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[nan0]

Man, I'm so frustrated that I for the life of me I can't think of adequate first messages to women I'm interested in. I think I have decent profiles, okay photos and my previous dates went well enough although we just didn't click in the end.
"Oh you've studied X? I specialized in that in my Y studies, it's amazingly interesting" (replace with movies, music, traveling at will) is so cringeworthily cheesy, yet basically the only thing that ever comes to my mind when reading profiles. It's ridiculous, I can' be the only one with that problem.

 

[Gray Matter]

Man, I'm so frustrated that I for the life of me I can't think of adequate first messages to women I'm interested in. I think I have decent profiles, okay photos and my previous dates went well enough although we just didn't click in the end.
"Oh you've studied X? I specialized in that in my Y studies, it's amazingly interesting" (replace with movies, music, traveling at will) is so cringeworthily cheesy, yet basically the only thing that ever comes to my mind when reading profiles. It's ridiculous, I can' be the only one with that problem.

Nope, you're not the only one. I'm
Currently staring at a profile, that is well written, and I have nothing amusing to say. Based on her profile I think we would click, but that doesn't mean anything.

 

[gaiages]

Date was like super short, wasn't feeling that. She went for a kiss on the mouth when I walked her to the car, and wanted to hang again. She texted me when she got home, and I texted her back. I said I would have liked to spent more time with her. I didn't get a text back, and I don't really care. Just felt very weird. Spent my Saturday night beating the Witcher 3, which isn't the worst way to spend a night but I'd rather have been out with a lovely young lady.

Which kinda leads to another problem. I don't really have a ton of friends to go out, bar hope and try and meet girls in real life. My best friend usually is working weekends and I'm always working Friday nights. That said, even if I did I still have confidence issues approaching but I feel like this should be my next step.

Are you able to request a Friday night off anytime in the future? Even if a bar hop doesn't lead to anything, it'd be a good experience to have, especially if your bestie is a good wingman, imo. :3

 

[Jokab]

Man, I'm so frustrated that I for the life of me I can't think of adequate first messages to women I'm interested in. I think I have decent profiles, okay photos and my previous dates went well enough although we just didn't click in the end.
"Oh you've studied X? I specialized in that in my Y studies, it's amazingly interesting" (replace with movies, music, traveling at will) is so cringeworthily cheesy, yet basically the only thing that ever comes to my mind when reading profiles. It's ridiculous, I can' be the only one with that problem.

Nope, you're not the only one. I'm
Currently staring at a profile, that is well written, and I have nothing amusing to say. Based on her profile I think we would click, but that doesn't mean anything.

If you can't figure out anything funny to say, just say something random.

"What is your opinion on dragons?"
"How would you do in a zombie apocalypse?"
"Who would win in a fight, Batman or Superman?"
"Isn't it weird that <insert random thought>"

Or you could make up a story about one of her pictures, followed by "How close was I?".

 

[ant_]

Good ol phone-call tactic. Many women will schedule a phone call from a friend and then decide on the date whether its nothing or a reason to leave. They be smart in how they deceive.

That's what I thought, too. She messaged me/snapchatted me last night and wants to date again and said, " Don't be surprised if I ask you to come over randomly."

 

[Deleted member 529084]

I'm confused... So some other guy made an innuendo at her, she didn't seem to even instigate it, and your whole night is ruined? That sounds like some serious jealously issue right there. That's a very poor response, honestly; unless she specifically said something made to elicit that sort of response... Which it didn't seem like she did. It's just a comment on Instagram.

I know it seems overly jealous but what gets me is why he would do it?

From what I was told about this guy...he's a rich collector, she met on a large tour with other collectors 2/3 weeks ago.
The following day her, him, and another collector had dinner. After dinner he walked her too her car and tried to kiss her, she denied him (she says) by saying she's seeing someone (me).

Maybe I'm just being over-analytical but who does that?
I'm sleeping with her and I wouldn't make lewd comments like that...so what gets in this guy's head to make an innuendo comment alluding to licking her tits?

My head races to thoughts of how are they talking when I'm not around? Is she inviting these type of comments? Is she flirtatious and I don't know?

The guys a collector/dealer she's working with, hes having her likeness used in a painting she commisioned and I've also learned he got her a gift or some shit she hasn't received yet (he's on west coast)

I myself just wouldn't throw out innuendo comments to a woman I had a proffesional connection with ora friendly one.

I just feel like I'm getting him with bulshit.

All I got from her yesterday while she's in the islands is..
2-3 photos of her
And before bed last night a text saying "We should go to Spain, it would be romantic to go with you"
No reponse to my response and nothing today..
I'm guessing it was a drunk text lol

 

[GK86]

Are you really wondering why someone would make those type of comments?

Why a GUY would make those types of comments?

Guys will make sexual innuendos to a tree if they thought it would get them laid.

 

[ant_]

I know it seems overly jealous but what gets me is why he would do it?

From what I was told about this guy...he's a rich collector, she met on a large tour with other collectors 2/3 weeks ago.
The following day her, him, and another collector had dinner. After dinner he walked her too her car and tried to kiss her, she denied him (she says) by saying she's seeing someone (me).

Maybe I'm just being over-analytical but who does that?
I'm sleeping with her and I wouldn't make lewd comments like that...so what gets in this guy's head to make an innuendo comment alluding to licking her tits?

My head races to thoughts of how are they talking when I'm not around? Is she inviting these type of comments? Is she flirtatious and I don't know?

The guys a collector/dealer she's working with, hes having her likeness used in a painting she commisioned and I've also learned he got her a gift or some shit she hasn't received yet (he's on west coast)

I myself just wouldn't throw out innuendo comments to a woman I had a proffesional connection with ora friendly one.

I just feel like I'm getting him with bulshit.

All I got from her yesterday while she's in the islands is..
2-3 photos of her
And before bed last night a text saying "We should go to Spain, it would be romantic to go with you"
No reponse to my response and nothing today..
I'm guessing it was a drunk text lol

Dude, I think you need to take a step back. Pretty girls get hit on, it's a fact of life. Don't blame it on her. Trust her unless she gives you reason not to.

 

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

So it's OK for you to flirt with fuck knows how many women, but one guy makes one comment at one of your girls and you throw a hissy fit? LOL.

Seriously, the fuck? Even if he wasn't dating others, he's getting mad over someone else's actions? Dude is insecure as hell and being a douche. Either you trust her or you don't and plan your relationship accordingly but don't pin this on her like she did something wrong.

 

[Symphonia]

I know it seems overly jealous but what gets me is why he would do it?

You yourself have admitted that you have three or more women on the go at the same time. You are in no position whatsoever to judge guys for making a flirty comment towards one of your women. I find it funny that you're basically attempting to turn your guilt in to jealousy, but failing, and coming across as a douche in the process. Good job.

 

[gaiages]

Wait.

You think he made an innuendo at licking her... tits?

Heh.

And for real, everyone's speaking the truth here. He made a comment, so the fuck what? If you don't trust her because someone else hit on her while you secretly message ladies on the side, you probably don't deserve to be in a relationship. That's waaaay overly jealous, and hypocritical to boot. Women get hit on, and men will attempt to make moves, it happens. If you can't deal with that, then don't date anyone.

Blunt, but how I feel, sorry.

 

[Deleted member 529084]

Wait.

You think he made an innuendo at licking her... tits?

Heh.

And for real, everyone's speaking the truth here. He made a comment, so the fuck what? If you don't trust her because someone else hit on her while you secretly message ladies on the side, you probably don't deserve to be in a relationship. That's waaaay overly jealous, and hypocritical to boot. Women get hit on, and men will attempt to make moves, it happens. If you can't deal with that, then don't date anyone.

Blunt, but how I feel, sorry.

No, you guys are right.

Like I said I have such trust issues I felt like I needed to keep "fall backs" so I'm in the position to throw stones.

And to be honest Friday night before she left, I really put things into perspective..
I did block all the other women on my phone, I am no longer keeping fall backs.

Sure it's been less then 48 hours since I quit my scheming ways but I'm trying to be more focused on her and not have a stable of "just in cases.

I know I'm overeacting.
Just not used to dating a model'esque woman..I've always been a girl next door type. Plus I have trust issues and self esteem issues I'm working through.

Sorry guys...I'm a mess.

 

[Symphonia]

Plus I have trust issues and self esteem issues I'm working through.

That's bullshit. If you have a handful of women on the go at the same time, then you clearly trust them all, and have enough confidence in yourself to keep them all at once. Stop trying to make excuses for your slimebag behaviour.

 

[ant_]

No, you guys are right.

Like I said I have such trust issues I felt like I needed to keep "fall backs" so I'm in the position to throw stones.

And to be honest Friday night before she left, I really put things into perspective..
I did block all the other women on my phone, I am no longer keeping fall backs.

Sure it's been less then 48 hours since I quit my scheming ways but I'm trying to be more focused on her and not have a stable of "just in cases.

I know I'm overeacting.
Just not used to dating a model'esque woman..I've always been a girl next door type. Plus I have trust issues and self esteem issues I'm working through.

Sorry guys...I'm a mess.

I don't know the whole story really, but why don't you just - you know - talk to her?
Say you want something exclusive.

 

[Lamiafusion]

Might as well share my date the other night.

Met up with a girl at Ted's Montana Grill. She is pretty young compared to me. I'm 27, she is 21. I was hoping for a more mature person for her age. She dropped some pretty heavy bombs for a first date conversation. Basically explained the whole story of what happened 6 months prior when her EX dumped her out of nowhere. If she told me it happened the night before, I would have believed her. She was definitely not over it (to say the least.) To put the icing on the cake, she explained in a very roundabout way that I probably wouldn't be kissing her no matter what happened. Apparently some guy tried it on the first date and she cried. YIKES. So I played it cool and got the fuck out of there. So many red flags...jesus...This makes the second girl I've been on dates that is not over their previous relationship. Ugh oh well. I guess the mean thing to say would be that she is was definitely using some angles on her profile pics but she had a cute face I could get used to.

 

[False Witness]

SPMH, you should probably not be dating right now until you work out some of your issues. Your attitude towards other people is coming off as a little toxic and it's not something that's just going to take care of itself in the meantime. I know I sound mean, but, dude... fuck.

 

[Quick]

What do you guys think of Bumble?

Just signed up and swiped a few times. Just waiting for any responses. I guess it's a neat idea to have women be the first to contact, at least you know there's at least some interest, unless it's just Tinder-like spam messages.

 

[GK86]

Sounds interesting. Too bad it is only iOS atm.

 

[davepoobond]

SPMH, you should probably not be dating right now until you work out some of your issues. Your attitude towards other people is coming off as a little toxic and it's not something that's just going to take care of itself in the meantime. I know I sound mean, but, dude... fuck.

I concur. I was going to say dating doesn't sound like something he should do if that is how he reacts to anything

 

[BIGWORM]

Just made a profile on Match.com. Seems like it could be more successful than POF/OKC. On a 7-day free trial. Gonna see if I can just stay on a free trial indefinitely by canceling on day 6, then creating a new profile. Yeah I'll have to go through the questionnaire, but it seems like it could be a good site. Don't worry, I've already set Google Reminder to tell me to cancel on the morning of day 6 lol!

Side note: I love rooting my Android phone. I have an xposed framework for Tinder that will allow me unlimited swipes without paying that bullshit $20/month fee.

 

[Gray Matter]

Tinder bots love me.

 

[User 479360]

The thirty-five year old I mentioned months ago keeps teasing me, and says she likes to bug me, but doesn't seem to actually want sex.

When I went over to her place and gave her a massage, she later mentioned a topless massage the next time. And she's sent me naked pictures/clothed but provocative pictures and talked about masturbation/other things.

She's teasing, though, I think. I don't think she's willing to have casual sex, and I don't know if she wants to date now that we've kind of friendzoned ourselves.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

The thirty-five year old I mentioned months ago keeps teasing me, and says she likes to bug me, but doesn't seem to actually want sex.

When I went over to her place and gave her a massage, she later mentioned a topless massage the next time. And she's sent me naked pictures/clothed but provocative pictures and talked about masturbation/other things.

She's teasing, though, I think. I don't think she's willing to have casual sex, and I don't know if she wants to date now that we've kind of friendzoned ourselves.

Read what you just said, but imagine the guy in your scenario was someone other than you. Seriously. Your posts are so weirdly disjointed and self-effacing for someone who's getting more action than I am.

She's offering to take off her clothes for you, sending you naked pictures, and you're talking about sex and masturbation. Please think again about the implications here.

 

[Deleted member 529084]

SPMH, you should probably not be dating right now until you work out some of your issues. Your attitude towards other people is coming off as a little toxic and it's not something that's just going to take care of itself in the meantime. I know I sound mean, but, dude... fuck.

Ugh...I know.

I accept, I'm a broken person, and too be honest..new to this. I got out of a 14 year relationship not to long ago.
Charisma, humor, etc... thats the easy part. Emotions, trust, etc..thats my kryptonite.

I didnt want to catch feelings, but now I have. All the numbers and dates Ive accumulated over the last 3 months were meant to be just for fun, kinda experience my 20's I missed out on.

Even when me and the knock-out started talking she said "You got game...but mines better. I'm gonna mind fuck you before you mind-fuck me"
Are first two dates were these sexually charged nights, both of us throwing tricks and game at each other...
I didnt mean to catch feelings and I dont think she did...but since are relationship started off as this game, maybe I lost and shes still gaming me!? lol

Its a toxic relationship...we're both toxic people I guess, broken a bit. Shes used to having men eat of her hand and I'm using my charisma and humor to get what I want...both these things are of no use when feelings get involved.

 

[User 479360]

Read what you just said, but imagine the guy in your scenario was someone other than you. Seriously. Your posts are so weirdly disjointed and self-effacing for someone who's getting more action than I am.

She's offering to take off her clothes for you, sending you naked pictures, and you're talking about sex and masturbation. Please think again about the implications here.

Sorry

I'm just confused.

 

[DoktorEvil]

Sorry

I'm just confused.

He's saying you should go for it, dummy.

Cmon. The topless massage should be your biggest clue.

Man, you don't know how frustrating it is to read your progress and see you being so apprehensive, Chewie.

 

[Advocatus Diaboli]

He's saying you should go for it, dummy.

Cmon. The topless massage should be your biggest clue.

Man, you don't know how frustrating it is to read your progress and see you being so apprehensive, Chewie.

I know, right? Chewie's lining up dates like crazy and getting sent nudes, and I'm here in this thread (or maybe it's the other one) cracking jokes about the NBA playoffs with 2 other dudes while having a beer, toasting his good fortune. I never thought, not once in my life, that I'd ever have the occasion to type the following line, but here goes:

Cowboy up and massage those titties.

You have to show interest once it's reciprocated. That's the object lesson here. I mean, absolute worst case scenario is that she isn't interested in having sex with you. Which, you know, is your situation right now: no sex. But there's something like a 99% chance that she does like you, and you could use the practice flirting.

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

Everyone on this website is either pansexual or bisexual or demisexual (what?) or some other kind of sexual.

Not that it has anything to do with anything, but I've noticed that 90% of the people whose profiles I click on have some derivative of the above listed in their profile.

Statistics!

 

[NotTheGuyYouKill]

I don't think anyone wants to be friends with me though. I only have gotten one conversation going with a cool girl in Australia.

Edit:

You should message me if
You wanna chat or hang out*

*and you aren't a rapist

Who... would admit to being a rapist.

 

[User 479360]

I know, right? Chewie's lining up dates like crazy and getting sent nudes, and I'm here in this thread (or maybe it's the other one) cracking jokes about the NBA playoffs with 2 other dudes while having a beer, toasting his good fortune. I never thought, not once in my life, that I'd ever have the occasion to type the following line, but here goes:

Cowboy up and massage those titties.

You have to show interest once it's reciprocated. That's the object lesson here. I mean, absolute worst case scenario is that she isn't interested in having sex with you. Which, you know, is your situation right now: no sex. But there's something like a 99% chance that she does like you, and you could use the practice flirting.

Haha

I offered to do just that, sir. But she didn't bite, just continued to tease.

What confuses me is how much she teases, but how little she wants to actually have casual sex.

I asked for a massage yesterday, and was going to go over, but she said once I get back from LA.

 

[Mr Solo Dolo]

God damn it, the Tinder bots are learning.

Looks like they're actually filling in the About You section now.

 

[Zelias]

Everyone on this website is either pansexual or bisexual or demisexual (what?) or some other kind of sexual.

Means they don't generally feel sexual attraction unless there's also a strong emotional connection.

 

[stn]

@Chewie

Personally I find it weird about this whole massage thing. Its like, "massage me and then go home. And in a few days you can massage my tits." I do think she's teasing you. What you should do in the future is escalate physical tension differently. Refuse stuff like massaging, cuddling, and so forth. I'm not a fan of the massaging thing because its one-sided, only you are pleasuring her. Should be something where both parties are getting hot in the moment. And cuddling is usually a death sentence if its done before sexy time or before being in an official relationship.

If I had to just "massage" a girl then I'd literally be forced to go home and finish the night watching porn.

 

[gaiages]

I don't think anyone wants to be friends with me though. I only have gotten one conversation going with a cool girl in Australia.

Edit:



Who... would admit to being a rapist.

I'm both happy and jealous that you find these crazy profiles and I just find boring, poorly spelled ones.

 

[DoktorEvil]

I don't think anyone wants to be friends with me though. I only have gotten one conversation going with a cool girl in Australia.

Edit:

Who... would admit to being a rapist.

Rapists, obviously. DUH!

All of the ones I'm finding are nowhere near as crazy as that. They're pretty boring.

 

[Salamando]

Haha

I offered to do just that, sir. But she didn't bite, just continued to tease.

What confuses me is how much she teases, but how little she wants to actually have casual sex.

I asked for a massage yesterday, and was going to go over, but she said once I get back from LA.

Is this the same lady you massaged in early April - As detailed here.? How many times have you seen her since? It sounds like you're exactly where you were then.

If over the course of two months you've only gotten pics, she's wasting your time. She's likely using you to deal with her own insecurities. Figures if she can still get a late-20's man's blood pumping, she must still got it.

 

[Malvingt2]

OKC didn't work for me and PoF is a mess. I am giving Match a chance... sigh... :/

 

[stn]

Question about Match. I found a code for a free 7 day trial. It still asks me to choose a plan. Do I basically choose a plan, use the trial for 6 days, and then cancel? It won't bill me then, right? Can anyone confirm this works? Thank you!

 

[Deleted member 529084]

I'd go Match all the way.

My accounts closed while I'm actually dating my "Match find" out of a sign of respect but it was effective from day one.

Things I learned from talking to the girls on their..
3 pics, good headshots and a body shot. I just had 2 nice selfies sitting in my car. Used beauty filter and instagram mixed with natural lighting.

Nobody wants to see your muscles. Most girl next door girls would screen shot these guys and we would have a laugh.
Nobody wants to see pic of your pets
Every guy has the "I love the outdoors" in their profile
Nobody wants to see the group photo. Chances are someone in the photo is who they hope you are, and they'll just be disappointed.

I would pay the $2 at peak times to be bumped to top spot. Weekdays 5-9, Weekends 8-12
Like the worse photo they have, dont add to the 9000 likes the have on thier bikini pic

I had a copy+paste intro email..

Hi,
I'm really new at this so please excuse me if I come off awkward or a bit creepy.
I really enjoyed your profile and found your pics to be cute.

Really hoping we could chat some more, perhaps see if we share some common interest.
If that sounds good with you please feel free to message me back.

Take care,
Your name

I spammed that sucker out.

My Profile intro tag was from Anchor man "I instantly regret this decision"
My bio was craaaaaazy short...all it read was basically "Looking to make friends, nothing serious unless the right person comes along."
thats it...I didnt write paragraph after paragraph..nobody reads that shit. They see your pic and decide right thier.
They dont care about your degrees or your crossfit, they'll find that out later...all they want to know first and foremost is if they can stand to see your mug.

Basically played up the "Ugh, I cant believe Im so pitiful I'm on a dating site" angle

Looking at my email I had 183 messages from May 17th to June 8th...
Only 5 dates but a slew of text buddies, phone sex buddies, or "We will schedule something I promise"

Match was easy to find people to shoot the shit with, go on dates with, chit-chat with...but still seeing if it was a good choice to meet the right person.

 

[ReturnOfTheRAT]

^ That's funny and worth a goofy shot.

I'm pretty sure I know what everyone will say, but I'll put this out here anyway. Also, this kind of thing isn't easily searchable without going through the page by page again..

That lady I hit it off with on Friday and Saturday emailed me her number after I asked if she preferred to stay in the app or swap numbers. Her email came in around 7PM on Saturday night, but I was busy changing the battery in my year-old car. Car purchased 6/13/14. Battery changed 6/13/15. That's a whole other story howver, but the dates made me laugh. Anyways, because of this distraction I didn't respond to her Match email immediately. When I had a chance I texted her just before 8PM and introduced myself. Just before 11PM I went on match and saw her profile was now hidden.

Sidenote: When a profile is hidden your emails are still visible until they expire in 30 days or whatever time frame, so it isn't like that would remove her number or any chats we had. You also can see any details about the person other than their username. Also, any match email receive shows up as a message on the site and as an email to your registered provider. I'm sure some people turn that off because it can blow up your phone if you so in demand...

Back to my story though, my phone was acting up on Saturday night, just my luck, so I tried texting some friends and everything seemed more delayed than usual. So I texted her again (strike 1) and explained my phone has been acting up and hopefully this latest one went through. Foolishly, because I had seen that she hid her profile I called the number as a test of my phone and the validity of the number she sent me. It rang to voicemail, but I didn't leave a message. (Strike 2). The number is real. She's a real person on LinkedIn and Twitter, Snapchat for reference. So I wasn't duped by a fake number.

Now to Sunday. The last thing we had discussed before she gave up her number was how she was a big Warriors fan, Bay Area in general, and that I'm cool as long as I'm not a Lakers fans (yeah, about that...). That afternoon I texted her on saying I'd like to make plans for Friday night of the upcoming week and good luck to the Warriors tonight (Sunday night, Game 5 which they ended up winning). No response that time. (Strike 3)

I'm pretty sure she lost interest, which is odd because she gave up her number when I asked about her preference of staying in the app or taking it to text. All I can do is let that one slide into oblivion. I doubt I'll hear anything and I'm not going push my luck either.

But why give out your number if you don't want the other person to act on it? people are weird I guess.

 

[BIGWORM]

Match has been a game-changer for me. I actually have women giving me their phone number without being solicited. Love this site.

Spoiler

Still not paying for membership, though.

 

[AcridMeat]

Just got home, had solid conversation, hand holding, some kissing. This was the girl in an open relationship currently. She talked about it a bit, stating that they're kind of in a spot where they're the kind of the emotional rock for them to have their back, but said they haven't been physical for a while.

I'm basically in a sitcom where I'm the fun and have another guy doing all the emotional grunt work potentially. This is too good to be true and will end horribly.

Sure enough it was too good to be true, ha! Got a text back saying they really enjoyed meeting and had fun too but that we might be looking for different things out of a relationship.

The funny thing is, I don't even remember discussing what we were looking for in a relationship haha. All I remember was the discussion about her current open relationship, but not what she's looking for off of Okc.

So I sent a response with some clarification, don't expect to hear back but hey! Probably dodged a bullet in the long run.

In the meantime I tried tinder in LA and within the first few profiles I found a woman whose profile detailed how they have type 2 herpes and what the chances of contracting it through her are.

Yeesh.

Good news is I hooked up with an old friend who's back from college for summer here

 

[Deleted member 529084]

^ That's funny and worth a goofy shot.

I'm pretty sure I know what everyone will say, but I'll put this out here anyway. Also, this kind of thing isn't easily searchable without going through the page by page again..

That lady I hit it off with on Friday and Saturday emailed me her number after I asked if she preferred to stay in the app or swap numbers. Her email came in around 7PM on Saturday night, but I was busy changing the battery in my year-old car. Car purchased 6/13/14. Battery changed 6/13/15. That's a whole other story howver, but the dates made me laugh. Anyways, because of this distraction I didn't respond to her Match email immediately. When I had a chance I texted her just before 8PM and introduced myself. Just before 11PM I went on match and saw her profile was now hidden.

Sidenote: When a profile is hidden your emails are still visible until they expire in 30 days or whatever time frame, so it isn't like that would remove her number or any chats we had. You also can see any details about the person other than their username. Also, any match email receive shows up as a message on the site and as an email to your registered provider. I'm sure some people turn that off because it can blow up your phone if you so in demand...

Back to my story though, my phone was acting up on Saturday night, just my luck, so I tried texting some friends and everything seemed more delayed than usual. So I texted her again (strike 1) and explained my phone has been acting up and hopefully this latest one went through. Foolishly, because I had seen that she hid her profile I called the number as a test of my phone and the validity of the number she sent me. It rang to voicemail, but I didn't leave a message. (Strike 2). The number is real. She's a real person on LinkedIn and Twitter, Snapchat for reference. So I wasn't duped by a fake number.

Now to Sunday. The last thing we had discussed before she gave up her number was how she was a big Warriors fan, Bay Area in general, and that I'm cool as long as I'm not a Lakers fans (yeah, about that...). That afternoon I texted her on saying I'd like to make plans for Friday night of the upcoming week and good luck to the Warriors tonight (Sunday night, Game 5 which they ended up winning). No response that time. (Strike 3)

I'm pretty sure she lost interest, which is odd because she gave up her number when I asked about her preference of staying in the app or taking it to text. All I can do is let that one slide into oblivion. I doubt I'll hear anything and I'm not going push my luck either.

But why give out your number if you don't want the other person to act on it? people are weird I guess.

I had, maybe 5, girls do this too me. The worse are the ones who you take from Match emails, to phone text, to actual calls...then one day *poof* theyre done with you.
The night I took out the Persian girl was because this 26 year old HOTTIE from Delaware decided the day of our scheduled date was the day she was gonna not respond or pick up the phone anymore.
Luckily I friend zoned the Persian girl and "broke glass in case of emergency" and still went out that night. I fucking got my car detailed for christ sake, I wasnt staying in! LoL

I chit-chat now and again with this recent divorce'ee, shes on some "Im gonna suck as many dicks as I can now that I'm free!" shit, but shes good people and frequents Ashley Madison, Match, PoF etc.. and gave me her insight on this situation..

While us guys focus on one, maybe two females and think "She gave me her number! Shes all mine!"
What really happened was you just got thrown on the pile of "Maybes" she has...
Maybe you went from top spot on her list till 30 minutes later a better guy bumped you down that list to #35 fallback.

I'll even admit...my "CAST A BIG NET" scheme of top spots, spam emails, etc...
often left me overwhelmed...
My phone would be going off, my Match email...it was overwhelming and I let hundreds of women just fall by the wayside.

I'd see a blonde with a crooked eye but a nice ass...I'd go for it. 3 texts later and I'm done now since I'm talking to the slightly overweight girl with a pretty face I met 5min ago..

 

[Kid Kamikaze10]

Didn't even know there was a OT for this. Cool!

So a while ago, I quit all dating sites because I was feeling really shitty. Things got on the up and up and I fixed myself up. So I'm back on the saddle.

I can't seem to delete my POF profile, but I don't use it anyway. Does that site even work for anyone?

OKC just took too much time for me. Really annoying, got a lot of mixed results, and the only date I had there was such a bust I left early (despite the flirting and high chance of getting laid; those just weren't much of an upside at that point). So I'm not going back to it either, not until I want a long term relationship.

Coffee Meets Bagels has been fantastic for me. I'm in NYC, so there are a lot of girls to choose from, many fit my preference, and I've gone on numerous dates. None of them truly worked out, but I feel really comfortable using the app.



Now, here's the crux of my post: Tinder. I've always believed that I suck at using it, but I've also managed to get dates via the app. I recently got back into it and for the hell of it, spent my ride back into the city swiping away.

I ended up with fourteen matches. What a welcome back that was! I essentially going to take the trial and error approach. Talk as I normally do, see what stuff is out of line and what stuff typically works, and see where it goes.


My only concerns are keeping interest (because that's a lot of matches) and my wallet.

 

[nan0]

If you can't figure out anything funny to say, just say something random.

"What is your opinion on dragons?"
"How would you do in a zombie apocalypse?"
"Who would win in a fight, Batman or Superman?"
"Isn't it weird that <insert random thought>"

Or you could make up a story about one of her pictures, followed by "How close was I?".

I'm not sure this would work for the kind of women I'm looking for. We're not teenagers anymore, and I probably wouldn't respond to these kind of messages either.

It's kinda strange that there's so few examples about that, I'd love to read some sample conversations that non socially-inept (unlike me) people would hold.

 

[DeathoftheEndless]

I thought I had a date with a really cute girl on Thursday. She responded to me last night and then apparently deleted her account (her message was normal, so I don't think I caused the deletion, unless she just got cold feet). I'll message her if she re-activates it, but in the meantime, back to the drawing board...

 

[GK86]

^Not only aimed at you, but, try to get their number within 10-15 messages. Move away from online as the primary source of communication.

 

[DeathoftheEndless]

^Not only aimed at you, but, try to get their number within 10-15 messages. Move away from online as the primary source of communication.

Good advice. Should have done that sooner. Live and learn.

 

[keffri]

How does my tinder profile look?

It includes a little about me and doesn't take itself seriously. I'm just doing this for fun anyway.

Think this is a good pic or should I change it to something else? I'm not really a picture person so I don't have much to work with.

 

[Rest]

Huh. Just got a message from a girl that only seems interested in physical traits. Kind of a let down.

How does my tinder profile look?

*image*

It includes a little about me and doesn't take itself seriously. I'm just doing this for fun anyway.

Think this is a good pic or should I change it to something else? I'm not really a picture person so I don't have much to work with.

Looks alright to me.
Edit: I guess I'll add that I thought it was funny, but I didn't laugh at it.