.

I'm also broke af, so I fully understand it, I just miss it. It was one of the best things with being in my last relationship was the "food-seeing" of it all. I guess I'm not in the right place in life to look for a foodie buddy, but maybe there's a site for that.

 

[Llyranor]

I get where Cobalt is coming from. Having a foodie SO and trying out new restaurants is great. But, I still wouldn't do restaurant first dates (only as a backup after tea/coffee if things go well)

I suggested coffee, she wanted dinner.

Hook her up with Cobalt

 

[Izuna]

I guess dinner dates is an old-fashioned thing. I been on coffee shop dates (similar imo), but only did a "dine" date with one friend and one prospective partner. Both were the dopest of them all.

 

[Xun]

Cancelled, or rescheduled?

Cancelled is a bit of a bummer but it happens. Unless she wanted you to make a move and reinitiate.

Rescheduled means she's still down just not right now.

Both dates have been rescheduled.

It's not a massive issue of course, but still a bit annoying since next week is likely to be jam packed now...

 

[Salamando]

I guess dinner dates is an old-fashioned thing. I been on coffee shop dates (similar imo), but only did a "dine" date with one friend and one prospective partner. Both were the dopest of them all.

I love dinner dates. But never with a girl I don't know all that well. This means girls I just met or girls I'm meeting through online dating.

Coffee or drinks lend themselves far better to conversation, are cheaper, can be ended at a moments notice if the girl is a Trump supporter, can be extended via walks to places with dinner (or no where at all), and are non-committal. For all of those reasons, they make excellent places to start a date.

 

[ZackieChan]

I get where Cobalt is coming from. Having a foodie SO and trying out new restaurants is great. But, I still wouldn't do restaurant first dates (only as a backup after tea/coffee if things go well)

Hook her up with Cobalt

A dinner of Meow Mix. I'm sure there's a trendy place that serves that...

 

[LucidMomentum]

Both dates have been rescheduled.

It's not a massive issue of course, but still a bit annoying since next week is likely to be jam packed now...

Get it, fam.

Have fun and have a busy week!

I've had dates just get cancelled cause they were busy, then I got ghosted.

Sucks but it is what it is.

 

[Salamando]

A dinner of Meow Mix. I'm sure there's a trendy place that serves that...

No, that would be ludicrous!

Spoiler

She wanted me to have two bowls on the floor. One with chocolate milk, the other with chocolate cereal...

 

[hydrophilic attack]

So I think I've fucked up my chances with this girl at work. I don't dare to be aggressive, in case I'm misunderstanding things, and end up doing too little. I asked her out for a picnic a couple of weeks ago, which went pretty well though I didn't really make any physical advances. Then invited her to a party, where we were all having fun. We all went out together afterwards and she sat down next to me and pushed her legs against mine. That's where I should have made a move, but didn't.

I mean, being cautious is well and good when it's someone at work, but I'm going abroad for a few weeks next week, and any chances I had will be gone after that. She is super attractive too, so I'm sure she has lots of guys going after her. Will have to work all weekend so I won't be able to ask her out for this weekend

 

[ZackieChan]

So I think I've fucked up my chances with this girl at work. I don't dare to be aggressive, in case I'm misunderstanding things, and end up doing too little. I asked her out for a picnic a couple of weeks ago, which went pretty well though I didn't really make any physical advances. Then invited her to a party, where we were all having fun. We all went out together afterwards and she sat down next to me and pushed her legs against mine. That's where I should have made a move, but didn't.

I mean, being cautious is well and good when it's someone at work, but I'm going abroad for a few weeks next week, and any chances I had will be gone after that. She is super attractive too, so I'm sure she has lots of guys going after her. Will have to work all weekend so I won't be able to ask her out for this weekend

Lesson learned, I guess. Why didn't you make any moves? Afraid, or maybe you've been reading too much Gaf?

 

[hydrophilic attack]

Lesson learned, I guess. Why didn't you make any moves? Afraid, or maybe you've been reading too much Gaf?

Because I'm shy as fuck.

And if I had misread things, that would have been straight up sexual harassment. Not that I'd be afraid of losing my job or anything because I probably wouldn't, but you hear so much about what women go through, and with the Trump stuff in the news, I don't want to be the kind of guy that contributes to such a climate for women on the off-chance I was misreading things

 

[names2hard4you]

So I think I've fucked up my chances with this girl at work. I don't dare to be aggressive, in case I'm misunderstanding things, and end up doing too little. I asked her out for a picnic a couple of weeks ago, which went pretty well though I didn't really make any physical advances. Then invited her to a party, where we were all having fun. We all went out together afterwards and she sat down next to me and pushed her legs against mine. That's where I should have made a move, but didn't.

I mean, being cautious is well and good when it's someone at work, but I'm going abroad for a few weeks next week, and any chances I had will be gone after that. She is super attractive too, so I'm sure she has lots of guys going after her. Will have to work all weekend so I won't be able to ask her out for this weekend

So... What makes you think it's over? I mean sure you took your time, but unless I'm misunderstanding she hasn't rejected you. Tell her you you would love to take her out on a date after you return. If she says no, or if she is already seeing someone else, you move on.

 

[hydrophilic attack]

So... What makes you think it's over? I mean sure you took your time, but unless I'm misunderstanding she hasn't rejected you. Tell her you you would love to take her out on a date after you return. If she says no, or if she is already seeing someone else, you move on.

The story of my dating life is basically I snooze and lose. I've done this before. I'm starting to recognize the signs that she's losing interest.

I should do what you tell me. I hope I get a moment on my own with her so I can be a bit more up-front with my intentions. (Don't want people talking.) Texting her is weak but I guess if it comes to that, it's better than doing nothing

 

[Llyranor]

You create those moments. You don't just hope they fall in your lap.

 

[hydrophilic attack]

You create those moments. You don't just hope they fall in your lap.

how

 

[names2hard4you]

The story of my dating life is basically I snooze and lose. I've done this before. I'm starting to recognize the signs that she's losing interest.

I should do what you tell me. I hope I get a moment on my own with her so I can be a bit more up-front with my intentions. (Don't want people talking.) Texting her is weak but I guess if it comes to that, it's better than doing nothing

Doing something is the first step. It's fine to shoot a text if you feel more comfortable that way, and if it's more convenient. If you wanna make it happen use all the means at your disposal to make it happen. Doing it at work isn't a good idea and you may not be able to set the time aside to see her.

 

[Lulubop]

No, that would be ludicrous!

Spoiler

She wanted me to have two bowls on the floor. One with chocolate milk, the other with chocolate cereal...

can cats even have chocolate?

 

[Salamando]

can cats even have chocolate?

Chocolate is toxic to cats and they're lactose intolerant. It's not the most accurate portrayal of a cat.

Formally ended things with her (read: ghosted). At no point in texting should the word "diapers" ever be used. EVER.

 

[gaiages]

can cats even have chocolate?

No, they can't, lol, that's the worst part.

 

[LucidMomentum]

Formally ended things with her (read: ghosted). At no point in texting should the word "diapers" ever be used. EVER.

Lmao. Don't ghost her, just tell her you ain't into that level of kink. She'll either understand and walk it back, or it'll be over.

No, they can't, lol, that's the worst part.

SMH, like all fetishes have to be scientifically accurate.