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[Rapstah]

Wasn't this thread supposed to be about biggest lies on the forums that were hilarious?

Not really by the examples of what wasn't allowed in the OP. Such a thread would be pretty fun though if you were to make it.

 

[ckohler]

There are five lights.

Seriously though, it's probably Homeopathy or something.

 

[mclaren777]

Jesus is white.

Great answer.

 

[Amir0x]

Not really by the examples of what wasn't allowed in the OP. Such a thread would be pretty fun though if you were to make it.

The most hilarious forum based lie was the one where that guy had like six of his 360s broke and then people asked him to post a picture of his set up and then his 360 was sitting on a giant amp. Then he tried to claim it was a winecooler but someone posted a picture of the amp in question. It was preeetty funny.

 

[ThoseDeafMutes]

We all know what tact means. What you are not illustrating is how a statement of fact equals "lacking tact." Is there some easier, gentler way to coddle people so as not to be offended by the reality of the statement?

Either you have the social skills of a fourth grader and genuinely aren't aware that it's possible to discuss things without insulting the other person (or whole demographics), or you do know and you're just deliberately being a dickhead. When you assert highly controversial opinions, referring to them as "facts" is not only arrogant, it's counterproductive. Snidely dismissing other people is the fastest way to get them to ignore anything and everything you're saying, whether you're right or wrong. You know this, so the only thing left to assume is that you're just trolling religious GAF.

In the specific case we are discussing here, "the bible has been conclusively proven false" is total nonsense, unless what you actually meant to say was "some things in the bible have been proven conclusively false", and are arguing against the wholly imaginary "the bible is the inerrant word of God and is 100% true" GAF.

 

[Momo]

Can someone tell me what's wrong with this guy/girl?

First, you're acting like a poopbag and hardly being civil.

Second you're throwing slights my way like: I'm stupid (Einstein), now saying there is something "wrong" with me?

Thought I'd warn you, but idc what you do with your joke account bro.

 

[manueldelalas]

Homosexuality is perfectly normal (lol)

Global cooling.
Global warming.
Climate change (see the pattern?)

Massive destruction weapons or terrorist group in Irak/Afganistan/Pakistan (choose your least favorite middle east country and beat the hell out of them to divert attention from shitty government)

Change (when said by ANY politician in ANY situation or context)

Equal genders (LOL, then why are most sports divided by it?)

Equal races of men (going to get a lot of shit for this, but why is it that in certain activities there is a race superior to all the others?)

Any form of socialism

Everything is possible with effort (biggest lie of them all, some people just don't have the capabilities, not everyone can be a writer or actor, or learn quantum physics or engineering, etc)

 

[Mattdaddy]

"If you go to college you will get a good job." - My parents.

 

[shanshan310]

Either you have the social skills of a fourth grader and genuinely aren't aware that it's possible to discuss things without insulting the other person (or whole demographics), or you do know and you're just deliberately being a dickhead. When you assert highly controversial opinions, referring to them as "facts" is not only arrogant, it's counterproductive. Snidely dismissing other people is the fastest way to get them to ignore anything and everything you're saying, whether you're right or wrong. You know this, so the only thing left to assume is that you're just trolling religious GAF.

In the specific case we are discussing here, "the bible has been conclusively proven false" is total nonsense, unless what you actually meant to say was "some things in the bible have been proven conclusively false", and are arguing against the wholly imaginary "the bible is the inerrant word of God and is 100% true" GAF.

quoted for truth. Now lets get back to lies.

Pretty sure there was that incident where the UN said there would be 50 million of "global warming refugees" by 2010. And then they look the site down with no explanation.

EDIT: http://thenewamerican.com/tech-main...un-cover-up-of-climate-refugees-scandal-fails

 

[Mael]

Being obese myself at one point, I wish maybe more people did do that. I personally wouldn't tell an obese person to stop being fat because there is the off chance it is some sort of disease, and I don't want to risk that. That said, I would readily preach against the problems of obesity online in threads like these and I wouldn't be gentle about the factual risks involved with being fat.

So you can be nice to overweight people but decide to be dicks to believers?
Despite the fact that if there's any health program that you pay for they will profit from it while you pay directly making your life harder while religious people believing in their home not even interacting with you only concern you on a more indirect way?

 

[Dark Octave]

"Homosexuality is a mental disorder"

I wouldn't say mental disorder in the negative sense, but we are all put on this Earth to reproduce and continue the human race. If you're gay, you are not a part of what we are meant to do. I would say that nature has ways of controlling overpopulation and homosexuality could be one of them.

But overall, I would say being gay is no more a mental defect than being left handed.

 

[threenote]

First, you're acting like a poopbag and hardly being civil.

Second you're throwing slights my way like: I'm stupid (Einstein), now saying there is something "wrong" with me?

Thought I'd warn you, but idc what you do with your joke account bro.

What on earth are you saying?

 

[Amir0x]

Homosexuality is perfectly normal (lol)

See, this is the type of stuff the Bible allows you to believe.

So you can be nice to overweight people but decide to be dicks to believers?
Despite the fact that if there's any health program that you pay for they will profit from it while you pay directly making your life harder while religious people believing in their home not even interacting with you only concern you on a more indirect way?

It's a huge logical failing on your part to think religion indirectly concerns me, or anyone else. I live in a country where politicians regularly state that evolution isn't a fact (and want to change text books to this effect) where we have presidents that suggests God told them to go to war.

I can assure you, religious people affect my tax dollars far more than fat people.

 

[The Technomancer]

Any form of socialism

Everything is possible with effort (biggest lie of them all, some people just don't have the capabilities, not everyone can be a writer or actor, or learn quantum physics or engineering, etc)

I don't follow. If you acknowledge that not everyone can do everything then you acknowledge that not everyone can be "successful" by our modern standards which seems like it leads to some forms of socialism. Unless the alternative is "not everyone can be successful, so those that can't just get to live in poverty"

 

[dschalter]

death isn't final.

 

[Wilsongt]

"It's not you. It's me."
"We should just be friends."

 

[U n i o n 0015]

That happiness is a constant, attainable state.

 

[jaxword]

the biggest lie are those who believe God doesn't exist

Agreed, take that atheists. They're just liars. All of them. Do you think we should bring back blasphemy laws to brand them as unbelievers?

 

[Mael]

See, this is the type of stuff the Bible allows you to believe.

If you really believe that only religious people believe in that, I've got a bridge to sell you.

 

[daviyoung]

"We'll keep in touch"

 

[CornBurrito]

Homosexuality is perfectly normal (lol)

Global cooling.
Global warming.
Climate change (see the pattern?)

Define "normal" please. And did you perhaps mean natural, because it is natural.

The name was changed because Global Warming was a terrible name to begin with. It was never "planet is getting warmer and warmer!" but a whole host of problems.

I wouldn't say mental disorder in the negative sense, but we are all put on this Earth to reproduce and continue the human race. If you're gay, you are not a part of what we are meant to do. I would say that nature has ways of controlling overpopulation and homosexuality could be one of them.

But overall, I would say being gay is no more a mental defect than being left handed.

I suggest you research the origins of altruism. Sometimes it is more beneficial to the species as a whole that YOU personally don't reproduce. Homosexuality may very well have a similar evolutionary purpose.

 

[DiipuSurotu]

I wouldn't say mental disorder in the negative sense, but we are all put on this Earth to reproduce and continue the human race. If you're gay, you are not a part of what we are meant to do. I would say that nature has ways of controlling overpopulation and homosexuality could be one of them.

But overall, I would say being gay is no more a mental defect than being left handed.

We aren't "meant" to do anything, unless you believe in Intelligent Design.

 

[shanshan310]

Agreed, take that atheists. They're just liars. All of them. Do you think we should bring back blasphemy laws to brand them as unbelievers?

come on man, we were just getting over that derail.

 

[Earthstrike]

What exactly makes a lie big? The extent of its untruthfullness? The number of people that believed it? Some combination of the two? A serious contender (if it hasn't been mentioned) would be the lie told in North Korea that the rest of the world was ravaged by Nuclear Holocaust.

 

[meadowrag]

I wouldn't say mental disorder in the negative sense, but we are all put on this Earth to reproduce and continue the human race. If you're gay, you are not a part of what we are meant to do. I would say that nature has ways of controlling overpopulation and homosexuality could be one of them.

But overall, I would say being gay is no more a mental defect than being left handed.

Says who?
I never understood why reproduction is considered destiny or purpose by some people. I mean what's the end goal? It's a biological function, but I don't know why it's what we are MEANT to do. People will do it, but people will also breath and die and take shits. You can say we are meant to do all those things to, but I don't really see why one way or another.

 

[Qwomo]

Homosexuality is perfectly normal (lol)

Global cooling.
Global warming.
Climate change (see the pattern?)

Massive destruction weapons or terrorist group in Irak/Afganistan/Pakistan (choose your least favorite middle east country and beat the hell out of them to divert attention from shitty government)

Change (when said by ANY politician in ANY situation or context)

Equal genders (LOL, then why are most sports divided by it?)

Equal races of men (going to get a lot of shit for this, but why is it that in certain activities there is a race superior to all the others?)

Any form of socialism

Everything is possible with effort (biggest lie of them all, some people just don't have the capabilities, not everyone can be a writer or actor, or learn quantum physics or engineering, etc)

You forgot heliocentrism!

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=424176&page=16

 

[StudioTan]

"I promise I won't cum in you"

 

[RankoSD]

"We have recovered a crashed flying saucer and the alien bodies"

Day after that: "We are sorry about the previous report, it was just a weather balloon"

 

[Roxas]

Iraq War without a doubt. At least 250,000 people dead and who knows how many unconfirmed dead. Soldiers sent to die for an illegal war which was entirely based on what i would call "flimsy" evidence at best.

 

[The Technomancer]

Says who?
I never understood why reproduction is considered destiny or purpose by some people. I mean what's the end goal? It's a biological function, but I don't know why it's what we are MEANT to do. People will do it, but people will also breath and die and take shits. You can say we are meant to do all those things to, but I don't really see why one way or another.

Because its what drives the wheels of evolution and ensures the continuation of the species. Which is why its awesome (or maybe not, but that's another argument) that we now live in a world where we can transcend the cycle of "survival of the fittest" and where there are other ways to contribute to society then just making children.

 

[Earthstrike]

I wouldn't say mental disorder in the negative sense, but we are all put on this Earth to reproduce and continue the human race. If you're gay, you are not a part of what we are meant to do. I would say that nature has ways of controlling overpopulation and homosexuality could be one of them.

But overall, I would say being gay is no more a mental defect than being left handed.

This is incorrect. Tribal species tend to have all its members contribute to the existence of a species. Consider bees. Nearly all the males don't reproduce, but their collective contributions to the hive allow there to be a successful future swam and future reproduction.
Gay males in old tribes would still: Gather food, defend the youth of his tribe from enemies.

 

[Live Free or Die]

Evolution

 

[iapetus]

That one wasn't ever actually said by Gates, though I guess the idea that he said it counts as a lie.

He did, however, say "What's a network?"

 

[jaxword]

Evolution

This.

Also, that McDonald's makes you fat.

 

[manueldelalas]

I don't follow. If you acknowledge that not everyone can do everything then you acknowledge that not everyone can be "successful" by our modern standards which seems like it leads to some forms of socialism. Unless the alternative is "not everyone can be successful, so those that can't just get to live in poverty"

I don't follow your logic.

There are thousands of failed (bad english alert!) people in every area of knowledge, especially the artistic ones, that doesn't mean they can't be successful in other activities. The key word here is freedom to choose. you can choose to be a writer, you can't choose to be a successful one, even if you try as hard as you can.

This are facts, hard data, I don't see why you relate that to socialism, it is part of human nature, there are people that are better in every way than you and people that are worse than you, in every way too.

Of course there are people that don't have any talent and are bound to be unsuccessful in everything they do in life, but that is a big minority.

 

[meadowrag]

Because its what drives the wheels of evolution and ensures the continuation of the species.

Well sure, everyone knows the function of reproduction in that sort of structural sense. That explanation still does not give the act any specific purpose or self-evident meaning such as the above poster was attributing to it.

What difference does the evolution and continuation of the species make, is basically what I'm getting at.

 

[Chavelo]

First, you're acting like a poopbag and hardly being civil.

Second you're throwing slights my way like: I'm stupid (Einstein), now saying there is something "wrong" with me?

Thought I'd warn you, but idc what you do with your joke account bro.

Backseat modding is... well, you would know. Since you been around here this parts, partner.

 

[The Technomancer]

Of course there are people that don't have any talent and are bound to be unsuccessful in everything they do in life, but that is a big minority.

I think its debatable at least that there are a lot of people who's skills and talents don't translate into anything that our current society values highly.

 

[Kinyou]

"Ich bin ein Berliner"

No you aren't! You don't even live there!

 

[Naked Snake]

That saturated fat causes heart disease.

 

[manueldelalas]

You forgot heliocentrism!

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=424176&page=16

Heliocentrism is a theory as valid (or failed) as geocentrism; it's just a matter of perspective. There isn't a single thing that is explained in heliocentrism that can't be explained with geocentrism or vice versa.

I can even say that I am the center of the universe and everything turns around me, and it would be as valid; the rest is just theories. And we already had this discussion, no need to bring it here.

 

[magicstop]

I just won't believe it.



Faux Edit for seriousness: I think the biggest lie that we've been told is that civilization is good, that its "progress" is good, and that it accurately reflects human nature.

Real edit:

I can even say that I am the center of the universe and everything turns around me, and it would be as valid; the rest is just theories. And we already had this discussion, no need to bring it here.

Oh hell yes. Here we gooooooooo

 

[Qwomo]

Heliocentrism is a theory as valid (or failed) as geocentrism; it's just a matter of perspective. There isn't a single thing that is explained in heliocentrism that can't be explained with geocentrism or vice versa.

I can even say that I am the center of the universe and everything turns around me, and it would be as valid; the rest is just theories. And we already had this discussion, no need to bring it here.

 

[Rapstah]

 

[Ashes]

fiction is technically a lie, so I will say: stories.

It's the oldest, biggest, most inventive deliberate lie, with the single largest widest impact on history. It covers pretty much every subject, every language, everything from gossip to news. Storytellers are found throughout human history.

 

[Eight Diagram Bat Fighter]

A god who has variously endorsed pedophilia, rape, genocide, human sacrifice as "penance" for others sins, infanticide is about as vile a character as I can imagine.

It goes without saying that this lie propagated has been so successfully integrated into the mind of gullible people that they actually think this is somehow not completely Hitler-esque horror.

Whether I am a mod or not, the same will hold true whether you like it or not.

Biggest lie ever told right there.

 

[Kurdel]

"We have recovered a crashed flying saucer and the alien bodies"

Day after that: "We are sorry about the previous report, it was just a weather balloon"

What seems more likely to you?

A hurried headline based on unverified rumours, or a story calmly written after the fact, with plenty of information?

The biggest lie would be a nice mix of Religion and all Pseudoscience.

Also CAM, Acuponcture, Chiropractic, Traditional Chinese medecine, "Natural foods", Power bands, etc...

 

[Evlar]

Heliocentrism is a theory as valid (or failed) as geocentrism; it's just a matter of perspective. There isn't a single thing that is explained in heliocentrism that can't be explained with geocentrism or vice versa.

I can even say that I am the center of the universe and everything turns around me, and it would be as valid; the rest is just theories. And we already had this discussion, no need to bring it here.

Circles, dude.

 

[meadowrag]

I think its debatable at least that there are a lot of people who's skills and talents don't translate into anything that our current society values highly.

Could it be that our society does value a lack of translatable skills and talents?
After industrialization, our society more or less requires such paltry fodder in order to function.

I can even say that I am the center of the universe and everything turns around me, and it would be as valid

So physics has finally traversed across the entire spectrum, folded back in on itself, and ended up defying logic itself. I have awaited the arrival of this day with interest.

 

[Zaptruder]

Heliocentrism is a theory as valid (or failed) as geocentrism; it's just a matter of perspective. There isn't a single thing that is explained in heliocentrism that can't be explained with geocentrism or vice versa.

I can even say that I am the center of the universe and everything turns around me, and it would be as valid; the rest is just theories. And we already had this discussion, no need to bring it here.

... but everything doesn't turn around you. The planets in the solar system revolve around the sun; the sun revolves around the core of the galaxy... and the galaxy gets pushed out further away from other galaxies in the galaxy cluster, which in turn expands away from other galaxy clusters.

What you're saying, makes it seem as though you've confused the concepts of relativity with centrism.

In which case, that's just stupid.