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[soultron]

I've heard this shit so much in my life. What people don't understand is that I've spent most of my life alone. I'm sick of it. I've never really had many friends or people who to spend time with, growing up. Things have improved vastly over the years. I went from being very introverted to Mr. Social.

I can be content by myself but its not enough. Over time I get bored, lonely and eventually upset. My work, hobbies and friends can only fulfill me so much. I need balance. All the balls have to in the air

IIRC, you've had a few times where you were self-sufficient. They were brief, since you've not spent much time single, however. Perhaps that's the reason: you're not comfortable alone because you've not spent a lot of your adult life that way?

PXG, I respect you, so please don't take this as me trying to say that I'm right and you're wrong about the way you, yourself, feel.

 

[number47]

I've heard this shit so much in my life. What people don't understand is that I've spent most of my life alone. I'm sick of it. I've never really had many friends or people who to spend time with, growing up. Things have improved vastly over the years. I went from being very introverted to Mr. Social.

I can be content by myself but its not enough. Over time I get bored, lonely and eventually upset. My work, hobbies and friends can only fulfill me so much. I need balance. All the balls have to in the air

Or just more friends. How can one call himself Mr. Social yet still not have at least other friends offering others to meet you? Basically....join a dance class or whatever, meet more women,or focus on your career. You are already wasting too much energy thinking of others.

 

[-PXG-]

Or just more friends. How can one call himself Mr. Social yet still not have at least other friends offering others to meet you? Basically....join a dance class or whatever, meet more women,or focus on your career. You are already wasting too much energy thinking of others.

That's the thing. I'm sick of things being about me all the time. I'm sick of being told to be more selfish. I can be a very selfish and narrow minded person. I've worked hard to fight against that and put others first. I'm tired of having rely on myself for my own peace of mind and happiness. I've always relied on myself for that. I put a lot of effort in reinventing myself over the years. There is no way I am going back to how I used to be.

I don't need more friends. I need better friends. For most things, I'd take quality over quanitity.

Overall, I'm fine. I want to be great. I don't want to settle for anything. "Good enough" isn't good enough.

 

[soultron]

I'm tired of having rely on myself for my own peace of mind and happiness.

You're all you've really got when you're in between women.

 

[Hypereides]

My new "girlfriend" has ignored me for the past two days and flaked on me the last time that we were going to hangout.

She hasn't communicated anything to me so I have no idea what is even going on. She updates her statuses on Facebook and replies to other peoples comments but wont say a word to me.

Not to mention I go back to Lincoln tomorrow night for school and we were supposed to spend the weekend together, yet she hasn't texted or called me. Nothing.

Back to the drawing board it seems soon. Oh well, at least I know I can get a girlfriend after getting my heart crushed by the ex. confidence booster if anything

Not interested. Dont delete her, but ignore her. Reverse the power advantage. She certainly sounds young and immature.

She'll come crawling back at some point if youre patient and clever enough.

hey GAF..so im a 2nd year college student home for winter break and i decided to fb nessage this girl i knew about 5 years back..we used to have a big circle of friends and usually all hung out as a group during summers but that decreased less and less as we went to different high schools..so we were always friends but never too close. here's the convoy:

*disclaimer, the names are fake

me: hey sarah! how've you been?

her: hi mike! been doing pretty well, how about yourself?

me: i've been doing pretty awesome..college is deff much harder as a sophomore but im keeping up thank God haven't talked to u in a while but glad to hear you're doing well..is college everything u expected?

btw, you look stunning in your profile pic ;p

her: good to hear all is well,college is pretty much what i've expected so far, which is nice and awe lol why thaank you mike!

soo..I want to casually ask her to lunch/dinner without coming off as creepy and without gettong ffriendzoned immediately ha..any advice as to where to go next?

Not interested. Youve got an uphill battle but if you know your stuff you might attract her.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Scored a girl yesterday, 21, junk in the trunk, looks innocent, nice teeth set (something I find oddly attractive in the oppesite sex) and lovely soft but girly voice. She's completely into me, and it bothers me because I made a new years resolution about no women this year, and I intedn to stick to it. Probably gonna break it to her next time I see her.

 

[soultron]

Scored a girl yesterday, 21, junk in the trunk, looks innocent, nice teeth set (something I find oddly attractive in the oppesite sex) and lovely soft but girly voice. She's completely into me, and it bothers me because I made a new years resolution about no women this year, and I intedn to stick to it. Probably gonna break it to her next time I see her.

Why are you doing this, exactly?

 

[number47]

That's the thing. I'm sick of things being about me all the time. I'm sick of being told to be more selfish. I can be a very selfish and narrow minded person. I've worked hard to fight against that and put others first. I'm tired of having rely on myself for my own peace of mind and happiness. I've always relied on myself for that. I put a lot of effort in reinventing myself over the years. There is no way I am going back to how I used to be.

I don't need more friends. I need better friends. For most things, I'd take quality over quanitity.

Overall, I'm fine. I want to be great. I don't want to settle for anything. "Good enough" isn't good enough.

whats wrong with being selfish. all you have is yourself at the end of the day. and you are getting too worked up on having a S.O. if you force it ,it won't work. unless you get a mail order bride.

 

[-PXG-]

whats wrong with being selfish. all you have is yourself at the end of the day. and you are getting too worked up on having a S.O. if you force it ,it won't work. unless you get a mail order bride.

Of course I can't force it. Just gotta let things happen. Still, that doesn't change what I want

 

[Danielsan]

Had a great night out with friends last night. Somewhere along the line a friend of mine bumped into a lady friend of his and quickly decided to be cute and introduce me as a fantastic single guy, with a heavy emphasis on me being single, after which he immediately bailed. Now usually this is a recipe for disaster. I don't know happened yesterday but after roughly one minute we were dancing and making out. A bit surreal. Fifteen - twenty minutes later she randomly decided to bail with what sounded like a poor excuse to get out. I shrugged it off and figured I fucked up somehow, maybe I'm a shitty kisser, who knows.
Anywho I had my fun and joined up with my friends again.

At the end of the night she walked back up to me, we kissed for a bit, and then she put her digits in my phone and left.

So I just send her a text asking her if she would like to grab a drink sometime soon to which she replied `Sounds good! " So I guess I might be going on a date soon. Any tips on how to approach a date with someone who you've already kissed, but with whom you've never really exchanged more than 10 sentences?

 

[soultron]

Any tips on how to approach a date with someone who you've already kissed, but with whom you've never really exchanged more than 10 sentences?

The physical is out of the way, so now you just need to do the "is this girl worth my time" portion. See if you can hold a conversation and see if you're attracted to who she is as a person.

Just take her out and see if she's a good time, really.

 

[hipgnosis]

So I guess I might be going on a date soon. Any tips on how to approach a date with someone who you've already kissed, but with whom you've never really exchanged more than 10 sentences?

Approach it like a normal date. Start from zero basically. It might be easier to go for the kiss at the end of a date though. If the date goes well I'd probably go for the kiss at the end of the first date. Usually I hold on to the second.

 

[barnone]

How will I find out if the girl enjoyed the first date? Should I text or should I wait for her? I thought it was pretty enjoyable for what that's worth.

 

[soultron]

How will I find out if the girl enjoyed the first date? Should I text or should I wait for her? I thought it was pretty enjoyable for what that's worth.

Set up a second date. If she's interested and she had fun the first time, she'll be excited and want to see you again.

If she says no, gives excuses, or flakes on you, there's your answer.

 

[Eggo]

That's the thing. I'm sick of things being about me all the time. I'm sick of being told to be more selfish. I can be a very selfish and narrow minded person. I've worked hard to fight against that and put others first. I'm tired of having rely on myself for my own peace of mind and happiness. I've always relied on myself for that. I put a lot of effort in reinventing myself over the years. There is no way I am going back to how I used to be.

I don't need more friends. I need better friends. For most things, I'd take quality over quanitity.

Overall, I'm fine. I want to be great. I don't want to settle for anything. "Good enough" isn't good enough.

You exhibit a lot of qualities of someone who is co-dependent.

 

[soultron]

You exhibit a lot of qualities of someone who is co-dependent.

Sounds like he's okay with that. He's admitted to it.

 

[Drealmcc0y]

Oh god I am so bored on Sunday nights. I need a girl.

There is this girl at work who I get on quite well with usually. In fact I declared I liked her about a month ago and she said she liked me too but was too busy because of her two jobs during Christmas.

There are times when things are not so great between us though(although I think the pressure of work and the work environment not being a great place to talk is a factor) but there are times when we get on really well(like yesterday).

I think I need to step up and ask her out. I am new to "dating" in general but the idea of me saying "hey you wanna go for a drink" sounds so foreign to me and generally not something that would interest me.

 

[barnone]

Set up a second date. If she's interested and she had fun the first time, she'll be excited and want to see you again.

If she says no, gives excuses, or flakes on you, there's your answer.

The answers are always simple haha. Thanks.

 

[Hypereides]

Why are you doing this, exactly?

Mysoginism? Self-loathing? Is the chase better than the catch?.. or some such other cliched masculine bullshit. Im digusted by my decission but Im not unhappy about it. Some times its what you need.

Fucking hope I die of cancer some day... or maybe bow out like Hunter S. Thompson. At the moment I dont need the fun.

 

[soultron]

Mysoginism? Self-loathing? Is the chase better than the catch?.. or some such other cliched masculine bullshit. Im digusted by my decission but Im not unhappy about it. Some times its what you need.

Fucking hope I die of cancer some day... or maybe go out with a bang like Hunter S. Thompson.

It seems like your pride is making you disregard a good opportunity.

Here you are throwing it away when so many others in this thread would love to have it.

 

[Cubsfan23]

PXG, you will always be miserable if you rely on other people for internal things


attachment = suffering

 

[Hypereides]

It seems like your pride is making you disregard a good opportunity.

Here you are throwing it away when so many others in this thread would love to have it.

My penis wants to be homeless for a while. I concure to its wishes.

 

[Idde]

PXG, you will always be miserable if you rely on other people for internal things


attachment = suffering

How can you live your life without getting attached to other people? Having (good) friends and nice people around you is what makes life worth living. Becoming dependent on one person/girl isn't right, but personally I wouldn't know what to do without some of my friends/family.

 

[TurboLibre]

IIRC, you've had a few times where you were self-sufficient. They were brief, since you've not spent much time single, however. Perhaps that's the reason: you're not comfortable alone because you've not spent a lot of your adult life that way?

PXG, I respect you, so please don't take this as me trying to say that I'm right and you're wrong about the way you, yourself, feel.

Humans are social creatures that crave companionship, whether we like it or not. Telling someone who is lonely to buck up and learn how to be happy by themselves is like telling a starving man they can't eat. It's not really a decision someone can consciously make and it'll take it's toll on anyone in the same position no matter how happy their lives are. I even remember you writing similar posts a couple months back. It is great to know how to enjoy your time alone, but that can only last for so long.

How can you live your life without getting attached to other people?

Not well. And I'm saying this from personal experience.

 

[Ultima_5]

How can you live your life without getting attached to other people? Having (good) friends and nice people around you is what makes life worth living. Becoming dependent on one person/girl isn't right, but personally I wouldn't know what to do without some of my friends/family.

I don't think that's exactly what he was meant. Pretty sure he simply means that you can't rely soley on others completely for your happiness which it sounds like pxg is doing. You have to be happy by yourself before someone would want to be with you. Having to be such a key part of someone's happiness and well-being is pretty intimidating. Especially early in a relationship. People want to be around happy people. They don't want to be the only thing that makes them happy. to much responsibility

 

[NeOak]

People want to be around happy people. They don't want to be the only thing that makes them happy. to much responsibility

If you are happy, people are drawn to you. If you need someone to make you happy, people will notice and then they will be drawn to the one that makes you happy, but otherwise most likely won't be drawn to you.

 

[soultron]

.

 

[Ultima_5]

If you are happy, people are drawn to you. If you need someone to make you happy, people will notice and then they will be drawn to the one that makes you happy, but otherwise most likely won't be drawn to you.

I think we're agreeing... If not, I have pronoun confusion. For example, I had this friend who always needed to be in a relationship or else she was extremely unhappy. She's had about 10+ boyfriends (which seems exceptionally high for a 20/21 year old). Me and her got broken up with around the same time, and within a day of finding out I was single started to try to get in a relationship with me despite knowing me for atleast a year and never showing any prior signs of interest. Despite being single, I knew well ahead of time that it would be an awful relationship filled with clingyness so I said no. Within a week she was dating some other guy. People need to learn to be self sufficient and happy outside of a relationship, otherwise the opposite sex will smell it on you

 

[TurboLibre]

Outright saying, "I'm sick of relying on myself for my happiness" isn't something you typically hear someone say. Still, that's the way PXG feels and I'm not going to deny him that.

Also, I'd like to see the posts where I said similar stuff. I get lonely too, but I'd never say such things like PXG since we're not very similar when it comes to the issue at hand. I'm more of a lone(r) wolf and, within reason, tend to love my alone time.

It was a while back when you said you're starting to feel the sting of single life. That you were starting to miss having a girlfriend and were beginning to get lonely. I believe you said you've been single for three months by that point. I actually discussed that post with you and you related to what I was saying. You weren't at the same level as PXG but it was starting to get to you. It's not a bad thing at all, my point is we all get this way if you've been alone for too long. It's easy to act like you don't need anyone when you're finding success, but when you're actually in that situation things start to change.

Edit: It's not about relying on someone else for happiness, really. It's more about having some sort of validation. I'm far from the type that needs others to feel good about myself, but the constant lack of affection or any sort of love starts to make me feel like I don't belong. If that makes any sense. I can't speak for PXG on that one, his reasons are probably completely different, but I still relate to what he's saying.

 

[NeOak]

I think we're agreeing...

We are

 

[Dartastic]

I'm starting to really wonder where something is going, and I figure I might as well ask GAF for advice to really make sure what I'm thinking is correct. So I started seeing this girl in early October, who is really great. We get along fantastic, blah blah blah. So anyway, we've been dating since then, but we've only been seeing each other like, once or twice a week, tops. We also haven't slept together yet, in fact, it's been all above the belt. This admittedly, doesn't really bug me this much as she hasn't been in many relationships, and hasn't slept with too many people.

So about a week ago, I went ahead and told her that I really did like her, and that I was wondering where things were going. I also told her that I wasn't necessarily interested in dating other people anymore, and that I kinda just wanted to date her. She said she liked me a lot too, but that she was dating other people. I figured as much, and I told her that I didn't necessarily mind, as I kinda assumed as much. Yeah.

So anyway, I'm starting to get a little irritated at this, not necessarily because she's dating other people, but because I don't want to date other people right now, and because we've been dating for at least three months now. I do like her quite a bit, but I also have some other prospects that I'm not calling specifically because I want to see how this goes.

What I'm thinking is that I should probably call these other girls, and just go get coffee with them and keep it light, and by the end of the month I need to have a serious talk with the girl I really like (because by then it'll be four fucking months of dating) and ask her what is going on and where we are going. I mean, that's totally respectable, right?

 

[DualShadow]

I'm starting to really wonder where something is going, and I figure I might as well ask GAF for advice to really make sure what I'm thinking is correct. So I started seeing this girl in early October, who is really great. We get along fantastic, blah blah blah. So anyway, we've been dating since then, but we've only been seeing each other like, once or twice a week, tops. We also haven't slept together yet, in fact, it's been all above the belt. This admittedly, doesn't really bug me this much as she hasn't been in many relationships, and hasn't slept with too many people.

So about a week ago, I went ahead and told her that I really did like her, and that I was wondering where things were going. I also told her that I wasn't necessarily interested in dating other people anymore, and that I kinda just wanted to date her. She said she liked me a lot too, but that she was dating other people. I figured as much, and I told her that I didn't necessarily mind, as I kinda assumed as much. Yeah.

So anyway, I'm starting to get a little irritated at this, not necessarily because she's dating other people, but because I don't want to date other people right now, and because we've been dating for at least three months now. I do like her quite a bit, but I also have some other prospects that I'm not calling specifically because I want to see how this goes.

What I'm thinking is that I should probably call these other girls, and just go get coffee with them and keep it light, and by the end of the month I need to have a serious talk with the girl I really like (because by then it'll be four fucking months of dating) and ask her what is going on and where we are going. I mean, that's totally respectable, right?

IMO 3 Months is enough time to know whether or not you want to date someone exclusively. You should keep dating your other prospects though, you shouldn't feel the need to commit to her if she doesn't know what she wants.

 

[Dartastic]

IMO 3 Months is enough time to know whether or not you want to date someone exclusively. You should keep dating your other prospects though, you shouldn't feel the need to commit to her if she doesn't know what she wants.

That's exactly what I'm thinking. I want to date HER, and that's why I told her that I'm not necessarily interested in dating other people. However, I definitely don't want to waste my time or screw other stuff up because this girl doesn't necessarily know what she wants. I almost am starting to wonder if I'm like, getting strung along or something while she explores her options. I don't necessarily think that's the case, but it feels like that sometimes. :/

Edit - Just called one of the other girls to go get coffee. Might as well. Got voicemail.

 

[barnone]

Set up a second date. If she's interested and she had fun the first time, she'll be excited and want to see you again.

If she says no, gives excuses, or flakes on you, there's your answer.

Got the number two. Thanks again.

 

[soundahfekz]

That's exactly what I'm thinking. I want to date HER, and that's why I told her that I'm not necessarily interested in dating other people. However, I definitely don't want to waste my time or screw other stuff up because this girl doesn't necessarily know what she wants. I almost am starting to wonder if I'm like, getting strung along or something while she explores her options. I don't necessarily think that's the case, but it feels like that sometimes. :/

Edit - Just called one of the other girls to go get coffee. Might as well. Got voicemail.

Don't waste your time with her. Three months as others have said is more than enough time to know if you should be seeing each other exclusively. On top of that she's not putting out? Have you been covering a lot of the dates when you do see each other?

 

[soultron]

Got the number two. Thanks again.

Great news. Best of luck on your second date!

 

[Dartastic]

Don't waste your time with her. Three months as others have said is more than enough time to know if you should be seeing each other exclusively. On top of that she's not putting out? Have you been covering a lot of the dates when you do see each other?

Yeah. I definitely haven't been covering a lot of the dates, or even some of the dates. It's usually been pretty split, and sometimes she actually winds up paying for me, even though I try and keep things split or sometimes pay.

She's not putting out because she hasn't been with many people, and she just got out of a five year relationship this summer in like, July. It's not necessarily the lack of sex that bothers me right now, but it's the lack of understanding where it's going. I could deal with waiting for sex if I knew she wanted to date me exclusively. That's why I'm thinking I should give it until the end of January. If she can't make up her mind by then, I really should be out.

I'm really interested in what some lady gaffers think. Maybe I should cross post in that other thread? What's it called again?

Edit - I should also state that last time we hung out she went below the waist. So uh, yeah. I just... really like her. It's not that I haven't dated my fair share, it's just I haven't dated many people I've actually really liked. Bleh.

 

[soundahfekz]

Yeah. I definitely haven't been covering a lot of the dates, or even some of the dates. It's usually been pretty split, and sometimes she actually winds up paying for me, even though I try and keep things split or sometimes pay.

She's not putting out because she hasn't been with many people, and she just got out of a five year relationship this summer in like, July. It's not necessarily the lack of sex that bothers me right now, but it's the lack of understanding where it's going. I could deal with waiting for sex if I knew she wanted to date me exclusively. That's why I'm thinking I should give it until the end of January. If she can't make up her mind by then, I really should be out.

I'm really interested in what some lady gaffers think. Maybe I should cross post in that other thread? What's it called again?

Edit - I should also state that last time we hung out she went below the waist. So uh, yeah. I just... really like her. It's not that I haven't dated my fair share, it's just I haven't dated many people I've actually really liked. Bleh.

At least you got a bit of action, hah.

If you really like her, just keep your options open and be willing to consider dating someone else. Regardless of analysis, its pretty clear that she doesn't feel she's found what shes looking for or she wouldn't continue to date other men. 3 months is a long time to be indecisive AND still be seeing other people.

 

[threenote]

Nvm

 

[TheSchwab_7]

Well it looks like I'm single again. She was also in a relationship with her ex boyfriend while she was with me. Same guy she said cheated on her five times. So I ended it and really don't even care. Her loss really. Classes start tomorrow which means new girls to go after Already got a girl who wants to go on a date with me too.

 

[-PXG-]

I don't give a fuck if I'm "co-dependent". So what? No one on Earth is entirely self reliant, or at least, wants to be. I'm not ashamed to say that others can help me improve and make me a better person. Honestly, to say that you don't need anyone to make you happy or help you in your life is a sign of great arrogance, denial and immense ego. I ain't less of a man admitting that I like having a woman around. That's how I am. I like having someone special. Sure, I can live without it and be content on my own, but who wants to live life just settling for something that is just alright? I can be happy and entertain myself to an extent, but at some point I need to spend time with someone who is more than just a friend. That shouldn't be too hard to understand. I've always told people in this thread to do what works for them, what makes them comfortable and what will ultimately, make them happy. That's why I do for myself everyday.

Anyway, it's amazing what an entire day of spending time with a good friend, drinking beer and kicking ass in Gears can do. I feel like a boss.

 

[RelentlessRolento]

probably not the right place to post this, but relevant (from the funny pic thread):

It feels that way, but never really is. It's always more simple or more complicated, in either a good or bad way ^_^

Life isn't so straight forward like that, which is awesome.

 

[Eggo]

I don't give a fuck if I'm "co-dependent". So what? No one on Earth is entirely self reliant, or at least, wants to be. I'm not ashamed to say that others can help me improve and make me a better person. Honestly, to say that you don't need anyone to make you happy or help you in your life is a sign of great arrogance, denial and immense ego. I ain't less of a man admitting that I like having a woman around. That's how I am. I like having someone special. Sure, I can live without it and be content on my own, but who wants to live life just settling for something that is just alright? I can be happy and entertain myself to an extent, but at some point I need to spend time with someone who is more than just a friend. That shouldn't be too hard to understand. I've always told people in this thread to do what works for them, what makes them comfortable and what will ultimately, make them happy. That's why I do for myself everyday.

Anyway, it's amazing what an entire day of spending time with a good friend, drinking beer and kicking ass in Gears can do. I feel like a boss.

The reason codependency is bad is because it's unhealthy and unsustainable. If your ultimate goal is doing what works and makes you happy, your current course is not going to get you there because you have a problem but don't even realize it.

I had a friend who was codependent, and it was sad to watch. She gave 150% of herself in relationships but ultimately ended up poisoning her romantic relationships by being too nice and selfless. The other party loses all respect for her, leaves/cheats/gets bored, and she plays the victim/martyr, then the whole cycle starts over again. If you're in denial that this is unhealthy, how do you expect things to improve?

There's a big difference between wanting a relationship and needing one.

 

[mj1108]

Haven't had a chance to put this here since for the last 3-4 weeks I've been a mess.

The woman I met back in August who I had posted about here dumped me -- only because she said she's lost feelings. Everything had been going great for the last 4 months. She was fine one day and the next - WHAM - lost feelings. She also says she doesn't want to see anyone and the idea of having a boyfriend is "repulsive".....but now she wants us to be best friends.

I know everyone would say to just cut contact with her but it's been easier said than done since me and her are in the same close-knit circle of friends who run and cycle together.

This just fucking sucks as everything was going so well. Sigh.

 

[Sanky Panky]

Yeah. I definitely haven't been covering a lot of the dates, or even some of the dates. It's usually been pretty split, and sometimes she actually winds up paying for me, even though I try and keep things split or sometimes pay.

She's not putting out because she hasn't been with many people, and she just got out of a five year relationship this summer in like, July. It's not necessarily the lack of sex that bothers me right now, but it's the lack of understanding where it's going. I could deal with waiting for sex if I knew she wanted to date me exclusively. That's why I'm thinking I should give it until the end of January. If she can't make up her mind by then, I really should be out.
.

Seems more like a case of newfound freedom for her after 5 long ass years (first bf?), and she doesn't want to get tied down again yet.

Keep having fun, but don't see it as more than that.

 

[Drealmcc0y]

So I just straight up asked this girl I had been crushing on for a while out.

I was driving away from work and then I thought fuck it I am going back to ask her.

She seemed to like that I did that but the thing is... I think I just got rejected.

She told me to add her on facebook instead of her phone number(uh-oh) and then she told me that she is pretty happy with her life at the moment(UH-OH)

We have a history where in the past she told me she liked me but she was pretty busy over christmas with 2 jobs and would be more free after Christmas..... but I am fairly sure I just got rejected.

 

[threenote]

Our fourth date is today, and I wanted to surprise her with a single pink rose. Yay or nay?

I'm positive she has very strong feelings for me.

Edit: she was nearly crying on the phone last night because her friend died. I figured a rose would be a nice gesture.

 

[radioheadrule83]

So I just straight up asked this girl I had been crushing on for a while out.

I was driving away from work and then I thought fuck it I am going back to ask her.

She seemed to like that I did that but the thing is... I think I just got rejected.

She told me to add her on facebook instead of her phone number(uh-oh) and then she told me that she is pretty happy with her life at the moment(UH-OH)

We have a history where in the past she told me she liked me but she was pretty busy over christmas with 2 jobs and would be more free after Christmas..... but I am fairly sure I just got rejected.

Shoulda said "I'm not happy with your life at the moment... not enough me" or something. Actually no, avoiding cheese is good. I'd add her on Facebook as she says and maybe see how it goes, but I'd definitely also take it as a cue to allow my eyes to gaze elsewhere and look for other options.

 

[CherryWoodFuton]

Our fourth date is today, and I wanted to surprise her with a single pink rose. Yay or nay?

I'm positive she has very strong feelings for me.

Edit: she was nearly crying on the phone last night because her friend died. I figured a rose would be a nice gesture.

Your presence alone most likely will make her feel better but a rose wouldn't hurt. Just be a good listener when you're with her.

 

[threenote]

Me personally I would take her out to a nice dinner or do something she would like to cheer her up but that's just me...

Yeah I might end up doing that, but I figured a single pink rose wouldn't hurt.

 

[LordPhoque]

I need some kind of advice on my situation with this girl. Quick summary :

1-New girl at my student job, she's obviously into me (huge signs of interest, always come towards me, compliments me and ask about my personal life) I noticed her from the beginning so I find her interesting and attractive too
2-We chat a little but it's a busy job so we don't have a lot of privacy
3-So I ask her out pretty quickly, she was obviously waiting for it, answers yes ("whenever you want" with a big smile) but since she just got a new cellphone she doesn't know the number yet, takes mine instead.
4-A week pass (I only work two days a week), she doesn't call
5-This morning at work, first I've seen her since I asked her out. She's still always coming towards me, it gets flirty but I don't mention the fact that she didn't call. It's like I never asked except she's still showing signs of interest (her behavior towards me and other guys are totally different)

From my experience when girls don't want to go on a date they just answer something like "why not" "maybe next week", or simply no, but she was glad I asked so I'm really confused. When I left this morning she said "see you tommorrow", and when I said I wasn't working she looked extremely upset, like she was mad at me, it was very odd.

I must admit I'm kind of upset by it even though I didn't mention it. I screwed up a date with a girl I have no interest in but that could have been a one night thing just because I was distracted by it. Should I bring this up next time I see her ? I do find this extremely disrepectful and rude.