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BritGAF |OT5| Superb Birds, Absurd Turds and Disturbed Nerds
- Thread starter Mikeside
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Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Well I was about to say "new page, let's never talk about this again" but then that happened ^^^^
Shorty, you're the only other person in here who doesn't want to discuss gloryholes in infant school toilets.
Quick, what's your favourite strategy game and why? Describe in detail so I can block out the filth Cyanide started up in here.
Yeah. We're block-girder-dry-elbow fetishists so we lick bricks and girders too and drink Tabasco from the bottle afterwards. You know, to purge us of our sins.
This feels really creepy, actually. I take back what I said. Can we all go vanilla again please?
I was looking for a couple of books earlier today and ended up in various link spam sites due to keyword magnetism. I do feel that porn might have gone too far when I notice movies by the name of Squirt in my Gape 3 and Lick my Nasty Prolapse.
The traditional sexplay ways of Mikeside welcome all. Leave your disgusting pleasures of the flesh at the door.
Actually, I think I've talked myself down somewhat here, but I'm definitely vanilla compared to you freaks. Especially Jedeye. What's that guy's deal?
Yeah, it's pretty horrific out there & people just get used to it. It doesn't take long before you've lined your hands with razerblades and you're tugging mercilessly along to Undead Nuns Abuse Royal Mail Workers Anally
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
I put my list of games on the other page right in the middle of the Lolita storm. Have a pog!
That's out now? My preorder hasn't come through from Fapflapcity.cum. Dammit.
dapperbandit
Banned
Sploat as much as I like your avatar I feel it is in your best interest to change it considering today's shocking revelations. You might attract unwanted attention otherwise.
Jedeye Sniv
Banned
Dogs can give consent, it's all in their eager eager eyes.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
That's ruff.
I'll just post my games list for all the platforms I played (or still play) often. 2-3 games a platform should be fine for me.
Gameboy
Super Mario Land: 6 Golden Coins
Pokémon Yellow
PS1
Crash Bandicoot 2
Spyro 2: Gateway to Glimmer
Final Fantasy VIII
N64
Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Super Smash Bros
Banjo-Kazooie
GBA
Pokémon Emerald
Final Fantasy Tactics Advance
PSP
Dissidia 012: Duodecim Final Fantasy (talk about a stupid name)
Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions
PS2
Final Fantasy X
Devil May Cry
GTA: Vice City
Gamecube
Super Smash Bros Melee
Metroid Prime
Resident Evil 4
PS3
Metal Gear Rising
Uncharted 2
Ni No Kuni
Wii
Super Smash Bros Brawl
Super Mario Galaxy 2
Xenoblade Chronicles
3DS
Kid Icarus Uprising
Zelda: Link Between Worlds
Luigi's Mansion 2
Vita
Guacamelee
Wipeout 2048
Killzone Mercenary
Wii U
Super Mario 3D World
Wonderful 101
Zombi U
PC
Age of Mythology
Killing Floor
Scribblenauts Unlimited
Disclaimer: There are a large amount of games for PC, PS3 and Vita that I've yet to play. So this is based on what little I've played.
Gameboy
Super Mario Land: 6 Golden Coins
Pokémon Yellow
PS1
Crash Bandicoot 2
Spyro 2: Gateway to Glimmer
Final Fantasy VIII
N64
Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask
Super Smash Bros
Banjo-Kazooie
GBA
Pokémon Emerald
Final Fantasy Tactics Advance
PSP
Dissidia 012: Duodecim Final Fantasy (talk about a stupid name)
Final Fantasy Tactics: War of the Lions
PS2
Final Fantasy X
Devil May Cry
GTA: Vice City
Gamecube
Super Smash Bros Melee
Metroid Prime
Resident Evil 4
PS3
Metal Gear Rising
Uncharted 2
Ni No Kuni
Wii
Super Smash Bros Brawl
Super Mario Galaxy 2
Xenoblade Chronicles
3DS
Kid Icarus Uprising
Zelda: Link Between Worlds
Luigi's Mansion 2
Vita
Guacamelee
Wipeout 2048
Killzone Mercenary
Wii U
Super Mario 3D World
Wonderful 101
Zombi U
PC
Age of Mythology
Killing Floor
Scribblenauts Unlimited
Disclaimer: There are a large amount of games for PC, PS3 and Vita that I've yet to play. So this is based on what little I've played.
dapperbandit
Banned
CHEEZMO;98839429 said:
your avatars exceed all of ours in shittyness
Lemmings because it was somewhat therapeutic seeing those little bastards die in so many different ways. Easiest game in the world too because you didn't need to do anything to see them die and complete the level. Shame the game only had one level...
In somewhat non-nappy related news, I had no idea The Boss re-recorded The Ghost of Tom Joad with Tom Morello. Jesus, this shit is eargasmatic. Shame the scratchy "Bulls on Parade"-esque solo at 6:27 doesn't fit in the song...ugh only thing that awkwardly stands out.
I like the mental image of typing out 'Lick my Prolapse' and then thinking 'wait, it needs something more'...
dapperbandit
Banned
8bit didn't want to confuse us into thinking it was one of those nice prolapses
Rubbish King
The gift that keeps on giving
gonna go get some doritos and dew for games tonight
aww yiss
aww yiss
I think putting the word "nasty" before the word "prolapse" is the very definition of the word 'redundant'
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
I imagine (a worrying amount come to think about it) that some prolapses are worse than others.
If we're talking about a prolapse that is in some way worse than an average, run-of-the-mill prolapse then I think "nasty" would be hugely understating the horrific nature of that prolapse.
Apocalyptic might be a better word.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
I suggest we create a kind of ten-point "prolaptic" scale, if you will.
1) Petit
2) An Organ Turtle
3) Partial
4) Persistent
5) Painful
6) Hunger Games
7) Phaal
8)
9) Life Limiting
10) Apocalyptic
I'm open to suggestions/alterations. I think we could get "Nasty" in there, so long as it was said like the bearded dude from kid's television favourite, Knightmare.
I'm unwilling to define any kind of prolapse as anything less than the bolded.
Yet another reason I'm not an anal kind of a guy.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
How about "Intestinal Maelstrom", "Polly Pocket" or "Gut Gash"?
EDIT: Seems like GAF is having a prolapse. What's the dealio?
I hadn't even heard of prolapsing until my mate showed me some images of it on his phone. I remember there was an embarrassing bodies where the doctors were all standing around staring at this poor woman's prolapsed arse. Looked about a Michael Barrymore's Garden Party on the prolaptic scale. Bordering on life limiting.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Did they poke it with pencils and nod knowingly?
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Righty oh. Back to prolapses.
Musha_Soturi
Member
Hey guys! So what's going on in h............
Bloody hell. I leave you lot alone for 5 minutes.
Well I'm having an awesome holiday, feel like I'm really improving. I've gotten to the stage of doing little tricks now, ollies, 360's and jumps. Might get some video footage hopefully to share with you.
Big quiz tonight, we're feeling confidant
Bloody hell. I leave you lot alone for 5 minutes.
Well I'm having an awesome holiday, feel like I'm really improving. I've gotten to the stage of doing little tricks now, ollies, 360's and jumps. Might get some video footage hopefully to share with you.
Big quiz tonight, we're feeling confidant
Scrape your other first pls - suggest bicycle accident
How are you un-drying your elbows? One of mine is just constantly dry and a little bit discoloured. I'm not sure why it's like that.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
Not my fault. I had nothing to do with it. I was dead at the time etc.
Check you!
I had dead skin on mine, so I used a pumice stone with soap and hot water to get rid of that - did that maybe 2 or 3 times, now I just moisturise them and I've had no issues since.
#manly
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
What happened to you, man? It's like Big Jim Slade died for nothing.
You see him using moisturiser? HE DOESN'T EVEN GIVE A FUCK ABOUT DOORS
NinjaBoiX
Member
Nice one Musha, that's pretty cool!
It's the done thing mate, gotta be all metrosexual and shit these days. I exfoliate too.
I ain't even mad.
Edit: oh, you were specifically talking about elbows. Yeah, I just spread some gunk on my face after I wash, my elbows are pretty much left to take care of themselves.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
We're a few short posts away from discussing who shaves their balls... I can feel it.
Been holding this post until things got a bit quieter in here so it didn't get lost amongst posts. Got a few things on my mind at the moment and I'm sharing them with you in hopes of getting advice and help.
First, a little about myself. Have no friends in Dawlish and very few in Exeter (in fact there are more people in Exeter who I want nothing to do with). My best friend lives in Watford, another close friend lives in Dagenham and other friends live in or near London. If I get into University (which depends on the results of a test I'll have to take) I'll be moving to London in August. If I don't, then I'll start saving up money to move out for next year. As for personality, I'm quiet, shy and get nervous easily. I try my best to be a kind person though. And apparently I'm creative but I don't see that.
I've met a couple of people recently who I've been hanging out with. The catch? They've known each other for a long time. When we meet up, for the most part the two of them are always talking amongst each other. I try to get a word in but it's rather ignored or they acknowledge it and reply before going back to talking to each other. Now I'm not expecting them to talk to me all the time but a little conversation would be nice. I want to be friends with them because they seem like good people but I can't help but feel that they're not giving me that chance.
Which leads me to my next issue. I have a bit of a problem with paranoia. I keep thinking there's some sort of hidden meaning behind what people do or say when it's regarding me. Mostly happens on forums actually, since I make a post that's about something personal, something important or just a question, and when I return to the topic I see that, most of the time, no one's replied to it and they're still talking about whatever they're talking about. I look at it the wrong way and think that they don't want to talk to me for whatever reason. Thankfully I haven't lashed out at anyone over a misinterpretation.
Speaking of lashing out, this is a problem I have. I don't really lash out often at people, in fact the last time I did was early 2010 (two instances. One was at a friend who made a harmless joke when I asked for help and I snapped at him and the other was when someone who I've hated since school made a joke about a friend of mine that had recently died. He knew that it would bother me, he just didn't expect me to lose my temper and attack him. Thankfully I was dragged away before things got really nasty), but I worry about controlling my anger at times, since I feel that it's building up. I sound like the Hulk here but I just worry too much about when and who I'll take my anger out on. I don't want a friend to make a harmless joke that I'll take the wrong way and react badly to.
Finally, this is probably my biggest concern. Keeping things to myself for too long (if I ever share). Been thinking about it recently but I've realised that I haven't really told anyone much about myself. The person who knows the most about me at the moment still doesn't that much about me. Ok sure most of the stuff isn't stuff you'd bring up in a conversation. Even when people ask "Tell me about yourself", I tend to avoid the question or go for the bare minimum. I really don't know why since there's nothing for me to be ashamed of. Ok sure, a lot of depressing stuff's happened, but a lot of uplifting stuff has happened as well.
TL;DR - Issues with talking in a group that I feel doesn't want me involved. I get paranoid at times and take what would be a harmless gesture as something else. I worry about when I'll take my anger out on someone innocent and who it'll be. And I feel that I keep things to myself so much, so people don't really know a lot about me.
And don't worry, I promise this will be my last post like this for a while. Happy Son will be back soon. Even if it means a break from things.
First, a little about myself. Have no friends in Dawlish and very few in Exeter (in fact there are more people in Exeter who I want nothing to do with). My best friend lives in Watford, another close friend lives in Dagenham and other friends live in or near London. If I get into University (which depends on the results of a test I'll have to take) I'll be moving to London in August. If I don't, then I'll start saving up money to move out for next year. As for personality, I'm quiet, shy and get nervous easily. I try my best to be a kind person though. And apparently I'm creative but I don't see that.
I've met a couple of people recently who I've been hanging out with. The catch? They've known each other for a long time. When we meet up, for the most part the two of them are always talking amongst each other. I try to get a word in but it's rather ignored or they acknowledge it and reply before going back to talking to each other. Now I'm not expecting them to talk to me all the time but a little conversation would be nice. I want to be friends with them because they seem like good people but I can't help but feel that they're not giving me that chance.
Which leads me to my next issue. I have a bit of a problem with paranoia. I keep thinking there's some sort of hidden meaning behind what people do or say when it's regarding me. Mostly happens on forums actually, since I make a post that's about something personal, something important or just a question, and when I return to the topic I see that, most of the time, no one's replied to it and they're still talking about whatever they're talking about. I look at it the wrong way and think that they don't want to talk to me for whatever reason. Thankfully I haven't lashed out at anyone over a misinterpretation.
Speaking of lashing out, this is a problem I have. I don't really lash out often at people, in fact the last time I did was early 2010 (two instances. One was at a friend who made a harmless joke when I asked for help and I snapped at him and the other was when someone who I've hated since school made a joke about a friend of mine that had recently died. He knew that it would bother me, he just didn't expect me to lose my temper and attack him. Thankfully I was dragged away before things got really nasty), but I worry about controlling my anger at times, since I feel that it's building up. I sound like the Hulk here but I just worry too much about when and who I'll take my anger out on. I don't want a friend to make a harmless joke that I'll take the wrong way and react badly to.
Finally, this is probably my biggest concern. Keeping things to myself for too long (if I ever share). Been thinking about it recently but I've realised that I haven't really told anyone much about myself. The person who knows the most about me at the moment still doesn't that much about me. Ok sure most of the stuff isn't stuff you'd bring up in a conversation. Even when people ask "Tell me about yourself", I tend to avoid the question or go for the bare minimum. I really don't know why since there's nothing for me to be ashamed of. Ok sure, a lot of depressing stuff's happened, but a lot of uplifting stuff has happened as well.
TL;DR - Issues with talking in a group that I feel doesn't want me involved. I get paranoid at times and take what would be a harmless gesture as something else. I worry about when I'll take my anger out on someone innocent and who it'll be. And I feel that I keep things to myself so much, so people don't really know a lot about me.
And don't worry, I promise this will be my last post like this for a while. Happy Son will be back soon. Even if it means a break from things.
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
How long have you known them? Are they inviting you to places or are you hanging on? Give it some time, I reckon. Reassess later. If the situation doesn't change after that, it may never do.
That's normal, I think, unless I'm paranoid, too... Wouldn't read too much into it, it happens, just go with it.
I can't help with the rest, I'm afraid, I'm massively insensitive and rubbish in social situations.
Hey D.
It sounds like a pretty tough place to be. People aren't easy to fathom at all and even doing the supposedly 'obvious' things like small talk can be ridiculously difficult when you're in an over-analytical frame of mind. I sympathise completely and have a lot of experience of those kinds of situations, but I'm sorry, I don't really have any answers at all. At the moment, I'm about to try (urgh) group therapy to help become more comfortable being open around other people. I can let you know how it goes.
If you want to be all serious about it, that could be one way of working through it (that's what my counsellor recommended for me, anyway). There are other things too, apparently. Being on a forum is probably a good start! There's a website called Meetup which might be good (my counsellor recommended it to me, but I couldn't bring myself to actually go to any).
About the paranoia, that's probably even tougher. I know what it's like to have absolutely crippling paranoia (even to the extent where you have to go into hospital) and I think a lot of it is your own internal narrative picking on you. For me, it's my low self-esteem attacking my confidence, if that makes sense. One way to take it on is to try and lighten your perception of yourself by trying to find something funny about your own behaviour in a situation. Another one is to try and 'forgive yourself'. Both of those came from my counsellor (can you tell!?).
Probably the best advice came from a really old friend of mine (one of my few friends that I've not pissed off or isolated!) - I was going through a really paranoid, low self-esteem phase and he said that a lot of the time when you are thinking people are thinking about you, they're not. They're thinking about themselves. Just like you are thinking about yourself. People spend all day in their own worlds and it's very very unlikely they even spend a moment thinking in detail about someone else's mind. Basically, you could run down the street on fire, and people would look for a second, say "oh, someone's on fire" and then go back to their own little world.
Hope that helps. You're always free to msg me whenever, although I'm probably the worst person to speak to as I spend most of my days in a paranoid state!
Screaming Meat
Unconfirmed Member
That there is excellent advice.
EDIT: not to say the rest isn't, it's just this bit really struck a chord.
NinjaBoiX
Member
Son of D, just imagine everyone is in their pants.
Sorry man, I can't really offer any real advice about that, but Sploat pretty much nailed it. Or how about these immortal lines from Stand By Me:
Gordie - "Do you think I'm weird?"
Chris - Yeah but so what, everybody's weird."
So damned true.
Sorry man, I can't really offer any real advice about that, but Sploat pretty much nailed it. Or how about these immortal lines from Stand By Me:
Gordie - "Do you think I'm weird?"
Chris - Yeah but so what, everybody's weird."
So damned true.
So my Secret Santa was Coldman! Thanks very much!
The Iwata cup says "Please understand" on the back and the Pikachu folds out to be a pillow. Oh and the book is a puberty book called "What's happening to my body?" which I'm sure you can all guess which Nintendo joke that is a reference to.
The Iwata cup says "Please understand" on the back and the Pikachu folds out to be a pillow. Oh and the book is a puberty book called "What's happening to my body?" which I'm sure you can all guess which Nintendo joke that is a reference to.
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