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Football Thread 2013/2014 |OT1| Moyes, Master of Muppets

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Mr Cola

Brothas With Attitude / The Wrong Brotha to Fuck Wit / Die Brotha Die / Brothas in Paris
we all know when results turn at Christmas Terry will launch his long planned coup and take up the reigns as player manager with Ashely Cole as his assistant. Lampard moves into director of football and the legacy of Chelsea is secured.
 

GorillaJu

Member
Jose wants the United job so he will probably try really hard to beat Moyes to get him sacked.

1165wysru.gif
 
we all know when results turn at Christmas Terry will launch his long planned coup and take up the reigns as player manager with Ashely Cole as his assistant. Lampard moves into director of football and the legacy of Chelsea is secured.

We would still win the Champions League :p
 

Feorax

Member
I just pour Veet over my face.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B000KKNQBK

Make sure you read the reviews here, since apparently the packaging doesn't give you full safety instructions.

Some real tales of woe here...

Picture the scene: a badly sunburnt, blistered and shaved Boris Johnson carries two red Space Hoppers accross the surface of Mars. This is an accurrate description of the current state of my genital region 3 weeks after a liberal application of this product. Seriously, my once proud Biggles looks more like the lone equine survivor of a fire at a donkey sanctuary.

Rubbed it onto my bum crack and chocolate starfish and left it for an hour. My ringpiece now resembles the leftovers of last nights kebab. I look like I've been fisted by Dumbo. Highly recommended product.
 

Meteorain

Member
Shave everyday? I would go mad. I feel for my dad, he sometimes has to shave twice a day.

Come Friday I let the terrorist beard flow freely.
 

L1NETT

Member
No pics from our pre season, either they are behind closed doors or they have gone for a run round Bradford.

Funny story is that when McCall took them on a run a few years back Omar Daley stopped at Canal Road to go the Carphone Warehouse to upgrade his contract :p
 
I'm growing an untrimmed beard until the bar exam, about a month from now. No need to shave when I spend every day studying in my house.

After that though, I enter the real world and will probably be clean shaven every day for many years. :-( Until I get a job where I have enough swag and experience to pull off a beard.
 

GorillaJu

Member
http://www.amazon.co.uk/product-reviews/B000KKNQBK

Make sure you read the reviews here, since apparently the packaging doesn't give you full safety instructions.

Some real tales of woe here...

5.0 out of 5 stars good product, 15 April 2012
By
Dennis - See all my reviews
This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200 ml (Personal Care)
Makes my farts sound louder. The hair must have acted as a interlocking silencer.. I give this the big thumbs up. 5/5

lol
 

GorillaJu

Member
Damn I actually wanna try that Veet stuff on my junk to see just how bad it actually hurts. I'd get blowjobs every fucking night if my balls and taint were polished and squeaky like a whistle, I'm sure of it.
 

bjaelke

Member
Helenius cost £1.2m. Who got the better deal?
Cornelius definitely has the potential (to become the next Bendtner), but Cardiff did put a lot of eggs in to one basket. It's a colossal pressure to put on such a young guy. Helenius on the other hand can relax and worry less about expectations.

If we look at the talent/price ratio then Helenius might be considered the better deal.
 

Mastadon

Banned
Cornelius definitely has the potential (to become the next Bendtner), but Cardiff did put a lot of eggs in to one basket. It's a colossal pressure to put on such a young guy. Helenius on the other hand can relax and worry less about expectations.

If we look at the talent/price ratio then Helenius might be considered the better deal.

Can you produce some graphs and charts to portray the talent:cost ratio please?
 

Mr Cola

Brothas With Attitude / The Wrong Brotha to Fuck Wit / Die Brotha Die / Brothas in Paris
Thiago's been named in the Barca squad to play against some team in Norway. They play in 4 weeks time.

Well the optimist in me says of course they are giong to name him if he is still their player. Its only pre-season, if it was in the champs league squad then obviously thats a huge implication.
 

Mr Cola

Brothas With Attitude / The Wrong Brotha to Fuck Wit / Die Brotha Die / Brothas in Paris
I get excitement, but the hype surrounding Thiago is just insane. He's no Neymar, guys.

I had no idea who Thiago was until we were implicated with him, im only hyped because I like new things, signings are fun.
 
I get excitement, but the hype surrounding Thiago is just insane. He's no Neymar, guys.

It might be more to do with the fact that we have no idea how Moyes will approach signings. If we look at his Everton days he signed cheap, unspectacular but hard working players (mostly).

What he'll do at United is still unknown and to see him go for this sort of player alleviates certain reservations I have about him and the sort of game he wants to play at United.
 

Mr Cola

Brothas With Attitude / The Wrong Brotha to Fuck Wit / Die Brotha Die / Brothas in Paris
Speaking of AC Milan/Brazilian talents what happened to Pato? I remember him being called the "Second coming", hyped almost as much as one Freddy Adu, and similarly I havent heard of him in years.
 

GorillaJu

Member
Wait, what? Don't you have Kagawa? But I must admit, at first glance your midfield looks improvable. What happened to Nani? He used to be good, didn't he? Why not try and snatch some young talents from Dortmund?

Kagawa is more of a forward than a midfielder. Our midfield is a fucking disaster to be honest. Our best midfielder is on the wrong side of 30, and was never that amazing to begin with, though he was good last year. Other United fans hype up Tom Cleverley like the only good things he does aren't total accidents (they are), but I know better than that. Nani has hypoprosexia, the only thing he can keep his attention on is the shape of his pecker bouncing around in his shorts, and once he loses sight of that he moans and kicks the ball away.

God damn, we fucking suck.

Save us, Thiago.
 
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