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My coworker thinks I'm stalking her because I found her home address on a website
- Thread starter jadedm17
- Start date
- Status
John Kowalski
Banned
Still freaks me the fuck our that you can just search for someone's address
| Praxis |
Banned
GHG
Gold Member
Then what on earth is the point of the Facebook exercise?
And someone he claims to never think about.
Yet he went to the effort to search for more information about her and was then interested enough in that information to memorise it.
jadedm17
Member
We share the same birth month, which I retained, and forgot the rest quicker than the 7 seconds to type her name; The whole process of everyone I searched took less time than microwave popcorn. Care to define what you mean by "effort"? I've spent more time on this thread now than I have spent talking to or thinking about this girl.
The other night I had a dream about a coworker from over five years ago that's never crossed my mind since, any input on that?
Messofanego
Banned
HR is not your friend. Reporting someone is basically you telling them, "Hey, I took this job just so I could sue this company".
I know people who'd look up this type of info before every interview with someone. Facebook, LinkedIn, calling contacts at the school, the works. That shit creeped me out more than this to be honest.
Hoho for breakfast
Member
Everybody's done something similar so don't worry about that.
The fuck up was saying anything about it. And then making a thread on Gaf about it where everyone is always better than OP and would never do such a thing.
The fuck up was saying anything about it. And then making a thread on Gaf about it where everyone is always better than OP and would never do such a thing.
Gravy Boat
Member
There's really no effort required in remembering a birthday that falls in the same month as your own. Like, there's no conscious effort required to remember that. You're trying to hard here.
old manatee
Banned
If you are a totally innocent, totally harmless man, and you have a legitimate broken arm, and you just happen to be in a dark parking lot, and you are just trying to move a couch into the back of your Econoline so that you can deliver it to couch-less orphans, and you reach out to a passing woman for help, and she responds by tasering your nuts and telling a police officer, SHE BEHAVED PROPERLY IN THAT SITUATION AND SHOULD BE REWARDED FOR HER BRAVERY.
It doesn't make you a bad person because you need help moving a couch, but ignoring the possible threat of the guy at work who has looked up your home address and also has a GAF account is like the scientists in Prometheus taking their helmets off to get a better look at the Alien eggs.
It doesn't make you a bad person because you need help moving a couch, but ignoring the possible threat of the guy at work who has looked up your home address and also has a GAF account is like the scientists in Prometheus taking their helmets off to get a better look at the Alien eggs.
Haha okay. Thought this might just be attraction induced awkwardness but maybe not.
Well I'd argue there is an effort in searching for someone's personal details and then being interested enough to read them. Not something I'd do for someone I didn't care about anyway but happy to be wrong.
Just curious, are you some sort of super player?
You hadn't even finished your training, yoj talked to this girl all of five minutes and you're already trying to dip your pen in the company ink (big mistake). Also you keep saying you never think about this girl at all, so its like a co-worker sends what you think is a signal and you straight up ask her on a date while at the same time shes absolutely irrelevant and almost invisible to you. Have you asked any others out?
I would recommend calming your passions. Sounds like whether its fair or not shes labelled you as a creep to the rest of the women now. Best to lay low for a bit.
H.Protagonist
[-_-]/
Everyone does stupid stuff, but that's definitely entering stalker behavior, OP. Whatever your intentions, however you feel about it, try to imagine what it's like to be a woman who just had a near stranger (who has stated a romantic interest in her) suddenly reveal he knows her home address. Try and appreciate how scary that is and stop framing it as something that "happened" to you or "missed the mark."
Gravy Boat
Member
That's not what happened. She told OP her birth month and he said 'I know'. As far as I can tell, he never mentioned anything about her address.
vonStirlitz
Unconfirmed Member
So basically we have:
- inappropriate and detailed searching on co-workers factual background details
- inappropriate assumption that co-worker is open to relationship despite no more than 5 minutes shared chat
- inappropriate sharing of this scenario with a very large and very public online forum
Oh dear
- inappropriate and detailed searching on co-workers factual background details
- inappropriate assumption that co-worker is open to relationship despite no more than 5 minutes shared chat
- inappropriate sharing of this scenario with a very large and very public online forum
Oh dear
Come on. Just because you and many others do, doesn't mean we all do.
old manatee
Banned
"My blood type is O positive."
"O I know."
"O I know."
don't forget eavesdropping on co-worker's bathroom convo
ZackieChan
Member
The memories come flooding back to me.
Can't fault the dude for researching before making that investment. It's the dating equivalent of reading a prospectus.
H.Protagonist
[-_-]/
It's in the thread title. And in the OP he shared with her how he got the birth date from a site that reveals things like a home address.
OP stated he heard it from another co-worker.
Regardless, it is creeping me out some here say this is normal
No, I do not seek out home address of some people I'm not close with in a state or commercial database. Projection much?
Gravy Boat
Member
It's in the thread title because it was edited by a Mod. OP never mentions telling her about the address.
autumnleaf
Member
Literally day 1, lesson 1 of Stalker School is not to do this.
ZackieChan
Member
This is the problem with Mod Edits. Any mods in FL? I'm gonna look one up and leave a note on their door. And send an appropriately timed birthday card.
old manatee
Banned
I think the rule should be that you are allowed to Google someone's name, or look at their public Facebook page. That's the modern day equivalent of looking someone up in the the phone book.
if you are on a site called floridaresidentsdb.com and you are learning about their political affiliations and video rental history you have gone too far.
if you are on a site called floridaresidentsdb.com and you are learning about their political affiliations and video rental history you have gone too far.
Op I think you're completely thinking this just from your perspective . Say randomly a coworker say male dropped his Id by mistake . You go up hand it back and say you noticed his birthday was the same month as yours would you mention it while handing it back? maybe ... but say you met him couple days later would you ever go "hey same birth month" ? That is just too intrusive for someone you're not pally with ... You can chance upon info just out of curiosity that's k... but you have to appreciate the position you put this girl in ....
Edit a second person doesn't have to understand your minds and approaches inner workings especially when you aren't even friends ...
Edit a second person doesn't have to understand your minds and approaches inner workings especially when you aren't even friends ...
H.Protagonist
[-_-]/
Thread title aside, then, he told her how he found out about the birthday. Telling someone you looked them up on a site that shows personal information is as good as saying that you know their home address now, and this one did. OP said he saw the address. Even though he adds that it didn't register in his brain for more than half a second, it doesn't matter. It's on the site, and he's told her that that's what he used. He doesn't have to look her in the eye and whisper "I know where you live" for her to understand this.
"Nice deviantart profile"
Eeh true you can always make a zodiac sign comment birth month seems wonky tho . But that's going off topic l
These type of threads are always ultimately so unsatisfying. The OP hardly ever returns with a lesson learned.
But this does remind me that you could pull up my address with a simple search of my full name. Shit is creepy. I don't even know how it got on the internet. Public records my ass.
But this does remind me that you could pull up my address with a simple search of my full name. Shit is creepy. I don't even know how it got on the internet. Public records my ass.
Is that for real ? She's as sick as her stalker, like wtf...
fabricated backlash
Member
OP needs to seriously re-evaluate what kind of knowledge he wants to share with the world.
I don't think there was any malicious intent. More likely the OP is incredibly naive.
I don't think there was any malicious intent. More likely the OP is incredibly naive.
Naw, It's a bit like masturbation. Everyone does it, but that doesn't mean you should talk about it. Keep that to yourself.
But there's always that one dude that claims he never masturbated because of all the pussy he is getting. No one really believes him, though.
DarknessTear
Banned
Just tell her you're socially awkward, you spoke to a friend and you realize now that you were in the wrong. Then maybe you can somehow come out of this not looking like a crazed stalker. If people forgive and forget and don't spread the news around like wildfire.
old manatee
Banned
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