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[nitewulf]

Example #1: Hey guys, I think this girl might like me - she invited me to her Halloween party, we hung out and got along well, and at the end of the night she hugged me goodbye even though we'd only hung out once before and she didn't hug other people goodbye when they left. Should I ask her out?

You know what man, actually my original question phrased how I actually intended it to be should have been, "How do I read the signs?" That's really my actual, specific question.

Cause I touch her every chance I get and we hug every chance we get. Essentially my gut is telling me there's something there, it's my brain that's the problem.

And definitely, definitely don't replay all the small details over and over again in your head and analyze every tiny action. We've already got a guy on GAF that does that.

I don't know who specifically but I think on GAF we have A LOT of those. And yeah, you're spot on I shouldn't over think things.

 

[Llyranor]

Example #2: So there's this girl - I think she might like me. The first time we hung out it was with friends - I didn't really know her that well and there was a lot of us so we didn't get to talk much but I caught her looking at me a few times and she kinda smiled and there was this one moment where she laughed at my jokes and so I had a good time and then I ended up invited to her Halloween party and her costume was really cool and I complimented her on it and she said she liked my costume, but there was kind of a flirtatious tone to how she said it and then even though there were lots of different groups and she was the host she kept coming back to where I was and hanging out with the group I was in and sitting next to me a lot of the time and she was definitely engaging me in conversation like there was this one time where she laughed at something I said and then when I was leaving she hugged me and I hadn't seen her hug anybody else when they were leaving so that's something and she seemed a little disappointe I was leaving and she also said she'd invite me to other parties if she threw them and kind of smiled so does she like me guys also I added her on Facebook and she accepted my friend request like immediately that's a good sign guys right should I ask her out?

This is pretty good. Seems like you're channelling multiple GAFers at once.

You know what man, actually my original question phrased how I actually intended it to be should have been, "How do I read the signs?" That's really my actual, specific question.

Cause I touch her every chance I get and we hug every chance we get. Essentially my gut is telling me there's something there, it's my brain that's the problem.

The problem with 'signs' is that everyone is different. Some people might be friendlier and hug/smile more. Some people might be more touchy-feely with people they have good friendship chemistry without having any romantic interest. Some people might just do it for attention without being serious about it at all. Some people might be interested and just dropping hints, but who can tell the difference.

The best telltale 'sign' is how they answer when you ask them out a date directly and concisely.

 

[Incendiary]

You know what man, actually my original question phrased how I actually intended it to be should have been, "How do I read the signs?" That's really my actual, specific question.

Cause I touch her every chance I get and we hug every chance we get. Essentially my gut is telling me there's something there, it's my brain that's the problem.

Physical contact is usually a good sign - but some people are just touchy-feely with friends, especially if they're drinking. When you're one on one on a date, any sort of physical touching is almost always a go sign. But in a group hanging out, it's a little harder to read. If she's focusing on you and doesn't seem to be doing the same with other friends, it's probably a signal.

 

[Messofanego]

Even though I don't fit the usual mold of people here (I'm looking for a marriage instead of just dating, being a british-pakistani muslim), I thought I'd share details of my date yesterday (we had been talking for a few weeks now on phone and whatsapp):

That was a lot of fun! We had a little coffee at Leicester Square, talked to a 78 year old American lady sitting next to hs who was interested in our date and how she's excited to see Patrick Stewart/Ian McKellan at the theatre tonight, headed off to have a little bubble tea (chuppa, never tried it) and chatted more at Trafalgar Square. Then we also went back home on the same northern line and said bye as she got off on her stop.

Lots of chemistry, and already talking about meeting again. Even gave her a flower for my lateness hehe. Talked a bunch about our assistant psychologist jobs, applying for Clin Psych, helped her install a sleep cycle app cause she's having trouble sleeping, and goofed around how similar we are in being adventurous at the drop of a hat. She's as much into hiking, cycling, and wanting to skydive/scuba dive/parasailing as me. She even likes videogames! I need to show her how far gaming has come since Super Mario World but will leave out The Last Of Us. She even checked out my YouTube page and commented on some videos she watched. She told me about some horror stories of messages she got from other Muslims on the website. Two hours and a half of chatting must be a good sign.

Out of the handful of people I've met, she's been the most compatible. She even confides her work issues to me already. I'm ready to settle down, y'all. I hope her family likes me. She wants a few more meetings before she discusses it with her parents, but my parents are already game to meet hers XD

 

[LucidMomentum]

Even though I don't fit the usual mold of people here (I'm looking for a marriage instead of just dating, being a british-pakistani muslim), I thought I'd share details of my date yesterday (we had been talking for a few weeks now on phone and whatsapp):


Out of the handful of people I've met, she's been the most compatible. She even confides her work issues to me already. I'm ready to settle down, y'all. I hope her family likes me. She wants a few more meetings before she discusses it with her parents, but my parents are already game to meet hers XD

Awesome man! It's nice to hear these stories from people.

My main intention with dating is finding someone to settle down with, but a lot of people I've dated this year seem to be content with just casual relationships or the chance to have me buy them dinner and drinks lol.

Which is fine in my book, especially if I have fun and get to know someone a bit better, but at the same time it feels like when I'm with friends.

There's this barrier there because I know most of the people I've gone out with aren't looking for something deeper, mostly they're just looking for a way to have fun and fuck without feeling "guilty" about it which is a dumb idea anyways because people shouldn't feel guilty about that in the first place.

Like if you just want sex and to have someone to talk to but you don't actually talk about anything meaningful, it's not the best relationship. They're fun but not amazing, ya know?

 

[nitewulf]

Even though I don't fit the usual mold of people here (I'm looking for a marriage instead of just dating, being a british-pakistani muslim), I thought I'd share details of my date yesterday (we had been talking for a few weeks now on phone and whatsapp):

Just be very careful, unless you actually live with someone, you don't really know them. I'm also of a muslim background, though totally atheist...me and my ex wife didn't get a chance to really live together as such because of similar conservative cultural issues and it was a disaster.

 

[gaiages]

Proposed to my GF yesterday with a ring pop. She said yes. Before I get hounded on, I plan to buy a nice wedding band. I just wanted the proposal to be goofy and subdued rather than extravagant like those guys who propose on the jumbotron.

Yay, congrats! Extravagant proposals are lame imo

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

Example #2: So there's this girl - I think she might like me. The first time we hung out it was with friends - I didn't really know her that well and there was a lot of us so we didn't get to talk much but I caught her looking at me a few times and she kinda smiled and there was this one moment where she laughed at my jokes and so I had a good time and then I ended up invited to her Halloween party and her costume was really cool and I complimented her on it and she said she liked my costume, but there was kind of a flirtatious tone to how she said it and then even though there were lots of different groups and she was the host she kept coming back to where I was and hanging out with the group I was in and sitting next to me a lot of the time and she was definitely engaging me in conversation like there was this one time where she laughed at something I said and then when I was leaving she hugged me and I hadn't seen her hug anybody else when they were leaving so that's something and she seemed a little disappointe I was leaving and she also said she'd invite me to other parties if she threw them and kind of smiled so does she like me guys also I added her on Facebook and she accepted my friend request like immediately that's a good sign guys right should I ask her out?

I hope this goes into the next OP.

 

[badboy78660]

Well sheeit, just woke up to this gem of a message this morning.

Sucks. We went on a date past Saturday that went from 3pm-11pm. Thought it went amazingly well. Admittedly I participated in some game-playing by not getting in touch with her again until Tuesday night--tried to give her a call some time after 9:30pm. She didn't pick up the call so I waited and texted sent her a single text the next day. Something to the effect of, "Glad we got together this past weekend, had fun, should do it again...blah blah blah..." I believe her reasoning for the most part though.

 

[samoset]

Hey Dating Age,

My local area has been pretty scarce in terms of online dating, only one or two swipes on Tinder and about 20 or so active people on okcupid. But in the two and a half months since I've been here I've gotten about 3 or so girls numbers from these sites, but have only had one coffee date so far, the other two flaked at the last minute, and the one coffee date no longer will return my texts. I've messaged every girl who's been active in the last month on okcupid, and pof, but needless to say I'm starting to feel pretty hopeless.

I am in grad school, but still don't really know any of the people here, and going from loose acquaintances to asking someone out seems very strange to me. But here I am at 25, having gotten out of a five year relationship, and can't get a coffee date. I know the common advice of find an activity with a bunch of people, but due to my grad school schedule that really isn't all too possible right now, and I'm around a bunch of people anyway due to my activities. I just don't know where to go from here honestly. Do I just ask random girls out who I don't know too well? Because that is all I can think of at this point.

 

[ZackieChan]

Proposed to my GF yesterday with a ring pop. She said yes. Before I get hounded on, I plan to buy a nice wedding band. I just wanted the proposal to be goofy and subdued rather than extravagant like those guys who propose on the jumbotron.

Let me guess - she is a co-worker who you were friends with for years, took to an expensive dinner on your first date and waited a year to touch/have sex? 😉😉😉

Congrats!

Well sheeit, just woke up to this gem of a message this morning.

Sucks. We went on a date past Saturday that went from 3pm-11pm. Thought it went amazingly well. Admittedly I participated in some game-playing by not getting in touch with her again until Tuesday night--tried to give her a call some time after 9:30pm. She didn't pick up the call so I waited and texted sent her a single text the next day. Something to the effect of, "Glad we got together this past weekend, had fun, should do it again...blah blah blah..." I believe her reasoning for the most part though.

What a twist!

It'll be fine. It's all in the game, bro.

 

[names2hard4you]

Well sheeit, just woke up to this gem of a message this morning.

Sucks. We went on a date past Saturday that went from 3pm-11pm. Thought it went amazingly well. Admittedly I participated in some game-playing by not getting in touch with her again until Tuesday night--tried to give her a call some time after 9:30pm. She didn't pick up the call so I waited and texted sent her a single text the next day. Something to the effect of, "Glad we got together this past weekend, had fun, should do it again...blah blah blah..." I believe her reasoning for the most part though.

This had me in stitches

Spoiler

kek I had to

Got a thing setup with a cute girl for Sunday. She is a student, been in the city for 6 months, Brazilian (I am Portuguese so we both basically speak the same language). Going for coffee and board games around noon and if we hit it off we can go eat at one of the numerous Japanese joints around the area. I happen to know those parts well and can show her around. We'll see where it goes!

 

[Astral]

I feel like the classmate I asked out the other day is acting distant. Like trying to avoid eye contact and shit. It's kind of annoying. Maybe she thinks I feel weird about being rejected.

 

[SwipeLeftHoney]

This is a thing.... Dang... GAF ain't playing around here...

 

[Gotdatmoney]

I feel like the classmate I asked out the other day is acting distant. Like trying to avoid eye contact and shit. It's kind of annoying. Maybe she thinks I feel weird about being rejected.

The key is to just keep doing your thing. If she wants to be weird about w/e not your problem. People take the whole rejection/rejecting hing weird. All you can do is just do your normal routine.

 

[Troblin]

So, I've been dating a girl for around two months now.

She is really great, good job, caring, genuine person, etc. The one thing that bugged me was that through the first two months of dating, I was picking her up and paying for everything.

I'm not cheap persay, but I would like a bit more equality in the expenses. I called her yesterday to casually mention that since we were officially dating, we should informally split some dating costs and she seemed seriously offended by the conversation.

Did I done goof GAF?

 

[ZackieChan]

So, I've been dating a girl for around two months now.

She is really great, good job, caring, genuine person, etc. The one thing that bugged me was that through the first two months of dating, I was picking her up and paying for everything.

I'm not cheap persay, but I would like a bit more equality in the expenses. I called her yesterday to casually mention that since we were officially dating, we should informally split some dating costs and she seemed seriously offended by the conversation.

Did I done goof GAF?

Two goofs:
1) You paid for everything for months, thus setting a pattern and an expectation. Depends on the type of girl she is and what her cultural expectations are (maybe she was raised to believe that the man pays for everything?)
2) It's "per se", not persay

 

[Llyranor]

Your only goof was only bringing up the topic of splitting the bill after becoming official.

Maybe she's upset you brought it up because it made her feel cheap. But it shouldn't have had to be brought up in the first place because she should have offered to split or cover some of the expenses at some point in the whole 2 months. Or maybe she's offended at possibly having to spend some money in this relationship. Either way, it is not a good look.

If you end up having a fight over this, remember that this a 2-mo old relationship.

 

[Astral]

The key is to just keep doing your thing. If she wants to be weird about w/e not your problem. People take the whole rejection/rejecting hing weird. All you can do is just do your normal routine.

If she continues this should I say something or just keep leaving it be? I remember this happened with some other girl who I asked out that sat next to me in class. She was weird a couple of classes after that but then we would have the same short conversations as usual. I'm hoping this is the same.

 

[Messofanego]

Just be very careful, unless you actually live with someone, you don't really know them. I'm also of a muslim background, though totally atheist...me and my ex wife didn't get a chance to really live together as such because of similar conservative cultural issues and it was a disaster.

Of course, duly noted.

 

[gwailo]

I'm not cheap persay, but I would like a bit more equality in the expenses. I called her yesterday to casually mention that since we were officially dating, we should informally split some dating costs and she seemed seriously offended by the conversation.

Did I done goof GAF?

Specifically bringing it up was probably a bad move. It would have been better to do a more roundabout way, like asking her to pay for gas on the way to the restaurant. If she continually refuses or gives excuses, then bring it up. Or maybe just try doing things that don't take as much money, like making/eating dinner at home instead of going out. If she's still expecting big "event" dates two months in, you've set the bar too high and need to bring it down a bit. Even if money isn't a problem, those sort of dates become emotionally and physically draining after a while. If you can't just hang out and have a good time, there's not much of a connection there IMO.

If she continues this should I say something or just keep leaving it be? I remember this happened with some other girl who I asked out that sat next to me in class. She was weird a couple of classes after that but then we would have the same short conversations as usual. I'm hoping this is the same.

If she's feeling awkward, you trying to make a conversation specifically about that isn't going to help any. She might think that you're being creepy/pushy by not taking no for an answer. Just move on.

 

[ZackieChan]

If she continues this should I say something or just keep leaving it be? I remember this happened with some other girl who I asked out that sat next to me in class. She was weird a couple of classes after that but then we would have the same short conversations as usual. I'm hoping this is the same.

How about never talking to her again? Seems to be a good strategy.

 

[Astral]

How about never talking to her again? Seems to be a good strategy.

Not possible lol. We're in the same small cohort and kinda work under the same supervisor. We have weekly supervision sessions together. Sure I can stay quiet but that'd be like ignoring her and I don't wanna do that. I'll just behave like I've always been. Like Goddatmoney said, if she's still being weird then I guess that's her problem.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

If she continues this should I say something or just keep leaving it be? I remember this happened with some other girl who I asked out that sat next to me in class. She was weird a couple of classes after that but then we would have the same short conversations as usual. I'm hoping this is the same.

Leave it be. It's not your duty to solve this. She can be weird or she can get the fuck.over it. It really is not your problem.

 

[chicko1983]

My payment guidelines for dates:

First coffee together - I pay for both.
First drink at a bar - I pay for both, suggest she pays for the second round. This is easy to instigate, especially if your having a good time.
First meal - suggest we split the cost.

I always suggest splitting the cost. If she says it's the mans responsibility, or something similar, I don't ever fight it, but are much less likely to call them back.

It sets a bad precedence if she starts expecting you to pay for everything.

My workmates had some drinks together last night. The girl I like asked if I was going and looked and sounded disappointed when I said no. I wouldn't trust myself if I had a few drinks under my belt around her at the moment. I'm sure I would have had a go.

 

[ZackieChan]

We need OCDChewie to weigh in on this. Where's that dude been?

 

[Salamando]

We need OCDChewie to weigh in on this. Where's that dude been?

Coloring and writing posts with length that put dating-gaf's worst to same.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

So, I've been dating a girl for around two months now.

She is really great, good job, caring, genuine person, etc. The one thing that bugged me was that through the first two months of dating, I was picking her up
and paying for everything.

I'm not cheap persay, but I would like a bit more equality in the expenses. I called her yesterday to casually mention that since we were officially dating, we should informally split some dating costs and she seemed seriously offended by the conversation.

Did I done goof GAF?

Man frankly the only L is you didnt bring up the cost thing sooner. But if you have no intention of paying for everything (I sure as hell hope you dont) you were gonna have to address this sooner than later. If she is offended by this then yall need to simply talk about it and state your case. You liked her so you swallowed it to start but you don't really feel you should pay for everything.

If she is mad. Whatever, you aren't East Side Marios, bread aint free son.

 

[Jokab]

Would never play along with a girl actually being upset that I don't want to pay for everything, unless I make way way more than her. Just fuck that noise. She sounds spoiled

 

[Troblin]

Two goofs:
1) You paid for everything for months, thus setting a pattern and an expectation. Depends on the type of girl she is and what her cultural expectations are (maybe she was raised to believe that the man pays for everything?)
2) It's "per se", not persay

Thanks. We're both Asian, so I'm guessing that the cultural expectation may be with the man as the provider. I agree, I think I got too caught up in the initial dating phase and set a poor pecedent by paying for everything initially.

If she were a student it would be one thing, but I know she makes more money than me.
I'll call her tonight and have another discussion. Hopefully, we can work something out because I really like her.

 

[Salamando]

Thanks. We're both Asian, so I'm guessing that the cultural expectation may be with the man as the provider. I agree, I think I got too caught up in the initial dating phase and set a poor pecedent by paying for everything initially.

If she were a student it would be one thing, but I know she makes more money than me.
I'll call her tonight and have another discussion. Hopefully, we can work something out because I really like her.

...do you live in Vancouver? I know I've heard this exact story before.

 

[Troblin]

Man frankly the only L is you didnt bring up the cost thing sooner. But if you have no intention of paying for everything (I sure as hell hope you dont) you were gonna have to address this sooner than later. If she is offended by this then yall need to simply talk about it and state your case. You liked her so you swallowed it to start but you don't really feel you should pay for everything.

If she is mad. Whatever, you aren't East Side Marios, bread aint free son.

Thanks. Yea, I have no intention of paying for everything. If that is the case, I'll go back to being single and work on my video game backlog..lol.

I'd be willing to even do like a 1/3 dates she covers... Something to make it a bit more equitable.. We'll see..

 

[Troblin]

...do you live in Vancouver? I know I've heard this exact story before.

California actually, but I'm guessing the Asian population cultural expectations may be similar

 

[Lone_Prodigy]

There is a "princess" mentality that exists among some women. I remember one Asian couple where the guy spent $500 a month on her.

 

[Pasta_Soup]

That princess mentality is just awful.

About a year ago, I briefly dated a chick who was rather into me - until the dinner bill for our second date arrived at the table and I suggested we split it. She then became extremely quiet and visibly uncomfortable for the rest of the night, before darting out of my car the minute I brought her home.

Texted her an hour or so later telling her I had a nice time, but wondered if she was alright. She then went on to say she was extremely upset that I didn't pay for dinner, and she expects every guy she dates to pay for everything until she's in a committed relationship with them.

I lol'd and that was the end of that shit show.

 

[ZackieChan]

There is a "princess" mentality that exists among some women. I remember one Asian couple where the guy spent $500 a month on her.

That's poor-tier, bro

Thanks. We're both Asian, so I'm guessing that the cultural expectation may be with the man as the provider. I agree, I think I got too caught up in the initial dating phase and set a poor pecedent by paying for everything initially.

If she were a student it would be one thing, but I know she makes more money than me.
I'll call her tonight and have another discussion. Hopefully, we can work something out because I really like her.

I don't think the income difference matters. You may be screwed.

...do you live in Vancouver? I know I've heard this exact story before.

Don't have her invite her friends all out to eat on your dime!

 

[Gotdatmoney]

That princess mentality is just awful.

About a year ago, I briefly dated a chick who was rather into me - until the dinner bill for our second date arrived at the table and I suggested we split it. She then became extremely quiet and visibly uncomfortable for the rest of the night, before darting out of my car the minute I brought her home.

Texted her an hour or so later telling her I had a nice time, but wondered if she was alright. She then went on to say she was extremely upset that I didn't pay for dinner, and she expects every guy she dates to pay for everything until she's in a committed relationship with them.

I lol'd and that was the end of that shit show.

Lol. I hate this type of person. Dating benefits both parties. Don't come at me with this "I gotta prove myself to you" shit. If I need to pay for everything before you feel you are enjoying shit then I wish you a miserable existance cause that shit is not happening.

Thanks. Yea, I have no intention of paying for everything. If that is the case, I'll go back to being single and work on my video game backlog..lol.

I'd be willing to even do like a 1/3 dates she covers... Something to make it a bit more equitable.. We'll see..

Naw man. Split that bitch down the middle. This is dating. You aint long term. You aint a provider and you definitely aint begging to get someone to pay for themselves. Fuck that.

 

[Llyranor]

We're both Asian, so I'm guessing that the cultural expectation may be with the man as the provider.

This is a poor excuse. You never have to put up with princess syndrome. I know I don't.

 

[ZackieChan]

You're all a bunch of damn princesses in this thread!

 

[Femto.]

Hey all,

A girl that I've only known through association (mutual friends in high school), played some online games together years ago (like twice, at most), follow each other on social media, and I have only ran into her and her ex once in person at an anime expo (first time properly meeting, ever.) a couple of years ago.

She hit me up on snapchat a couple of weeks ago, we chatted for a bit, and then I proposed to go out to a bar the following weekend since we have never really hung out before. She said yes, but last week I texted her asking if we could move our plans to the next day (Saturday) because my best bud was moving back in town and I was going to help him move in. She told she couldn't on that day because she was having a Halloween party, so she invites me and I accept. My intent to hangout at first was to get to know her before deciding if I wanted a friendship or something more out of her.

Day of the party comes, she told me she wasn't going to arrive until 11 since she was attending a concert beforehand. I arrive at 10 with a buddy, run into people I haven't seen in at least six years, drink, play beer pong, and have a good time. Her ex was there, the one I mentioned before, so that was a red flag since I know they were together for years.

I didn't run into her until a little after midnight. I was buzzing at this point, we chat for a bit, and then we part ways (I forgot why to be honest).

At some point, we bump into each other, literally, and I ask her how she was doing. She looked exhausted, I offer her a hug, and we embrace for a bit. I then grab her hand (idk why, I was drunk at this point) and we go somewhere quieter to talk. This is where I fuck up, we were near the booze, so I try looking for the beer I brought (it was BYOB). Couldn't find it, took too long (someone probably took the other box), she decides to sit down next to the table, I do nothing other than just look at her, and then a friend of hers sits next to her. I leave at this point because I felt awkward.

Afterwards, I notice that her and her ex are hanging out with each other and other people. I ask one of the guys I knew from high school if they were still a thing, he told me no that they were done a long time ago. I leave it at that, so I stick with the people I was hanging out with for the rest of the night.

At the end of the night, as my friend and I are heading to the front door, she is with her ex walking towards us. Say goodbye to her ex (he introduced himself to me at the beginning of the party so I felt like it was appropriate lol), then to her and then hug her. I text her the next day, thanking her for inviting me. She responds saying she was glad I had good time, I text her back, and she doesn't reply.

Her birthday is tomorrow, we usually wish each other happy birthday. Where do I go forward from here? If it is even worth it.

I know, I know, make your intentions clear at the beginning. I haven't, but I like to do it in person and I got too drunk for my own good to do it on Saturday.

 

[gwailo]

Another wall of text with nothing real behind it.

Please just see the title of the thread.

 

[Femto.]

Another wall of text with nothing real behind it.

Please just see the title of the thread.

Alright, I deserve this response lol

I realized it half way through and posted it anyway, just needed to vent I guess.

 

[NoctisVsStar]

There is a "princess" mentality that exists among some women. I remember one Asian couple where the guy spent $500 a month on her.

Fuck that noise! 500? I said damn lol, I'll say this though... Maybe it's a Hispanic thing but if I ask you out then I got you no questions asked ( unless she insists and gets mad okay we'll split ) .. if I woman asks me out we split. That's how I've always operated.

Whenever I ask someone out I got the bill unless otherwise.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

I know, I know, make your intentions clear at the beginning. I haven't, but I like to do it in person and I got too drunk for my own good to do it on Saturday.

1. Today is like friday. So why didnt you do anything any of those days in between then and now.

2. Just ask her out.

Fuck that noise! 500? I said damn lol, I'll say this though... Maybe it's a Hispanic thing but if I ask you out then I got you no questions asked ( unless she insists and gets mad okay we'll split ) .. if I woman asks me out we split. That's how I've always operated.

Whenever I ask someone out I got the bill unless otherwise.

I don't even agree with if I ask you out I pay. She isn't doing you a favor by going on the date. You don't need to pay for herjust cause you asked. All it implies is "thank you so muh for letting me take you out as though I'm begging and you get norhing out of it". She has rhe agency to say no then she can also pay.

I'm not a meal ticket and you shouldnt be either.

 

[Afrocious]

I miss this thread, but I have a love/hate relationship with it because of what I feel this thread reflects about myself.

 

[Femto.]

1. Today is like friday. So why didnt you do anything any of those days in between then and now.

2. Just ask her out.

1) To be honest, dating isn't at the top of my priority list right now, and it hasn't been for the past six months. Been focusing on bettering myself so I am not actively seeking it, but if it crosses my way I'll take a chance, which is how I see this. If it helps, I'm in my senior year of college trying to maintain my GPA, and my best friend just moved back in town last weekend from living out of state for three years. Before he left I distanced myself away from him, so I'm trying to improve that shit first. So far so good, trying to improve other aspects of my life as it isn't really attractive not having your shit together. At least that is how I see it.

2) I'll hit her up tomorrow. (It is still Thursday night where I am.)

 

[PureYeti]

Well just came in here to say after 5 years of searching. Nov 3rd is a start of new relationship for me and my girl. Wish me luck guys!

 

[Golgo 13]

Man.... asked a girl out at work and got turned down.

A bit of backstory -- I'm older (38) have had many girlfriends in my life, and usually am very good about telling if a woman is interested. This girl showed every single sign of interest I can think of -- always coming to sit down and chat with me at my desk at work (which she doesn't do with anyone else in a work environment full of males), I constantly catch her staring at me, she's always finding excuses to touch me, she laughs hilariously at all my jokes, Etc etc etc. Everything was there.

I asked her to lunch on both of our days off and she said "I'm really busy and I'm already going out to lunch with a girlfriend, you can come if you'd like". Of course I just laughed and said "no thank you". It's kind of a wobbler.... because she DID invite me to go with her, but in my experience a girl who's interested will almost always follow up with "Well, what about (another day)"?

So I feel like I should just leave it be. She's also kind of different in a way because she's Ukrainian (been in the US for a few years only). She could also just be an attention whore, I don't know. Never been in this situation before.

 

[Lulubop]

Since the online thread is pretty much dead I guess I'll post my stuff here.

 

[IC5]

Even though I don't fit the usual mold of people here (I'm looking for a marriage instead of just dating, being a british-pakistani muslim), I thought I'd share details of my date yesterday (we had been talking for a few weeks now on phone and whatsapp):

That was a lot of fun! We had a little coffee at Leicester Square, talked to a 78 year old American lady sitting next to hs who was interested in our date and how she's excited to see Patrick Stewart/Ian McKellan at the theatre tonight, headed off to have a little bubble tea (chuppa, never tried it) and chatted more at Trafalgar Square. Then we also went back home on the same northern line and said bye as she got off on her stop.

Lots of chemistry, and already talking about meeting again. Even gave her a flower for my lateness hehe. Talked a bunch about our assistant psychologist jobs, applying for Clin Psych, helped her install a sleep cycle app cause she's having trouble sleeping, and goofed around how similar we are in being adventurous at the drop of a hat. She's as much into hiking, cycling, and wanting to skydive/scuba dive/parasailing as me. She even likes videogames! I need to show her how far gaming has come since Super Mario World but will leave out The Last Of Us. She even checked out my YouTube page and commented on some videos she watched. She told me about some horror stories of messages she got from other Muslims on the website. Two hours and a half of chatting must be a good sign.

Out of the handful of people I've met, she's been the most compatible. She even confides her work issues to me already. I'm ready to settle down, y'all. I hope her family likes me. She wants a few more meetings before she discusses it with her parents, but my parents are already game to meet hers XD

Will this be a long engagement? or are you saying that you two will be getting married, after a few dates?

I realize there is probably a lot of culture and tradition, feeding into this. But, if at all possible, I would encourage you to have a long engagement, at the least. Or even more simply, dating someone for quite awhile. Hopefully your culture allows room for that.