Dating-Age |OT3| Positivity, Confidence, and Not Being a "Nice" Guy
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Disappointment is a big part of life for pretty much everyone though...
Its not really a parking lot. Its in the middle of nowhere on the "parking space" on a baseball field nowhere near the main road, lol
Bucket-o-roadkill
Member
Disappointment is fair enough, but 11 first date rejections in like 7 months? Fuck this, it's more than disappointment, its totally soul destroying. To be fair, I think I need to try sites other than plenty of fish. The population is great on there, but the type of people on there isn't. Pof is like a massive club which attracts loads of people that you know are a bit rough around the edges. I need to find a site which is more like a nice pub.
I'd say it comes down to whether or not you want to spend so much time chasing women. Or would you prefer to live your own exciting life with women chasing you because you have so much to offer them? The whole mindset of "oh how can I please her, what can I offer her so she'll like me?" etc etc is so unhealthy. The particular phrasing could be done better perhaps but the overall message is sound imho. Yeah, she might not ever call you but why be hung up over this one girl anyway? If she doesn't call, you know she's not interested and you can move on without becoming over invested (which a lot of guys become very fast, especially if they chase the girl). If you have a great life of your own and you're talking to 10 different girls, one of them not calling you won't be that big of a deal, right? IF she does call though, you're supposed to already have an extraordinary life that the only respons can be "yeah I might be available to this or that on day X or Y". If you suggest an activity on day X or Y, you're almost asking for her permission and it all comes down to if she is available or not, and that's rarely an attractive trait in a man. And regular dates are done to death! Be the kind of man who do things differently.I'd want to see this question answered
Long answer to such a simple question xD
Bit late on that one. Next time.
Tonights summary:
Had two hawt ladies laughing and entertained for 90mins when I have a private chat with the one only to find out she has a boyfriend. :/
Talk to another three ladies for half-an-hour and had them entertained but gracefully backed out when I discovered one was seventeen and rest barely older (I'm 28).
Checked out a new place later on but nothing to report. Had grub. Spent one hour in cab line. :/
Considering online dating alongside my Friday/Saturday escapades to cover all bases.
Tonights summary:
Had two hawt ladies laughing and entertained for 90mins when I have a private chat with the one only to find out she has a boyfriend. :/
Talk to another three ladies for half-an-hour and had them entertained but gracefully backed out when I discovered one was seventeen and rest barely older (I'm 28).
Checked out a new place later on but nothing to report. Had grub. Spent one hour in cab line. :/
Considering online dating alongside my Friday/Saturday escapades to cover all bases.
Update: Had a blast last night. Apparenty my sister missed the memo and only invited taken friends. One of the hot ones ended up flirting with me the whole night. Nothing happened since she had a boyfriend but it was a huge confidence boost and nice to know that I can still talk/flirt with the ladies.
Got to become better at that. The other weekend I was just a few minutes into conversation when I asked the group 'where are all your boyfriends?'. They said that all three were single and an hour later I had a number and a planned date (that didn't happen).
Scary fact(?): chicks who have been with their boyfriends for 3+ years are easier to pickup for one-night-stands than single ones. They are not looking for a relationship, not guarded, obviously sexually active / know what they want, no commitment / phonenumbers. I don't condone but apparently that's the lay of the land.
TurboLibre
Member
Managed to go on a date earlier this week. We ended up chatting over drinks for almost three hours and she was excited to set something up for next week. We had a lot in common and she even paid for the entire date, I had to fight to at least throw down for the tip. I'm very slow at warming up to people, but I am seeing some hope here. Guess I'll see how next week pans out.
You just got out of a 4 year relationship or something right? Damn, impressive that you can go so soon. Good job
ThisWreckage
Banned
I make a concentrated effort to bring up a potential boyfriend within 15 minutes of meeting a girl. You'll save a lot of time by doing this.
On another note, I've completely given up on dating. I am absolutely defeated. I'm not going to lower my standards just so I can date someone. I've got too much pride and self esteem to do such a thing.
shanshan310
Member
I'd want to see this question answered
Depends on the context. If its some one you've just met, I'd say organising to meet up with them is kiiinda over the top. It might be seen as pushy, even if you've discovered similar interests (eg. You both want to see TDKR). Better idea is to say, "well, if you're up for seeing batman sometime soon, give me a ring!". Probably no more specific than that, since people need time to mull over the offer. You don't want to put them on the spot - if you make them uncomfortable, chances are 'maybe' will turn into a 'no'.
NeOak
Member
Poor Chinner.
They haven't proven me wrong so I guess I'm just unlucky.
I'd want to see this question answered
you only give your number in a social context
i.e. "I'm going to this party.....shoot me a text if you wanna come by" then she either gets out or her phone or not.
don't force your number on a woman
Sub_Level
wants to fuck an Asian grill.
Yeah, that's what I did. She approached me first for help in the class we're taking. Had a study session and gave her my number in case she needed more help.
She hasn't called or texted since the test we took on Friday, though.
Oh well :\
I don't feel too bad about it since she has three kids, is more than a decade older than me, and I'm 21 but still lol. Guess we'll see what Monday holds...
Yeah, going out with my friends during the weekend is the easy part. Figuring out how to entertain myself during the week is another story.
Well if she has three kids, she's bound to be very busy so it might not mean anything. You're still young as you say, you're obviously approachable and if you'll keep doig what you're doing, more and more of them will start contacting you and you won't spend so much time worrying over a single one of them.
You should be concerned that you didn't bring a condom with you.
Etrian Oddity
Member
Without a doubt they are, although I'm not sure why.
Perhaps they're naturally flirty, and that's how they got a man in the first place. Or, perhaps they've let their guard down and allow themselves to flirt because they already have a man and are at ease.
Who knows....
People in this thread are surprised that ladies who have boyfriends AND go to clubs are prone to cheating? LOL, who could have thought?!
A lady who have a boyfriend AND don't want to cheat just don't go to clubs alone. All girls you see there are spoiled in that regard. Don't judge all females by the breed you see at clubs.
A lady who have a boyfriend AND don't want to cheat just don't go to clubs alone. All girls you see there are spoiled in that regard. Don't judge all females by the breed you see at clubs.
The Anti-Monitor
Banned
Excuse me?
excuse what?
may be the wrong (and a bit strong) word - I meant they have a predisposition to being not so monogamous.
Hypereides
Member
Here we go again... this thread is going places.
Yeah, better send a chaperone with your woman when she leaves the house by herself. You send her to go pick up a pizza, next thing you know she's coming back with dick
Which is basically why girls aren't allowed to drive in places like Saudi Arabia.
Vermillion
Banned
Round 29, fight
oh c'mon. Of course you should trust each other blah-blah-blah but if you are letting your girl a)go to vacation alone b)visit nightclubs alone on a regular basis then be ready that people can get caught in a moment no matter how strong your relationship is. Such is human nature, there is nothing bad about that. You can either admit that your SO may cheat on you and let is slide because you can't lock her up or you can try to lock her up. There is no other way.
I've only been in two serious relationships, first one cheated on me, but we broke up friendly enough, second one when she cheated on me the first time I decided to try and make it work, second time I had to leave town to look after my parents' house for them. I was gone for a month, she spent the whole time cheating on me with some eighteen year old kid in my bed. It's pretty discouraging, but how am I ever supposed to find a real companion if I just decide everyone is going to do that to me?
Again there is nothing bad about cheating IMO, it's sort of natural for many humans but a person can be on the far side of the spectrum like almost totally monogamous. This person will have a certain lifestyle not suitable for cheating like working a lot and spending all their remaining time with their SO and/or children. These people won't cheat not only because they don't want it that much but just because they have no time. Stick to such person and live a happy life.
if this was adressed to me that it's all the same. Everything can happen.
That was pretty good.
Probably a combination. Some might be testing the waters, and some are probably just very social creatures. It's probably like you say, they let their guard down and they are just their to relax and have fun. Single people are probably in general at clubs with other intentions as well as "just having fun", should the occasion arise, unlike the taken ones.
By alone, do you mean *alone* alone, or with friends/without their SO? I know quite a few girls who go out together without their man to dance with strangers and have a good time, and they're not cheating (afaik). I don't think I've ever seen a girl, single or taken, out completely alone.
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