wcw2001.tumblr.com
WCW Monday Nitro 1/15/2001
Shit got weird at Sin. A fan pepper spray Goldberg and now Goldberg is fired. Sid exploded his leg and Animal was the mystery man. A ref put his hand in the front of Shane Douglas' tights.
TO THE EXCLUSIVE FOOTAGE. Ric Flair celebrated with Totally Buffed, Animal, Jarrett, and Steiner after Sin.
We start out with Tony and Scott being upset and sad that they got SWERVED and WORKED. Then they show slow mo replays of Sid's leg breaking. FUCK. They really needed to zoom in and slow mo that shit? Fucking gross. Just hideous. No pictures or gifs of that.
Totally Buffed come out in suits. Former R&B Security bring out a coffin. This is for Goldberg's career. Inside the coffin is a spear, a jackhammer, and Goldberg's book. That's actually pretty funny. In typical WCW fashion, this starts out good and then goes on way too long until it becomes terrible. They say some words about Bill and ask if anyone else has anything to say. Out comes Jeff Jarrett. He brings his guitar to a funeral in lieu of flowers. Jeff has his Owen voice on. Jeff says Bill never beat him. They bring out Scott Steiner. The funeral dirge has been playing for 12 minutes now. Scott says there will be no rematch with Sid. No shit. He and Midajah spit in the coffin. Goldberg's music hits, but Flair and Animal come out of the locker room.
A full 15 minutes into this, they take a break and come back. Why did Ric Flair turn heel? How does that make sense at all after the past 3 months of him in charge? Ric says this is the greatest collection of the greatest wrestlers in wrestling HISTORY. There is not a single person in the ring besides Ric Flair that can be considered great. I mean, I like Scott Steiner and Lex was good pre-WWF, and Jeff was a dependable mid card guy, but none of them are excellent let alone the greatest collection of all time. "Big Poppa Pump gonna tear her up after the show!" Now they have 2 large heel stables. But one is old guys and one is rookies. As CEO, it seems to me that purposely screwing Booker, Sting, and Goldberg and having them injured or retired are terrible business decisions. Flair is just rambling and not even making sense anymore. It's like a TNA promo. Kevin Nash comes out. Jesus Christ, this is 22 minutes in of this shit. Is Russo booking this? He's not on Flair's team. He's literally going to kill Steiner and Flair tonight. DDP also comes out. And Rick Steiner! Now Cat is out. He books Nash and Steiner tonight. This went 26 minutes without the commercial break. Fuck.
TO THE BACK. The Magnificent 7 talk with Crowbar and Daffney. Crowbar can't join the group. Flair wants him on the team.
Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs Crowbar WCW Cruiserweight Championship
Only a half hour into the show before a match happens. Crowbar is clearly over the weight limit, but he was a Cruiserweight Champion during 2000. Chavo had a great plancha once upon a time. ADR does it best now. Chavo has a lot of flashy and high flying offense for a heel. I feel like Crowbar showed he could be higher up than the CW division. I think he should be bumped up to the US Championship level. He definitely flipped the switch in the last month or so of 2000 when they let him cut real promos. Crowbar tries to backdrop Chavo over the top, but Chavo just bounces off the rope. It was hilarious. Crowbar could have won the match, but decides to get a chair. Didn't work out for him. Chavo retains with the brainbuster.
TO THE BACK. Totally Buffed talk with Bam Bam. They want him to join. He's in. This group is getting worse by the segment.
2 Count vs Filthy Animals
I see the bookers learned that after 25 minutes of old dudes talking, it'd be a good idea to have two matches with fast, young guys in a row. This is pretty much a Texas Tornado match. They've all been in the ring going full pace spot after spot. Dive sequence ends with Shane doing his frog splash cross body. Shannon got back dropped off the apron over the post. Super rana from Kidman gets 2. Sugar Smack! Terrible name for a superkick. Vertebreaker is reversed into a Kid Krusher. Fun full on cruiser sprint. Team Canada run out and attack the Animals. Lance challenges Kidman to face Awesome in a hair vs hair match. Really, one night of build out of nowhere for a hair match? So goofy.
TO THE BACK. Cat is talking with Kronik. They want a title shot against the Thrillers. Team Canada attack Kidman in a garage. Ric talks with Chavo. Chavo thinks things have been working out for him on his own. Sanders walks in and sits down for a chat. He didn't mean anything personal during his commissioner days. Totally Buffed try to recruit Hugh. He's speechless.
Kronik vs NBT WCW Tag Team Championships
Kronik are back to full faces again. They showed up as a team last April as heels. They turned face about a month later. They kind of turned semi-heel before going full face again. Then they turned heel around October. Now they're full faces again. The Thrillers had been wrestling less than 2 years and were clearly better than both members of Kronik who had been around over a decade at this point. Crush was trained by Fujinami and Inoki. Can you believe that shit? Those two produced Crush. And Sarge trained Wrath. Seanton Bomb put Crush out. Champs retain.
TO THE BACK. The Animals and trainer check on Kidman. Kidman can't wrestle. Konnan is going to replace Kidman. In a hair vs hair match. Konnan is bald. Hair vs Hair. A bald guy. O'Haire is mad at Meat and Jindrak for interfering in their match. Dissension in the ranks! Sanders says there is strength in honor. What?
Konnan vs Mike Awesome Hair vs Hair
Again, Konnan is bald. What does he have to lose in this match? Flair pops up on the screen and says Kidman will still get his head shaved if Konnan loses. Well, some god damn logic? On Nitro? For reals? Konnan does a pretty reckless looking top rope DDT. He was losing his balace and just pulled Awesome down. It got the win. Awesome will lose the mullet!
TO THE BACK. Chavo doesn't want to be enemies with Hugh anymore. Mike holds parts of his mullet as Lance says they will get revenge.
The Cat vs Bam Bam Big Yellow
Cat's new thing is saying he does everything for the people and he can do anything if the people support him. Oh my god, what are you doing WCW? WCW pls. Stop. Cat easily wins with the Feliner in a mercifully short match.
Shane Douglas vs General Rection WCW US Championship
They're going to have a hard time having a worse match than last night. Shane hits the Plunge, but it was more like a normal fisherman suplex. Shane had a hard time getting his chain out of his knee pad. You'd think the ref would check that specifically after the night before. Chavo hits Hugh with the chain and Shane retains. The ref KNEW something was off and weird, yet counted the fall anyway.
TO THE BACK. Tenay is with Hugh. He's sick of being General Rection and Hugh Morris and now he's going to end Chavo's career.
Scott Steiner vs Kevin Nash WCW Championship
WCW really needs Sting and Booker back. They get into it right away. I thought maybe they'd have a half hour promo first. Nash has his working boots on. He's FIIIIRRRRREEEDDDD UPPPPP. Fuck you, Mark Madden. I'm glad that fat cunt got fired. Luckily for Nash, this match was short. Nash was about to win when the rest of the 7 hit the ring. DDP, Rick, and Cat run down, but WE'RE OUTTA TIME!
This show. What the fuck. This is the new WCW? The first few shows started out promising, but this was awful. Like, as bad as anything I saw in 2000. There are so many problems. WHY on earth did Ric Flair turn heel? Why did he go to such lengths for 3 months to make Jeff and Scott's lives miserable if he was on their side the whole time? Why would the CEO who is trying to turn the company around purposely get rid of the top 3 faces and draws in a time when they desperately needed draws? Why wouldn't the higher ups at Time Warner can Flair immediately for such behavior? Why did the give him the position at all after his time as president? You know, when he actually thought he was the president of the United States and had to be institutionalized? If he's doing it for the power, that doesn't make sense since he has complete control over the company as CEO. He could have done this 3 months ago if he wanted to. Why would he build up Animal as the biggest thing ever? Does anyone give a shit about Animal without Hawk? Where was Hawk? Why would Buff be best buddies with Lex when Lex turned on Buff when he returned? Why are Jeff and Buff in the same stable when they were feuding just a few weeks ago? What about earlier in the year when Steiner repeatedly made fun of Flair and Jeff tied to end Ric's career? Or a few weeks ago when Steiner tried to permanently cripple Arn? Why is Flair trying to get more people to join the "new WCW" when every wrestler on the roster answers to him anyway? Why did that opening segment need to be a half hour long? Why in that half hour segment did no one once mentioned
why Ric Flair turned heel? Why are Cat and Bam Bam featured wrestlers? Where is Tank Abbott? Where is Kanyon? Why is Konnan in more matches suddenly? Why does Chavo half turn 3 times a week? Why would Palumbo and O'Haire suddenly be upset that the other Thrillers helped them win a match? Why have we not once been updated on Booker or Sting's injuries?
