Sorry if I'm just picking up these two phrases you wrote out of the whole post, but they feel like blanket statements that I believe you should think over for a bit. Basically, fanservice and moe are not the same thing. You hear K-On! being called moe all the time since it basically amounts to cutesy girls hanging out, and the show isn't centered in sexualizing the characters at all. Of course some shows might throw moe and fanservice together for quick and easy profits, but that doesn't mean they're one and the same.
The biggest problem with anime series (and the source material that often spawns them) is that many people jump into the "me too" bandwagon and begin creating carbon copies of what's hot right now with little regard for the quality of the content (ie: VR worlds being all the rage right now in anime). Still, this isn't an issue that only the anime industry has, since we far too often end up saying the same things about all kinds of media: dudebro brown shooters, CGI explision-fest movies, Whatevercraft, Flappy Bird clones, etcetera.
That doesn't mean that you can't find good media amidst the flood of faulty doppelgangers, but it's true that the obvious cash-grabs might get more exposure since fitting the "flavor of the month" is basically their only claim to fame, and pushing them as hard as possible is the only way to make some quick cash before the fad changes to something else.
No harm done; I know full well the dangers of generalization. But in the case of moe, I don't feel like sentiments are very far off.
What you're saying has merit; the problem isn't with shows with little girls in and of themselves (I watched a lot of
Cardcaptor Sakura when that was on the air here..granted I was a young teen then). It's the ones that run rampant with the questionable exploitation of them in a perverted way, clearly aimed at adult males. And then, to top it off, don't have very good stories or characters when you remove the moe component.
True, fanservice isn't really the same thing, but wouldn't a lot of "true" moe essentially qualify as fanservice? It's still there to sexually please the viewer. Very possible to be put off by both while still understanding their differences.
For example I tried getting into an anime called
Freezing (not moe, not based on the very little I've seen) at one point. Yeah, I saw some pictures of the main character, busty and all, but that wasn't an issue especially as I read an overview and thought "this could be a cool sci-fi fighting anime". Besides other respectable fighting shows have some of the same thing going for themselves;
Bleach and
Tenhou Tenge for example.
Then I see the villain get butt-naked in the first episode as her armor breaks and have to more or less put it in the "nope" pile. I certainly don't mind some nudity, but make sure it's there for a valid reason. I could already see what kind of show it was gonna be and figured if I wanted hentai, I'd of not bothered.
In that show's case I felt the sudden bum-rush of fanservice and nudity was an insult to my genuine expectations for a cool action show with some attractive female characters, but that it wouldn't boil down to exploiting their bodies. Which is exactly what it did in the first 20 minutes. Felt like a slap in the face, and that's with full-bodied adult women.
FWIW I have the same feelings on gratuitous violence; make sure it's there for a thematic/plot/character purpose and use it sparingly.
I really wish you guys would stop using the term moe to describe what you dont like. Take the extra 30 seconds and rather type 'cutesy archetypes', 'sexualized kids' etc The term moe really doesnt mean what you guys think it does, It literally means nothing to everyone but something to someone.
But using "moe" helps save server space.