What are some of the weirdest things you've done or had happen to you during sex?

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Palculator said:
How big was the chain? Just some small necklace type thing or something strong you could hook something heavy onto?
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Pretty strong, maybe 1.5 inches thick? Surely not a necklace. Can't remember exactly, but left me wondering how in the fuck that would've worked out....
 
McLovin said:
Don't have one myself, but my sister found out her bf cheated on her. He happened to like eating ass so she took a dump right before having sex. I believe he went in blind lol.
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Good move from her !
Palculator said:
How big was the chain? Just some small necklace type thing or something strong you could hook something heavy onto?
Click to expand...
Tyrions-Chain_art.png
 
Boy, my life is tame. Was going to say the time after my sister's wedding that I was with one of the bridesmaids and we fell off the bed. And then I found out years later she was a virgin at the time (she was 6 years older than me). I remember thinking to myself like "This is more awkward than it should be..." and then my sister spilled the beans to me about 4 or 5 years later that I was her first. But boy that's no match for this thread.

Another time my dog got into our bedroom and I was willing to tolerate his presence as long as he didn't jump onto the bed. Well he jumped onto the bed, being an obsessive licker, starts licking one of my butt cheeks/thighs. It was too weird and I stopped, had to wrestle him out of the room.
 
Alo0oy said:
The tent completely fell off, and it was a relatively big tent (the size of a typical 2 person hotel room), and it was in a popular camping area.

Thankfully, it all happened at night.

EDIT: I should add that this is the middle east, so getting caught meant being forced to marry her, I was 17 and she was 15 at the time. So a buddy helped us out.
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I thought you were talking about a different 'tent'. This post got weird.
 
I was getting head from an ex and was playing music to drown out our sex noises for my roomies and right as I came the Final Fantasy victory theme started playing and we both started laughing really hard. Unfortunately I was still cumming so she sorta...snorted my cum out through her nose. Which only made us laugh harder (tho she did describe it as blisteringly painful while we cleaned up).

I'm kinky and get with kinksters so I have a lot of weirder ones that are just kinda normal fair for me now. First ex who got me into pegging liked to say "It's rape time" before she put the dildo in. I was...not a fan of this and she kept saying it a lot after I asked her to stop. One time we were pegging on my shit bed which started rolling across the floor so she made it a game to see if she could make it to the other side of the room before I came. She won but in the end so did I.

One ex liked to get beat up, and I mean like "Hit me as hard as you can in the stomach while choking me" like fuck me up type stuff. One kink I have trouble getting into is violent stuff so that shit was a bit hard for me but I did it. I pretty much stopped when she asked me to give her a black eye and she came the hardest I've ever seen her but seeing her walking around with a shiner after was just too much for me. Never went in that hard again, it scared the shit out of me.

I'm sure I have way weirder stuff I can't remember. Poured wax in a girl's hair once. That was odd.
 
My freshman year of college I was banging this girl in my shower. We were going at it pretty hard and then I pulled out so we could switch positions. As I pulled out she turned around and her eyes looked sort of empty. A second later she collapsed with a loud thud as her head smashed into the tub/shower faucet on the way down. I stood there in shock for a bit and she didn't get up, causing me to run around my apartment naked, panicked and screaming like a little girl thinking this girl had just died in my shower. Finally I went back in and pulled her out of the water and a few moments later she woke up and everything was good.

Some of the most terrifying minutes of my life lol
 
I got caught shagging a mancunian lass on a pier in Ibiza by 5 Spanish policemen. We had been using some fishing nets as a comfy spot to do the deed.
 
One time this chick farted on my dick after I pulled out, and then proceeded to suck it to my surprise. She tried to kiss me after and I was like "naaaaah girl wash your face and brush your teeth"
 
Pulled out a girls ass, got a waft of ass, proceeded to throw up on her back, which in turn made her wretch and throw up and fart at the same, which only made the smells worse...

That was not a fun clean up.
 
GF and I were humping and I went to smack the booty, but she pulled away from me so I pulled up and closed my hand. She suddenly backed into me again, and with my hand still balled up, I ended up punching her in the ass. She yelped and hopped away from me, and we spent a good five minutes laughing about it before resuming.
 
A girl I fooled around with for a few months loved to be smacked, spanked etc.

Eventually it got to the point where she had me full windup, haymaker slap her right across the face. After that I started to feel a little uncomfortable doing it haha.

She also had a boyfriend at the time who lived in another city, who I later found out was actually her fiancée.
 
Went in without a condom. Nine months later a small human burst out of her.

And honest to God, if that's not the weirdest shit that's ever happened because of sex, I don't know what is.

The Albatross said:
Another time my dog got into our bedroom and I was willing to tolerate his presence as long as he didn't jump onto the bed. Well he jumped onto the bed, being an obsessive licker, starts licking one of my butt cheeks/thighs. It was too weird and I stopped, had to wrestle him out of the room.
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Dogs are weird about it. We call our dog Post-Coitus Pup. He's all up in our business as soon as we get done.
 
this thread jesus

- a fwb was trying to deepthroat me and threw up, we cleaned up then finished

- tried fingering that same girl's ass and got poop on my fingers :(

- same girl used to make me bleed sometimes by scratching or biting me so hard

that's about it
 
Finale Fireworker said:
I was with my new girlfriend and we had only recently professed our love for each other. I had my forehead on her forehead and things were really, really nice. Then I lifted my head up and there was blood all over her face. She had one eye closed and her lips pursed to keep it from going into her mouth. It was horrific.

I had gotten a bloody nose and bled, copiously, all over her. Including in her open eye. ("My vision just went totally red, it was so scary!") I was mortified and humiliated, but she laughed about it. She got up and cleaned up and I just sat on the bed with tissues in my nose thinking she was probably going to leave me now, despite our recent confessions.

When she came back, she told me not to worry about it. I said, "but I bled in your EYE."

And she said, "but we're in love!"

We're still together. It's been three and a half years. We still have sex, too!
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This happened to me too. Except all the "we're in love part". I'm like "shit you're bleeding" then "shit I'm bleeding on you". She didn't even care, we just cleaned up and then started over again.

Not a weird thing that happened but I had sex with my landlady on a jungle gym in our neighborhood. That was pretty amazing and fun.
 
Shia_Labeouf said:
Went in without a condom. Nine months later a small human burst out of her.

And honest to God, if that's not the weirdest shit that's ever happened because of sex, I don't know what is.
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What about when a girl asks you to hide behind the bed while you fist her and she does her best Miss Piggy impression while role-playing with a Kermit the Frog doll?
 
I was extremely tired and constantly on the verge of passing out, my eyes constantly closing, and my girlfriend just kept yelling at me to stay awake and fucking me more. She did this like 3 or 4 more times over the next hour or so until she let me sleep. She really wanted me to stay awake with her, so she just yelled a lot and fucked me a few times.
 
While camping and having sex I grabbed some sticks and started flapping my arms wildly while screaming "I AM THE TREE GOD AND I WILL INSEMINATE YOU! YOU WILL GIVE BIRTH TO MY TREE CHILDREN! ARE YOU ENJOYING YOURSELF MY SHUBBERY QUEEN?"

We broke up the next day.
 
I'm sure it's written out in long form somewhere on GAF, but back when I lived in MD, a GF swung by my apartment planning a great night of sex, but I was already halfway through a bottle of Jack Daniels and wrapped the fuck up in the Sonic collection for Sega Saturn.

I blacked out, and awoke the next morning naked as the day I was born, with my head hanging off the foot of the bed, controller still in my hand. She was angry, but proceeded to tell me how she fucked me harder than she'd fucked anything before, and I never let go of the controller.

This was the same girl who, in retrospect, wanted me to put it in her ass, but I was too dense to realize that her saying "you know you want to" was an opening for me to say "I'll get the lube, you just wait there."

Another time, I farted to get a girl off of me. She just couldn't make me bust, and honestly I was tired of that bony ass grinding into my leg. Shit fucking hurt.

I also had sex in the same room, at the same time a buddy of mine was having sex in that same room. The morning after, we both asked each other just to confirm, and laughed our asses off. Our girls were more mature about it than we were.
 
The Albatross said:
Boy, my life is tame. Was going to say the time after my sister's wedding that I was with one of the bridesmaids and we fell off the bed. And then I found out years later she was a virgin at the time (she was 6 years older than me). I remember thinking to myself like "This is more awkward than it should be..." and then my sister spilled the beans to me about 4 or 5 years later that I was her first. But boy that's no match for this thread.

Another time my dog got into our bedroom and I was willing to tolerate his presence as long as he didn't jump onto the bed. Well he jumped onto the bed, being an obsessive licker, starts licking one of my butt cheeks/thighs. It was too weird and I stopped, had to wrestle him out of the room.
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..... You were your sister's first....... I can't even bold because I'm on mobile.
 
Had a dude spring a piss fetish on me out of no where. Alarm bells should've been going off when he wanted to have sex in his basement that had towels everywhere; it was his own little piss chamber.
 
I'm judging all of you so hard right now. :LOL

Except for The Wall. Thats a completely fucked situation and I'm glad you got out of it.
 
NotTheGuyYouKill said:
Some of you people are fucked up
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Bitch please, you wish you made this thread.

during a threesome one girl snuck up from behind me and started rubbing her vibrator on my ass, I said no in a forceful away. She whimpered, said ok, and went to town on herself in the corner before both me and the other chick felt bad enough to join her.
 
Exodust said:
Bitch please, you wish you made this thread.

during a threesome one girl snuck up from behind me and started rubbing her vibrator on my ass, I said no in a forceful away. She whimpered, said ok, and went to town on herself in the corner before both me and the other chick felt bad enough to join her.
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Nah he made the anonymous confession thread so he see some real shit.
 
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