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[IC5]

I was seeing this girl for like a month, we met up like twice for movies it went right and we talked quite a lot during that time. Then I went to Canada for a week and I asked her if she was using tinder she said she deleted it and not to worry about it. Couple days ago just curios I checked up her profile and it was updated with a new description and news pics and I got supper pissed. It made me feel like a plan b and told her that and she apologize about it but til this day i say something and dlesbt reply and I know she is online on whatssap cus I can see last time online and she goes online quite often.

I am done trying for this girl and just gotta focus on my weigh loss and going to the gym

There seems to be a fairly common idea here (on this forum/in this thread) that we shouldn't check on people and we shouldn't express demands/boundaries/requests, before some intangible waiting period. I'm going to speak against that.

People have been checking on people for decades and the reason to do that is A. to make sure you don't get "hurt" (ambiguous usage) 2. to avoid putting effort into a no win situation. To avoid stress. Being able to identify ways to obtain information like that, are exactly what our big brains are for. Because we are physically soft and relatively weak. I mean, how many times has someone asked an associated party, if the guy or girl you are interested in, is currently seeing anyone? What sort of person are they? do they do crazy stuff? etc.

Additionally, 3 dates and sex, is a fairly classic milestone to start setting up boundaries and requests. Regardless, a person can request exclusivity or anything else, whenever they want. If the other party offers mutual agreement, then it is absolutely ok to be upset (to some degree) if that mutual response is tarnished somehow.

In your case iBlue, she lied to you, about something which is important to you, for how you wanted to operate, in dating her. And you caught her lie. You didn't do anything shady or invade her privacy. You utilized a public resource. A social (media) resource. Which she knows you have access to. There is a lot which can be said about this. One of which is that, she lied about something which you can easily check on and she would have no way to stop you and no idea you had even done it. So, she doesn't really care about holding onto you. She told you not to worry about it, hoping that you would be her little bitch.

She was not honest about her status with you. and it sounds like you two even had a fairly substantial conversation about it, before. Which underlines the problem for you.

Your relationship to her, did not last long or go very deep. So, at this point, what you should do/should have done, is leave her be (or if appropriate, tell her that you aren't interested in seeing her anymore), and move on. The problem behavior by you, was not that you checked on her. What you did wrong, is that you continued to message her and continued to track her activity. And it sounds like you may have even said some negative things to her. Probably fueled by some low level anger and/or jealousy. That is the unhealthy part of this.

Ignoring people is the super callous trend of 2016. And nothing says, more loudly, "I do not care about you". And you can treat yourself better, than that. Do it, by moving on.

There is a girl I like quite a bit I see at the gym a lot, we are both going there regurlarly but never talked to, I want to but do know if this is good idea and how can I do that :/

Again, I will speak against others: Talk to her. Say hello. How do we meet people? We leave our private living space and go to places where there are other people.

Sure, don't blatantly interrupt her while she's in the middle of a set or making a hard cardio effort. But,if she is clearly on a rest break, or stretching, at the water fountain, staring at her phone, or some other fairly docile gym behavior like that----you can totally try to talk to her. Don't let others here, tell you that you can't talk to her. If she doesn't want to talk to you, she will tell you, somehow. (with direct words, body language, indirect words, etc).

You may not have chance to get in a substantial conversation. But, saying hello, having a little introduction, that can be a ticket for future interaction. You may see here there, again, and have an opportunity to say hello, again. This time, using her name. Maybe even recalling something from last time. If this repeats, she might actually open up for a decent conversation. But, maybe not. However, if you are able to say hello to her a couple times, maybe just skip trying to talk to her and ask if she will meet for coffee or something. A place where conversation can be the activity, rather than the interruption.

I pretty much watched such a thing happen in real time, recently. At the gym I use. After a couple of days of saying hi and being a recognizable face----this guy and girl started working out together. The girl sought work out tips and pretty soon, they were purposefully meeting at the gym, to work out together. And then, they started hanging out, away from the gym.

This is how life works.

 

[Miles Quaritch]

Too many words for saying something as simple as - She lied, you feel disrespected, it's time to move on but that doesn't mean you have to be a creep and stalk her online.

And for all the talk of her lying, poster lied about not using Tinder any more too, but that's fine because I'm sure he was only using it to check if she was lying...

 

[ZackieChan]

Too many words for saying something as simple as - She lied, you feel disrespected, it's time to move on but that doesn't mean you have to be a creep and stalk her online.

And for all the talk of her lying, poster lied about not using Tinder any more too, but that's fine because I'm sure he was only using it to check if she was lying...

He's truly a gentleman - "I banged her"

 

[Gotdatmoney]

There seems to be a fairly common idea here (on this forum/in this thread) that we shouldn't check on people and we shouldn't express demands/boundaries/requests, before some intangible waiting period. I'm going to speak against that.

People have been checking on people for decades and the reason to do that is A. to make sure you don't get "hurt" (ambiguous usage) 2. to avoid putting effort into a no win situation. To avoid stress. Being able to identify ways to obtain information like that, are exactly what our big brains are for. Because we are physically soft and relatively weak. I mean, how many times has someone asked an associated party, if the guy or girl you are interested in, is currently seeing anyone? What sort of person are they? do they do crazy stuff? etc.

In your case iBlue, she lied to you, about something which is important to you, for how you wanted to operate, in dating her. And you caught her lie. You didn't do anything shady or invade her privacy. You utilized a public resource. A social (media) resource. Which she knows you have access to. There is a lot which can be said about this. One of which is that, she lied about something which you can easily check on and she would have no way to stop you and no idea you had even done it. So, she doesn't really care about holding onto you. She told you not to worry about it, hoping that you would be her little bitch.

She was not honest about her status with you. and it sounds like you two even had a fairly substantial conversation about it, before. Which underlines the problem for you.

Your relationship to her, did not last long or go very deep. So, at this point, what you should do/should have done, is leave her be (or if appropriate, tell her that you aren't interested in seeing her anymore), and move on. The problem behavior by you, was not that you checked on her. What you did wrong, is that you continued to message her and continued to track her activity. Probably fueled by some low level anger and/or jealousy. That is the unhealthy part of this.

Ignoring people is the super callous trend of 2016. And nothing says, more loudly, "I do not care about you". And you can treat yourself better, than that. Do it, by moving on.

They went on 2 dates. The level of investment should be low here. The mistake he made was saying he was going to delete tinder after 1 date. She lied which is shitty but they barely fucking know each other. One date and you're already buying into the requests of someone you flat out dont know? People aint saying he cant look her up, they're saying given the info he provided it's weird for him to be so pissed and it is. He can do w/e he wants but it's more reflective on him than it is on her.

2 dates over a month is nothing.

Again, I will speak against others: Talk to her. Say hello. How do we meet people? We leave our private living space and go to places where there are other people.

You ever actually talk to women about guys approaching them at the gym?

Don't let others here, tell you that you can't talk to her.

He's asking for advice and people are using their life experience to give him an answer. Fuck are you on about "dont let these people tell you what to do" son? He should let you tell him what to do instead?

I pretty much watched such a thing happen in real time, recently. At the gym I use. After a couple of days of saying hi and being a recognizable face----this guy and girl started working out together. The girl sought work out tips and pretty soon, they were purposefully meeting at the gym, to work out together. And then, they started hanging out, away from the gym.

No one is saying you cant make something positive out of approaching at the gym. They are saying people really do not like to be bothered there. And women especially are more likely to feel uncomfortable when men hit on them at the gym. Again. I dunno if you actually gym a lot of talk to women but no, they don't really like being approached there.

This is how life works.

If you werent a junior I would love for you to make a thread about approaching women at the gym. Just to emphasize that you really do not grasp what we are saying.

You can make "anything" work because life is unpredictable. I have seen bitch made guys get the woman simply by begging over and over. I have seen guys who hover over a girl hoping she falls for him actually end up getting that girl on rare ocassion.

The reality of this thread and those situations is "So what". We are not offering a solution to every single individual problem. No one here is saying alternate methods cant work. Individuals are using their personal experiences to help advise on what they found works and does not work. I dont care that you have an alternate opinion. I have an issue that you're playing this holier than thou shit. Please.

 

[tearsofash]

There's a girl at church that messages me literally every day at the same time.

What do I do?

 

[IC5]

Too many words for saying something as simple as - She lied, you feel disrespected, it's time to move on but that doesn't mean you have to be a creep and stalk her online.


And for all the talk of her lying, poster lied about not using Tinder any more too, but that's fine because I'm sure he was only using it to check if she was lying...

I don't need you to edit me.

 

[ZackieChan]

There's a girl at church that messages me literally every day at the same time.

What do I do?

Reply to her?

There's almost no useful information in this post, btw.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

There's a girl at church that messages me literally every day at the same time.

What do I do?

Ask on a date.

 

[Ray Wonder]

There's a girl at church that messages me literally every day at the same time.

What do I do?

What does she say

 

[artsi]

There's a girl at church that messages me literally every day at the same time.

What do I do?

What's the message dude

 

[Ray Wonder]

"Can I interest you in a lesson about Jesus"

 

[Gartooth]

This isn't a break-up. You're not even dating.

there's nothing to break up. just move on

You went on three dates. There's nothing to breakup from. You had literally nothing between you. Don't send her anything.

Thanks for the advice and saving me the hassle.

 

[FLAguy954]

She just messaged me if I want to hang out with her this weekend, wut? What the hell is happening.

I thought you were going to block her. Please move on.

This. Delete her number and move the fuck on Djostikk.

 

[IC5]

You ever actually talk to women about guys approaching them at the gym?



He's asking for advice and people are using their life experience to give him an answer. Fuck are you on about "dont let these people tell you what to do" son? He should let you tell him what to do instead?



No one is saying you cant make something positive out of approaching at the gym. They are saying people really do not like to be bothered there. And women especially are more likely to feel uncomfortable when men hit on them at the gym. Again. I dunno if you actually gym a lot of talk to women but no, they don't really like being approached there.



If you werent a junior I would love for you to make a thread about approaching women at the gym. Just to emphasize that you really do not grasp what we are saying.

You can make "anything" work because life is unpredictable. I have seen bitch made guys get the woman simply by begging over and over. I have seen guys who hover over a girl hoping she falls for him actually end up getting that girl on rare ocassion.

The reality of this thread and those situations is "So what". We are not offering a solution to every single individual problem. No one here is saying alternate methods cant work. Individuals are using their personal experiences to help advise on what they found works and does not work. I dont care that you have an alternate opinion. I have an issue that you're playing this holier than thou shit. Please.

its nuts to me, to tell people "no", to some of the best opportunities. I personally feel it is better to give tips on how to approach these situations, sensibly. That's when you get details.
Where is the good/proper place to approach someone you are attracted to? Must one be restricted only to bars/clubs, sites/apps, or one-off outings where you saw a person randomnly?

I think a lot of people would agree that school is a good place to meet people. But there are plenty of ways to do that wrong. and they aren't that dissimilar to a gym class or an open gym environment.

I don't have a study to cite for you, but Women probably don't like the way they are usually approached, at the gym. Not necessarily the simple fact that they are at the gym. Women don't like the way they are often approached----anywhere. Online dating is meant for being prospected, yet Women probably get some of their worst correspondence while online. With each setting, comes challenges and considerations. But there are usually some sensible ways to approach people.

to speak very generally, respect space, time, and feelings = you will probably have a good interaction. Will it result in a date? who knows....unless you try. and you try, at the places where you and the other person, are at.

 

[gaiages]

Can I ask for some of u folks to rate my pics? I known theres a thread for it but Id like to send a PM and ask for advice on some other small stuff too

Sure, you can PM me.

EDIT: lol IC5 I'm not going to say your advice is wrong, but it it speaks of you not really understanding social experiences. Of course there are exceptions to every rule, but generally the rules are there for a reason.

 

[Salamando]

The only time I'd consider asking a girl out at the gym is as they were leaving. Anything else, I'm interrupting their plan or causing them to unintentionally cool down. Besides, I'm at the gym to kick ass...don't want to interrupt my training either!


And "checking on people" using Tinder or whatsapp is a good thing? Please. It'll only feed your insecurities and help you create false narratives. If you don't trust a girl enough to have deleted her profile that you need to check on it, you shouldn't yet be exclusive with her. Yes, she proposed it, but you went along with it. Making a habit of it...well, that's how you end up at a bar checking the traffic reports to see if there's a good explanation for her running late...

 

[Lulubop]

I would love to see what anyone who lives in the NYC area and actually has success on Tinder looks like. I swipe right on everyone, yet only get perhaps one match every 2-4 weeks, and the girls who match me are *well* below me in terms of looks. It's crazy.

I know the obvious response is "you must not look as good as you think you do," but that would be an incorrect assumption. I do look a lot better in real life than in pics (many girls have told me this), but my pics are still in the 7.5 range. Yet the one or two girls per month (per month!) that I match with are in the 5-6 range. And I'm swiping right on hundreds of people when I'm watching TV and stuff lol. It's bizarre. I'd love to see what someone who fairly frequently matches with girls who are 7+ looks like.

I live in nyc and I do extremely well on Tinder! Come to the next gaf meet up haha

 

[Gotdatmoney]

its nuts to me, to tell people "no", to some of the best opportunities.

Exain what makes it the best opportunity? This a fluff statement without context.

I personally feel it is better to give tips on how to approach these situations, sensibly. That's when you get details.

You're free to feel that way. But I am not going to pretend I think something is a good idea just because saying "no" is "nuts". Again. How many women have you talked to about being approached at the gym? This is a simple question.

Where is the good/proper place to approach someone you are attracted to? Must one be restricted only to bars/clubs, sites/apps, or one-off outings where you saw a person randomnly?

Join a club? Play a sport? Attend a local meet up? Volunteer at an event? Use a dating app. Have a friend set you up? Go on a trip and strike up conversation? Should I keep going or? Like I said, your logic implies there are no bad places or bad ideas because "who knows"?

I think a lot of people would agree that school is a good place to meet people. But there are plenty of ways to do that wrong. and they aren't that dissimilar to a gym class or an open gym environment.

There is a real issue with women feeling comfortable in the gym. You can maybe do as I said and just ask them.

I don't have a study to cite for you, but Women probably don't like the way they are usually approached, at the gym. Not necessarily the simple fact that they are at the gym.

Have you decided this for yourself or have you actually asked women? Maybe read up. Don't project.

Women don't like the way they are often approached----anywhere. Online dating is meant for being prospected, yet Women probably get some of their worst correspondence while online. With each setting, comes challenges and considerations. But there are usually some sensible ways to approach people.

Again, what this amounts to is there is never a wrong place wrong time. There often is. That's just reality. Do you think its a good idea to ask your boss on a date? Do you ask for dates at funerals? How about the doctors office? I am pro trying but not every place calls for interaction.

to speak very generally, respect space, time, and feelings = you will probably have a good interaction. Will it result in a date? who knows....unless you try. and you try, at the places where you and the other person, are at.

So again. Is there no place you think is off limits to hitting on someone (and make no mistake, it will be obvious to the girl he is hitting on her?

 

[Miles Quaritch]

I'm interested in IC5's advice on how to talk to someone who has their headphones on.

Can't let any opportunity slip through your fingers right? Take a chance, it might change your life...

 

[Llyranor]

And for all the talk of her lying, poster lied about not using Tinder any more too, but that's fine because I'm sure he was only using it to check if she was lying...

Oh man, this is gold.

I'm interested in IC5's advice on how to talk to someone who has their headphones on.

Can't let any opportunity slip through your fingers right? Take a chance, it might change your life...

Same way you interact with a girl reading a book on public transportation. You pull off their earphones, and insert yourself inside their personal space to assert your dominance. If she ignores you or is being dismissive, you get offended (I just wanted to say hi!!!) and start insulting her, or make her worry for her safety.

 

[ZackieChan]

Oh man, this is gold.


Same way you interact with a girl reading a book on public transportation. You pull off their earphones, and insert yourself inside their personal space to assert your dominance. If she ignores you or is being dismissive, you get offended (I just wanted to say hi!!!) and start insulting her, or make her worry for her safety.

I usually throw up a middle finger over the page they're reading. Something about my stubby fingers really turns the ladies on.

 

[dreamcastmaster]

I think a lot of people would agree that school is a good place to meet people.

Thanks for this amazing suggestion. The rest of your "advice" reads like over analysis theory and no practice.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Thanks for this amazing suggestion. The rest of your "advice" reads like over analysis theory and no practice.

I obviously do not agree with him but you pulled that quote out of context.


Anyway. Some of the women Dating Agers should weigh in on this. All the women I have talked to dont like it when they are approached at the gym. They all said dont want to feel like they are being watched or observed while they work out.

Frankly I think that is entirely valid

 

[Gray Matter]

I live in nyc and I do extremely well on Tinder! Come to the next gaf meet up haha

You think I can go 2/2 lol

 

[gaiages]

Anyway. Some of the women Dating Agers should weigh in on this.

I really didn't want to talk about it because I thought it was common sense that you don't really want to butt in on peoples' personal space even when in a public space (do you stop people jogging on the sidewalk to talk to them just because they're outside?), but clearly it isn't to some people and I'm just grumpy enough to write a huge ass post about it, so here we go.

So like, I'm a lady (supposedly, WHO KNOWS ON THE INTERNET), that goes to the gym regularly to lift heavy as fuck stuff. I also frequent a bunch of lady oriented fitness forums ( /r/xxfitness being my fave), so I feel I have a decent understanding of what women have to deal with in the gym.

It can be hard AS FUCK for a lady (especially an overweight one) to get into the gym in the first place? Why, you may ask? Body image issues and misinformation. They're afraid to go into the gym because they think everyone will be looking at them, silently judging. Granted, this thinking is the case with overweight men as well, but you also have to factor in the very real societal pressure of the "ideal" female body and why so many people feel inclined to really comment on a woman's weight for whatever the fuck reason.

So say you're a lady and you manage to get past all that and go into the gym to get fit. You're good, right? God, no. Lots of women think that the only way to get thin is cardio, and that weight lifting will make you look like a She-Hulk (which is generally genetically false, a woman needs to really fuck with their body to look like that). It also doesn't help that most weight areas are populated by "lift bros" that seem like a generally cocky bunch (note that that's just the perception, most lift bros I've met and talked to are pretty nice and helpful dudes). This is more where the misinformation comes into play, that a woman feels like she "doesn't belong" in certain areas of the gym.

And all of this is before a potential "nice guy"/interrupter comes into play. While a lot of these misconceptions are slowly being stomped out, they are still very much in play when it comes to workout time, and it really, really doesn't help when other people butt into your workout.

When I'm at the gym, I generally what to be as invisible as possible. I am not there to socialize, I'm there to lift heavy (for me, it's honestly not that heavy yet >.>), get my aggression out, and go back to work. I am on a time limit. I am not there to entertain someone lifting a 5lb dumbbell twice every five minutes.

For the vast majority of the time, I am not bothered. But, I'm also extremely lucky with my gym--maybe it's because it's a national chain, but in my gym's free weight area there's people of all shapes, ages, and genders there, trying to workout and no one gives two fucks about anyone else. Also, as bad as this sounds, I'm still pretty damn overweight, and let's face it, if people in the gym are going to hit on someone it's not going to be the pudgy one

But I can pull up pages upon pages of stories on xxfitness of women getting constantly bothered at the gym. Being hit on (and the men being disrespectful as fuck when turned down), being told they're doing the wrong exercise and they have too much muscle, unsolicited help with form when they've been lifting for multiple years, people straight up trying to grab asses, men staring at women through their entire workout all creepy-like, etc. It is an IMMENSELY uncomfortable thing, and it plays back to what I was talking about earlier, a sense from the woman that they "don't belong there".

The results of these problems vary, too--a lot of women switch to other gyms, hoping to have a less skeevy atmosphere. Still others just give up on going in general, falling into their own insecurities and societal pressures. The most dedicated just build their own home gyms, but that's obviously not a solution for everyone.

It really sucks, but tbh it's not different from what women have to deal with in public in general. Not being the right weight, right body type, wearing clothes too skimpy/not skimpy enough and constantly receiving comments on it and getting unsolicited cat calls and shit... it's just another factor in always having to be aware of your surroundings and wary of strangers--you never know which one's gonna be the crazy ass rapist.

TL;DR - No, don't approach people at the gym and for fuck's sake, learn to respect people's personal space

 

[Bruce Springsteen]

I obviously do not agree with him but you pulled that quote out of context.


Anyway. Some of the women Dating Agers should weigh in on this. All the women I have talked to dont like it when they are approached at the gym. They all said dont want to feel like they are being watched or observed while they work out.

Frankly I think that is entirely valid

approaching women at the gym? have we really sunk that low?

 

[names2hard4you]

Not to mention if you aren't there tickling weights you will be sweaty as heck, and panting like you ran a marathon. Chances are you don't smell that great either, and frankly even if you don't stink, the gym does.

Sounds very attractive right?

Oh and for the love of God, if you do wanna talk PLEASE get up from your bench/machine/put the weight away. This is my biggest pet peeve. I wanna do bicep curls or w.e body part I'm working on, and some dude is talking to someone about how lit his night was, all while stepping on the weight so no one takes it away. PLEASE.

 

[FyreWulff]

There is a girl I like quite a bit I see at the gym a lot, we are both going there regurlarly but never talked to, I want to but do know if this is good idea and how can I do that :/

You're going to be about the 60th person bothering that woman at the gym today. If you want to meet gym people then put that you like going to the gym on your online dating profile.

My friends find it so annoying that they'll wait until I have free time so I can go to the gym with them so people won't try to talk to them. And even then we still have peeps getting aggress about it

 

[Gotdatmoney]

TL;DR - No, don't approach people at the gym and for fuck's sake, learn to respect people's personal space

Thanks for adding persoectivw. This is pretty much what I have found to be the case with the women I know and the gyms I have been to.

My personal most hated shit is whenever I hear guys saying "why are you wearing make up, you're here to lift".

Motherfucker you cut the sides of your shirt to where it is barely clothing. How the fuxk are you out here talm bout the proper way to look while working out?

I've had to tell more than a few friends to stop being stupid over that stuff.

approaching women at the gym? have we really sunk that low?

Hey man, I'm on team leave them the fuck alone.

The only time I can remember talking to someone I didnt know at the gym is when a girl asked me how to use a machine. Otherwise I just wanna do my shit with my beats on.

 

[gaiages]

Thanks for adding persoectivw. This is pretty much what I have found to be the case with the women I know and the gyms I have been to.

My personal most hated shit is whenever I hear guys saying "why are you wearing make up, you're here to lift".

Motherfucker you cut the sides of your shirt to where it is barely clothing. How the fuxk are you out here talm bout the proper way to look while working out?

I've had to tell nore than a few friends to stop being stupid over that stuff.

You somehow misquoted, but yeah, I don't get how people care about how others look at the gym. Like Christ bro/sis focus on your own shit

 

[names2hard4you]

I love it when dudes come in with regular clothes on. Designer jeans, designer shirt. Heck one time I even saw someone with sunglasses on. Some people go to gym thinking it's a club lol. How can you not judge these people

 

[ZackieChan]

approaching women at the gym? have we really sunk that low?

I've started sending letters to female prisoners

 

[Ray Wonder]

Depends on if she's eyeing me tf down. If I'm pumpin weights and she's like woah, I'll go say something.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

You somehow misquoted, but yeah, I don't get how people care about how others look at the gym. Like Christ bro/sis focus on your own shit

Oh. Fixed

And honestly its just lift bros being lift bros. My response to them is always "They have already made the step to get out here and work out, are you trying to discourage them or are you just the perfect gym specimen that all must attain? Oh and take off you goify ass toe shoes if you wanna talk about looks"

I love it when dudes come in with regular clothes on. Designer jeans, designer shirt. Heck one time I even saw someone with sunglasses on. Some people go to gym thinking it's a club lol. How can you not judge these people

I honestly dont care. There are people that prob think I look douchey when I wear muscle shirts. It just seems like an endless circle of "you look goofy. No you look goofy"

 

[Miles Quaritch]

*snip*

Wait, you mean I can't hang around all creepy like until you're engaging in docile gym behaviour and then try to talk to you?

I mean, why not? You're not working out at that point, you're not busy, so you should be open and willing to talk to me and entertain my coming onto you. It doesn't have to be a conversation, it can just be a hello, how are you and meet me here for coffee at this time? If you don't want me to talk to you, you can just tell me to go away after all.

On a more serious and slightly disturbing note, I find it hilarious that no-one picked up on ICS seemingly admitting to creeping on a couple at the gym. Watching them interact in and out of the gym...

 

[Krauser Kat]

Wait, you mean I can't hang around all creepy like until you're engaging in docile gym behaviour and then try to talk to you?

I mean, why not? You're not working out at that point, you're not busy, so you should be open and willing to talk to me and entertain my coming onto you. It doesn't have to be a conversation, it can just be a hello, how are you and meet me here for coffee at this time? If you don't want me to talk to you, you can just tell me to go away after all.

On a more serious and slightly disturbing note, I find it hilarious that no-one picked up on ICS seemingly admitting to creeping on a couple at the gym. Watching them interact in and out of the gym...

i work out at this bouldering gym that also has weights and sometimes i feel a bit weird waiting for a turn on the wall watching these fit as fuck girls climb it. People are always there to just climb with friends or get in a work out. There is so much time to talk about hey you can put your hand there and its easier shit.

i let people keep their space, it only takes one person to make a space no longer feel safe for you to be in. I meet a ton of new women at figure drawing, both models and artists. I have seen so many of them get attacked like chum in the water by some of the nerdier guys, and have them never come back.

If i want to talk to women i go to a bar or a club or use apps.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

Let's put it this way: I probably wouldn't even be interested in a girl who heads to the gym in order to engage in docile gym behavior and send flirtatious signals to men.

I've been hit on once at my gym. The guy was all, "that's such heavy weight you're lifting, need a spot." It was flattering, sure -- and I realized that, if I wanted and were so inclined, apparently I attract really fit men -- but I really just wanted to get my squat on.

Also, bbl. Going to the gym.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

Wait, you mean I can't hang around all creepy like until you're engaging in docile gym behaviour and then try to talk to you?

I mean, why not? You're not working out at that point, you're not busy, so you should be open and willing to talk to me and entertain my coming onto you. It doesn't have to be a conversation, it can just be a hello, how are you and meet me here for coffee at this time? If you don't want me to talk to you, you can just tell me to go away after all.

Lolololol

On a more serious and slightly disturbing note, I find it hilarious that no-one picked up on ICS seemingly admitting to creeping on a couple at the gym. Watching them interact in and out of the gym...

This honestly may not be as bad as it seems. At my gym minimally I go enough that I notice all the regulars at that time and who talks to who or is with who. It wouldnt take much for me to notice a regular with a new person or 2 regulars working out together.

Its kinda w/e. Like one of the regulars at my gym started working out with her daughter recently. You see the people enough that I dont find it strange you notice stuff like that. I find it more weird that he is inferring stuff from it.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

I just want to browse GAF between sets. Don't judge and/or flirt me.

 

[LucidMomentum]

I just want to browse GAF between sets. Don't judge and/or flirt me.

Hey dumbbell, want some cardio after your weight lifting?

 

[Gotdatmoney]

I bet dating age benches 3 plates as a warm up.

 

[gaiages]

I bet dating age benches 3 plates as a warm up.

I wish I could bench one plate ._. Stupid ass heavy ass bar

 

[Salamando]

Hey dumbbell, want some cardio after your weight lifting?

Nah man, everyone knows the best thing after weights is protein

 

[Gotdatmoney]

I wish I could bench one plate ._. Stupid ass heavy ass bar

In time haha. When I first started i was weak as fuck. Especially for a guy. I was only doing maybe 75lb on bench.

Eventually you just keep at it and you improve. That's the best part of the gym imo. Put in work see real results.

Spoiler

I will never bench 3 plates ever lmao.

 

[names2hard4you]

Hey just do what you can. I today suffer from tendonitis because of my stupidity when I was younger, during my high school days. My wrists and elbows are all screwed up because I wanted to impress the girls back then, lifting the heavy stuff. Now look at me, if I don't wrap up my joints and ice them after, I'm in for a world of pain.

 

[LucidMomentum]

I bet dating age benches 3 plates as a warm up.

2 plates both sides / 225 lbs is my max. 3 reps post workout to confirm I can do it anytime.

Girls see the dad bod and assume I'm out of shape though.

I wish I could bench one plate ._. Stupid ass heavy ass bar

Bar is 45, still nothing to scoff at for most.

No lie, when I took that friend of mine rock climbing (stare at the booty, no regrets) we tried bench presses too. She could only do the bar but it was fun showing off.

I hadn't benched my max in months though so I was super sore the next day.

Nah man, everyone knows the best thing after weights is protein

Depends on if he's trying to tone down or bulk up.
Either way I can tailor the post-workout workout to his needs, ya know?

Spoiler

Pls respond.

 

[DJ Lushious]

Quick question for DatingGAF. I sent a message to someone on an online dating site, liking what their profile was about (and, of course, their attraction level). I get a positive response back (yay!), but the reply basically ends with this (paraphrasing out of respect for privacy):

My subscription ended, but somehow I'm still able to reply. If that stops, here's my email address if ya wanna chat.

Email swapping seems a bit... forward straight out of the gates. Though they bring up a valid point. What if they can't reply? So far, they do want the conversation to carry on. Do I message them through the site or email? I certainly won't know when they can't respond via the site.

And yes, I realize I am way overthinking this.

 

[Gotdatmoney]

2 plates both sides / 225 lbs is my max. 3 reps post workout to confirm I can do it anytime.

Girls see the dad bod and assume I'm out of shape though.

Nice nice. I'm workimg up to 2 plates. Slowly anyway. At 195 lbs currently but for 3 reps I can do 205 lbs.

Dad bod is misleading haha. All those power lifters can do crazy weight and they aint cut at all. I have a really slim frame so size shows more but I pretty much will max out at 2 plates before I start to look stupid

 

[Miles Quaritch]

What site is it? And how is it forward? You weren't going to ask for her for some contact details?

How many messages do you think need to exchanged before you share details?

 

[Salamando]

Quick question for DatingGAF. I sent a message to someone on an online dating site, liking what their profile was about (and, of course, their attraction level). I get a positive response back (yay!), but the reply basically ends with this (paraphrasing out of respect for privacy):



Email swapping seems a bit... forward straight out of the gates. Though they bring up a valid point. What if they can't reply? So far, they do want the conversation to carry on. Do I message them through the site or email? I certainly won't know when they can't respond via the site.

And yes, I realize I am way overthinking this.

Assuming it's eHarmony or something like that?

Play it straight. Continue chatting via the site. If she stops responding, try the email.