See, we talk about people not understanding each other, but I'm not sure the other side understands the issue either.
It's not that easy to basically turn against your family, community, and friends who all believe differently than you. It takes a lot of courage to stand in the face of a huge group of people and tell them that you think their beliefs are garbage and especially so when they're literally those closest to you. In some cases, it's asking someone to give up close relationships altogether, often with no possible replacement or total alienation from their community if they do so. Many people actually do do this and are now met with, "everything is your fault for not trying harder" like that isn't super insensitive or frustrating.
Like, someone might not be able to even talk with their mother and father anymore, but hey, it's just another sign of white fragility when they complain that it feels like people are pointing the finger of blame squarely on them.