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Kai Cole, Joss Whedon's Ex-Wife, calls him out as a 'Hypocrite Preaching Feminism'

Cipherr

Member
I dunno, could be accurate; but as a rule I try to keep away from going in 100% on what an ex has to say about the other in EITHER direction. It will make me look at his future work closely though, what has been heard cannot be unheard; even if its a lie or misrepresentation.
 

Pusherman

Member
Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.
 

kmfdmpig

Member
Joss Whedon and celebrities are humans with flaws. The expectation for them to be an idyllic representation or brand is what we have come to expect from public people like actors and big name directors, but this has not changed and is unsurprising.

Tiger Woods was the same way. People for some reason hated Tiger Woods for being the best golfer in the world whose brand as a family man was publicly shattered.

I can understand with politicians preaching family values and morals to win elections, but Whedon and Woods cheating on their wives is a personal issue.

Whedon sleeping with actresses is an ethically messy thing though if he is taking advantage of his position of power.

With Woods though it was the sheer volume that raised so many eyebrows. If he wanted to live that Derek Jeter lifestyle, which is fine, then why get married to someone who wanted a closed relationship? Choosing to get married should mean something. There's no requirement to marry.
 

shoelacer

Banned
Either 85%+ people in this thread are being purposefully obtuse or they fail to understand that women facing pressure to sleep with workplace superiors is a serious problem.

So now that he's been exposed as a serial philanderer, we can also infer that Whedon is pressuring young starlets into sleeping with him for roles? Hmm
 

Haly

One day I realized that sadness is just another word for not enough coffee.
When I was running ‘Buffy,’ I was surrounded by beautiful, needy, aggressive young women. It felt like I had a disease, like something from a Greek myth. Suddenly I am a powerful producer and the world is laid out at my feet and I can’t touch it
Damn what a line.
 
The world is full of flawed people who did awesome stuff but also did horrible stuff. Martin Luther King, for one. I'm not grabbing my torches and pitchforks for this.
 
This just tells me who he had affairs with, not that he abused his power.
if you are in a position to have fans, and you sleep with your fans... and the fact that he was married and shouldn't have been cheating, but he did and mostly seemed to get away with it.... what part about that is not him feeling like he is a powerful and taking advantage of that feeling and situation?
 
uh, so what? she's not only accusing him of cheating

It's pretty much the whole premise of the blog post.

Despite understanding, on some level, that what he was doing was wrong, he never conceded the hypocrisy of being out in the world preaching feminist ideals, while at the same time, taking away my right to make choices for my life and my body based on the truth. He deceived me for 15 years, so he could have everything he wanted. I believed, everyone believed, that he was one of the good guys, committed to fighting for women’s rights, committed to our marriage, and to the women he worked with. But I now see how he used his relationship with me as a shield, both during and after our marriage, so no one would question his relationships with other women or scrutinize his writing as anything other than feminist.
 
It's definitely not true, however I will say I do believe in general (obviously not everybody) that people are as faithful as their options.
I think this is pretty accurate. Something like 22% of men and 14% of women admit to cheating, but that number has to go way up as the number / attractiveness of people hitting on them does. Add stress and alcohol to the situation and I think more people would cheat than not.
 
As an aside, if I were Joss, and Cole is lying or at least stretching the truth to a harmful degree, I wouldn't want to stay silent. I would at least make a statement. Staying silent is going to hurt your kids and career a lot more than saying something in public.

Staying silent, at least to me, says to me that it is truth if not partially true.

Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.

This is a fucking amazing post.

"Supporting women has nothing to do with cheating on your wife."
 
Joss Whedon and celebrities are humans with flaws. The expectation for them to be an idyllic representation or brand is what we have come to expect from public people like actors and big name directors, but this has not changed and is unsurprising.

Tiger Woods was the same way. People for some reason hated Tiger Woods for being the best golfer in the world whose brand as a family man was publicly shattered.

I can understand with politicians preaching family values and morals to win elections, but Whedon and Woods cheating on their wives is a personal issue.

Whedon sleeping with actresses is an ethically messy thing though if he is taking advantage of his position of power.

It's not really just a 'personal issue' when he capitalized on that banner for work, and now also to seemingly sleep with other women. It's not just people trying to hold him to some pristine standard he didn't encourage himself or take advantage of himself.
 

siddx

Magnificent Eager Mighty Brilliantly Erect Registereduser
If you don't respect the woman you've married enough to maintain a monogamous relationship then it's kinda hard to call yourself a feminist.

Naw. Maybe in gafworld where human beings are simple and easy. Where we can conveniently categorize people into a handy and simple good and bad columns. But people aren't that fucking simple. A man can be weak enough to give in to his desires and betray his wife but also feel strongly about women's rights. Because we are complicated, and very very very much flawed.
 
Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.

Get out of here with your reasonable opinion.
 

LotusHD

Banned
The world is full of flawed people who did awesome stuff but also did horrible stuff. Martin Luther King, for one. I'm not grabbing my torches and pitchforks for this.

I always hear this line, as if to imply we're gonna go out and harass the person now, try to get him to quit, etc. When in reality we're just simply discussing his apparent hypocrisy.
 
Naw. Maybe in gafworld where human beings are simple and easy. Where we can conveniently categorize people into a handy and simple good and bad columns. But people aren't that fucking simple. A man can be weak enough to give in to his desires and betray his wife but also feel strongly about women's rights. Because we are complicated, and very very very much flawed.

A feminist can be a bad person. That poster didn't say "Joss Whedon is bad," they said "Joss Whedon is a bad feminist" (paraphrasing).
 

- J - D -

Member
Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.

Those personal failings potentially tie in with his professional life, a life in which he holds a great deal of power over people and control of a lot of ideas that people consume. So while the verdict may still be out, I wouldn't say they've got nothing to do with one another.
 

Volimar

Member
It's a strange phenomenon that all someone has to do is write something inflammatory and people will just believe it.


BronsonLee and Slayven are the same person.
 

Kinyou

Member
if you are in a position to have fans, and you sleep with your fans... and the fact that he was married and shouldn't have been cheating, but he did and mostly seemed to get away with it.... what part about that is not him feeling like he is a powerful and taking advantage of that feeling and situation?
People were specifically talking about him taking advantage of the people he had affairs with. I don't see her making that accusation. Her accusation is that she's the one who was being taken advantage of.
 
I think this is pretty accurate. Something like 22% of men and 14% of women admit to cheating, but that number has to go way up as the number / attractiveness of people hitting on them does. Add stress and alcohol to the situation and I think more people would cheat than not.

Right

I've observed and experienced it plenty of times.

I don't see how you got "he cheated on me so he's not a feminist" out of that.

Easily. LOL

"A hypocrite preaching feminism."
 
Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.
yeah, i mean routinely talking about feminism while apparently cheating on his wife for, i guess, most of their marriage(???), doesn't mean he's a bad feminist! he still believes women should be equal, 'cept for his wife whom he lied to for 15 years but wanted to keep her around because he liked her as a person. she just wasn't as hot as all those starlets he wanted nothing to do with outside a sexual relationship.

(and apparently she wasn't even enough emotionally because she mentions inappropriate emotional relationships too, which is like, why even keep lying to his wife other than he just wanted the comfort of having her around when no one else was??)
 

fanboi

Banned
I don't agree that if you cheat on your wife you are bad /not feminists.

You have to seperate gender and person. He migh not and most likely didn't respect his wife, but that has nothing to do with gender.

But of course if he used his position of power to cheat, that is another story.

Example, if I cheat on my wife with someone else, that doesn't take away my views that all genders should be treated equally, and that we need to do stuff to get up to par between all genders, but the cheating can be related to other, non gender specific problems that we have.
 

Zhylaw

Neo Member
I'm inclined to believe at least a respectable chunk of what she says. Not surprised in the slightest though, am I supposed to be? " A man is only as loyal as his options". I do take issue with the idea that this means he is a "fake" feminist or something though. Unless we know he pressured women using his position to sleep with him for sure. Cheating makes you a lousy and weak person not a misogynist.
 

Occam

Member
Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.

And I think we are done here. Nowhere does the blog post claim that he abused his power and forced anyone to have sex with him.
 

SeroTyler

First one to talk gets to stay on the aircraft!
As someone who enjoys quite a bit of his stuff, this is the least surprising thing ever.
 

Zhylaw

Neo Member
I don't agree that if you cheat on your wife you are bad /not feminists.

You have to seperate gender and person. He migh not and most likely didn't respect his wife, but that has nothing to do with gender.

But of course if he used his position of power to cheat, that is another story.

Example, if I cheat on my wife with someone else, that doesn't take away my views that all genders should be treated equally, and that we need to do stuff to get up to par between all genders, but the cheating can be related to other, non gender specific problems that we have.


My thoughts exactly
 
Easily. LOL

"A hypocrite preaching feminism."

Yes, and she explains how he's a hypocrite by using systems and power-relations that he publicly criticizes for his selfish reasons. Boiling down her argument to "he cheated on me" makes it easier to dismiss it but it isn't actually what she's saying.
 
BronsonLee and Slayven are the same person.

giphy.gif
 

danthefan

Member
And I think we are done here. Nowhere does the blog post claim that he abused his power and forced anyone to have sex with him.

This is the way these there's always go. GAF will always, always take whatever the accusation actually is and ramp it up tenfold.

The standards this forum tends to hold people to is laughable. He cheated, it's a shitty thing to do but honestly so fucking what. We all have more important things to worry about.
 
Being a feminist doesn't preclude you from being a flawed human being who cheats on your partner. Honestly, I think it's disgusting that his personal failings are being tied to his political ideals. They've got absolutely nothing to do with one another.

This was my take. I don't think feminism has anything to do with cheating/having affairs. Regardless, I have little sympathy for cheaters
 
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