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[ItIsOkBro]

Omnomnom.

 

[Grym]

A garlic press is a great investment. Think of all the time and energy you'll save, and it gets texturally much more spreadable that way. It's great for homemade garlic bread, pizza and stir-fries, too. (Due to a taste bud incident I can no longer eat garlic so I have to vicarious enjoy it through y'all!)

It is a utensil I don't own. I should pick one up. I almost did once after I made a key lime pie. I figured using a press of some sort would be easier than squeezing all those tiny limes for juice. Goddamn that hurt my hands and forearms!! But the pie was a complete and total flop anyway. I never tried again...if it had turned out I probably would have bought a press to never have to do that again.

Not able to eat garlic? Oh my! My sincere condolences

 

[maxcriden]

It is a utensil I don't own. I should pick one up. I almost did once after I made a key lime pie. I figured using a press of some sort would be easier than squeezing all those tiny limes for juice. Goddamn that hurt my hands and forearms!! But the pie was a complete and total flop anyway. I never tried again...if it had turned out I probably would have bought a press to never have to do that again.

Not able to eat garlic? Oh my! My sincere condolences

Yep, I had this freak accident with some garlic-stuffed garlic knots that were a bit over-the-top and actually kind of ruined the back of my palate for several weeks. I saw an ENT and they couldn't figure it out exactly but basically if I eat garlic now it tastes incredibly strong and lingers for days. I used to love it, too.

BTW, garlic press =/= citrus press, but I definitely recommend both.

 

[terrisus]

Messed up your taste buds, and something good now tastes bad?
Well, I guess that would explain why you like broccoli :þ

 

[Grym]

Yep, I had this freak accident with some garlic-stuffed garlic knots that were a bit over-the-top and actually kind of ruined the back of my palate for several weeks. I saw an ENT and they couldn't figure it out exactly but basically if I eat garlic now it tastes incredibly strong and lingers for days. I used to love it, too.

BTW, garlic press =/= citrus press, but I definitely recommend both.

Wow, I have never heard of something like that. Sounds like it's best you avoid it then. Even though that is a horrible scenario to me in itself!

Oh yeah, I know. I just figured Key Limes are small enough to fit in a garlic press and I have other uses for that and not as much with a full-on citrus press.

 

[Mercury Fred]

Yessss! <3 Broccoli

Here's one of my favorite ways to have it:

-One head of broccoli, chopped into florets and stems, steamed until still very al dente or one package frozen broccoli (the Trader Joe's organic or Whole Foods ones are quite good for frozen)
-olive oil
-salt and pepper
-three cloves garlic, finely minced
-one lemon or some lemon juice
-freshly grated Parmesan cheese (optional)

Sauté the garlic in the olive oil in a heavy bottom, ideally non-stick large pan over medium heat for a few minutes. Add the broccoli, salt lightly and give a generous portion of black pepper (Trader Joe's has a great Salt, Pepper & Lemon grinder that I use for this too). Toss with the olive oil until the broccoli is coated and the garlic is nicely distributed.

Turn heat to high and leave don't touch the pan for a few minutes. As it starts to smoke, shake occasionally so the broccoli doesn't stick too much to the pan. You're looking for the florets to become dark brown/ caramelized and slightly charred. You can flip them too if you like the yummy brown bits everywhere as opposed to just doing it to one side of the broccoli.

When you look like you've got a nice bit of color on the broccoli, squeeze the juice of one lemon over the whole dish and shake the pan to de-glaze some of the caramelized bits. Toss to make sure the juice is everywhere, let it steam off, then serve immediately.

Sometimes I throw on some parmesan too but honestly, this preparation is so delicious that it doesn't even need it. I have this as a side or a meal in and of itself. Enjoy!

 

[maxcriden]

Messed up your taste buds, and something good now tastes bad?
Well, I guess that would explain why you like broccoli :þ

Haha, I always liked broccoli! My earliest memory is of my sister bringing over some broccoli baby food to be fed to me, at my mother's behest.

Wow, I have never heard of something like that. Sounds like it's best you avoid it then. Even though that is a horrible scenario to me in itself!

Oh yeah, I know. I just figured Key Limes are small enough to fit in a garlic press and I have other uses for that and not as much with a full-on citrus press.

Yep, it's not ideal, but I do avoid it for the most part now, except in stuff like premade salsas and at restaurants I just try to do my best. Good point about the key limes! I hadn't thought of that, but they are pretty tiny, haha.

 

[maxcriden]

Pressed garlic is the devil

Chopped garlic REPRESENT

*throws garlic-related gang signs*

(Google Images result for garlic gang.)

 

[farmerboy]

OMG we've got a real-life broccoli farmer here. So, you're paid to make broccoli. Do you still enjoy eating it, or is it like work to you to eat it?

Actually not really fond of it, prefer broccolini myself. But you all keep eating as it keeps us farmers in a job!!

Thanks that means a lot coming from a broccoli professional

The one thing I learned from growing it this year was that those cute little innocuous-looking white butterflies and their tiny green worm caterpillars are actually a plague sent from Satan himself. >:-{ (The only saving grace was that they focused on my kohlrabi before moving onto the broccoli, so the broccoli damage was minor)

They're called cabbage white butterflies and aren't they the cutest things. THEY ARE THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE. Though luckily they are pretty easy to control, aphids, thrips and other pests can be a lot harder to contain.

About 5 years ago I started using IPM (Integrated Pest Management) which means I use chemicals with the right chemistry that targets only the pests and not beneficial insects such as wasps and ladybirds. The wasps and ladybirds then eat the caterpillars and help control them. Google images for ladybird larvae, they are a death machine!!

We've even started propagating the wasps and releasing them into the fields to help bolster their population.

The REAL bonus is that we grow veggies that are grown with much less chemical.

If you want to do something similar use products such Xentari, Dipel and Delfin, (if you can get a hold of them). They are BTs, which means they are a virus that will kill the caterpillars and are VERY safe to humans.

If you can't get a hold of the BTs, other chemicals that will do the same job (but are not a virus, they are more traditional chemistry) are Belt, Success and Avatar. These are generally safe for humans if used correctly.

Anyway good job, keep going.

Edit: I'm in Australia so some of the chemical names might be different in your country.

 

[terrisus]

We've even started propagating the wasps and releasing them into the fields to help bolster their population.

Next time anyone gets stung by a wasp, remember: It's broccoli's fault.

 

[Masquerader]

Next time anyone gets stung by a wasp, remember: It's broccoli's fault.

On that note, we should completely get rid of honey, wax, and flowers. It's the only way to avoid getting stung by winged 'menaces'...! Besides, Broccoli (yes, I've started to capitalise a vegetable. Sue me) is good for curing stings. In my mind.

 

[farmerboy]

Next time anyone gets stung by a wasp, remember: It's broccoli's fault.

LOL, they are tiny wasps about 3-5mm long, they don't harm us. But they lay their eggs into the caterpillar which then hatch and eat it from the inside out. Brutal stuff!!

 

[terrisus]

On that note, we should completely get rid of honey, wax, and flowers. It's the only way to avoid getting stung by winged 'menaces'...! Besides, Broccoli (yes, I've started to capitalise a vegetable. Sue me) is good for curing stings. In my mind.

<3

But they lay their eggs into the caterpillar which then hatch and eat it from the inside out. Brutal stuff!!

 

[maxcriden]

of course terrisus would post barf that looks like delicious broccoli....

 

[terrisus]

Of course maxcriden would think that vomit looked like broccoli.

 

[maxcriden]

Of course maxcriden would think that vomit looked like broccoli.

honestly that just looks like someone taking too big of a bite of delicious broccoli (stalk first).

Throw some tater tots on top of that barf and that's how they cook broccoli in Minnesota.

haha, tater tot casserole/hotdish did always see gross to me. worse, lutefisk.

ex. a:

ex. b:

 

[terrisus]

TIL I'm not the only one who thinks broccoli looks like vomit.

 

[Masquerader]

Spoiler

Granted, broccoli only looks nice when raw. When cooked, it mainly looks like vomit. So do 60% of vegetables, mind.

 

[grandwizard]

Anyone else like those little boxes of frozen chopped broccoli they sell at the supermarket? I stock up on those because they are super easy to just throw in the microwave and have some good tasty vegetables.

 

[maxcriden]

Anyone else like those little boxes of frozen chopped broccoli they sell at the supermarket? I stock up on those because they are super easy to just throw in the microwave and have some good tasty vegetables.

I don't know if I've seen those. Are they like the cubed butternut squash ones?

 

[BroggieDoge]

Does broccoli make your pee smell?

 

[Zukuu]

I love broccoli. Broccoli cream soup with big chunks is like the best thing ever.

 

[Timeaisis]

Broccoli is the Satan of vegetables.

 

[Dead Man]

Broccoli is one of my go to vegetables. Gets added to almost everything.

I love broccoli. Broccoli cream soup with big chunks is like the best thing ever.

I know know what I am having for lunch. Not quite that, but creamed vegetable soup with broccoli chunks. Thank you.

 

[God Dayumm]

I just had broccoli, in case anyone cares

 

[maxcriden]

Broccoli is the Satan of vegetables.

I always thought of you as someone with such good taste.

I just had broccoli, in case anyone cares

I care! What kind?

 

[God Dayumm]

I always thought of you as someone with such good taste.



I care! What kind?

I wrapped raw broccoli in tinfoil and put it in the oven. Then put a chunk of butter after it was done. What kind is that?

 

[maxcriden]

I wrapped raw broccoli in tinfoil and put it in the oven. Then put a chunk of butter after it was done. What kind is that?

A good kind!

 

[freenudemacusers]

please add this to the op

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGUzKc_h5E0

i like to meditate on this while eating broccoli. becomes transcendental and spiritual.

 

[Timeaisis]

I always thought of you as someone with such good taste.

Broccoli is a line I refuse to cross.

 

[Timeaisis]

Broccoli> Your favourite veggie

Broccoli > Nothing?

Sounds good!

Ahahaha. My thoughts exactly.

EDIT: Ugh. Double post. Apologies.

 

[satori]

Wow I normally just steam mine. Some of those recipes looks great lol. Need to try some tonight. Broccoli I have always been a fan of. Recently I been eating eggplants and love them as well. Broccoli, asparagus, and eggplants are my top teir

 

[maxcriden]

Ugh, WTH:

http://www.nintendolife.com/news/20...des_the_waves_to_the_wii_u_eshop_on_31st_july

Check out the vid.

Broccoli cast as the villain?! Game looks neat but what is this world coming to...?

On the other hand, haha, apparently it's based on a webcomic:

http://www.icecreamsurfer.com

 

[Masquerader]

Ugh, WTH:

http://www.nintendolife.com/news/20...des_the_waves_to_the_wii_u_eshop_on_31st_july

Check out the vid.

Broccoli cast as the villain?! Game looks neat but what is this world coming to...?

On the other hand, haha, apparently it's based on a webcomic:

http://www.icecreamsurfer.com

#Notallbroccoli

Spoiler

Anyway, antagonists are always cooler and more interesting than protagonists.

 

[maxcriden]

Broccoli propaganda from the Tampa Bay Times:

How did broccoli become the poster child of the good-for-you yet ostensibly bad-tasting vegetable? • Broccoli has long been an othered vegetable in America. As late as the 1920s, most Americans (the ones who had heard of it, anyway) associated it disdainfully with Italian immigrants, who were its primary consumers. • According to Joel Denker in The World on a Plate, it wasn't until 1928 that broccoli first was distributed regionally, and it wasn't until the mid 1940s, after intense marketing campaigns by broccoli distributors, that it gained recognition among non-Italians.

Recognition isn't the same thing as popularity, and though Americans came to eat broccoli, they didn't necessarily trust it. Broccoli remained an outsider during the canned-vegetable era of post-World War II suburban America because it's nearly impossible to can. This meant that when Americans consumed it in the 1950s and 1960s, it was usually cooked from scratch — which strengthened its association with the "well-meaning but overbearing mother figure," to quote The Rhetoric of Food editor Joshua Frye.

In 1962, the New York Times reported that Americans consumed, on average, 7 pounds of carrots but only 1 pound of broccoli per year. Over the next couple of decades, broccoli earned a bit of hippie cred: It rated very highly on Frances Moore Lappé's most protein-efficient vegetables chart in her vegetarian treatise Diet for a Small Planet and took a starring role in Mollie Katzen's meatless cookbook The Enchanted Broccoli Forest.

But broccoli didn't become a conservative rhetorical weapon until 1990, when then-President George H.W. Bush declared, "I do not like broccoli, and I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it, and I'm president of the United States, and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli." It was a conflation of American freedom and childish rebellion, and it set off a brief firestorm in the media (and prompted a tongue-in-cheek shipment of broccoli to the White House from the United Fresh Fruit and Vegetable Association).

Of course, the 41st president of the United States is not the only broccoli hater out there. Considering broccoli's unique dual texture (dense, sometimes stringy stalks and clustered, frilly florets) and the fact that it's difficult to disguise said texture, it's no surprise broccoli has a bad rap among kids (who have a natural aversion to bitterness) and picky adults. And unlike spinach, which earned considerable points among children when Popeye entered the scene, broccoli has never gotten a pop culture reprieve.

Though the Supreme Court justices made the forced-broccoli-buying scenarios about as dry as possible in their opinions on the health care act, the function of the metaphor as a rhetorical device is clear: It attempts to make listeners feel like kids at a dinner table, being coerced into doing something they don't want to do by their overbearing mom.

--

Can the feds make you buy broccoli?

Justice Antonin Scalia asked Obama administration lawyer Donald Verrilli in March to defend the individual mandate provision of the Affordable Care Act and wondered why Washington bureaucrats couldn't also make citizens buy vegetables.

"Could you define the market? Everybody has to buy food sooner or later, so you define the market as food; therefore, everybody is in the market; therefore, you can make people buy broccoli," Scalia said during oral arguments.

"No, that's quite different," Verrilli said. "That's quite different. The food market, while it shares that trait that everybody's in it, it is not a market in which your participation is often unpredictable and often involuntary. It is not a market in which you often don't know before you go in what you need, and it is not a market in which, if you go in and seek to obtain a product or service, you will get it even if you can't pay for it."

Politico

http://www.tampabay.com/features/food/cooking/why-is-broccoli-americas-most-hated-vegetable/1239460

 

[maxcriden]

Dinner tonight: salad with romaine, broccoli slaw, pomegranate seeds, crispy bacon, avocado, and smoky tomato dressing. So good.

 

[Freaky Fred]

I just bought some brocc for dinner tomorrow.

I'll make some chicken brocc alfredo tomorrow and some soup with the stalks the next day.

 

[GoldenEye 007]

I just steamed some broccoli with some light all-purpose seasoning and a bit of Irish butter.

 

[terrisus]

Max, I've been alerted to the fact that you may be planning to kill me and prepare me with a side of broccoli.
>.>

 

[maxcriden]

I just bought some brocc for dinner tomorrow.

I'll make some chicken brocc alfredo tomorrow and some soup with the stalks the next day.

pics or it never happened (soup w/ stalks?)

I just steamed some broccoli with some light all-purpose seasoning and a bit of Irish butter.

see above reply

Max, I've been alerted to the fact that you may be planning to kill me and prepare me with a side of broccoli.
>.>

who's spouting such nonsense? freaky frank?

 

[Pathos]

broccoli is the shit

 

[Freaky Fred]

(soup w/ stalks?)

the stalks are good, you just gotta peel the touch skin off, simmer them in some chicken broth or vegetable stock(I throw in some onions and garlic too), blend them up and add some cream. Cheap and easy cream of broccoli soup

can't be wasting any part of that brocc!

 

[terrisus]

who's spouting such nonsense? freaky frank?

Nope, it definitely wasn't freaky frank.

broccoli is shit

ftfy

 

[maxcriden]

the stalks are good, you just gotta peel the touch skin off, simmer them in some chicken broth or vegetable stock(I throw in some onions and garlic too), blend them up and add some cream. Cheap and easy cream of broccoli soup

can't be wasting any part of that brocc!

check you out, super efficient as always. what's the touch skin, though? :-/

 

[GoldenEye 007]

I would have posted pics. But I ate it already! The broccoli that is.

 

[Freaky Fred]

check you out, super efficient as always. what's the touch skin, though? :-/

shiiiit I meant tough skin on the stalk.

thoughts of future broccoli are clouding my mind, can't type properly

I would have posted pics. But I ate it already! The broccoli that is.

that's what maxc will be saying about his fellow vermont GAFfers after the meetup. "Would've taken pics but I ate them already"

 

[maxcriden]

I would have posted pics. But I ate it already! The broccoli that is.

next time, then. no after pics, though, please!

shiiiit I meant tough skin on the stalk.

thoughts of future broccoli are clouding my mind, can't type properly

that's what maxc will be saying about his fellow vermont GAFfers after the meetup. "Would've taken pics but I ate them already"

ohh, i just thought it was a freudian slip about how excited you are to cook broccoli for terrisus.

 

[Septimus Prime]

Nope, it definitely wasn't freaky frank.




ftfy

You hate broccoli and dark meat chicken? Man. We are opposites.

 

[terrisus]

You hate broccoli and dark meat chicken? Man. We are opposites.

It's like Jack Sprat and his wife.

 

[maxcriden]

lunch today: carribean citrus brown rice spiral pasta with roasted tomatoes and broccoli. yum.